This Has Gone Too Far!
Why are the Girl Scouts doing this to me? Why are they killing me softly by putting less delicious bites of heaven into cookie each box? Why are they so evil?! They might as well deep fry me and throw me towards Aretha Franklin to put me out of my misery. This is fuck fuck fuckery beyond fuckery. I knew I couldn't trust those little bitches.
The Girl Scouts of America have stuck a rusty knife into my throat by announcing that there will be fewer Thin Mints, Do-si-dos and Tagalongs in boxes this year. Lucky for them, they didn't fuck with Samoas or there really would've been a shank fight. For real.
The Dallas News say the reason for the changes? The fucking economy. They have to cut costs. UGH! Always blaming our caca economy. One of the HBICs of the Girl Scouts said, "We aren't talking about a drastic change. We are just talking about a couple cookies."
No, we're talking about the difference between life and death. Think about it. What if you're happily chomping away on your last box of Thin Mints, savoring each one. Before you know it, your hand goes into the box and you feel nothing. You've eaten them all. According to your calculations, you had two left. But you completely forgot those evil Girl Scouts left two out on purpose. You weren't prepared for this. You panic. You tear your house in two to find more. You call everyone you know. Nothing. You even take a piece of peppermint gum and stuff it into an Oreo, but it's not the same thing. Suddenly you realize that the only reasonable option is suicide. It's the only way to stop the pain. You see, life and death.
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lmfao XD i used to be a girl scout haha
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"Do you think Bill Kaulitiz's carpet match the drapes? If so, a bitch will get their eye poked out while playing his skin flute."
XD
F*CK the Dallas News. Those kuntry twats and their friends in the religious right have been trying to bring down the Girl Scouts of America for years. First it was "oh no, don't by Girl Scout cookies because they make you fat." And then now it's "oh no, don't buy Girl Scout cookies because you won't get fat enough." Shut the fuck up Texas and put some more kuntry fried steak in your mouth.
and i just ordered a 2 boxes from my niece and my mom ordered4. i don't believe this shit. and i'll bet they won't be lowering their prices for the darn cookies either. what a jip.
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"Do i look like a man with a plan"?
the joker. the dark knight.
What the fuck? Those fuckers have been putting less cookies in there as the years go by. Now they're trying to blame it on the economy? They're still going to charge you the same, no wait, more so what the fuck?!?!
LOL MK "according to your calculations". I heard that.
Forgot to add that in most areas, now is the time that Girl Scouts are selling cookies. But not here in the River Bluffs Council. No, here they are ass backward and sell the cookies in October. So the girls who sold cookies in October of 2008 got a 2009 cookie badge. Dumb.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Submitted by fillette on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 6:50pm.
The names of the cookies didn't vary by region. They were the same throughout (i.e. peanut butter patties instead of tagalongs or whatever) ... They switched bakers this year so that's why the cookies' names are all different.
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You are talking about your area. Missouri has ALWAYS had do si dos and tag alongs. Illinois did 30 years ago, but they changed the names of theirs about 15 or 20 years ago to peanut butter sandwiches and peanut butter patties. The Girl Scouts do things differently in every region, and I don't like that. I wish they would do things the same in all the states. In Illinois, we have two different bakers for our cookies. Some girls get their cookies from one baker, some troops get different cookies to sell because they are using the other baker. There is no continuity.
What the heck are dulch de leche cookies? They must have caramel on them or in them.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Nite, Mrs. K, if he whips it out, don't have a stroke.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Sorry to snark and dash, but Pudge and I are stepping out this evening.
(All you can eat buffet at the Royal Fork!!!!)
Later
MUAH
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I believe deep down in my haw-ert that it’s just fine.
But you do what your haw-ert tells you to do.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 10:16pm.
Depends.
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You callin' me incontinent?
Well, are ya?
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I believe deep down in my haw-ert that it’s just fine.
But you do what your haw-ert tells you to do.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 10:12pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 10:06pm.
Every time I see some spoiled brat's mom outside in the cold selling GS cookies, I always make a point of telling them that they're kind of old for the Girl Scouts. Then I ask if they want to get their intercourse badge in the back of my van.
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Is that what those badges are???? I thought all those soccer moms had become Oscar Meyer saleswomen!!!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Mrs.Kravitz on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 10:14pm.
Know what they usuaaly say when I ask how they're not freezing their asses off? Depends.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Submitted by Team Valtrex on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 10:12pm.
I think they call it a "horizontal cha cha" badge nowadays.
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I believe deep down in my haw-ert that it’s just fine.
But you do what your haw-ert tells you to do.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 10:06pm.
Every time I see some spoiled brat's mom outside in the cold selling GS cookies, I always make a point of telling them that they're kind of old for the Girl Scouts. Then I ask if they want to get their intercourse badge in the back of my van.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
Just say NO to Girl Scout Cookies
http://www.forkandbottle.com/rants/food/girlscout_cookies.htm
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I believe deep down in my haw-ert that it’s just fine.
But you do what your haw-ert tells you to do.
Hey, note to you fuckin' moms who come to the office and sell your little rotten snatch dumpling's cookies...I AIN'T BUYIN'!!!
That little bitch needs to go door to door like my tiger ass did when I was a fuckin' girl scout! Oh and I ain't buyin' your little cunt nugget's cookies at the entrance of WalMart or Target either.
If that lil' fucker doesn't come to my door, I ain't buyin' SHIT. And when she comes to my door, I'M ON A FUCKING DIET *slamming door*...
AHAHAHAHAHA! Learn rejection you little whores, it's the only protection you have against your mothers' drive for your 'self esteem' resulting in NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER which will lead to the destructiony of your family and countless others.
God, I'd hate kids so much more if I didn't FUCKIN DESPISE their parents....
miss Kaiserin now?
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
my moms always made me top seller for years, she could sell a cookie! they used to be really good. now they taste like shyt! I say BOYCOTT!!
PS Mrs Fields used to be the shyt too, and now you can't find them in malls anymore, only premade and those taste like shyt too.
In fact most stuff tastes like shyt these days. I think it's all soylent green....
OH and Circuit City is going out of business; this economy is crazy. ***********************************************
dear Lord, please help me not to slap a bitch today, but if I must slap a bitch today, please keep my pimp hand strong. Thank you.
paulapoo, why are the cookies selling here for $4.50?! Those cookies are more expensive then most cookies sold in groceries stores for chrissakes...!? And now you get less of them! HOW RUDE!
STFU!!!
Ok I get the Girl Scouts want girls to learn to responsible and how to handle money, but they need to realize that not all these girls have parents who have the time or money to help them sell cookies or can afford to pay for cookies that they don't sell. There has to be some sort of reality training for the girls AND parents if the girls really want to be in Girl Scouts and learn all these values. Those cookies are making me DAMN hungry!!!! I liked the peanut butter and chocolate ones too. Do GS cookies still have corn syrup in them?
STFU!!!
between sex and Samoas I'd gladly forego the former and satisfy my self if I could do so with a mouthful of the latter
Submitted by joe shmoe on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 2:35pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 2:30pm.
Submitted by Zappy on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 2:08pm.
I knew the Girl Scouts were a bunch of greedy whores when they kicked me out..er asked me to leave many years ago.
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Same.
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Alright Angel - fess up! What did you do to get kicked out of the Girl Scouts?
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Well, this was a long time ago - sorry. I mean the post. LOL!
I just asked a lotta questions. And then I gave bitchface to the answers or something.
♥ ThreadKilla!
DListed WEEK IN REVIEW!
I take a couple uppers, I down a couple downers
But nothing compares to these blue and yellow Purple Pills!
Thoses bitches cannot be trusted.
The names of the cookies didn't vary by region. They were the same throughout (i.e. peanut butter patties instead of tagalongs or whatever) ... They switched bakers this year so that's why the cookies' names are all different.
Yeah we be sellin' the prodda for $3.50 as well. They got rid of the chocolate-bottomed cookies and added Dulce de Leche ones. Escandalo! And the higher-ups swear that the peanut butter in the Girlie Scout cookies has no Salmonella.
BTW, Girl Scout parent/leader drama is as bad as PTA drama. Total Harper Valley PTA.
Oh shit! Why do I do this evey year! I always forget they go on sale in January until the end of the month. I need to find some fucking Girl Scouts stat!! I need some Somoas. Gotta go do some kind of google search. Since my daughter is not in elementary school anymore, I'm missing out!
蜘龍====================龍蜘
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http://2009.bloggies.com/
~VOTE FOR MK!~
I don't know about the rest of the cookies, but anybody who spends $4.50 on a box of Thin Mints is deranged.
Keebler makes an almost identical cookie called Grasshoppers that you can buy at any time of the year at your local grocery store for a little over $2 a pack.
Feel free to go nuts.
One thing I forgot to mention is that the variety of cookies available, as well as the names, varies by region. We used to have the chocolate and vanilla cookies, like 30 years ago, but we don't have those now. And we don't say Tag Alongs. In our area they are peanut butter patties, and the do si dos are called peanut butter sandwich. Years ago, the Trefoils were MUCH better because they were dusted with big sugar granules. Now they are crap and they call them Trefoils. I agree with everyone that says the GS cookies have gone downhill over the years. And this isn't the first time they have decreased the number of cookies in the boxes. I should know because I sold them myself 30 years ago, when they were GOOD and when there was a BUTTLOAD in each box, too!
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
I'm not buying them anymore.
I refuse to pay $4.50 for a box of 12 cookies.
For the same $4.50 I can get a pack of double stuffed Oreos which contain 36 cookies.
As a girl scout mom I remind you all that GS cookies can be frozen....support your local Girl Scout and remember the money truly does go back to the troop. Here in the Central Valley they are still 3.50 a box!
"Suddenly you realize that the only reasonable option is suicide. It's the only way to stop the pain. You see, life and death."
MK, I bloody love you.
“I ejaculate boiling venom, so I’d need to wear like fifty condoms.”
Love these cookies..I just think it sucks that you can only get them one time a year.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
I have been loving Hoedowns since I was a brownie myself (that is what tagalongs used to be called) and there are barely any in the box as it is anymore. It is a sad, sad day when we are being ripped off by the Girl Scouts.
Lane, I have been going to this high school for 7 years. I'm no dummy.
so now they're what? like 4.50 per box and you get less cookies, I say fuck the girlscouts/brownies and let the cubscouts have at em....poor lil hoes have to sell 85 boxes for a fucking keychain and 135 for a t-shirt...again fuck the girlscouts of america.
ever since the company that makes GS cookies sold out to another company-They Changed The Recipies!! same time they renamed them.
last year was the first year with the new shitty recipies.
Even the samoas, aka yummiest munchie food ever, don't taste as good.
this whole thing is going down hill.
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
Oh you know you want to buy cookies from my daughter. She's only sold a few boxes. Be a sport MK. ;-)
Submitted by MtlMama on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 3:42pm.
That's why the average American is 30% larger.
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
jojo71
How can they decrease the number of tagalongs in a box? There's only like 8 in each box as it is.
You bitches had better weep for me. In Quebec, we can only get the vanilla or chocolate cookies. I have NEVER tasted any other GS cookie.
Go on, weep!!!
=-=-="Come on, get happy!"=-=-=-
Submitted by kdracofan on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 3:30pm.
ew these cookies are gross
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DITTO. THe group sux a lot too!
ew these cookies are gross
I played gs in the 5th grade. I ended up being asked to leave the camping trip for participating in the toothpaste face-ing of a future slutbitch that peed the tent on the first fucking night. It was actually good for me & the 3 other girls that pasted the future slutbitch to get sent home because the pee wasn't really cleaned up very well & all the goodie goodie cunts that wouldn't help avenge the tent got to fall asleep to hot pee smell in the summer for the next week.
I ended up going all the way through school with the slutbitch that did it & never forgot to bring up the time she peed the tent in 5th grade.
Samoas rule!!!
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It sounds like I'll need to be drunk, stoned and suffering from a minor concussion to deal with this fuckery. MK - 11/24/2008
It's bad enough they keep raising the prices; no we're gonna get less for our money? F you, Girl Scouts!
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WHY WON'T YOU LET ME BE GREAT!!!
Submitted by paris herpes on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 2:38pm.
People always ended paying more for the cookies they didn't sell then the damn trip. It destroys the spirit, especially for the kids that can't afford it.
It's like those dumbass fundraisers where they get all the kids together and gave them the book of shit to sell and in the middle of the gym have all the games and money you can win if you sell so many things from the book. They pick some kids from the crowd to demonstrate so they get your all excited about it. One prize was a limo ride with so many friends to a game. It is complete bull. It made the kids who couldn't sell stuff feel horrible.
TV, so thaaaaaaats why everyone was so happy!
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
I was a brownie, never did anything fun. Made crappy arts & crafts that my mom refuses to throw out. But it was there I learned that I do not play well with others, because I don't like dumb groupie bitches.
And wtf at less cookies for the same price? Fuck you and your patches
those bitches!
Submitted by missy on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 2:45pm.
Ummm, that wasn't chicken...
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.
I've got two cases in my house right now, and no one to sell them to. I'm going to be broke and fat by the time this freaking cookie sale is over.
haha ME, yeah! every night! 2 sandwich cookies at dinner.. vanilla or lemon... I hated em.
I remember getting a piece of real chicken too once, like, with a bone. Everyone was PUMPED hahaha
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Submitted by joe shmoe on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 2:37pm.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 01/23/2009 - 2:35pm.
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I think you should use him to do some of your karate training on.
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Nah, Sumo wrestling
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I am the devil, and I am here to do the devil's work.