Wednesday, January 7th 2009
Hot Slut Of The Day!
George Kistner - Are you over the age of 18? Do you live in Louisville, KY? Is your vagina clean and wart free? Do you not have a man? Are you really fucking desperate? If the answer is yes to all those questions, then I have the "free face" for you! George Kistner has a website offering to suck the poon of any ladies who meet his requirements. HA. Yes, he has requirements. And he's also an Ordained Minister of the Universal Life Church! So you will be getting a holy experience.
Click here to visit his site to read his terms, learn more about him and apply (you know you want to). Shit. I'd sit on his face just to cover it up.
For Elle
DOES NOT WANT
you know it's bad when you must decline free oral sex...but like this dude said, restrictions apply!
there really is one time I need a douche near my vajayjay, okay?
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Submitted by MrPossumsMama on Thu, 01/08/2009 - 12:18am.
Vote for MK - he's coming in 2nd by only like 1000 votes:
http://2008.weblogawards.org/polls/best-gossip-blog/
Polls close Feb 13
Ewwww he is fucking gross. He goes down on chick on their rag if he has a relationship with them. Can you fucking imagine how gory that would look if some dude was all eating your panocha and looked at you with all the blood all over his mouth. OMFG QUE ASCO!!!!!
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LOL...he's standing in front of a church!
ΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨΨ
Skanky whores always think that looking sexy means looking like you're getting double-penetrated. -Michael K
Fuck yeah! Louisville, represent! (Seriously, all the guys in Louisville are like this.)
damn...free oral sex!
and here I was all this time paying for it like a sucker...
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"Hasta la bye bye!"
My cat is a minister with the Universal Life Church (and has been for about eight years) and he's shocked that a fellow minister would bring shame to the ministry like this. Shocked, I say!
Ewwwwwwwww. can we say L O S E R ?
lol you know he is probably the pool boy for that nice house he is standing in front of.
I can't believe this guy keeps showing up everywhere. I'm in Louisville, and met him at a friend's Halloween party. He's creepy as fuck.
Oh my...he's interested in Satanism according to his My Space page.
All the fat goth chicks in Louisville will be applying. That's probably his type anyways because he says 'Some people say that I have weird tastes'. Why is that the fattest grossest fat girls become goth? And they always seem to have boyfriends that aren't that bad looking. What's up with that? Is it because fat girls will let guys do anything to them because they're so desperate?
I am soooooooooooo sorry that I clicked the link. I am totally depressed now.
Submitted by Madam Pince on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 4:18pm.
I never can get over how ugly men demand sexy times with attractive women.
They've seen too many Jude Apatow movies.
Submitted by Madam Pince on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 4:18pm.
You said it, sister.
What cracked me up was under his "terms" he insists on cleanliness. he says, "If I can't breath (sic), I cannot help you."
Ahahahaha!!
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Don't you just love public humiliation when it doesn't happen to you? It's truly what makes the world go round.--MK
Submitted by emphamiz502 on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 6:45pm.
For reals. He wanted to measure your pi with his protractor.
Gross out.
He is FUG.
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Don't you just love public humiliation when it doesn't happen to you? It's truly what makes the world go round.--MK
Ick. Ick. Ick. I need to wash my eyes out with bleach.
I am wondering if his sword collection is in the custody of the LPD. His my space says he just got out of the half way house.
Elle
Oh wow!, the sad thing is I know this guy, he is a math tutor at a community college. He seemed really nice to me, went out of his way to wave at me in the hallways was always asking if I needed help in math, yeah, I know why now.
My ex used to have a friend who probably ended up like this guy. It's not him, though. I do live in Louisville, but thank God I don't know this guy. Even if the oral sex part is a joke page, he's obviously a "different" sort of fellow.
Hmm...I got some restrictions too.
They include things like this ;/
♥ ThreadKilla!
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VOTE FOR MK!
also, what is it with dudes who have facial hair loving to munch box? ive heard of this phenomenon before and its just... you know?
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backseat.tumblr.com
Submitted by grapedrinkbaby on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 10:22am.
I just had to use my asthma inhaler.
you just said that.
Yeesh. Chicks would actually let this near their lady parts? Sorry, man. Not that desperate to be eaten out.
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I have a delivery from Mr....Mop.
"Submitted by Stan Hooper on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 10:52am.
I think Ann may be tempted to take this fucker's offer."
But he insists on "attractive" women. Also, Ann is a man, baby!
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"Now is not the time for my fuckery."
http://girlandherbooks.blogspot.com/
http://dumb-report.blogspot.com
I never can get over how ugly men demand sexy times with attractive women.
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"Now is not the time for my fuckery."
http://girlandherbooks.blogspot.com/
http://dumb-report.blogspot.com
OMG, he has an IQ? WTF?? i have to agree with SueCalico...someone hates him & this is some elaborate twisted joke...this person cannot be for real...i have heard of men who have this fetish, but to go to these lengths it would be too powerful for him to have any criteria that needed to be filled...with a fetish like this anyone would do, he wouldnt dare be so fussy. well, i dont think he would anyway.
Submitted by SueCalico on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 1:21pm.
I refuse to believe this is real. I bet someone who used to be friends with him, but now hates him, did this. They took his pictures, made up this web page and voila--instant humiliation. This is what I need to believe in order to preserve my sanity. Because if this is real....there are no words.
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You rang? LOL
Seriously, this isn't real, people. It is either a big joke, or like SueCalico says, some former GF trying to burn his ass.
I refuse to believe this is real. I bet someone who used to be friends with him, but now hates him, did this. They took his pictures, made up this web page and voila--instant humiliation. This is what I need to believe in order to preserve my sanity. Because if this is real....there are no words.
The only women he would possibly get out of this are the ones who are fat, old, or unattractive. I think he would be lucky to land any of those women. I'm surprised no one made a Kid Rock reference...or was that too obvious?
This guy has standards????
Oh my god, I have seen it all.
http://www.myspace.com/hes_so_blind
Why can't this guy just do what all the other skeezes do and just take home some poor drunk chic from the bar?
Can't wait for the SNL skit on this one...
Oh wow, he's here in Louisville! In Kenfucky, oral sex means saying 'fuck you'. I was fingered on the way home from work yesterday when someone flipped me the bird.
Poor Mr. Vampire Lord, his dark blonde hair died from an off form of magenta. Somewhere in Louisville, a purplish red blob is killing hair.
Submitted by Sheeps on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 12:12pm.
He's shy about his accountant-sized dick.
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EXCUSE ME, but I'll have you to know that my peen is of normal size. *stomps away*
I want to know how the fuck you get a degree in "science."
Submitted by grapedrinkbaby on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 10:35am.
the medieval sword collection being "temporarily out of my possession" is code for i loaned it to the meth dealer
GDB... I love your name. One of my all time fave Chapelle stand up.
And about this pale, smelly stacio-ed freak- all I can say is "thanks but I rather stick a cactus in my no no holes." ouch.
"She is wearing a fucking banana clip.
She must be destroyed." -- seaclint on Michelle Duggar
Submitted by madam s. on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 12:00pm.
I find it curious that Wiccan Medieval accountant nerd boy is so obsessed with only "orally pleasuring" and "massaging" women. Does intercourse offend his Transformers-collecting mentality?
He's shy about his accountant-sized dick.
Ew. Just ew. I think I threw up in my mouth a little bit.
is his mouth clean? are there open sores and oozing puss teeth one should look out for before being subjected to some free face...
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certified in knocking dicks outta mouths...
Ugh I LOVE his term "Free Face". I'm so using it in every way now. "Hey, let's go out to the clubs tonight, we may score some Free Face"
<"if that was me (the ex-girlfriend), I'd have him advertising to rent out his nonono hole, and other like services.">
True - maybe name, picture, and email isn't embarrassing enough. It's phony baloney.
Submitted by TexnDoc on Wed, 01/07/2009 - 11:57am.
There is at least one bitter rejected ex-girlfriend in Louisville with computer skills.
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you really think so ? if that was me (the ex-girlfriend), I'd have him advertising to rent out his ohnoudont hole, and other like services.
I find it curious that Wiccan Medieval accountant nerd boy is so obsessed with only "orally pleasuring" and "massaging" women. Does intercourse offend his Transformers-collecting mentality?
There is at least one bitter rejected ex-girlfriend/wife in Louisville with computer skills.
Muffy the Vampire Layer
oh, this is charming.
"Also, I will not go down on anyone who is on the rag unless we are dating. Sorry for the inconvenience"
I didn't think vampires were picky about where they got their blood from.
He looks like one of those guys who doesn't realize he's got food caught in his 'stache.
I wonder if dingleberries shoot out of his nose when he forces a snot rocket.
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The only time I open my mouth is to change feet.
Let's see: he's an accountant and science geek. He collects Transformers and medieval weaponry. He's into vampires and goth. And he can't find a girl? Has he tried the Louisville Renaissance Faire?
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Wow, this is graphic.
He links to his MySpace, and this is his status:
"George out of the halfway house now!"
/drops pants
☠
"With every 5th Valtrex refill, you get your very own Vh1 reality show!" -MK
http://www.myspace.com/zoloftpony