Hot Slut Of The Day!

Submitted by Condi the ingro... on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 8:00pm.

Damn you to hell!!!! I just moved to TX from CA and I miss the HELL out of Fresh and Easy!!!!

-"Well, should we get more coffee or get two guns and shoot ourselves?"

Yummy

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.

I prefer the Winehouse, which is Gray Goose with tropical fruit juice. Happy new year, fellow bitches!

Submitted by bitchette on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 12:31pm

I know what you mean it's been 80 degrees here (Texas) and it f-cking sucks. Where the hell is winter?

I went to the grocery store last night and they had lined the walls facing the cash registers with bottles and bottles of champagne. Didn't see that Andre stuff but bought some Korbel (Moet was waaayy to expensive, don't they know we're in a recession?) and something called Pink!. Just to make you feel like a poor bastard they put the bottles of Dom and Cristal out too but locked them in these little padlocked refridgerators. Damn HEB they really know how to make you feel bad.

Mikey! I bought a bottle of Italian prosecco at Fresh n' Easy and it was only $4! At that price I can throw the rest down the sink! I hope you visited F&E in Hacienda Heights - it's your kind of place! Feliz Ano Nuevo, dude - you make the world better, and far dirtier.

I've got me two bottles of Martini & Rossi Asti in the fridge. I was never one for champagne - tastes like skunk piss.

I don't know what Melanie MK is talking about, but I'm going to pretend it's me since that's my name and I email him stuff and he never posts it... :(

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Love me or hate me
It's still an obsession
Love me or hate me
That is the question
And if you love me then 'thank you'
And if you hate me then 'f--- you'

I remember Boone's farm when I was in high school. Nasty but it got me drunk.

Now recovered from my Christmas binge, I plan to stick with joints and WORK tomorrow. Going to ring in the New Year alone, decide if AA is worth a shot and resolve to lower my standards where men are concerned so as to not stay a lonely ass spinster forever.

I drank that Andre shit in high school and it was around $2 a bottle!
Happy New Year to MK, you are my the crack to my Wino and I love you!

Happy new year MK. You are so funny. I sent this to my friends and family so they can celebrate Dlisted style.

topanga, drink the oj and alkaseltzer like right before passing out or when exactly?

:)
_____________________________________________

Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke

a message from the Church of the SubGenius

My mouth starting immediately watering at the site of this post. I loves me some cheap wine and champgne. And just a little hang over tid bit...Chug orange juice, or Sunny D, with Alka Seltzer in it, you will be feeling right as rain the next day..=)

*****"Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers."*****

Submitted by luscious_t on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 11:18am
That's funny because I do the same thing. I drink expensive ass micro brew beer and then cheap champagne and wine. I figure the wine is cheaper in Cali cause Napa Valley is right there, but that is just my way of telling myself that it's ok to spend $5-7 on a bottle of wine.

Submitted by bitchette on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 12:31pm.

I'm with you bitchette! I really need to stop living paycheck to paycheck and stop taking payday loans, which has left me broke and stupid.

I hope next year will be much better than last year. At least that fucker, George W., will be gone. I'm no fan of Obama, but at least that evil ass Cheney and his lapdog, Georgie will be outta there and hopefully looking at criminal charges for driving this country into the ground.

~sigh~ I think I need two bottles of Andre Cold Duck!

HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYONE!

omg i love this stuff. I just bought two bottles tonight for $3 a piece. Can't get better than that.

I just now bought a bottle of the pink Andre at Wal-Mart for 4 bucks. I'm going to be a cheap drunk tonight. It's in the fridge cooling right now.

I prefer Ballatore Gran Spumante. Still cheap as hell but it tastes like alcoholic soda... delicioso! Still don't know what I'm doing tonight, just getting stoned for now :)

Happy New Year's!

ETA: Bitchette: I hear that. Hope it gets better for all of us.

i've got a bottle cooling in the fridge.

happy new year everyone!

Submitted by ocd can be good on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 12:06pm.
@ lizzieb. Best of luck to you. High rates of stress, depression, PTSD, problems due to shift work, etc. I hope 2009 has you finding a much more enjoyable line of employment.

Thank you that's very kind. Happy 2009 to you and all the funny people on this site.

Edited to add @Bitchette- yep this year has sucked monkey balls. Let's hope 2009 is much better.

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The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

i hadn't even really realized that it is new years eve.

christmas was a huge let down as well so i've been pretending that its any old spring time week (except i'm not doing any work- its the holidays, how convenient). spring time because its fucking 65 degrees here (NC) and the birds are fucking chirping. i know everybody's complaining about the cold and snow but i really miss it.

but thank you for reminding me! i will rush out after work to buy some andre and orange juice (i've got some vodka at home so it goes both ways :) ) with my last $5.

my new years resolution is to stop living paycheck to paycheck, or rather 3 days after my paycheck to my next paycheck. is life sucking for anyone else right now?? my fiancee got laid off like 3 months ago and has not been able to get any work to speak of.

Good think i'm drinking tonite!!! Happy Fucking New Year!! Yay for our new Pres!!

Andre is 3.99 a bottle here in the stores...but I have to admit that I really like their pink champagne. Drank the pink stuff at a wedding once and thought it was delicious....when I found out it was cheap-ol Andre...i was pleasantly surprised! :D

Happy New Year bitches!! MUAH!

^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^<>^
All we are....is dust in the wind, dude.

-Ted "Theodore" Logan

one new year's I vowed to drink ONLY champagne. oh my god. I haven't been much or a drinker since the worst hangover evah!! this year i'm staying home sick. :( I trust the dlisted horz can drink my share! :)

happy new year everyone! :)

@ lizzieb. Best of luck to you. High rates of stress, depression, PTSD, problems due to shift work, etc. I hope 2009 has you finding a much more enjoyable line of employment.

HAHAHA that is what my parents drink!

I, on the other hand, with be getting sloshed with a lovely six pack of King Cobra I purchased from a liquor store/deli in the Bronx during my recent visit to NY.

Great taste in booze runs in the family =P

Happy fuckin New year MK. I've never had Andre so whatever. I don't care for taste I just want to forget.

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We worship a dancing peanut, for corn’s sake!

Submitted by TITS on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 11:50am.
Submitted by Afire Cracker on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 11:04am.
So my folks went on a trip to france and brought back many kinds of champagne. They had party with a blind tasting and judging for friends. They also included Andres for fun and that shit won.
*

I suspect what happened was that they were unaccustomed to the "dryness" of the champagne (French champagne is a tautological expression, like widow woman).

I'm alergic to alcohol.
Epic Fail.

I used to drink Andre Cold Duck, and I am still alive to tell the tale!

Happy New Year everybody!

Submitted by Afire Cracker on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 11:04am.
So my folks went on a trip to france and brought back many kinds of champagne. They had party with a blind tasting and judging for friends. They also included Andres for fun and that shit won.
*

HAHAHHAHA beautiful! That has got to burn the asses of the wine snobs.

Burn you pretentious twits BURN.

Submitted by Afire Cracker on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 11:04am.
So my folks went on a trip to france and brought back many kinds of champagne. They had party with a blind tasting and judging for friends. They also included Andres for fun and that shit won.

Hmmmm. An expensive champs is like ambrosia; Andre is like bubbly sugar water.

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Nothing is more hopeless than a scheme of merriment. (SJ)

fuck the champagne..... I'm Colombian and aguardiente is the way to go.

Happy New Year!!!!

Submitted by Migraine Sally on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 11:25am.
Mr. Sally used Asti Spumante to seduce me in college
********
That is *so* cute.

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I’ve turned from an ordinary Australian housewife into a gigastar, icon, talk-show host, swami, spin doctor… and now I’m a style guru!

My resolution is to not use the word "Canoodle" or comment when MichaelK uses it.

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We drank a toast to innocence
We drank a toast to time
Reliving in our eloquence
Another auld lang syne...

Oh, lizardbits, the Gerard Butler you see in the tabs is merely a Doppelganger to fool the public. I have the real one. Trust me on this.

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You better watch out, you better not cry.

Hillbilly Champagne:

6 pack of Ginger Ale
1 large can of Hawaiian Fruit Punch
1 bottle of Boones Farm Strawberry Hill

Mix in a metal bucket and drink.

Submitted by kittiesandbubbles on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 10:27am.
Does anyone have a New Years Resolution?

Having left the criminal justice system for the sake of my mental health, mine is to get a new job and move on. My bank and mortgage company is very keen on the new job part,as are Barclaycard.

I am also going to try and be a bit healthier and avoid people who get on my bloody nerves.

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The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 11:18am.

So if you have Gerard Butler in your basement, who is that guy who is licking Paris's crab infested bush? Did you make a deal with Tommygirl?

Mr. Sally used Asti Spumante to seduce me in college

☻ I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints. The sinners are much more fun ☻

OH MY GOD!!!
When I was a kid, my folks would buy Andre Cold Duck (a cheap bubbly rosé) and they would let me have a sip. It was the highlight of the holidays for me.

I loved that cheap crap and I should try to find myself a bottle. I doubt if they have it in my fancy Upper West Side neighborhood, so I might have to take a trip up to da 'hood to get me a bottle. Usually, it's 3 bottles for $10! What a steal! *LOL*

Once again, Michael K, you have proved yourself to the coolest hot piece of mess out there!

I have to say, I lurve champagne. The bubbles tickle my nose and make me giggle.

My new year's resolution is to stop chaining Gerard Butler to a radiator in my basement and forcing him to comply with my sexual demands, but every year I fail miserably.

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You better watch out, you better not cry.

I fucking love Andre!!! Although, I prefer the spumante or the pink. I drink expensive imported beer and cheap wine - what can I say? haha I'm a stupid weird American.

You know what makes it *really* good, though? I drink mine in a dacquri glass and I "muddle" fresh fruit in the bottom (raspberries, blackberries, or pomegranate), pour, and top with a few whole berries. mmmmmm yummers

*****
~~not quite a Britaloonie~~
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
"YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE MY NUTS."-ShamWow Vince

Submitted by Afire Cracker on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 11:04am.
So my folks went on a trip to france and brought back many kinds of champagne. They had party with a blind tasting and judging for friends. They also included Andres for fun and that shit won. And France surrendered...

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hahahahaaaaha! things that you have to develop a tasate for usually don't taste that good

;)

.

Submitted by kittiesandbubbles on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 10:27am.
Does anyone have a New Years Resolution?

I'm actually considering ending my almost three years of celibacy and starting to date again. Or at least (and more likely) fuck around.

New Year's Resolutions...

Considering I survived this long, I feel I am already ahead of the curve, just know, we are all doing it and working it out everyday.

Cheers ya' Hwores.

"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!

So my folks went on a trip to france and brought back many kinds of champagne. They had party with a blind tasting and judging for friends. They also included Andres for fun and that shit won. And France surrendered...

My New Year's Resolution every damn year is....
Get in shape, get healthy...

Whatever.

This year, it's...
Simplify my life. Dump all the old crap (including thoughts, actions, and people that bring me down).

Submitted by Hysteria on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 10:59am.

Andre is Cold Duck, isn't it? it's all good :)
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++'

Dunno. I thought they were different. The Cold Duck is dark, isn't it?

Andre is Cold Duck, isn't it? it's all good :)

∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞

HaafY NeW BEeRs!

¦D

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Submitted by kittiesandbubbles on Wed, 12/31/2008 - 10:27am.
Does anyone have a New Years Resolution?
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Pay off my bills and learn to be more patient. Oh and get some!

It's New Year's so let's pass the bottle and twist the cap.