Chyna Parties Like It's Her Birthday
That's because it was her birthday. Most of whores like to get completely obliterated on our birfdays, because getting old is pretty gross and depressing. Well, Chyna might have gone a little too far. TMZ says that Chyna was admitted into the hospital yesterday morning, because she over did it with the rubber chicken shots and it didn't mix well with her prescription pills. That's a problem.
Chyna threw a little birthday soiree at her home in Burbank and the paramedics were called at about 5am when friends found her giant ass passed out with cuts on her arms. She was immediately put on a forklift and transported to the hospital. I'm joking about the forklift part. They really used a tractor.
At the hospital, Chyna was so fucking wasted that they couldn't do a proper psych evaluation on her. They had to wait until the bitch sobered up.
Chyna later told TMZ at the hospital that also she wanted was a "hamburger and fries." Straight up, I know what she's talking about. When you're swimming in a big bottle of booze, the only thing you really want is a damn burger and fries. Sometimes you want a taco, but mostly you want burger and fries. Especially some fucking chili cheese fries with extra grease. Shit. Sometimes when I'm drunk I'm tempted just to ask the bitches at McDonald's if I can stick a straw in one of their grease jugs and drink that shit up. Skip the middle man.
You know, I'm going to go ahead and blame all Chyna's troubles on her Little Shop of Horrors clit. If Dr. Drew couldn't even help her ass, then there's a bigger issue here. The bigger issue being her evil roid clit. I bet you it tells her to drink more and to take more pills. It totally talks. Her "feed me" clitoris probably even told her to get it a burger and fries, because it was hungry.
And now I must go and get a burger and fries, because this post made me hungry. I will eat one (or three) for Chyna!
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It might have been a mixture of alcohol and roid rage.
@ Rosemary: love your avy btw :D
and @ Mentirosos: don't get me wrong. I feel you on wanting to smack some reality at Chyna or Chyna types. Seriously, just picture yourself having to live with her even for one week, just sharing a house, not even anything intimate. I'd wanna scream every expletive I know at her and tear her wig off the third time she slit her wrists after drinking the entire mini bar, sheesh
Thanks Sugaroo. Took the words out of my mouth.
lol yeah it is Pearl.
Submitted by mentirosos on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 4:11pm.
To be loved, you have to have something worth loving....
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And you say she doesn't because................?
I mean, do you actually KNOW her? I thought not.
@ Mentirosos: Chyna needs to get the hell out of crazy town. Someone with apparently zero ability to center herself and have some perspective in life has no business in the fame business. She had her glory days; maybe she still can salvage herself and eventually become a fitness expert/teach physical fitness, etc.
Life is a pain in the ass for everyone as it is -- I know from recent experience, had enough contact with unsavory relatives and work acquaintance I usually avoid this Xmas to remind me just how fucked up I could easily choose to be. Enjoy what you can of life; be happy, find something besides getting people to pay attention to you that really revs up your engine every morning -- I know that sounds cheesy, but happiness is really what we're all after when we peel all the layers of everything else on our wish list./off soap box now
Right CTH. Either way you are getting detained and prodded by while you are shitfaced drunk.
Submitted by Sugaroo on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 4:03pm.
I did see her in the Surreal Life and believe all she really does is want to be loved. Unfortunately for her, the type of guys she attracts are not exactly gentlemen.
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To be loved, you have to have something worth loving....
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The past is lost but something might be found to take its place...
Submitted by DeeDee on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 4:10pm.
You know you have a successful birthday party if the ambulance is called to pick you up afterwards.
no, the cops.
that's the shit!
every rager I ever threw back in the day was only good if the cops came.
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"I'm pretty sure I asked you to pick up some Pecan Sandies."
It's ugly sunday at dlist, I see.
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"I'm pretty sure I asked you to pick up some Pecan Sandies."
You know you have a successful birthday party if the ambulance is called to pick you up afterwards.
Submitted by Rosemary on Sun, 12/28/2008 - 3:52pm.
I'm being totally honest when I say i ne ver thought her face was that manly. I'm not just saying that cause i feel bad. When I watched her on the surreal life, and Da Brat kept calling her a man, I thought she didn't look that manly. maybe her body was still roided up some then....but her face didn't look it to me.
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I agree. Madonna's Mum-Ra (thanks, Soul) face is 70 thousand times manlier than Chyna's.
I always imagine Chyna neighing like Jim Carrey's female bodybuilder, Vera de Milo.
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Of the life of Benjamin Button between his twelfth and twenty-first year I intend to say little. Suffice to record that they were years of normal ungrowth.
Chyna is the most desperate, pathetic, non-substance having human being in recorded history. Shes not funny, outrageous, or even crazy....shes just a plain old vapid, humorless dingbat. The only thing she has is thats shes so threw and toredown looking...she needs to have fun with it..play with it, not seem so uptight! That way shed be a lot more personable and interesting...
0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0-o-0
The past is lost but something might be found to take its place...
oy, day of the grotesque
Most of those "prescriptions" you "can't drink " with you can drink with but in years it will maybe hurt your liver or whatever. When I used to drink a lot it never hurt me like at the time to drink with anti depressants . But I'm sure in the long run it wasn't good. I don't drink anymore at all, but I'm just saying that unless she was on something like pain medicine, I doubt it was really her mixing her prescriptions and alcohol.
I did see her in the Surreal Life and believe all she really does is want to be loved. Unfortunately for her, the type of guys she attracts are not exactly gentlemen.
to me, there is something sad and vaguely fragile about her.. ala Marilyn..
seems like she is trapped in a tough exterior, but isn't that way inside. I don't know why.. but I kind of feel sorry for her too... she seems so lost, and while she is rough around the edges... she seems loving and gentle on the inside. I don't know much about her, but that is just the vibe I get. I hope she finds what she is looking for.. and someone who loves her.. and some inner peace. Happy Birthday Chyna.. and Happier ones to come..
I'm sure it was coke or something.
What "prescriptions" is Chyna on, other than steroids? I doubt they're are prescribed by a reputable doctor.
*calling Chyna on the phone*
I'm thinking she went all Incredible Hulk at the hospital and people ran in fear...when her clothing tore around her snatchal area and they saw...the thing...growing between her legs. *shudder*
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
I'm being totally honest when I say i ne ver thought her face was that manly. I'm not just saying that cause i feel bad. When I watched her on the surreal life, and Da Brat kept calling her a man, I thought she didn't look that manly. maybe her body was still roided up some then....but her face didn't look it to me.
I saw that tex
<"You know, I'm going to go ahead and blame all Chyna's troubles on her Little Shop of Horrors clit.">
Well, I read some TMZ posters are naming you by name for driving her to drink on her birthday. MK slays Goliath, you beast.
I feel sorry for Chyna. Being born a man and wanting to be a woman and then becoming one only to have people call you a man must be tough. So would having a really tiny peen and trying to pass it off as a real man in the boat.
Even if the picture was real, which i really doubt, I wish society wasn't so judgemental of stuff like that.
*Hopping in the pinto to go buy Mcdonalds for my hungry clit*
What's perplexing is when she was on that reality show...I forget the name and she acted all 'girly' it just felt so WRONG, her being 'girly' and sounding like a DUDE. I hope she gets off the steroids and hormones. Just be a regular woman if that's what you really are, lady...ummm, errr, dude...ummm....
Poor woman.
Gee, Joe, thanks. Now I can't get the old commercial out of my head!
Hefty! Hefty! Hefty!
I've seen images of her clit. DI-SGUST-TING. This chick is such a DUDE. Sad!
I, too, agree about cheeseburgers and fries. Something about being drunk as Hell and dehydrated than a m.f.er makes you crave a fucking strawberry soda and a greasy cheeseburger and onion rings at 3 o'clock in the morning. LOL.
She's a hefty girl.
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I’ve turned from an ordinary Australian housewife into a gigastar, icon, talk-show host, swami, spin doctor… and now I’m a style guru!
I loved that Chyna's "evil roid clit" was at least circumcised...Photoshop "fuckery"!
*wrestles cats and slaps them on the back of the head*
she had cuts on her arms? that's a way to party!! go chyna...
who's the dude in the photo?
Now, I really do feel sorry for Chyna...she seems really lost and pathetic.
Never mind her dick-clit.
This fug IS a fucking dick in a box!