Wigs Gone Wild | Dlisted

Has Satan been playing matchmaker again, because FoxNews' Pop Tarts says the walking wig cemetary known as Kim Zolciak and the skeeze of all skeezes Joe Francis are "dating." Do you hear that? I think it's the sound of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse galloping towards us. Or maybe it's just my stomach dry heaving.

Kim and her new Big Papa apparently were spotted "getting cozy" at Sundance (aka FUGDANCE) this past weekend. They also shared a house together with some other hos.

Nothing pretty can come out of this union. Nothing. There is not a pill out there strong enough to help me deal with seeing Kim lift her shirt up and flash her microwaved plasti-tits in the next Girls Gone Wild video. They will have to change the title to Delusional Hags Gone Wild.

But maybe douchebag Joe has something else planned. Maybe he will finally solve the mystery as to what's under Kim's back alley wig by getting her to rip it off in Wigs Gone Wild! I think DeShawn Snow is the only one that has seen what's hiding underneath there. That's why she can't unclench her fucking jaw. She's been traumatized!

There's a tightrope.....and I may need to throw myself off of it if Kim and Joe really are bumping baginas.

Thanks Micah

Posted by: Michael K

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Submitted by happilygirl on Thu, 01/22/2009 - 1:59pm.

She looks so hoooot! I love her, I am her big fan! Just a question about her, is she single again? I saw her profile on millionaire dating site_____www celebmingle com____last week. Just curious! looooooooool

Submitted by happywihu on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 10:41pm.

They seems sweet, the dude should stop dating on www. celebmingle. com. His username is wishuhappy243 there, you can have a check if you don`t belive.

Submitted by kylewu86 on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 10:32pm.

Hey guys, great news! Sugarbaby can register freely now! Let's go to ***SUGARBABYDATE.COM***.There are many beautiful girls and rich men, this online community is designed to help rich men or beautiful girls. There are over thousands of profiles! Hot babes and rich men are waiting for you! You can get their pictures, phone numbers, location, and almost any information. And maybe, they are just around your neighborhood.

Submitted by TITS on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 5:05pm.

I imagine dating her gives him a big step up in the credibility department.

.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.

Submitted by peaches on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 4:33pm.

She's probably the classiest girl he's ever dated, lol!!

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*I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*

Submitted by jiggywiddit on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 3:49pm.

Looks like Joe Francis and Bruce Jenner had the same quack plastic surgeon.

They both looke like the Madame puppet from the 70s. Or the puppet devils from Mr> Rogers' Neighborhood.

Save me, Lady Elaine!

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I think I've already been appraised for a couple of hundred pesos, a lame goat and an elderly monkey with a farting problem.--MK

Submitted by Bondagebarbie on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 3:06pm.

Does Francis even have enough money left to attract a gold digger?..I would pass on him..yuck....

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.

Submitted by letinstar on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 2:49pm.

how is joe francis out of jail? did kim's wig slip him a file so he can bust out?
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whoa...amber is the color of your energy...

Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 1:33pm.

Submitted by putsomestankonit on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:59pm.

I thought Joe Francis was safely tucked away in jail?

Maybe Kim's should be taken away by CPS? After all she a disgusting famewhore and she's dating Joe Francis with two young daughters!
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O - I was JUST gonna ask that.
Nasty.

♥ ThreadKilla!
DListed WEEK IN REVIEW! Now with beer goggles:)

Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 1:32pm.

Waddyamean? They're perfect for each other!

♥ ThreadKilla!
DListed WEEK IN REVIEW! Now with beer goggles:)

Submitted by putsomestankonit on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 1:29pm.

I thought Joe Francis was safely tucked away in jail?

Maybe Kim's should be taken away by CPS? After all she a disgusting famewhore and she's dating Joe Francis with two young daughters! Having him around young girls is not a good thing.

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http://hesterprinesworld.blogspot.com/
A place for book lovers and free thinkers.

Submitted by girl_cheese on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 1:06pm.

I didn't even know Joe was gay.

Submitted by Incitatus on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:53pm.

Yeah I thought he was still in jail too, but I guess that was just wishful thinking on my part.

Submitted by TEE on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:44pm.

She lost weight, looks skinnier. and thats all I got- haha!

Submitted by urmomma on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:42pm.

Joe looks like he is dying of some undisclosed illness.
On the bright side: if his hair falls out due to illness, he can borrow her hair. Win-win situation.

hugs y'all
xoxoxo

Submitted by sammyking on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:40pm.

It is wrong for a man have a rich woman or a woman have a wealthy man?

It is an absolutely extramarital relationship. but more and more services come out on Internet focusing on this kind

of relationship.

such as http://www.searchingmillionaire.com/

it's the biggest dating site for wealthy and suclessful people.

Submitted by beakers bitch on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:36pm.

Submitted by Sugaroo on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:35am.
Submitted by beakers bitch on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:26am.

She's way too old for him. Isn't this disgusting pig into 12 year old girls? I never watched the show so I don't know if this stupid bitch has any kids, but if she did, she'd better keep them the hell away from him. Ugh.
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Please don't call him a pig. Pigs are cute, sweet and clean. Joe Francis - not so much.

Oops! My apologies to any pig I might have offended with my insensitive remark. Please replace pig with misogynistic, sexual predator douchebag in my previous comment. Sorry, piggies!

Submitted by Silvara0428 on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:33pm.

Oh, so he IS turning over a new leaf...

(She's a guy!)

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"We do not gnaw on our kitties"
Dr. Evil

Submitted by KD on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:32pm.

Submitted by Clarisse on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:06am.
That crater faced dude is 19? He must hang out with Linda too much because its starting to have an effect on him.

Submitted by Clevelandsports... on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:25pm.

I DON'T BELIEVE THAT STORY ONE SECOND!!! Why would Joe Francis (who can have any young fresh out of collage gold digger he wanted) be interested in a wig wearing, saggy breasted, chain smoking,goose faced, gold-digging whore like Kim?.
Maybe his into cougars who just turned "50". Oops...."30".

Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:15pm.

He looks like a puppet. They're both disgusting. If I were Robert Redford, and saw the trash who RSVP'd to Sundance this year, I wouldn't have fucking cancelled that shit.
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How can you thank God for a song that the Devil helped you write?

Submitted by snuffy on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:06pm.

i really hope they have babies, babies born tan-in-a-can orange with busted wigs. glorious.

Submitted by Sugaroo on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:05pm.

Submitted by beakers bitch on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:26am.

Please don't call him a pig. Pigs are cute, sweet and clean. Joe Francis - not so much.

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So what if some of the crayons are missing; use the ones still in the box. Maybe the world needs a purple horse.

Submitted by ImpertinentVixen on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:05pm.

I heard they met at suclessfuldouches.com were many young professional go to find happy mate!

♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀
Chicago area 5K race 2009: http://rallyforautism.com/

Submitted by RecessVillain on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:04pm.

Joe is out of jail and has the gay-tan to boot.
BTW- FUGDANCE is just about the funnest thing all week.

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"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."
-Oscar Wilde

Submitted by Sugaroo on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:03pm.

Hekki, doesn't he look like a fruity little bitch? Well, he always was. He can dish the abuse but can't take it.

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So what if some of the crayons are missing; use the ones still in the box. Maybe the world needs a purple horse.

Submitted by OneLiner on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:03pm.

AIM HIGHER!!!!!!

(haha i'm gonna be using this one a lot)

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"Home remedy #108: IF YOU HAVE A BAD COUGH, TAKE A LARGE DOSE OF LAXATIVES. THEN YOU'LL
BE AFRAID TO COUGH.

Submitted by parissucksliterally on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:02pm.

He is such a piece of SHIT. He needs to marry Paris.

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"I love Angelina Jolie. She's strong but gorgeous and uses her fame for good to make a big difference in the world. That's a great quality. I'd have a lot in common with her."
-Paris Hilton

Submitted by ToddIsMe on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 12:02pm.

Michael K. You need to stop immediatley what you are doing, and give full attention to this blessed union of God's children.

I stand by and watch Fuggie Fug, marry Josh Dumel. And I see Mickey Rourke pick up poon from Rachel Evan Wood. And I say nothing.

But I cannot be silent now.

You must bless this union of love, and give it your full support and enouragement.

KIM ZOLCIAK MUST MARRY JOE FRANCES!!!!!!!!!

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http://careerpeople.blogspot.com

90's music, Blossom, music videos, musicians, fashion, kanye west, rihanna, Britney Spears, request line, DJ, graffiti, Hip Hop, Oral Sex, Career things, People and ca

Submitted by beakers bitch on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:56am.

Submitted by Deb on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:55am.

Submitted by Clarisse on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:06am.

Thanks, Clarisse. THAT was nauseating! I hope there was some Pro-Activ in that swag for young pizza-face.

"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson

Submitted by devilgirl on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:55am.

WTF is going on in this world? Well it's better the two of them together, instead of them potentially polluting a good gene pool!

Submitted by waywhiteboyj on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:52am.

I worship the foam head she rests her hair on at night.
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"Don't fuck with me fellas. This ain't my first time at the rodeo."

Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:48am.

Hekki Bruce Jenner looks ridic. but he fits right in with those Kardashians!
****************************1/20/09
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"thats my favorite bible saying bitch!"

Submitted by Deb on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:42am.

"Worthless, meet worthless."

"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson

Submitted by parkerj on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:42am.

This has to be one of the most pathetic couples ever to grace Dlisted. Pure trash. Aim higher folks! If you are trash, you should try to date non-trash!

Submitted by chasing windmills on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:41am.

Blah, but it all makes sense. I mean who else would grasp this grandma skin looking 30 year old but skanky Joe?

Submitted by Kevette on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:39am.

Submitted by Clarisse on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:06am.

It's hard to hate on Linda Hogan. If a 40+ year old guy dates a young woman it's considered alright, but if roles are reversed it's considered disgusting. I think that whole family is white trash, but I can't hate on her for dating a younger man.

Submitted by darlingjulie on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:39am.

Just the kid of guy that I would want around my daughters, if I had any.

Submitted by Clarisse on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:36am.

This is a GREAT story about Linda Hogan (49 years old) making out with that 19 year old at Sundance...

http://www.celebitchy.com/31699/linda_hogan_makes_out_with_19_year-old_b...

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Take Nothing but pictures. Leave nothing but footprints. Kill nothing but time.

CB!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DDPuzOq_tbA&feature=related

Submitted by Dirk Diggler on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:31am.

Somebody throw a lit match at that pile of nylon -- hopefully while Kim is still wearing it.

Submitted by christine the hoff on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:31am.

I thought that bitch was in jail??

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Child? Fucking grown-man poo. Your anus will be in grown-man shambles.

Submitted by mike on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:28am.

Yet again we had two in the cross-hairs. Ah, missed opportunities...

Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:25am.

Many REAL celebs (*cough cough*) left Sundance to go to the Inauguration. Sundance was left with the dregs.

Submitted by Fucking_Classy on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:25am.

Submitted by Freak Speely on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 10:53am.

Are they just letting *anybody* get pictured for the Sundance festival anymore...? Redford needs to take a long look at the guest list.
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De Niro complained exactly the same thing about Tribeca film festival. Let's hope Tribeca gets a little classier this year.

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"Love is in the air. And it's pooping on my head."

Submitted by Kevette on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:25am.

What the fuck is going on with Joe's face? He's wearing more eye make-up than that bitch with the busted up weave! Horrendous!

Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:25am.

Submitted by Sugaroo: "...How much plastic surgery did Joe Francis have!? Look at him! He's hardly recognizable!"

Yeah! He looks very different!

I think that when men get plastic surgery, they wind up looking feminine. It's like the surgeons only know how to do feminine features or something. Even Burt Reynolds, who USED TO BE one of the manliest looking guys around, looks like an old memaw with a mustache. Bruce Jenner is another example. Michael Douglas, too.

Submitted by Mrs. Gosling on Wed, 01/21/2009 - 11:23am.

I doubt this is true...as much of a douche that he is im sure he has plenty of young pretty whores throwing themselves at him...plust this wouldnt even be a publicity stunt since nobody cares lol

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I never stay on topic :)