St. Angie Is Not Amused
I accidentally ran into the Critics Choice Awards on Vh1 last night at the perfect perfect time. It's like some supreme being (Maddox) touched my hand and softly guided me towards a moment they knew I could not miss.
The moment started with Ben Stiller announcing the winner for Best Actress. St. Angie Jo did not win. Surprisingly, the venue's support beams did not break, forcing the entire joint to crash into a pile of dust and rubble. Instead, it was a tie between Anne Hathaway for that movie about a piece of trash at a wedding and Meryl Streep for that movie about holy child touching. They were probably hoping for a Devil Wears Prada reunion, but that shit didn't happen, because Meryl Streep was a no-show. This might have been a blessing, because if she did show, this moment probably would have never happened!
During Anne Hathaway's frantic, frazzled, 8-year-old girl on meth speech, the camera kept panning to St. Angie's face... HER FACE! If looks could kill virgin angels, this would be it. I wish I could bottle her smugness and spray it on my face whenever I am not amused. It was a dazzling moment. I learned that wax figure gods can give cuntface! No wonder Anne Hathaway acted so cracked the fuck out. Angie kept giving her the "my shit don't stank, but yours does" look. Anne's insides were slowly rotting away from St. Angie's stares of DEATH! Or maybe Anne just mixed her Adderall and Ephedrasil. Probably the latter.
I really hope Anne wins at the Golden Globes this Sunday and that they install a StAngieCam to capture every single one of Angie Jo's smirks. It's fun when she loses!
Below is the clip from the moment that played in every Brangaloonie's nightmares last night. Oh and Anne, your gums are receding, because you're on speed or some shit! Smoke a bowl and relax.
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You just know the crackheards at JJ are collectively crapping themselves with delight while licking their monitors.
I fucking hate awards shows. No one wants to be there but they all go. They are one great big circle jerk for celebs who wither away if they don't milk every second of screen time they can.
Fuck.
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A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
i am so glad angie didnt win shit. fuck her.
Tim Tebow. Gators. Future Hall of Famer
she was so nervous her voice was shaking
i think angie looked amused not condescending
I hope Anne wins the golden globe and the oscar, angie's head will explode.
team Hathaway.
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The truth hurts like two hard dicks going in your butt without lube. MK
Submitted by Clarisse on Fri, 01/09/2009 - 10:19am.
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Eggfuckinzackery!
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"I'll get handcuffed for you and gladly spend a night or two in the clink." ~MK
Both Anne and Rosemarie were brilliant in "Rachel"...
Angelina has the acting range of Tom Cruise.
She was great in Gia and G.,I. because both characters were self-absorbed mental cases...*cough*cough*
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... so self aware, so full of shit.
wow angelina was so giving the cuntface.
ImpertinentVixen on Fri, 01/09/2009 - 10:17am.
Surely St. Angie deserves to win the Diva Cup?
-I'm sure she expected something just for showing up.
Is that baby rumor chat times I hear being created?
She'll be knocked up and adopting by Sunday for the Golden Globes...
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
VOTE FOR MK
http://2008.weblogawards.org/polls/best-gossip-blog/
Anne is not an award worthy actress.
Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Fri, 01/09/2009 - 10:17am.
Surely St. Angie deserves to win the Diva Cup?
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And if she did, I would also hope that her cup runneth over.
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"I'll get handcuffed for you and gladly spend a night or two in the clink." ~MK
Ang-ho looks like she's wearing 10 pounds of foundation and Pitt looks like his usual I'm-smelling-boiling-brussels-sprouts-and-I-don't-care-for-it look.
Assholes.
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A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
Surely St. Angie deserves to win the Diva Cup?
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Chicago area 5K race 2009: http://rallyforautism.com/
Why do they always have that fake "oh your so funny" pose on the red carpet?
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You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you?
Submitted by pixielemonade on Fri, 01/09/2009 - 10:10am.
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I went to see 'Rachel Getting Married' last weekend to see what all the fuss about and i was actually pleasantly surprised by Anne Hathaways performance. I thought it was a brilliant film and im definitely a fan now.
"I don't go to your job and knock the dicks out of your mouth!"
- Kathy Griffin
Submitted by snowpiece on Fri, 01/09/2009 - 10:06am.
luvs me some Charles M first thing in the AM, LOL thanks Charlie!
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Oh my innocent eyes!
LMAO!!!
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Ho buster #1!
Angie needs to get over herself. No one but the loonies considers her an Actress anymore. She's just the babymaking half of Brangelina.
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CROCS are made in the devil's workshop. Yes, they are!
AAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!
OWNED, SERVED AND LOOSER!!!!!
No one really good last night either, except Kate Beckinsale, she really did look flawless but then again, look at the competition.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
VOTE FOR MK
http://2008.weblogawards.org/polls/best-gossip-blog/
Mark my words folks, Anne is soon to be on a milk carton.
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"We do not gnaw on our kitties"
Dr. Evil
I wish she would have put Anne in timeout. Damn girl was all crack chipmunk like and not making sense.........I loved the look on Angelina's face
Memo to St. Angie: You're not nearly as important as you seem to think you are.
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Heath Ledger
4/4/79 - 1/22/08
I lurrrve Anne Hathaway!! Her speech was way goofy, but that's what I love about her - she's just like one of us.
I haven't seen the Rachel movie, but I always feel her acting is fantastically under-rated. Not like Angie, where you can't forget it's "Angelina playing a role as..."
Anyway, anything was worth seeing that look on Angie's face. Ha!
- I agree about the dresses, yikes!
A tie between her two competitors. So that was a double-diss.
Tick did you watch the video? to me she looks like she is trying to look magnanimous but it's not working cuz she's not a good actress, she looks pissed.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
vote for MK come on hurry up vote often
http://2008.weblogawards.org/polls/best-gossip-blog/
Is that Charles Manson...more like a breath of fresh air early in the morning. Preach it, Charles! I couldn't agree more.
Having dozens of kids has aged these two sluts ten years...She's starting to get a Norma Desmond thing going on...
"When I'm good I'm very good but when I'm bad I'm better." ~Mae West
Even though i hate husband stealing Jolie, i don't see her cuntface? She looks tired and bloated but not catty.....
Hmm
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My brother wouldn't touch your titties with a ten foot pole. He likes his women bad, Lenora, not cheap.
More proof that this sanctimonious is nothing but an odious bitch. For a chick that supposedly has everything, she sure acts like she needs more validation.
"I don't go to your job and knock the dicks out of your mouth!"
- Kathy Griffin
That speech was inconceivable in its, spewing brilliance like little rainbows, twirled, set the bar so high, can't touch, although my brain was touched...
She must have gone to the Courtney Love school of speech writing.
I'm not sure why, but Anne's dress makes me think of "Victor/Victoria" when I look at it.
~*~Hello, my baby! Hello, my honey! Hello, my ragtime gal....~*~
luvs me some Charles M first thing in the AM, LOL thanks Charlie!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"
vote for MK come on hurry up vote often
http://2008.weblogawards.org/polls/best-gossip-blog/
Angie is going to unleash her army of tiny ninjas led by Maddox upon Anne.
BRRRRR!
"Come, Watson! There's fuckery afoot!."
Buyah Bitch! Suck on it, and I hope it's the new trend. Anne may have been a rambling fool, but you can't deny her talent compared to AngHOlina.
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"I'll get handcuffed for you and gladly spend a night or two in the clink." ~MK
ANGELINA YOU ARE A GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING BITCH. DO YOU HEAR ME, A FUCKING BITCH. I DONT CARE HOW YOU AND BRAD WANT TO FUCKING SUGAR COAT IT, YOU ARE A SLEAZY FUCKING HUSBAND GODDAMN FUCKING STEALER. NO ONE GOES AFTER A FUCKING WELL MARRIED MAN UNLESS YOU ARE A COMPLETE AND TOTAL CUNT. YOU KNEW HE WAS FUCKING MARRIED, YOU KNEW HE WAS GODDAMN CO-HABITATING WITH HIS GODDAMN FUCKING WIFE. BUT YOU FUCKING DID IT ANYWAY. FUCK YOU. MY WIFE AND I HAD A VERY LONG GODDAMN FUCKING CONVERSATION BEFORE WE GOT MARRIED AND AGREED THAT IF EITHER FUCKING ONE OF US SHOULD FIND ANOTHER WE WOULD RATHER FUCKING GODDAMN BE WITH, IT WOULD BE HANDLED SILENTLY AND PEACFULLY. YOUR GODDAMN FUCKING WHORE ASS AND STUPID FUCKING BRAD DECIDED TO FUCKING FLAUNT IT AT THE GODDAMN FUCKING EXPENSE OF YOUR POOR WIFE. GODDAMN. I FUCKING DONT BLAME HER FOR BEING REALLY FUCKING GODDAMN UPSET FOR THE OBVIOUSE PUBLIC FUCKING HUMILIATION. I WOULD BE TO.
I foresee thousands of Brangeloonies getting thumbnail #11 tattooed on asses across America.
I love the "I'm only here because I'm Hollywood Royalty" look. Good for you Miss Crawford. Thats one thing about awarding Academy Awards - once they've won it they can point to the fact they already have one. She's just there as part of Brad's campaign for his.
oh, and she (angelina) does that shit on purpose..its obvious. then she'll get interviewed over it and that will give her a platform to be all holy. bad actress
Can't stand the bitch and am boycotting any movie she or Mr. Jolie are in.
That speech or rambling was embarrassing.
Was she nominated for best actress from the Changeling movie failure? If she had a sexier roll (not role), she'd probably have won. Perhaps this is the dawn of a new day where Brangelina starts to fade away. *crosses fingers*
Both dresses are ugly and Angie thinks her shits ice cream.
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is angie carrying a purse or chinese takeout
Snowy- I don't think it's out yet.
To me, AJ didn't look smug, but like she was about to cry.
I wish I could bottle her smugness and spray it on my face whenever I am not amused. It was a dazzling moment. I learned that wax figure gods can give cuntface! (MK)
OOPS at work i'm in a rush to post before the boss comes in and forget to do all my editing..I need some smugness spray to show him..pfft!
Clearly, I'm alone on this one, but I actually like AJ's dress. It's classic and not slutty. Not slutty is very refreshing these days.
~*~Hello, my baby! Hello, my honey! Hello, my ragtime gal....~*~
"Rachel Getting Married" is supposed to be really good...I have read nothing but rave reviews for it. Plus, I think everyone but the loons are sick and tired of Brangie.
You can see how annoyed she is, the fine actress that she is. Ingracious bitch.
HAR HAR FUCKING HARDEE HAR HAR HAR..HA!
I wish I could bottle her smugness and spray it on my face whenever I am not amused. It was a dazzling moment. I learned that wax figure gods can give cuntface! No wonder Anne Hath
gushgushgushMerylgushgushgsuh,yawn, OWN IT or give it away Anne!
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"Richard: Oh my God, I'm getting pulled over. Everyone, just... pretend to be normal."
"if I ain't being too subtle. Oh, why be
subtle?" - MK
HAHA! Loser! My cats' turds act better than AJ & BP. heeheehee
How could Angie not know she wasn't going to win?
Every review I read trashed her performance (not to mention the glaring red lippy).
And Anne Hathaway looks like she forgot to take the napkin out of her lap before she went onstage.
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I want to put on my my my my my boogie shoes.
Fancy dress : 5,000 dollars
Fancy shoes: 800 dollars
Fancy fake face after being beaten by Princess Thermopolis…FUCKING PRICELESS!
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... so self aware, so full of shit.