Tuesday, January 13th 2009

These Two Boring Bitches Actually Surprised Me!

Most of us figured Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck would give their new kid a flower name since their first daughter is named Violet. So it's not really surprising that they used Rose as her middle name. But her first name is Seraphina! Jen's spokesbitch told People that they named their week-old daughter Seraphina Rose Elizabeth Affleck. YES! Jen and Ben are still two boring pieces of boiled broccoli, but I've just added a little melted cheddar cheese on top of them for naming their daughter Seraphina!

Seraphina Rose sounds like the name an aging gothic stripper who works the "50 cent beer" shift at some truck stop club. I absolutely adore the name! Although, I once got food poisoning at a restaurant named Serafina.......

I just hope Jen and Ben don't call her Sera or I'll have to scrape the melted cheese off of them.

Posted by: Michael K


Marla Singer's picture

No comment other than this: Seraphim Rose from Wikipedia: Born to Frank and Esther Rose in San Diego, Eugene was raised in California, where he would remain his entire life. He was baptized in the Methodist faith at fourteen years old, but later became an atheist, losing all belief in God. Rated at genius level in high school in formal IQ testing, in San Francisco he entered a beatnik phase in his life and practiced Buddhism.

In the summer of 1955, between his junior and senior years at college, Eugene met Finnish-born Jon Gregerson, through whom he came into initial contact with the Orthodox faith. Eugene came out as homosexual to a close friend from college after his mother discovered letters penned between her son and Walter Pomeroy, a friend from high school. Eugene later shed his identity as a gay man as he slowly accepted Orthodoxy, eventually ending his lengthy relationship with Gregerson

Anthea's picture

I like it!

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A prayer for the wild at heart - kept in cages / Tennessee Williams

Bertha's picture

I bet someone really cool around them came up with that name, it isn't possible for them to think of anything outside their box.

grgt's picture

I never knew it stood for "fiery ones", now it all makes sense :)

gia's picture

Funny you say that grgt about your grandmothers temper because Serafina is from Seraphim, meaning fiery ones...My friend named her new baby Olivia after her mom, but loves the name Adele (ICK!!) because its less common, so she basically calls her baby Adele instead of its real name. I am all for Liv as a nickname to Olivia.

grgt's picture

My grandmothers name is Serafina, i find it a very nice name. Although she has quite a temper, bless her.

hotsugarlove's picture

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Condi the ingrown toenail's picture

Mike, you know that Affleck and his brother Casey are closet cholos, right? They speak Spanish perfectly, which I guess means they're not really cholos after all. Whatever. I think Ben and the wife are just trying to give a little "flava" to their baby girl with that name. I'll bet Violet is jealous - maybe she'll start calling herself "Violetta." Or "La Sneaky."

Creepella's picture

Submitted by StudLy GoLightLy on Wed, 01/14/2009 - 12:01am.

LOVE your name! There are so many beautiful names and these two glasses of milk chose Serafina?

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Bye! Good

StudLy GoLightLy's picture

To "HotSlutOfTheDecade"

My name is Analiese Michele & I adore it (this despite the fact that I call myself StudLy GoLightly, but that's another story...). Considering the other names my mother considered were Barbara, Faye, Alisha, & Donna, I was very lucky. Francesca is the only cool name she picked, but Analiese won.

"Society sooner or later must return to its lost leader, the cultured and fascinating liar..." (Spaghedeity)

HotSlutOfTheDecade's picture

Submitted by  on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 11:49pm.

Hmmmm...maybe you're right about that. LOL

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Submitted by HotSlutOfTheDecade on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 11:44pm.

What do you guys think of Liliana Marie? That's what I named my baby girl and if I ever have another little girl I'll name her Analiese Josephina.
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Liliana Marie is an ADORABLE, beautiful name! "Analiese"...uhm...er...uh...*hem-haw*...welllllll... "anal-ease"? Nuff said?

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HotSlutOfTheDecade's picture

What do you guys think of Liliana Marie? That's what I named my baby girl and if I ever have another little girl I'll name her Analiese Josephina.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.

HotSlutOfTheDecade's picture

Submitted by Hekki on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 4:35pm.

So far the only unique kid names that I haven't heard twice are Lorelei, Maximus and Audrey.

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I knew a Lorelei and a Maximus in my grade school and I've known a dozen or so Audreys.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? ...All of it.

literarylioness's picture

'I have two middle names. I am named after my God parents. I am 1/2 French. It is apparently common(or was)

We French hyphen our names. Like my dad, his name is Jean-Philippe Paul, but Jean-Philippe is his first name and Paul is his middle name. He just goes by "John", because Americans kept thinking he was a woman.

Cute and very girly. Better than Josephina. You can be sure that Elizabeth is the Christening name. It's better than the catch all Marie/Maria/Mary which I have.

What's with the potato sack dress on Jen? No spank you.

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Phoebe's picture

I wonder if they have any Italian in their backgrounds, since wasn't Violet named after some relative? Or did they just pick it out of nowhere?

Seraphina's a pretty common Italian name, and it's spelled with the PH, not F, like my mom's name Josephine.

QueenOfTrashin's picture

My money is on Sera Rose.

It kinda sounds wetback!

goodA's picture

I Googled it:

SERAFINA
Gender: Feminine

Usage: Italian, Polish

Pronounced: se-rah-FEE-nah (Polish) [key]

Italian and Polish form of SERAPHINA

Datura's picture

Aww. My middle school Italian teacher was named Serafina. I think it's a lovely name.

The couple bores me, but they did a good job picking a REAL name that's somewhat off the beaten path (but shouldn't embarrass the child when she's older).

“I ejaculate boiling venom, so I’d need to wear like fifty condoms.”

Submitted by shut the smurf up on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 6:01pm.

Being lonely is just unhappiness at being alone! If we accept it and learn to like it, no more loneliness. :)

paris herpes's picture

smurf, i have no accent whatsoever, i was raised partly here and partly @ PR...and I look like a gringa. I probably mostly am, was born in Detroit after all.

STFU!!!

I never seen there baby before..and i would love to see how she looks, but i don't think they make a cute couple anyways.

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stake_spike's picture

Oh please it was their try at being edgy. You know these two are going to call her Sera.

blksheep's picture

I was hoping for Bertha.
Im bringing Bertha back!

carefreea's picture

It's a sweet enough name and I also have two middle names, one is the name my dad wanted me to have and the other is a family name. Thankfully, I didn't go through with confirmation though as then it'd be three!

MAD's picture

awww... my ol' Italian aunty is named Seraphina... (they call her FINA) when I was kid I thought she was named after that old gas station lol...

angel_i's picture

Submitted by SMASHLEY on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 6:12pm.

Awww, this name makes me happy for a very odd reason.

I just wrapped playing 'Serafina Delle Rose', the lead in Tennessee William's 'The Rose Tattoo' last month.

It kinda sounds like they were a fan of this play,
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SMASHLEY's picture

Awww, this name makes me happy for a very odd reason.

I just wrapped playing 'Serafina Delle Rose', the lead in Tennessee William's 'The Rose Tattoo' last month.

It kinda sounds like they were a fan of this play, but it's pretty out there one you read or see it.

SpiceDong's picture

They should have left it at Elizabeth Affleck. That would have been enough and it has a ring to it. Wonder if the Seraphina and Rose were added in honor of grandmas or great grandmas. Sorry, I do not want to be an elitist but the only Seraphinas I know of are maids and not hot at all. Poor kid.

Weren't these 2 about to split anyway? should we expect for the announcement any day now?

shut the smurf up's picture

Submitted by Sheeps on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 5:58pm.
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 4:40pm.

Soledad is lovely. Nuttin wrong with being alone.

There's nothing wrong with being alone Agreed, but there is something wrong with being lonely.

I dunno, I never liked it.but all you guys saying is pretty, make me wonder LOL.

Submitted by shut the smurf up on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 4:40pm.

Soledad is lovely. Nuttin wrong with being alone.

DeeDee's picture

Submitted by paris herpes on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 5:10pm.
xxyxz, most latinos have at least 3-4 last names. I only use one tho, sometimes 2.
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I only have one middle name. But I do have an unusual first name.

krazykelly's picture

I think it sounds like a black girl's name. Probably because everytime I hear that name or see it in print, I think of Whoopi Goldberg. Because she was in a movie called "Sarafina" in 1992.

dallyflyguy's picture

seraphina pekkala is the character name of the witch in the golden compass series, played by eva green

xxyxz's picture

I love you too,Miss Priss♥

I have two middle names. I am named after my God parents. I am 1/2 French. It is apparently common(or was)

Miss Priss's picture

Awww thnx xxyxz! You're so niiiice! =)
I ♥u

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You got your problems, I got my hash pipe
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chowgirl69's picture

Interesting name for a band-aid baby, why aren't they divorced yet?

snarla's picture

Serafina is the fat whore from 8 1/2 with the crazy eye make-up and for that, the name is AWESOME (although it's spelled differently)

http://www.felliniana.com/images/saraghina.jpg

shut the smurf up's picture

Submitted by paris herpes on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 5:16pm.
smurf i went to bs.as. over 3 years ago. it was awesome, really really large, i went to tigre and iguazu. i liked how everyone vocears there, it is too cute1

I love our accent, I don't have it anymore though I have a mix between puerorican and Dominican. My morther goes CRAZY over that, but I can't help it.

paris herpes's picture

i think i meant vosear not vocear oops...!

STFU!!!

xxyxz's picture

I LIKE your name Miss Priss

paris herpes's picture

xxyxz, some people used like 3 last names i guess, if i did my name would take forever to write. i even leave out my typical "maria" middle name.

STFU!!!

Farrah's picture

Submitted by paris herpes on Tue, 01/13/2009 - 5:11pm.

Farrah wow it's in a fancy pants part of the city, eh? I've only been to santiago's airport. I've been in buenos aires though.
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oh, you probably where at the old airport. Yeah, that one was a shame!
Santiago has changed a lot, it has become quite cosmopolitan. Too bad some people's egos have grown along with the city.. snobs!
I hope it's not one of those "please no pics" exhibitions. I wanna take pics for Kdracofan!

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jiggywiddit's picture

Que Sera(phina), Sera(phina).

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WHEN did Rojo use the ginge for good? She could have used her self as an emergancy cone at an accident to divert traffic NO!!! NEVER!!! She just sits there!--Tookinstein

paris herpes's picture

smurf i went to bs.as. over 3 years ago. it was awesome, really really large, i went to tigre and iguazu. i liked how everyone vocears there, it is too cute1

STFU!!!

Miss Priss's picture

Well for those of you who know my real name, talk about fucking weird

Anyway, I don't like Saraphina. sounds like Aquafina
I knew a girl named Evian, like the water bottle. She was a cunt

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You got your problems, I got my hash pipe
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ba_NNKyUwEE

"Bench sucking is only for after midnight. Dumb blue motherfucker!" MK 12.30.08