Friday, January 2nd 2009

Blind Items: I Guess, You Guess

Which newly married starlet gave a guy she trysted with a nasty STD right before her wedding? (Page Six)

ScarHooooo? But what kind of gift does ScarJo give? She looks like a herp kind of girl.

Which on-the-rocks couple have been headed for divorce for a while? The rock star was cheating on his actress wife immediately after they got hitched and has been carrying on with his comely female sound technician. (Page Six)

The word comely never sounds like a good thing to me. My guess is an obvious one: Fishsticks and Cunt Martin?

Which television actor should ask his new fling for her secret photo album? While she was in college, she took some nude pictures that are floating around the hard drives of local frat houses. Somehow, we don't think the actor will be turned off. (Page Six)

TV dude who loves the skanks? Has to be The Piv?

Which TV actor didn’t realize who he was kissing? This handsome guy walked into a bar on New Year’s Eve and started hitting on a beautiful girl. The two got kissy very quickly. His friends finally arrived, and one of them pulled him aside and whispered in his ear that the girl was actually a very beautiful and very feminine transvestite. The actor turned red, was heard shouting “No f* way!”, and left immediately. In his rush, he left his cell phone behind, which he sheepishly had to pick it up at the tranny’s home the next day. (Blind Gossip)

See above.

This celebrity couple looks stable from the outside, but from the inside, it’s a mess, and their relationship will certainly end in 2009. She is doing all the work trying to save their relationship, and has enrolled them in couples therapy. Her significant other, however, doesn’t even show up half the time, claiming that work commitments prevent him from doing so. However, he does seem to have plenty of time to travel for fun and play games and run around with his friends. Besides, why should he bother trying to save this relationship when a past girlfriend - about whom he was totally crazy - may soon be back on the market? (Blind Gossip)

Sydney Bristow and Ben Affleck. He has his choice of two ex-girlfriends who will soon be available: JLo and Fishy.

Posted by: Michael K


Hekki's picture

Agree with all your guesses, MK. Oh, except for the Piv for the tranny kisser, because he is not handsome.

ScarJo should not have gotten married. Way too young and sexy. She should be out there ho'ing like crazy (like she used to) until she's at least 30.

And Jennifer Garner is misguided (putting it nicely), because most women learn after a certain age realize that men like him can't be trnasformed into husband material.