Rock Of Love Bus: This Shit Is A Mess
I knew the first episode of Rock of Love Bus would make me feel like I needed Jesus in my life, but this shit exceeded my expectations. What...the fuck? After watching it, my saliva tasted like Boones-Farm-infused vomit, my crotch started itching like vag warts were starting to grow in and I had to look down at myself to make sure extra-large Hefty bags filled with melted down plastic weren't taking up space in my chest area. Seriously, it felt like the high level of skankness on the TV screen exploded all over me. I had to ask God to forgive me for my sins. During next week's episode, I'm going to wear a dental dam over my nose and mouth to protect myself.
I wish I had one last night while watching the moment above. Now, I consider myself highly knowledgeable when it comes to all things whorish, but this shit even blew my mind. Nikki, the ladyboy muppet, was "freakin' horny" so she decided to do a Buttery Nipple shot out of Gia's pussy right on the bar in front of everyone! I bet it tasted like an oatmeal cookie, because you know that dirty bitch Gia had yeast infection leakage.
Nikki is taking the whole "nasty slut with no self-respect" thing to levels beyond my imagination. She truly is my idol. Unfortunately, the only open vagina Vh1 is allowed to show is Bret Michaels' face, so they had to censor the whole amazing moment. And that bitch Heather falling on her ass at the end completes the clip.
It wouldn't be a Rock of Love episode without a good skankfight! This one below comes courtesy of the Brazilian drunk Marcia and the Juliette Lewis wannabe Ashley. It all started when Ashley made fun of Marcia's accent on the bus. When Marcia got a few gallons of tequila in her, she got revenge by throwing chips at Ashley and then choking her chicken neck! And Ashley totally fucking screams like a damn chicken getting finger fucked. I don't blame Marcia. I would've done that long before, because Ashley's voice is so damn irritating. She sounds like she's talking with a dick stuck in the side of her mouth. Open your mouth, bitch!
Even though that whole episode made me cleans out my genitals with OxiClean (and I mean that as a compliment), I'm still mad that they got rid of Nikki so soon. I mean, the ho did a shot out of another chick's coochie in the first episode! She would've been mixing martinis in her own poon by episode 3! Extra dirty with two crotch olives. Aw. What could've been....
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Rock Of Love Casting Department, you deserve a fucking Oscar for season 3. This is better than when that girl shit on the floor the first episode of Flavor Of Love.
Hi Miss Priss!
I mean, I am no prude but this is too low. Yuck!
Nothing says Klassy like taking a shot out of a STD ridden cooter
Yum!
I FUCKING LOVE THIS SHOW!
I was amazed last night. I didnt even flip channels on the commercials cause I didnt want to miss any of it.
this shit is fucking gold!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Submitted by Sandbitch on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 4:09pm.
Pack them in a crate, drop them off in Iraq. Men there will think they've died and gone to heaven.
<<<
I think the Muslim men think their heavenly reward is 100 virgins.
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He has seriously gone off the reservation.--callan
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 4:06pm.
Diego : I'm still trying to understand, was there a shotglass involved?
Was there a felching thing involved?
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He has seriously gone off the reservation.--callan
Submitted by madam s. on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 4:02pm.
And I'm with you guys in being confused about how one would go about doing (or offering) a "lady shot" as we'll call it.
===A straw perhaps?
They ain't no Housewives of Atlanta that's fersure.
Pack them in a crate, drop them off in Iraq. Men there will think they've died and gone to heaven.
great. Now i'm gonna have to change my name....
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i not comprehending any of this, and i'm ok with that
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Diego : I'm still trying to understand, was there a shotglass involved?
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
Skank is the nicest thing anyone can say in this case. But leave out the "dumb blonde" -- there are no natural blondes here.
these bitches are the grossest bunch ive seen so far..that muppet chick scared the shit out of me and my husband when we were watching...it was pretty hilarious that most of the skanky blonds ended up on a bus together and all the "boring" other chicks got the other bus..i liked when they were singing KUMBAYA..LMAO!! oh and we also noticed Bret's new "barbie hair" weave...haha he should be able to afford some quality polyester hair by now...
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 3:52pm.
Does she not look just like a trashy Paris Hilton? And fuck her for making me imply there is actually something more repulsive than Paris Hilton.
I'm still confused about the shot. I know he made that comment about alcohol killing germs which I found to be hilarious. Like he hasn't licked snatch that's way worse than that. Then he freaked out about the herpes paper. Since when is this douchebag so precious? We all know he has a standing order for Valtrex.
"I love my tail in these jeans!"
Those are some of the raggediest hos I have ever seen. I guess this season is going to be about out triflin' each other; homegirl has already set the bar pretty high. I call obvious bullshit on Brett being offended by the coochie shooter.
And I'm with you guys in being confused about how one would go about doing (or offering) a "lady shot" as we'll call it.
This is just too much. No wonder Muslims think Americans are the devil.
Ugh.
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He has seriously gone off the reservation.--callan
Who bred these shoddy slatterns?
SHARRRON SHARRRRON SHARRRRON SHARRRRON
I've never seen this show but I have to admit it seems hilarious. I love the fact that Bret Michaels appears to be the most demure lady in the house. I also love that I mostly cannot tell a single one of them apart, including Bret.
Ok, I'm seriously confused. Did she pour the shot into her vag and drink it out? Or did she just hold the shot glass with her vag? Either way that is so beyond the line of skankiness. Is that a word? lol It is now :)
these are the nastiest skanks i've ever witnessed...
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certified in knocking dicks outta mouths...
I think she tried to make a "test tube" baby if you know what I mean>>?!?!? Thats how she did the shot.
This season basically just transended all previuosly filth skank STD trash TV be have already seen. If this is the way 2009 is starting we have a great year of TV coming. BTW DJ Lady Tribe is an actual paid DJ who is kind of famous in the trashy club scene around LA.
This is so far over the skank meter it's unbelievable.
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"Money is the magic wand that turns many a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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Submitted by TOPANGA on Mon, 01/05/2009 - 3:50pm.
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First off, I had no idea what happened, so thanks for clarifying the contents of that video for me without the use of MK's really complex slang, haha. As funny as MK is, I sometimes don't understand what he's saying.
Anyways, that's really repulsive. Why do they even call this love any more? I like MK's title better. I feel like I contracted 10 STDs on my eyes just by watching this. I can semi-understand doing this, but on camera? Gawd, what if some of these trannies have kids that watch this?
........
Fer sure maybe, fer sure not, fer sure eh, fer sure bomb...
Submitted by Keane on Sun, 12/14/2008 - 3:41pm.
If only his mind was as quick as his reflexes, the world would be a much safer place.
Happy Hour, HI!!
Yep, me neither. I refuse to click.
I wish I could stand watching these women(???) humiliate themselves on TV, but I can't. I simply can't =(
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You got your problems, I got my hash pipe
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ba_NNKyUwEE
"Bench sucking is only for after midnight. Dumb blue motherfucker!" MK 12.30.08
I think you have to give Marcia at least a little bit of credit for being able to all those stank blonds apart.
I watched this shitshow last night. Was it just me, or was Bret Michaels' weave looking extra luxurious? Also, I'm always surprised how they can find uglier/skankier chicks than the ones in the previous season. That HAS to take effort.
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How can you thank God for a song that the Devil helped you write?
Nope, I am not going to clik.. Oh My Lord what has our entertaiment come down to?
Diego "That damn tattooed Paris Hilton chick is terrifying. "
ahahahahhahahahahaha
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
OH. MY. GOD!
"Suicide hotline, please hold"
Ummm, I maybe my mind isn't as dirty or imaginative as others...but exactly how does one take a shot from another woman's vagina?!Obviously it's possible...
*****"Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise? OK, now everybody take some rubbers."*****
damn MK why'd they get rid of her? she was awesome.
I LMAO when that girl busted her ass.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
Is that what that bitch did? I couldn't figure out what went down for the life of me, but maybe I was just horrified and trying to block it out. I still don't understand how that works. Call me blissfully ignorant, but seriously? How?
I already fucking love Marcia. That damn tattooed Paris Hilton chick is terrifying. And I really hate that he proves every piece of advice my grandmother ever gave my sisters and cousins right. He always picks the least skanky one in the house when it's all said and done.
"I love my tail in these jeans!"
"You do not waste alcohold like that. That is not cool!"
LMAO!
And what the fuck? I know the blonde monster thing doing the pussy shots is a skank, but who the fuck is the whore open her vag lips on a bar for a shot glass????
Lord, I can't help it this shit is my guilty pleasure. I love seeing woman like this they don't make me feel bad that I'm a flat chested, frizzy hair, glass wearin', sweat pant wearin', dork.
We worship a dancing peanut for corn’s sake!