Matt Damon Hates James Bond
Enough with this Jason Bourne vs. James Bond shit! The minute Jason Bourne gets into some tight panties and shows us the fucking goods the way Daniel Craig did in Casino Royale, I'll consider moving over to Team Bourne. But in the meantime, I'm sticking with Bond. If Matt Damon thinks I'm a caca person, then he would be right. But not because I love Bond.
You see, Matt thinks James Bond is really gross. He told the Miami Herald (via UsWeekly), "They could never make a James Bond movie like any of the Bourne films. Because Bond is an imperialist, misogynist sociopath who goes around bedding women and swilling martinis and killing people. He's repulsive."
Paging Ben Affleck! You're needed at the nursery. Please carry Matt to his crib, stick a pacifier in his mouth hole and sing him a sweet lullaby. Just when his eyes start to close for the night, whisper in his little ear, "Honey, don't be jealous."
Seriously, who gives a fuck about all that shit? I'm not thinking about that when I'm watching Daniel Craig. I'm only thinking, "Take off your top. Shoot that bitch. Suck that olive. Shake that ass. Take off your top. Shoot that bitch. Suck that olive. Shake that ass..."
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He looks like a gentlemen, but in fact maybe not, I heard he created a dating profile at ^^^^^^^^^^richcupid net^^^^^^^^^^, but it is not confirm by him yet. Maybe he is looking for a young lady?
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George Clooney is an imperialist, misogynist sociopath who goes around bedding women and swilling martinis and killing people..but strangely Matt has no problem with that.
Screw that noise!
The new bond movies are RIDIC in comparison to the cinematography of the bourne movies.
Bourne is PURE amnesiatic sex -how he intuitively handles life threatening situations...Totally dig that average-joe appearance yet street savvy ex assassin shit!
& he DOESNT need to rely on the british intelligence and their gadget toys.
Ohh jason bourne<3...or david webb...or whatever<3
Matt hs 'tinymeat face' - small nose and fat cheeks.
Discuss!
I am soooo not fucking Matt Damon.
Team Bond!
There is nothing sexier than a man in a classically English tailored Savile Row suit (even though I think Craig actually wears Ford and Turnball & Asser in both films?).
Matt Damon is a hippie douche! Never mind Craig's rebuttal! Remember when Sean Connerey talked about smacking bitches up? I'd like to hear his rebuttal! That'll be some classic shit for the books!
------------------------------------------------------------- *I used to Love Celebrities, now I just love to Hate them!*
Submitted by cdawg on Tue, 01/27/2009 - 9:07pm.
listen, i may be a forward thinking liberal arts feminist woman, but nothing turns me on like a dirty martini and a man who isn't a GIANT pussy like matt damon.
sean connery bond = sex
matt damon in anything = explosive diarrhea
HAHAHAHAHAHA
You see, Matt thinks James Bond is really gross. He told the Miami Herald (via UsWeekly), "They could never make a James Bond movie like any of the Bourne films. Because Bond is an imperialist, misogynist sociopath who goes around bedding women and swilling martinis and killing people. He's repulsive."
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Actually, I agree with that. But I really hate those Bourne movies.
♥ ThreadKilla!
Happy Birthday, DLISTED!!!
I take a couple uppers, I down a couple downers
But nothing compares to these blue and yellow Purple Pills!
listen, i may be a forward thinking liberal arts feminist woman, but nothing turns me on like a dirty martini and a man who isn't a GIANT pussy like matt damon.
sean connery bond = sex
matt damon in anything = explosive diarrhea
be cool about fire safety
Submitted by Mike Hawk on Tue, 01/27/2009 - 7:06pm.
This arrogant bitch is so full of shit. If they offered his elitist ass the part of James Bond, he'd be all over it.
For the record, didn't Matt play a lying, murderous, sociopath that tried desperately to suck his best friend's dick in 'The Talented Mr. Ripley'? I guess being a 'martini swilling imperialist' is worse, though, huh?
Remember: Crying in public doesn't really make you less of a man. It does, however, make you more of a woman.
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Actually, I've always sort of disliked James Bond, too... though this is a WTF comparison on Damon's part. I think the difference between his character in Ripley and James Bond may be that the the James Bond franchise revels in that kind of behavior, that portrayal of a man. The character in Talented Mr. Ripley was a sick fuck and pretty much portrayed and seen as such.
Matts bitter, hes never been 007.
or said Shaken not Stirred so sexily as Sean.
http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/1859/why-did-james-bond-want-hi...
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BBC America had a Bond marathon on Sunday. Good, Sean Connery Bond! I watched "Dr. No", "From Russia With Love", and "Goldfinger".
To me Connery was the best Bond. Yes, he was a murdering, martini and Dom Perignon '53 drinking, smoking, womanizer. And he was GREAT!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
Submitted by Freak Speely on Tue, 01/27/2009 - 7:14pm.
It's on like Donkey Kong! Daniel Craig, on to you for rebuttal.
hahaha
Sorry, but that comment made me love Matt Damon a little bit. I can't believe he even knows the word "misogynist!" Kudos to him.
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Dlisted's a hellava drug.
We're on "Team Against Media-Whoring Husband-Stealing Baby Collecting Tatted-up Freakshows." - Stoney, 12/2008
It's on like Donkey Kong! Daniel Craig, on to you for rebuttal.
This arrogant bitch is so full of shit. If they offered his elitist ass the part of James Bond, he'd be all over it.
For the record, didn't Matt play a lying, murderous, sociopath that tried desperately to suck his best friend's dick in 'The Talented Mr. Ripley'? I guess being a 'martini swilling imperialist' is worse, though, huh?
Remember: Crying in public doesn't really make you less of a man. It does, however, make you more of a woman.
Bond isn't a movie character and neither is Bourne - both began as book characters, and Damon is absolutely correct in his assessment of Bond. If you read any of the the books, Bond goes on at length about his own superiority, his numerous rape fantasies - which are vivid and disturbing, and he's rather sociopathic in his treatment of other people.
I don't think Damon's dissing how much fun the movies can be, but Bond is written as a sleazeball. He just is.
And hotness is a matter of perception. I think Damon is fucking gorgeous, and he makes me jizz my underoos whenever I watch him. And smart guys do it for me. Craig has a great body (or did; remember those pics MK posted a while back?), but I think he's fugly as fuck in the face. Pass.
But I respect those who like Craig and Bond. Not trying to start shit, but stating my own opinion. And now I'm going to mainline some Percocet.
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"Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass." ~ Cordelia Chase
I would soo deepthroat Matt Damon's cock.
Ugh I effin love him, both him and Daniel are good looking. But I choose a Bourne movie over Jame's Bond, anyday.
I think both Bond films and Bourne films are pretty pedestrian, so there!
I've thought Matt was a fabulous THA (Typical Hollywood Asshole) since he made those smarmy "actuary tables" comments during the presidential campaign.
Matt dear, I might like those Bourne movies, but The Good Shepard was the most boring fucking shit ass movie I have ever seen.
And Bourne never had a woman named PUSSY GALORE or beat an asshole with metal teeth named JAWS so you ain't SHIT MUTHERFUCKER!
You are some asshole who got LUCKY as an actor, and that's about it.
William Shatner does not approve of Matt Damon and his prudish way of thinking.
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Candlejack is back!
Damon's such a troll. I think he's totally fug, while Craig is the total hotness! I concur MK, he should just walk around without his shirt on, he has a great bod!
STFU!!!
Because Matt played a genius at MIT, he thinks he is one.
-"Submitted by idiots drive me loco on Tue, 01/27/2009 - 3:57pm."
Haha!. That's what I was going to say, but I'm afraid I'll end up chained in the basment 10 miles under your basement. :)
Was he joking or not, then?. I want video footage.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
Actually, Daniel Craig is quite funny, and is not above mocking himself, especially for charity:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g4AgzQvFNZs
Like most intelligent people, he hate the lame Jay Leno type interviews, as he notoriously attempts to retain his privacy.
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Interviewer: You're playing one of the most famous characters in movie history. How come we don't see you in all the tabloids?
Daniel Craig: Because I don't want to be in them.
Oh by the way Damon, you really are quite fucking ugly. When you wife wakes up in the morning she probably slaps herself for hooking up with you. Stallone would have been a fucking upgrade.
Submitted by zomay on Tue, 01/27/2009 - 4:31pm.
thats what I thought too zomay
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Translation: I am a ugly fucker with a small dick and really need attention!
Shut the fuck up you whinny little fucker before I sick Bond on you to pummel your sorry little ass and big fucking ego.
Shaken, not stirred!!
"They could never make a James Bond movie like any of the Bourne films. Because Bond is an imperialist, misogynist sociopath who goes around bedding women and swilling martinis and killing people. He's repulsive."
Sounds to me like he was trying to be funny. He does have a sense of humor.
Remember this funny stuff?:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pd4o_hUXbfs
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Hi misssssy
how have you been girlfriend?
And Matt Damon is ugly, so there!
Submitted by Charles Manson on Mon, 01/26/2009 - 6:05pm.
THERE IS ONLY ONE FUCKING FULL PROOF GODDAMN CURE FOR THE BLUES. A FULL SIZED BOTTLE OF SMIFNOFF AND A TENDER FUCKING GODDAMN ROAST BEEF.
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Submitted by Hekki on Tue, 01/27/2009 - 4:21pm.
that was a sweet movie
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
tess89: You should check out "The Talented Mr. Ripley". Excellent bad guy, played well by Matt Damon. Plus it has Philip Seymour Hoffman and Cate Blanchett. Good stuff.
bond is a bad boy. isn't that the whole point? how do they even compare. NOT AT ALL!
Submitted by madam s. on Tue, 01/27/2009 - 3:59pm.
No, he won the Golden Buttplug. LOL
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WHY WON'T YOU LET ME BE GREAT!!!
Wow, suprising to see an actor of his caliber look down in judgement of a movie character. The morally corrupt ones are the best ones to play. Matt Damon is good but only playing the good guys won't do much for his range as an actor.
And Craig had sexy time with Sienna Miller.
I rest my case now yahanaaar!
Also. Craig was on a TV show here a while back (UK) being interviewed and he is not the most entertaining and engaging of characters. Matt in his defence is self deprecating and amusing. Craig... well, he takes the whole stiff upperlip a tad seriously.
Submitted by idiots drive me loco on Tue, 01/27/2009 - 3:57pm.
Incitatus, not that I am, in ANY way biased in my opinion that Daniel Craig wins. Always. And no, that sound you hear is NOT Daniel chained in my basement...
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I'm on my way over to your house...;)
Whatever! Bourne rocks. Bond, meh... Over. It worked in the 60s, 70s... maybe 80s but no more. Plus Daniel Craig spends the whole movie pouting. Damon is fucking hot in Bourne and the films are amazing and exciting. Bond is too cliche. And the new Bond who is all moody and crying over Vesper? Get over it! Connerywould have kicked your arse Craig. I like both as actors but Bourne wins. And also, stop getting stuff out of context people! He is just saying that Bond is an exhaggarated character where you have to suspend belief. So is Bourne but what made that trilogy popular is that it had a killer that had some actual feelings and was struggling against being programmed. The only think Craig struggles with is "will I look hot in this shot"?/
Team Bourne. Team Matt. Certainly not an overrated actor!
I'll take Bond over Bourne anyday!
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
I love the Bourne movies and some of the Bond movies, not all, some.
This was his comment on the character not the actors playing Bond.
If you think about it, take away the over tone of disdain, he's kinda right.
the early Bond films, Bond was a ho.
Then they turned into BMW commercials, 90 minute commercials.
I am not a Bond fan of today. Daniel Craig is awesomeness and all but, meh.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
VOTE 4 MK http://2009.bloggies.com/
Not a fan of Daniel Craig, but Matt is talking caca because Jason Bourne spends the whole movie killing people but without the fun. Is Jason Bourne less repulsive in that respect?
Besides, Daniel's Bond is not as promiscuous or as fun-loving as past Bonds. In the last movie he didn't even shag the Bond Girl...just did a lowly agent who got covered in oil and they did not even show them in bed! It was as chaste as a 40's movie. Bond movies suck these days and the Bourne flicks too.
www.groundhogdreams.com
Ahahha Albatross!
Didn't Brent Corrigan get an Oscar for that role?
Incitatus, not that I am, in ANY way biased in my opinion that Daniel Craig wins. Always. And no, that sound you hear is NOT Daniel chained in my basement...
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Interviewer: You're playing one of the most famous characters in movie history. How come we don't see you in all the tabloids?
Daniel Craig: Because I don't want to be in them.
I am really disappointed by these comments. I have met Matt on a few occasions, and he was always down to earth, and polite, not a hater.
That sucks if it is true. No one wants to think he likes whine with his cheese.
he gets sexier and sexier...
www.thatshideous.com
I love both franchises for different reasons, but if I had to choose, I'm a Bond girl all the way... Andfor Damon to be such a suckwad about it... what a loser! Lighten up, Damon. You're fucking actor - so shut up and ACT. Nobody cares what you think.
submitted by islandgirl on Tue, 01/27/2009 - 3:14pm.
You know, I said the same thing to my husband yesterday as we were watching "To Russia With Love". He was so offended that he turned around and belted me one. Then we had a Grey Goose martini and hit the sack. :)
hahaha, nice satire. Nonetheless, I love the Bond series. Particularly the early Bond movies, they were witty and not all about action (like the newer Bond movies and Bourne series). Bond may be misogynist but the reality of it is girls put up with all kinds of things for a good-looking, charismatic guy it's just the way things are. Just like guys put up with dumb, bitchy, good-looking girls. Beauty is power.