John Mayer Hates Jennifer Aniston's Dog Friends
Most dog owners have a rule that if you don't become BFFs with their dog(s), then the fuck party must come to an end. It doesn't look like Jennifer Aniston is one of those dog owners. Gatecrasher says that Jenny did not bring her dogs, Norman and Dolly, to NYC while she promotes Marley & Me, because John Mayer would probably strangle or curse them out. He apparently hates hates haaaates them. So Jenny left them in Los Angeles, probably because she's dickmatized. And when you're dickmatized, the dick rules all.
A source said that John even hated Jessica's Simpson's angel of a dog Daisy. There's a special place in the toilet closet in hell for people who hate Daisy Simpson.
Jenny's spokeswhore said the story is made of a million lies, but I believe it. John Mayer probably farts at anything that takes the attention anyway from him. When Jennifer brushes her teeth, he totally yells at her fucking toothbrush. He's gross.
As a dog owner, I've never met a dude who didn't like my dog. It's mostly been the other way around. They like my dog better than they like me. They come over to hang out with my dog and leave me in the fucking corner like I'm a damn fern. My dog knows it too. He gives me looks like "Yeah, bitch. I got yo man!"
I honestly don't think I'd ever find a dude who liked me but didn't like my dog. I mean, my dog and me are so much alike. We both are stupid lazy sluts who love bacon and are easily amused by rubber toys. If you don't like him, you don't like me.
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Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 12:02am.
cortex: a maxi-pad made from apples
someone asked for a troll for xmas?
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ROLL I asked for a roll. Dammit!
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Angels Shiba Inu 6 Vid
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 12:13am.
Trick question, I like dogs better than people. The absence of opposable thumbs keeps them from trolling on dlisted.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
*licks TITS cheek* Same here
He prolly hates puppers because one peed on his leg thinking he was a stump.
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
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A man who doesn't love dogs is completely useless in my book.
Mrs. K.
I just got in from work and saw the expressions of sympathy.
I am so sorry about your loss of your adored kitty.
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
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I really hate him, he's ugly and stupid and hates dogs!
Submitted by whatdoyouwant on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:58pm.
Do you people know what the forum is for?
TO those of you with real drama, I hope life get better but sharing it on the internet is a foolish move on your part and for the rest with your fakery-fuck stories: you are boring. NOBODY cares.
Either go to the forum or create your own (you know the drill)
PS: Mrs Kravitz you rock and sorry about your lovely kitty
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I like you long time.
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Angels Shiba Inu 6 Vid
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 12:08am.
Of course I'm quick, you think I want to be there when her husband gets home?
.....
Husband? It that what the kids call pimps these days.
TV? Would TV stop climbing in through her window if you didn't like her doggies? (on topic!)
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John's just jealous because the dog can lick it's own crotch, and he gets bitten every time he tries to do it.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
If you don't like my dog, then you can get the fuck out of my life. I don't like you!
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I don't want to be your other half, I believe that one and one make two
- Alanis Morisette "Not The Doctor"
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 12:07am.
Of course I'm quick, you think I want to be there when her husband gets home?
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
@TV: You fight like a puppy;p
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed YouTube Gallery
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 12:02am.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 12:01am.
cortex: a maxi-pad made from apples
someone asked for a troll for xmas?
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Fuck you're quick. Bet it's not the first time you've heard that... hehe.
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Submitted by MyTwoCents on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 12:01am.
cortex: a maxi-pad made from apples
someone asked for a troll for xmas?
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:57pm.
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:55pm.
Yeah, like you don't already have that image burned into your cortex.
.......
What? Just because lasered that image into my bedroom door doesn't mean... what?... Ohhh..cortex. Nevermind.
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Correction, Mrs. K! *I* am the best.
He's the beginner
I am the winner
Have another competition for dinner
Sit him at a table with a plate and cup
Say Grace
And then eat his ass up!
=)
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed YouTube Gallery
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:46pm.
Thanks doll. You're one of the biggest hearted slutz around here.
Hugs and smooches.
(BTW, that's applesauce and sour cream in TITS'S avie)
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Mrs. K., I feel like a tard now for even mentioning it. I just wanted to be sure you knew I had you in my thoughts, hon and I came off sounding like a spazzy tada chile.
Applesauce and Sour cream? Damn! My eyes must be getting old! If you ever need a shoulder just let me know and I'll share my email here with you and some mandatory pictures of my fur-babies. haha. You know, girl...we are both living but 50 minutes or so from each other and we haven't visited each other! Can I put you on my 'persons I'd love to meet IRL that I can actually afford visiting list?" We are SNOWED in like crazy here. I haven't seen this kind of snow in WA state since I was a teeny bopper!
Thank you for the kind words (as always)...so many of us have missed you here...but I understand taking a break from the drama...
((BIG SQUISHY HUG))
I hope with all my heart you manage to have an enjoyable holiday even though your heart is aching. I keep wanting to say something really profound or spirit lifting but I know no matter what anyone says your loss is your own experience and being sad is OK too. Sometimes we try too hard to cheer each other up during times of sorrow when really we just need the love and support and let us ride it through. :)
I'm with ya, z-listed.
I hit the button on the radio So fast every time a song of his comes on!
Ohmygod, whenever I hear that whiny "Yar Bad-dy is a Wan-derland" or that stupidfucking Waitin' on the World to Change the STATION! FUCK! I clamp my hands over my ears! Rotten leprosy-testicled son of a whore!!!!!!
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:55pm.
Yeah, like you don't already have that image burned into your cortex.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:49pm.
LOL!! I'm sorry :)
*picturing Seacrest in a tafetta frock and princess heels* Lol.
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TV, you're the best, don't forget that.
Letinstar, James Haven, and everyone else, thank you for your support.
See, this is why I love dlisted!
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Jimmy Mack, when are you coming back?
...and Jennifer Aniston's dog friends hate John Mayer...like me!
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:41pm.
That's not right, I'm supposed to be the poker, not the pokee. I feel like Ryan Seacrest on prom night now.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by Clarisse on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:37pm.
No need for apology's! I is just a little easy to make cry when people talk about the loss of pets. The Rainbow bridge was so beautiful it made me cry times. Gah! I'm cool now. And I think that anyone that rescues a disguarded animal deserves all the love they get back from them x 1000.
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Submitted by . on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:10pm.
Mrs. K.! I gave you love too and you didn't even notice. *sniff-sniff*
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DOT!!!!
I was eating my dinner thinking, "uh oh, I forgot to acknowledge Dot's expression of sympathy. She's gonna put my ass in a sling!"
♥
Thanks doll. You're one of the biggest hearted slutz around here.
Hugs and smooches.
(BTW, that's applesauce and sour cream in TITS'S avie)
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Jimmy Mack, when are you coming back?
If this is true, then it is just as I suspected. John Mayer is a stupid, talentless douche who should be ignored by everyone the way he is ignored by me. I hit the button on the radio So fast every time a song of his comes on!
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:29pm.
spoooooky
*hides under couch*
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*pokes under couch with stick* hehe.
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Submitted by . on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:32pm.
Right back atcha on the grief thing.
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TV!
Don't hide!!! Fur and feet neva mean you harm! Wait!!! That was a typo right??? You meant 'Kisses' right???
My Two Cents,
'Pologies!!! Throw away animals and people that give them homes are ma weakness!!
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Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona bay.
John has certainly mastered that single facial expression. He's totally gonna start stealing Nicole Kidman's roles.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
MyTwoCents, cheer up, hon...I know we've all been sharing a little too much of our own personal grief here but 'tis the season to be grievin'! Buck up, little soldier girl. Your avatar makes me smile so big my face is afraid to get stuck thatta way!
Submitted by Clarisse on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:22pm.
spoooooky
*hides under couch*
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by Clarisse on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:22pm.
♥U *sniffs* Clarisse! But you've gotta stop making me cry! Wif your puppeh story and Rainbow bridges and *wipes tears from face*. For god sakes... James Haven's gonna see me with makeup all smeared and red eyes *sniffs*
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My Two Cents,
My nephew was 4 or 5 when their family Rottie, Jazz died. One night, while my sis was tucking him into bed, he asked for another blanket. My sis asked why he needed another blanket and he said
that when Jazzie got into bed with him, that it got cold...
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Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona bay.
Ew, why won't this annoying oatmeal couple go away!?!??!?!
"Get up and see the sarcasm in my eyes..." -Robbie Williams
john mayer IS jennifer aniston's dog
he is so gross
*****
~~not quite a Britaloonie~~
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
"YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE MY NUTS."-ShamWow Vince
Submitted by MyTwoCents on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:12pm.
Submitted by TITS on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:08pm.
And you brought Latkes!
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in honour of mrs k's latke party which i sadly had to miss. :(
gotta tell you though - mine have NEVER looked like that pic!
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Angels Shiba Inu 6 Vid
Submitted by TITS on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:11pm.
i love rotties too. my cat not so much. saw the little devil advance hissing on a rottie once. the dog's feelings were hurt - you could see the look on his face!
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Rotties get a bad wrap. They are actually one of the most cuddliest loving doggies. I know there are aggressive ones, but they're not all like that.
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I'm so sorry for your loss Mrs Kravitz. I want you to take comfort in the fact that if he threw a clot, there is really nothing you could've done to save him. I am sure that "Godfather" aka Sexy Beast, knew how much you loved him. You were the kindest to him, to help him end the pain. You were a good friend, and I feel truly sorry for the pain you are feeling. Please know that I will keep you in my thoughts and hopefully ease the pain in your heart.
Submitted by James Haven
James Haven? I know James Haven has a gift for bringing the pretty to the ladies, but does James Haven agree wif dressing up kittehs and doggies all pretty like?
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Mrs Kravitz,
No human is more special than those that take in the throw aways. Their lives were war until we bring them in....then, they are kings.
Love you!
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Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona bay.
mrs k: sorry to hear about your loss...
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did you sleep with charlie the tuna last night or did you just forget to douche?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrJAgdMLsMI&feature=related
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 10:26pm.
*Hugs to Mrs. K*
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by TITS on Mon, 12/22/2008 - 11:08pm.
And you brought Latkes!
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i love rotties too. my cat not so much. saw the little devil advance hissing on a rottie once. the dog's feelings were hurt - you could see the look on his face!
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Angels Shiba Inu 6 Vid
Tits, are those potato latkes, a poached egg and a biscuit in your avatar? Don't laugh...I have food on the brain this time of year.
Mrs. K.! I gave you love too and you didn't even notice. *sniff-sniff* I keed, No presha. Maybe you hate me or sumpin'. Dassa okay. I can't please all the people all da time. I do hope you're coping okay...grief is a strange beast.
(((Mrs. K))) Sorry to hear about your beloved kitty.
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See James Haven in an Oscar winning performance!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w9cKFiCrSU
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AHAH!!
found you all!
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Angels Shiba Inu 6 Vid
...for Mrs. K
..so, bein' this is a 44 magnum and can blow yer head clean off, you've got to ask yourself just one question...do I feel lucky today?....
...your baby was lucky to have you, Mrs. K...very lucky....
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...how can I miss you when you won't go away?....
kisses and hugs to Mrs. K!
I know you know how it is - nothing last forever except the energetic residue of a life well-lived:)
♥ ThreadKilla!
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