The Church Harlot!!!
When I grow up I want to be the church harlot! This 49-year-old from Jacksonville, FLA is living my dream. Rebecca HanCOCK was ran out of her local church because she's screwing a man she's not married to. Members of Grace Community Church kept harassing her for being a sinful harlot, so she finally left the church. That didn't stop things though! Rebecca received a letter from the pastor of the church, Dr. Christmas, that if she doesn't stop doing the "straight to hell mambo" with her boyfriend, her sins will be announced to the whole church! This sounds like my idea of a good time!
Rebecca said that Dr. Christmas' letter states that on "January 4, my sins will be told to the church, publicly, with my children sitting in the church and my friends." Everybody meet at Grace Church in Jacksonville on January 4th! Sins will be told. I'll provide the holywatertinis.
Rebecca is planning to send a letter to Dr. Christmas to let him know that she is no longer a member of his fun-hating-church. Oh and she should also mention to Dr. Christmas that she just told a local news station that she's blowing her boyfriend (can't you tell from her jaw), so she kind of beat him to the punch.
Real talk: Dr. Christmas asked Rebecca if she'd like to suck on his candy cane and she totally turned him down, so he's sentencing her to hell! I mean, his name is Dr. Christmas. Of course she's going to turn him down.
P.S. - If Rebecca doesn't have business cards printed up with "The Church Harlot" on it, then I'm going to be so mad at her.
VIA Videogum
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Don't forget:
"Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:37
here's the phone number to the church, domain name and his email, pls join me in telling him what a pig he is:
Phone: 904-268-8854
Email: office@gracejax.org
Web: www.gracejax.org
merry xmas clarrisssee!!!!!! ♥♥ U!!!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
i case you're as sickened as i am here's the pastor's home address and phone #::
Christmas, T Scott
10266 Trevor Creek Dr W
Jacksonville, FL 32257-8668
(904) 288-8322
I LOVES YOU CLARISSE!
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Own it like a strap-on.
Submitted by Clarisse on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 4:19pm.
Happy Holidays Clarisse!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Watch out where the huskies go, and don't you eat that yellow snow.
BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, Clarisse!
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed YouTube Gallery
angel!
I'll log on from home! Two weeks with out you crazy people??? Not a chance!!
I am out! Happy Holidays my loves!
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Ein Minuten, bitte. Ich habe einen kleinen Problemo avec diese Religione.
Is this the 17th century? Very lame,I hate religious zealots like this.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
http://www.myspace.com/384080529
Submitted by Clarisse on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 3:43pm.
kdracofan / Happy Hour,
I'm outta here in about 10 minutes and not to return until January 5th!
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Merry Christmas! Happy New Years!
You gotta puter at home or what?;p
♥ ThreadKilla!
A DListed YouTube Gallery
Clarisse: Good for you hun!
I have Thursday & Friday off and then back on the 29th
*Sigh*
holywatertinis you slay me, mk
Submitted by Clarisse on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 3:43pm.
kdracofan / Happy Hour,
I'm outta here in about 10 minutes and not to return until January 5th!
Awwwww.. lucky, Enjoy * Happy Hour is green with envy*
Oh my fucking god!!!!! Who cares?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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"All Those Who Wander Are Not Lost."
I'd rather have incurable cancer than religion.
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.
Surfing the apocalypse.
all the things we have in this world to get in an uproar about, this is not one of them, shit.
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"I'm pretty sure I asked you to pick up some Pecan Sandies."
kdracofan / Happy Hour,
I'm outta here in about 10 minutes and not to return until January 5th!
Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
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Ein Minuten, bitte. Ich habe einen kleinen Problemo avec diese Religione.
Submitted by kdracofan on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 3:38pm.
Happy Hour: You are off tomorrow? Lucky you!
I work until 3pm *sigh*
*sniff sniff*.. nope .. I can't wait for tomorrow to be over so we can have our day off.. Xmas! I work until 2:30 BUT start at 5:00 Zzzzzz
Happy Hour: You are off tomorrow? Lucky you!
I work until 3pm *sigh*
Submitted by Green Is Good on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 3:22pm.
Seems like the appropriate response would be "He that is without sin cast the 1st stone".
Hear! Hear! And speaking of stoning...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_hlMK7tCks
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
"Submitted by HollyG on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 3:12pm.
Applause Papa Smurf! Applause!
My parents have mellowed somewhat in the past couple years, but they did and said enough stupid shit to me growing up that I refuse to ever identify myself as Catholic, even if I kinda, sorta believe some of it. (I have a major beef with a lot of too though) I'm still kinda scared to tell them I am never getting married in a church, nor raising my children to blindly believe that crap. I'm assuming that'll be the final nail in the coffin to disown me?"
If they loved you, they wouldn't disown you. Here's the deal: My Mom still goes to church. She loves it, but she makes up her own mind and thoughts on how she wants to live life. She's living with her boyfriend and doesn't care what anyone thinks. She believes in gay marriage when others at her church don't. Like I said, she makes up her own mind, which I hope - and wish - other church going people would, too. I haven't set foot in a church in, um, 13 years. Aside from two weddings I attended and my Mom is fine with that. I'm sure your parents will be too. It's your life, not theirs. And if they get mad, then they miss out on seeing you happy.
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"Her voice sounds like a goat in heat..." - Balenciaga Bitch on Sarah Palin (10/6/08).
@KDfan
Yes, ready for the game.. but what I am really ready for is for this workday to end!! and tomorrow... lol. I guess I am just ready for a day off.
Thank you for the email address Sheeps. I wrote them a letter, simply saying:
"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.
You people are a disgrace to the Christian faith."
and that was it.
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Michael K > www.winnersusedrugs.com > Perez
WWW.WINNERSUSEDRUGS.COM
who's that hot guy in front of the TV?
--
¿Por Qué No Te Callas?
Happy Hour: LOL hi hun...ready for the game Sunday!?
Clarisse on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 3:07pm.
kdracofan,
IS THIS DAY EVER GOING TO END??????????????????????
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*banging head on desk* NO! APPARENTLY not!
Seems like the appropriate response would be "He that is without sin cast the 1st stone".
What a bunch of asses. Why are they so damn preoccupied with her personal life?
Submitted by kdracofan on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 3:05pm.
LCT: touché
LOL! nice touch...
Well damn. I think I just told what the video said--my bad. This is old news in J'ville.
She actually left the church in August and has since been going to another community church, they just didn't want to let it go. She confided in a church member because she was seeking counseling on what to do and the elder told everyone else. Some of the elder ladies at the church staked out her home overnight, but when she didn't come home, they busted her butt the next day.
Applause Papa Smurf! Applause!
My parents have mellowed somewhat in the past couple years, but they did and said enough stupid shit to me growing up that I refuse to ever identify myself as Catholic, even if I kinda, sorta believe some of it. (I have a major beef with a lot of too though) I'm still kinda scared to tell them I am never getting married in a church, nor raising my children to blindly believe that crap. I'm assuming that'll be the final nail in the coffin to disown me?
"Bitch, please! It's fucking personal!"
"Submitted by MuffinAmy on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 3:00pm.
Oh, and need I remind you bitches that Florida, the Great Meth State, also brought us charming Laterian Milton?
I rest my case about the indefensible State of Florida."
WOOT! My favorite future three striker. God I love that kid!
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"Her voice sounds like a goat in heat..." - Balenciaga Bitch on Sarah Palin (10/6/08).
Jax sure has it's fair share of shit, I can attest to that.
kdracofan,
IS THIS DAY EVER GOING TO END??????????????????????
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Ein Minuten, bitte. Ich habe einen kleinen Problemo avec diese Religione.
TIIIMMMMBBIIIIIITTTTTSSSSSSSSSSSS!
:D :D :D :D :D :D
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Own it like a strap-on.
LCT: touché
Somebody get these bitches to a production of The Crucible.
Actually, this is the kind of shit they did in People's Temple - the church that ended in Jonestown. For reals.
*****
~~not quite a Britaloonie~~
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
"YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE MY NUTS."-ShamWow Vince
i just dont understand whats wrong with people in this state...it honestly seems almost every day theres a story about some idiot in florida breaking the law...yeah i guess all those meth labs in the Ocala national forest probably dont help..and all the sex drugs the old people in the Villages are taking...SERIOUSLY THERE WAS A NEWS REPORT THAT THE WATER IN THE VILLAGES (A VERY LARGE RETIREMENT COMMUNITY ABOUT 30 MINS AWAY FROM ME) WAS CONTAMINATED BECAUSE THE WOMEN WERE FLUSHING THEIR HUSBANDS VIAGRA DOWN THE TOILET SO THEY WOULDNT CHASE THEM AROUND WITH HARD-ONS! UNBELIEVEABLE!! i guess i just dont get people sometimes....
Oh, and need I remind you bitches that Florida, the Great Meth State, also brought us charming Laterian Milton?
I rest my case about the indefensible State of Florida.
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"Edwina's insides were a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase. " -- H.I. McDunnough
Seems to me they should run the pastor out on a rail for blasphemy, seeing how he's named "Christ"mas and all. How egotistical is that? Isn't hubris a sin?
Selective discrimination, it seems to me. Dumbass twats.
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"Edwina's insides were a rocky place where my seed could find no purchase. " -- H.I. McDunnough
What the hell is a "community church" anyway? She should join the real and only Church (Roman Catholic) if she wants solace, forgiveness and PRIVACY.
Say what you want about Catholic priests, they respect the secret of confession and understand the imperfections of the human kind.
Protestants and Mormons are religious quacks.
Cheeky - I'm with ya on shaggin ass outta here. I LIVE in Jax and this place is filled with assholes like this. I feel like an outcast at work because I haven't joined up with the rest of cunty admins' little lunchtime bible groups. Totally makes for a "hostile environment" for me. I come from a Greek Orthodox family but I keep my religious shit (and myself) to myself.
Damn LCT, that's cold of your pops to say that. We should all contribute to a list of the worst things ever said to us by 'Christians'. My personal favourite is from my grandmother one day when I was wearing a shirt that showed a little bit of my stomach:
'God will damn you to hell for walking his Earth looking like a prostitute from Gomorrah'
I told her at least I don't take it up the ass like the ones in Sodom. I think she almost had a heart attack...
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In heaven, all the interesting people are missing.
Hey...since the church harlot has already been done, let us open a Harlot Church!!!!
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Ein Minuten, bitte. Ich habe einen kleinen Problemo avec diese Religione.
snowpiece dont you mean the greediest place on earth? our cheap asses cant afford annual passes to the Magic Kingdom so we had to settle for the Epcot after 4 pass and if i want a croissant and coffee from Paris it costs me $20!!! that mouse can shove his croissants up his fuzzy ass!
Cheeky, it does seem as if FL does have more than its fair share of crazy ass meth heads and hypocritical bible thumpers
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
Interviewer: You're playing one of the most famous characters in movie history. How come we don't see you in all the tabloids?
Daniel Craig: Because I don't want to be in them.
Fuzzy,
PRAYER WARRIORS....*click*click*...COME OUT AND PRAYYYYYYYYYYY!!!
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Ein Minuten, bitte. Ich habe einen kleinen Problemo avec diese Religione.
Submitted by bisou on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 2:48pm.
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on Tue, 12/23/2008 - 2:31pm.
no kidding about judgemental JWs! My grandmother is one...total nightmare.
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Iiiii know eh? My Dad converted to one a few years ago and hooooooooooooooooly fucking shit. The icebreaker was when he said to my formerly Catholic brother and I, "Catholics are fucking idiots" followed by, "I'm not walking you down the aisle."
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Own it like a strap-on.
Dr. Christmas? Sounds like a character from a James Bond movie.
It's unbelievable that with all that is going on in this world: Poverty, hunger, homelessness, crime, etc., that this particular church is concern with the petty shit of this woman. Why don't they go feed the homeless instead?
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Pretty looks fade...dumb is forever -- Judge Judy