You'll Have To Wait A Little Longer To Marry Gary Oldman
That's because he just got married for the fourth time in Santa Barbara last week. Don't stick your head in the oven just yet, because this bitch's marriages never last longer than a quick minute. Go tap your crotch to your personal favorite Oldman movie (mine is Prick Up Your Ears) and by the time you're finished, the ink on his divorce papers will be dry. That's how he does it.
50-year-old Gary married 31-year-old jazz singer Alexandra Edenborough in a teeny tiny ceremony last week. His agent confirmed this shit, because he was Gary's best man. This is the fourth time Gary has locked a ball and chain to his ankle. His longest marriage lasted four years. His marriage to Uma Thurman was canceled before their 2-year anniversary.
So, yeah, Alexandra better get to fucking work! She doesn't have much time before Gary quits her ass, so she better start massaging those tired spermies out of his pepaw peen. Put a little speed in his dick hole, so his jizz fishies swim faster! Get that money before it shuffles off!
And with his whiskers and her eyes, they will have purdy kids. Gary really does have amazing whiskers. That's how he gets all the ladies. It adds an extra tickle.
"Submitted by Clarisse on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 3:40pm.
On topic:
Am I the only one who LOVED Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead?"
OMG I wanted to snatch him up and run away with him!
And fuck his discoveries that only worked when no one else was around. I felt so bad for his character.
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Are you gonna bark all day, little doggie, or are you you gonna bite?
Uma was married to Oldman? Uma Oldman? Ooohhhhh I LIKE that.
-Einah
I LOVED Sid & Nancy
literarylioness,
Good point!
On topic:
Am I the only one who LOVED Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead??
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZfcKGjhLs0&feature=related
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... so I threw my breasts out of the window of my Lamborghini!
OH! How did I forget. LOVED him as Luduig Beethoven in "Immortal Beloved".
I absolutely LOVE that movie.
I just LOVE Gary Oldman! I will be his next wife! Trust.
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Let me dirty up your mind.
Gary was amazing in the Sid and Nancy biopic. Also, his sis (Laila Morse?) is fantastic on the Britsoap called EastEnders.
"Althought why he is in that POS The Unborn is beyond me."
You answered your own question. Gary O is getting all the press for that movie. Gary is an amazing actor, but is not the best in choosing his roles.
I would appreciate his peepaw ween. He's a great actor and probably has millions. I totally believe marrying rich solves EVERYTHING! Golddiggaz UNITE!
http://ginarivera.typepad.com/ginasrant/
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 12:32pm.
Every time Mickey Rooney got married he said something like "She's the one," or I've finally found the woman of my dreams,"
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Love Drew Barrymore but this shit reminds me of her too.
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Wendy? Darling? LIGHT OF MY LIFE.
I am in love with this man. I just want everyone to know this.
Oh, oh, also, I just saw a movie with Terrence Howard in it for the first time!
Mmmm... I even was able to put the babywipes thing out of my mind for most of the film.
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"You can get it doggy-style or you can get it laying on your side. Those are your only choices. This is my house and I get the say."
Gary has 3 sons, 1 by the first wife, 2 by the 3rd. His longest marriage was 4 years, the others were 1 & 2 years long. He was also engaged to Isabella Rossellini for about a year but never made it to the alter. OK someone needs to give him some sound advice on him getting married: STOOOP YOUR NO GOOD AT THIS! Damn man ever heard of just dating?
Sorry, but she's meant to be 31???
"...but the figure in question had out-Heroded Herod, and gone beyond the bounds of even the prince's indefinite decorum." -Poe
He is gorgeous!My fav movies of his are Dracula and Sid and Nancy.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
@ snowpiece: uh oh, true, Joe is about 10- 8 years older than Gary, right? Yeah, I just think the older we get, 10 years is nothing.
Like someone who's 90 has a lot in common with someone who's a 100; as opposed to someone who's 10 with someone who's 20.
@ Clarisse: you and Deb guessed exactly the same person :D
I'll give, there's a resemblance :)
He must have a huge filing cabinet labeled PRENUPS.
Every time Mickey Rooney got married he said something like "She's the one," or I've finally found the woman of my dreams," or some such poppycock drivel. When he married the last and eighth wife she said "Oh, the others just didn't understand him."
-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
If you think I'm gonna fall for this anymore
Everybody say no no no no no
@Candy,
wimmens, you always think the girl will clean the guy out. Gary's a pro at this, he's been around the block a few. you're just wishful thinking.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41APzy5kqBU
literarylioness,
Maybe I'm just partial, but I don't imagine Gary Oldman needs a quickie marriage stunt for PR. Althought why he is in that POS The Unborn is beyond me.
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... so I threw my breasts out of the window of my Lamborghini!
Finally, a Gary Oldman post! Except, you got it wrong MK, this should be a HSOTD post. Pffft.
Gary can do no wrong in my book.
He was excellent as Sid, and specfuckingtacular in "The Professional" aka "Leon".
Isn't it convenient Gary O gets married right before his movie comes out? The Unborn is coming out January 9, so I guess this "bride" will last until it goes to DVD by March. Just in time for Gary O's 51st birthday! I loved him as Dracula. Sources on that set said he was doing "sexy times" with Wanna Ride Her and whatever he did freaked her out BIG TIME.
Hey, I guess you are right. As long as he doesn't mind filing for bankruptcy after she cleans him out, why not?
yes! i couldn't remember the name of that movie!
i loved the scene in the bar when they tried to smooth out a dispute between the italians and gary's character. everything was settled and gary just said fuckit and went back and shot them anyway. great movie.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41APzy5kqBU
have you all seen State of Grace? If not you should, it's with Gary, Ed Harris, and Sean Penn.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
Submitted by CandyCanze on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 11:34am.
Aw hon, don't you know some men know that and do it anyway? It's too too true.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41APzy5kqBU
Sibsi I KNEW IT and I was ready to give you a scoldin' seeing he'd be like 60 or so by now, if only, but I see you made my point!
♥
****************************1/20/09
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
Sibsi!!
I thought it was Scott Weiland!!!
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... so I threw my breasts out of the window of my Lamborghini!
I was just going to say that GIG. Gary is hot in that movie! So is Jean Reno. Mmmmm, Jean Reno........ *drooling*
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 11:29am.
Sibsi who is in your avie?
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That's the lovely Joe Strummer!
Now it's sad to think he's gone, given that he'd not be that much older than Gary were he still alive :(
Sorry, having a weird morning today! Going from happy to sad every other minute. Where are mah meds??!!!
Gary was scary in "The Professional". I freaking LOVE that movie.
Yeh, I mean jebuz! He's 50! Get the walker out GrandPa!
Shut-up a you face!!
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... so I threw my breasts out of the window of my Lamborghini!
hold up now, it's gary freaking Oldman, not Heff we are talking about here. ****************************1/20/09
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
Oh my! What a lovely daughter you have there. *ring* *ring* Grandma called. She wants her husband back. Oh wait! Im sorry Grandma. He married his daughter. Grooosss!
He's got SLEAZE face written all over him and she's hungry for some attention. It will not last.
Men will never learn. With an age difference like that, she only wants your money douchebag. Barf!
Ah, Gary you lucky mofo. I'm soooo jealous of him, he's done it with two of the most beautiful woman ever to grace print IMO; Uma Thurman and Isabella Rossellini. Dude's got charisma.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41APzy5kqBU
Submitted by Sheeps: "I know! This also violates my two-divorces-and-sit-down rule."
Good rule.
Good point re her make up- James Haven needs to give her the old Mary Kay once over.
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If you can't be a good example, be a horrible warning. I'm talking to you actually.
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 11:18am.
When my son was little he asked if we had colour telly when I was a kid. I said yes but the dinosuars kept breaking it- I found out later that for about a year he thought that was true. My youngest asked if aeroplanes had bene invented when I was a kid- it's a bit worrying really. I agree about it all being tiring but I am not sure if that is aging, parenthood or both!!
I am of course biased re Mr Oldman- not many successful people come out of Catford!
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If you can't be a good example, be a horrible warning. I'm talking to you actually.
Sibsi who is in your avie?
****************************1/20/09
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 11:20am.
I know! This also violates my two-divorces-and-sit-down rule.
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Wow, this is graphic.
Submitted by luscious_t on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 10:55am.
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That is a plausible explanation.
I still feel like I am the only one who doesn't think he's hot.
Correction, maybe I would, if he wasn't so old relative to my own age!
Angel, that's pretty funny about your daughter. To be 10'ish again, and think someone in their 20's, 30's is so freakin' old!
Submitted by Sheeps on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 11:15am.
Look who's calling someone else "sheepish".
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
31? Girlfriend needs to lay off the makeup or something.
Yeah Gary is the hotness, especially in Dracula (well as hot Dracula, not so much the old one.) Although ever since I watched this movie, "Tiptoes" now I kinda always see him as his little person character. Yeah, a movie where Gary Oldman spends the entire time on his knees.
Submitted by Sheeps on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 11:15am.
Someone I know was getting married for the third time. He said, sheepishly, "I guess I'm just the marrying type." A friend said, "No, you're not; you're the divorcing type."
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LOL! Well you can't divorced if you don't get married, you know!
♥ ThreadKilla!
Five Famous People I Would Invite To Dinner
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
Submitted by lizzieb on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 11:13am.
Brad is aging in dog years, I swear a few more adoptions/ IVF efforts and even Woody Allen will be calling him old.
Gary Oldman
comes from the same part of London as me. He is not old and the hotness, the end.
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Agreed on Brad. But I don't know about Gary (aside from the hotness)...it's a little bit perspective, yes?
My kid hit me with two great lines yesterday:
after counting on her fingers..."It seems like YOU're getting older way faster than I am!"
and
"How does it feel to be alive for SOOOO LONG?"
My answer:
"Tiring."
♥ ThreadKilla!
Five Famous People I Would Invite To Dinner
It might seem like I'm stalking you. I'm not.
You just go on about your business:)
I looooved Prick Up Your Ears, but I have to say mine is Sid & Nancy.
I liked "Meet Joe Dirt" too, but I'm not adopting David Spade's hairstyle.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Someone I know was getting married for the third time. He said, sheepishly, "I guess I'm just the marrying type." A friend said, "No, you're not; you're the divorcing type."
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Wow, this is graphic.
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 10:17am.
Submitted by bisou on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 10:08am.
At what point does one become a pepaw/memaw?
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I think it varies. It's whenever one gets hit with the old guy stick....I'd say he's got enough gray and wrinkles to qualify...
Brad's almost there too...
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Brad is aging in dog years, I swear a few more adoptions/ IVF efforts and even Woody Allen will be calling him old.
Gary Oldman comes from the same part of London as me. He is not old and the hotness, the end.
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If you can't be a good example, be a horrible warning. I'm talking to you actually.
gary is hot, but creeeeeepy.
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Submitted by parissucksliterally :got an excuse for Port-au-Prince? Can you even tell me where it is without Googling it?
Submitted by carebearloves on Tue, 12/30/2008 - 5:46pm.
its a person from france.
Gia,
I believe he has one son.
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... so I threw my breasts out of the window of my Lamborghini!