Jacko Is Not Dying
"Yooz a liar!" is what Jacko's spokeswhore is shouting at the bitches who started the rumors that he was mute, blind and on death's door. Ian Halperin, an author working on a Jacko biography, claimed Jackso was suffering from from Alpha 1-antitrypsin deficiency and needed a lung transplant.
Jacko's official rep told People that the story is a "total fabrication" and "Mr. Jackson is in fine health and finalizing negotiations with a major entertainment company and television network for both a world tour and a series of specials and appearances." This makes sense since tranny zombies don't need lungs to breathe.
The best part is that Jacko's "official spokesperson" goes by the name of Dr. Tohme Tohme. HA! Is he related to Dr. Bombay from Bewitched? Or maybe he's one of Jambi the Genie's shady ass cousins. I swear, Jacko always surrounds himself with hos who have the best names. I mean, Blanket, Bubbles, Majestik Magnificent, Louie the Llama and now Dr. Tohme Tohme.
By the by, Dr. Tohme Tohme probably lives in a fortune teller booth at Disnelyland, because he is not for real. Google him, you dumbfuck! You won't find shit.
So you can breath a sigh of relief that Jacko is able to breath a sigh of relief.
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Submitted by Jay6385 on Thu, 12/25/2008 - 11:51pm.
You know I don't need haters like you guys or Michael K who apparantly let's 3rd graders write his articles for him since his name is JACKSON J-A-C-K-S-O-N not "Jacko"
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What? You know Jacko is his nickname, right? From like forever ago...?
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed YouTube Gallery
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
You know I don't need haters like you guys or Michael K who apparantly let's 3rd graders write his articles for him since his name is JACKSON J-A-C-K-S-O-N not "Jacko" but to finish integrity and professionalism is what has died which is sad and true infact it hasn't existed since edward r. murrow died only hate and slander sadly has taken over.
He and the CatWoman are tied for the World's Number One self-made freaks.
Freak
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I get up around seven...Get outta bed around nine...And I don't worry about nothin' no
'cause worryin's a waste of my... time
"So you can breath a sigh of relief that Jacko is able to breath a sigh of relief"
BREATH?? have you seen his nose??? WTF is up with his nose?? How can he possibly breath with that nose??
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Why be difficult when for 20 bucks and hand job I could be impossible!
Oh no, he is dying and he will give me his liver to live on in my fabulous body
Couldn't you have waited until after Christmas to give this depressing news?
He should play Vegas,he would make a lot of money.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
Completely off topic: I need to find out the deal with Michael's Hair. I don't believe it's all real, or all his. I need to know if it is extensions or a weave of some sort. He did have a full beaming nappy afro as a child, but hair relaxers can take a toll on your hair if used as consistently as it appears he has. His hairline shows no signs of his previous nappy incarnation. Sluts, don't tell anyone, but I'm working on a screenplay biopic about Jacko, but written from the point of view of his Hair, and what it's been through all these years. The tales it could tell...
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"This is official now, the most secure bathroom break in the history of law enforcement." - Alexander Mahone
does he, doesn't he???
he may have panniculitis, which is an inflammation of the fat under the skin, that is associated with alpha-1 deficiency. the best way to lessen its impact is to reduce the amount of subcutaneous fat in one's body. look at him - skin and bones. that would also account for the constant wearing of flannel pjs - he is trying to keep warm.
he is not jaundiced, however, nor does he seem to have the barrel chest associated with emphysema, which results from this illness.
last time i checked, jacko was not of northern european, iberian or saudi arabian descent (tho one never knows what lurks in the closet)
Wesołych Świąt and Merry Christmas to everyone :)
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Interviewer: You're playing one of the most famous characters in movie history. How come we don't see you in all the tabloids?
Daniel Craig: Because I don't want to be in them.
That's some made up doctor's name right there. Jacko has been looking like death for years now, I just figured he had some wasting away disease. Not sure why he bleached his skin or how he did it, that must have cost him a fortune to do!
http://ginarivera.typepad.com/ginasrant/
Is it wrong that I wish he had dickfalloffitis? He may not have that ailment, but he is one sick mofo.
This story had to be fake because he was out trick or treating with his kids for Halloween
i used to defend MJ, was always on his side
now he irks me
www.thatshideous.com
is it like Marissa Tomei? Or the Tom Tom Club?
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
I CAN HAZ LOLO!?!?!? :(
Well, ok - that makes more sense. Cuz I just SAW a recent vid of him and his voice sounded just fine. So good, fine - whatever. He's so freakish all I really want from him is to tell me all his deepest secrets at this point.
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed YouTube Gallery
If that's how he looks in 'fine health' I shudder to think how he would look poorly.It would fry your eyes clean out of your head.
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The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
@ "parissucksliterally"
I JUST WANTED TO THANK YOU FOR PUTTING ONE OF MY FAVORITE SONGS IN YOUR BYLINE!!!
"THE LITTLE RIVER BAND...RULES"!!!
He IS a cartoon character....lmao dr. tohme tohme
If Micheal Jackson can't breathe it's only because BITCH DOESN'T HAVE FREAKING A NOSE.
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"Everything die-diddly-dies, and that's a factoroonie!"
Jacko has had a series of shady PR reps. You can tell how well an entertainer is doing by the quality of the PR firm the entertainer has. Since the PR firms are paid based on results or require a fat monthly retainer, and try to maintain a stable of happening, successful clients, the established firms slough off the non-performing clients.
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Hilton said that, initially, she was afraid to be in the house after the break-in, but she has since "upped the security majorly."
He must really hate himself. Countless nose jobs, white skin, fake hair, fake boy voice, makeup, etc etc. It amazes me how much he has warped/fucked with his own body. I feel bad for his kids. If any of us looked like this and put masks on our kids, or hid them with blankets, we would be investigated. He gets away with too much.
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If he's in fine health why does he wear nothing but flannel jammies everywhere he goes, gets wheeled around in a wheelchair, and look like he could rival Nicole Ritchie pre-baby for 'grossest skeletal body ever'?
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Own it like a strap-on.
So we have many more years left to ridicule him? Awwww, that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
"Just wondering but how many of you bitches acctually read the book? because Im thinkin not many of you have the brain spain too read...."
-Mrs.Hardin21 on Twilight
Guess I lose on the celebrity death pool. Damn - I needed the money.
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AussieBuggerIsRealBitches
Submitted by loozer on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 11:28am.
He is dying - We all are. Merry Christmas all you future corpses.
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Awe, such sweet sentiments for this holiday season. Thanks!! :D
Merry Christmas
Happy Chanukah
Happy New Years
Feliz Navidad
and Wesolych Swiat (to my Polish homegirl, Idiots DML)
and to you too :)
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It's creamie, not prune!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQbwt-dicpo
ay pelo lindo!
he should have a disclaimer that says no actual horses were harmed in the manufacturing of this weave...looks like horse hair to me.
well he's gone from playing with monkeys to dangling babies off balconies. getting a lung transplant from Dr. Who Who seemed perfectly reasonable
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DO NOT get surgery from Dr. Tohme Tohme. Even if he offers it to you for under $100.
Well, his career certainly died about 15 years ago.
He is dying - We all are. Merry Christmas all you future corpses.
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You'll be doin' all right, with your Christmas of white
But I'll have a blue, blue, blue, blue Christmas
A world tour? What's left of his nose would never survive it.
Are there really people who would pay to see him now? Back in the day, I am certain he put on a good show, but now? I dunno.
hes not dying. his nose, another storu entirely.
that thing is right out of a silly putty egg
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
I agree, won't happen.
I will never EVER give this pedophile another dime of my money. EVER.
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And I love you best, you're not like the rest
You're there when I need you , you're there when I need - I'm gonna need you
- Little River Band "Lady"
He isn't? Oh good. Now I can go back to picking my toenails. *yawn*
oh, is it safe here?
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Interviewer: You're playing one of the most famous characters in movie history. How come we don't see you in all the tabloids?
Daniel Craig: Because I don't want to be in them.
A world tour without a new album??
Damn...i miss the 80's Michael Jackson. *sigh*
Mecca Lecca Hi Mecca Highney HO! *giggles*
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All we are....is dust in the wind, dude.
-Ted "Theodore" Logan
ten buck says his idea of a "world tour" is as many chucky cheese's and YMCA's he can book...
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Interviewer: You're playing one of the most famous characters in movie history. How come we don't see you in all the tabloids?
Daniel Craig: Because I don't want to be in them.
A World Tour? Is he opening for Shitney?
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
Who wants to bet this world tour never happens? He's too drug addled. That's why his charity single for 9/11 and his charity single for Katrina victims never happened. That's why he loitered with the emir or whatever he was in Dubai, and never recorded anything.
He's done. And MJ might not be dead, but that nose certainly is.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
A WORLD tour? really? Thats strange...
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Happy Holidays