Wonky Got Frontdoored!
Wonky McValtrex was burglarized last night after some bitches opened her unlocked front door and waltzed right in without a problem. Yeah, her front door is always unlocked and easy to get into.
The L.A. Times says that the burglary went down sometime this morning at Wonky's Hollywood Hills herp nest when she wasn't home. The burglars stole $2 million worth of her fugly shit including jewelry and other stuff.
The LAPD are at Wonky's house today looking at footage from the security tapes and talking to whores.
The burglars are lucky Wonky wasn't home at the time, because she would've jumped on their peens and fucked them to death with her toxic vagina. They are no match for the dick bandit.
And it's probably easy for the LAPD to find out who did it. They just have to check all the free clinics today for any dudes asking for a Valtrex prescription, because you know her jewelry is covered with her skank jelly. Especially, her diamond covered puss beads.
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paris u look so pretty there! dont worry about thiose sad jealous losers.. who wish they could be as pretty and rich as you!!
im just glad paris is okay after the break in. i dont think she forgot to lock the door.. this has happened before when she shared a house with nicky! those stupid jerks!! anyways i love you paris
Who cares she probably shits that outta her ass per minute!
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Sit yo ass down!
YAY! Good for the thieves! LOL
This is great news.
Front door unlocked, no vault for $2 million in jewelry, no alarm system, no guard, no doberman...hmmmm what a dumbass. Her insurance company should tell her to fuck off.
she's hot. ever!
www.realitybedroom.com
Why was her door unlocked! She's desperate obviously for something like this to happen so she stays in the news!
------------------------------------------------------------- *I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Warning: don't ever sing Christmas Carols near wonky. A chorus of "Ho Ho Ho" will bring her running...
In other news, the new song called "The Twelve Days of Wonky" was just released on Wonky's record label (ie - nobody wanted to deal with her, so she had to pay them to have them put it out). The lyrics (with apologies to The 12 Days of Rugby) say it all:
"On the 12th day of Christmas, old wonky gave to me...
Twelve twats a twitching
Eleven licking lesbians,
ten torn off titties
nine knawed off nipples
eight aching assholes
seven sucking sisters
six 69'ers
five blowjobs,
4 calling girls,
3 french whores,
2 shithouse doors,
and wonky mcvaltrex, who liked to suck and fuck,
tra la la...
Submitted by Miss Priss on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 8:32pm.
Congrats ChefCammi!!
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Yes, yes! Congrats!
Should totally name him MK :D
Hahahahahahaha! Fuck you bitch! Deal with reality - people are desperate.
Paris Whore was probably "posing' somewhere while her house was ransacked. Strike a pose now, bitch.
I want to live only till I die, no more and no less - Eddie Izzard
Congrats ChefCammi!!
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Rivers says Merry Christmas! And I say Merry Xmas! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqgN0T6f1kg
Bitch prolly paid the thieves to "steal" from her so she can be on the news
Damn Wonky is one fugly ho
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Rivers says Merry Christmas! And I say Merry Xmas! HAPPY HOLIDAYS!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wqgN0T6f1kg
Her face is so shiny. Where's the star filter?
This has insurance fraud written all over it. I know she's dumb but the bitch is that dumb not to lock her doors and turn on the alarm after she's already been robbed once? Ok.
蜘龍====================龍蜘
(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 5:53pm.
Submitted by Zappy on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 5:35pm.
@ CARROTTOP
Farting is joy. Farting is release. Farting is fun in a crowded elevator.
May the flatulence be with you. Live long and prosper.
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♪♪♪ It was just my inflatuation ... ♪♪♪
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
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Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
I thought my heart was broken a while back, but indeed it was just Inflatuation - whole lotta gas.
I want to live only till I die, no more and no less - Eddie Izzard
Hey Everyone- I'm having a BOY!!!
LAST CHANCE TO VOTE! CONTEST ENDS TODAY!!
Vote for my WORST Fashion Moment@ http://www.pronto.com/87060-WM?successMsg=true
Submitted by TITS on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 5:54pm.
_____________________________
Errm, I mean Eddie!
I forgot Jen might be taken to mean the other Jen, the one dating a limp dick douchebag who can only get it off by peeing on his partner.
I hope she gets busted for insurance fraud! Put this ho back in jail-- where she belongs.
According to People she had 2 million dollars' worth of jewellery stolen. What a f*cking lie! You know this piece of trash doesn't have that kind of loot...
SHIT! Typed my adress and there are 64 misfits living in my area. I'd hate to see what would turn up if I used my old Detroit addy.
Sad part is, these are the freaks that got caught.
You call all rock me to sleep tonight while I rest with one eye open. LOL......
Payday came and with it beer.
~~Rudyard Kipling~~
It was Benji Madden, and he snatched Paris' 2 million dollars worth of Valtrex. It's true. He was desperate to have enough for himself and Britney, since Daddy Spears said its OK for them to do the horizontal bop. He is a nice, considerate guy.
*BLOWS kisses to Angel*
Submitted by Stick Stickly on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 2:22pm.
ImpertinentVixen - your avatar rules.
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Why, thank yew. I did it myself with my mad Paint skillz.
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You better watch out, you better not cry.
BYEEEEEEEE, XXY!!!
*SMOOCH!*
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Public Service Announcement
The Puppy Cam Song
Submitted by Bondagebarbie on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 5:56pm.
Pix of Benji's post-Wonky peen can be seen below. It looks like a bacon cheeseroll.
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
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Angel_i
I got your back beesh....
*edited* and I got one of your TITS tits
yeah... Don't give me crap about my grammar. I show up everyday
what else do you HWORES want?
*edited again* Nevermind lol I'm out bitches
Mr Xxyxz has 2 weeks off , So I hope I can come and play. If not I'll see you sluts next year
Gee ,I wonder if another sex tape was 'stolen'. Benji peen!
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
Submitted by xxyxz on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 5:49pm.
Angel_i
I got your back beesh....
*edited* and I got one of your TIT's tits
*
it's an acronym dammit! why does no one believe me?
sniffle
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Angels Shiba Inu 6 Vid
Submitted by Zappy on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 5:35pm.
@ CARROTTOP
Farting is joy. Farting is release. Farting is fun in a crowded elevator.
May the flatulence be with you. Live long and prosper.
=========
♪♪♪ It was just my inflatuation ... ♪♪♪
************************************************
My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
************************************************
Damn! Don't repost that. I sound like I can't speak English! I was waiting for it to roll off!
*
weeellll if pressed i might say you were a little heavy handed with the commas.
reading a book now that doesn't contain a single comma. That's even worse.
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Angels Shiba Inu 6 Vid
Submitted by Clarisse on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 5:19pm.
Momus!
The haunting!!
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Try http://www.willardghost.com/index.php?content=ghostcams
Nearly as addicting as watching puppays sleep. I've been watching between briefs to see if I can spot The Grey Lady.
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
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Submitted by Sibsi on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 5:18pm.
Oh, TITS! So glad to see the Jen avie back!
*
blink
blink
what?
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Angels Shiba Inu 6 Vid
Submitted by TITS on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 5:46pm.
Oooh. Dangerous ground.
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Damn! Don't repost that. I sound like I can't speak English! I was waiting for it to roll off!
;p
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Public Service Announcement
The Puppy Cam Song
Oooh. Dangerous ground.
Missing White Girl Syndrome. It is a disease said, by certain groups, that has permanently infected the media from long, long ago.
*
are you putting forth the possibility that the main stream media views the life of a white young girl to be of more value than a similar person of colour?
Didn't you know? Black people don't get killed, wounded or abducted ever.
Was jon benet ramsay black? see? proof!
+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+~~~+
Angels Shiba Inu 6 Vid
@ CARROTTOP
Farting is joy. Farting is release. Farting is fun in a crowded elevator.
May the flatulence be with you. Live long and prosper.
Momus!
The haunting!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow,
Let me lay my holy hand upon you.
Oh, TITS! So glad to see the Jen avie back!
Submitted by Clarisse on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 4:17pm.
Carrot!!!
Nice bulge!!! Why Jared, is that a cod-piece or are you happy to see me?
Actually the oubliette ref came from a special I watched last night on Leap Castle in Ireland. They would take their prisoners, toss em in the ole oubliette and that was their "life sentence". They starved and rotted down there. (yeah, I watch weird shit)
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Were you watching for the haunting, the hellgate, or the dungeons?
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
************************************************
Megan's Law Info: Most state attorney or state attorney general's offices, most local sheriff's offices, and most police departments have a link to a Megan's Law database that can be accessed for free.
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
************************************************
Submitted by xxyxz on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 4:47pm.
I was the same way on Tuesday...
*tosses beano your way*
*Clips toenails*
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*Farts in your mouth*
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Own it like a strap-on.
Submitted by aquarius on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 4:30pm.
What I don't understand (and don't crucify me here) is why the Caylee Anthony story is national news.
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Oooh. Dangerous ground.
Missing White Girl Syndrome. It is a disease said, by certain groups, that has permanently infected the media from long, long ago.
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed Public Service Announcement
The Puppy Cam Song
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 4:41pm.
Off topic: I can't stop farting.
I was the same way on Tuesday...
*tosses beano your way*
*Clips toenails*
@ Stoney, gotcha! I am out of the NG loop, except when I see a clip of her on the Soup.
Submitted by Clarisse on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 4:42pm.
Carrottop,
I am all for pedos/rapists/murders being drawn and quartered. Also, mimes.
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Personally my pick is snotty retail bitches.
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Own it like a strap-on.
Aquarius/KD,
I also think it has a lot to do with aesthetics. Pretty people in trouble make better news.
Carrottop,
I am all for pedos/rapists/murders being drawn and quartered. Also, mimes.
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Deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow,
Let me lay my holy hand upon you.
Off topic: I can't stop farting.
***********************************
Own it like a strap-on.
Aquarius: David Camm is correct. He was a neighbor of one of my coworkers.
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"I'm intellectual & stuff." "You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue & stuff."
http://www.myspace.com/dramaqueen365247
I agree with Stoney
Nancy Grace makes and breaks stories
I also agree with KD
Submitted by Clarisse on Fri, 12/19/2008 - 4:17pm.
Carrot!!!
Nice bulge!!! Why Jared, is that a cod-piece or are you happy to see me?
Actually the oubliette ref came from a special I watched last night on Leap Castle in Ireland. They would take their prisoners, toss em in the ole oubliette and that was their "life sentence". They starved and rotted down there. (yeah, I watch weird shit)
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I saw one where the prisoners had the option of starving to death or falling deeper into the ocean to drown. Sweet apple pie. It's almost sad there aren't those sorts of punishments anymore.
Also, there's cod in my piece, which is why I a)smell like a fish taco, and b)look like I'm giving you the ol' pecker high five.
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Own it like a strap-on.
So, I just went to the family watchdog site and found out a dude who lives in my building that I see everyday in the elevator sodomized and sexually battered someone 24 years ago.