Who Is January's Hot Slut Of The Month?
Here we are again. Time really fucking flies when you're being cunty...and slutty....and drunky. It's the magic hour where we all do our monthly finger exercises by voting for Hot Slut of the Month. I feel this shit is going to be a cupcake-lined landslide, but you never know. Sometimes there's surprises. I'm still licking the wounds I suffered from the shock of Rojo losing the big title to Spaghetti Cat. But Spaghetti Cat is a worthy winner. He has already fulfilled his first duty by reading The Gold Digger's Guide to schoolchildren. We have to spread the Hot Slut philosophy early.
Anyway, any of these 5 whores could have the crown next year. Your choices are:
Ian Golder - Boxed macaroni and cheese's baby daddy!
DJ Lady Tribe - Pristine lady and professional pussy shot drinker!
Sergey Zverez - The most beautiful ladyman in Russia!
Stains - The magical dog with the ability to devour cupcakes with his eyes!
Aramis Fuster - The world's biggest liar! I mean, biggest witch!
Voting is in the sidebar to the right. The winning slut will be announced Thursday. Happy voting!
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Why in the fuck must an animal win EVERY TIME? Can we have a human being that wins instead of an animal that makes a stupid face or a stupid cat that does NOTHING!??! The prestigious Hot Slut of the Month contests are turning into shit that you would see on LOL CATS.
Stains will win by a landslide. And he deserves it.
Submitted by igolder on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 12:43pm.
Yay! Congratulations Ian! Mmmm, mac and cheese. Hey Walmart brand thick and creamy mac and cheese is fantastic. And it's cheaper than Kraft.
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I'm about to commit some crime on a bitch! ~Molotov Cocktease
Submitted by Molotov Cocktease on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 12:46pm.
Bahahahaha! Word to your hwat bitch momma. ♥
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I'm about to commit some crime on a bitch! ~Molotov Cocktease
I voted for Stains. He looks so sad, I can't help myself!
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"jim is our Dollar Store version of commingback." -christine the hoff 12/04/2008
STAINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He should be the hot slut of the year!
www.jqlounge.com
Why must the animals keep winning?! Animals are better than people, no doubt there, but I need a human hot slut to make fun of. That cupcake bitch better not win hsoty 2009...*side eye*
come on guys, give the REAL sluts a chance. The animals are just glorified props. They do nothing to earn their Hot slut Status. Spaghetti Cat? Propped up in a chair with some dry ass noodles. Stains? He just stares at a plate. THAT'S IT! The rest of those hoes are actively campaigning to be Hot Slut by doing sex to mac and cheese, putting their faces anywhere near a Rock of Love cooch, being frighteningly fabulous, and having the cure for AIDS and not sharing it with the world. VOTE RESPONSIBLY!
OK OK OK it looks like Stains is going to take this one but since I will probably never be up for Hot Slut of the Month again I have to at least try!
Thank you, Dlisted, for helping get me booked on Jimmy Kimmel Live.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=frtCRnnhtCA
Also, thank you all the special commenters on Dlisted who posted such fun things for me to read!
-Ian Golder
Dlisted LOVES ME.
come on ppl! lets stop voting for animals and for the real sluts! spaghetti cat already swiped last year's title from rojo, let's not make the same travesty this time around!
dj lady tribe for HSotM!
WOOT! STAINS BABY! STAINS!
Though I almost voted for that mutant mac and cheese guy. Stain's life is so much richer and fuller. Maybe MK can hook up Ian with Basement Baby.
~It’s not the fall that kills you; it’s the sudden stop at the end.~
*Douglas Adams*
Stains!
*pulling hair*....THIS IS THE HARDEST SLUT of the MONTH vote I ever had to do....I usually vote with my conscience....but realized I didn't have one...so I just masturbated and whatever made me feel sparkly...that is who I went with...you should do it..it is like a Magic 8 Ball, but in your pants....
I need to vote...
stains rules
Stains! Stains! Stains! woohooooo!
TITS - scrolling through the comments, I made the mistake of checking out Bimbo - he's weird enough but that song will give me nightmares for a year - thank goodness it's light out! Yikes!
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You call this a race? Why put the other "contenders" through this fuckery - it's painful to watch. Viva la Stains!!!
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My vote goes to Stains!
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Submitted by SkyBitch on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 1:59am.
OK, I just voted for 'Stains' and he's got this thing beat. If he had chola eyebrows, he'd have 100% of the votes though.
............
It's surprising that the witch hasn't gotten more votes, thems some spectacular brows! They could use some more sharpie styling though.
For me there's no decision to be made, my heart belongs to Stains... so do my nightmares, but that's another story.
Go Stains!!!!
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Know why they don't play Rock / Paper / Scissors / Pussy? Because NOTHING beats pussy! -- Toom Viltrax
OK, I just voted for 'Stains' and he's got this thing beat. If he had chola eyebrows, he'd have 100% of the votes though.
☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠
BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
What is THE HELL is going on in here?
☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠
BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
Fair dues. *she said, grudgingly*
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Yeah, that one's my ace in the hole.
My work here is done.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
Submitted by TITS on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 1:34am.
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UNCLE!! You need to stop, because I just wet meself.
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IG!!
OMFG! a Car? Canadian games show always had the shittiest prizes. edit - aaaah tournament of champions!
Okay... you're making me pull out the big guns now.
(note the appearance by sockys distance rellies)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moVmHzcawvw
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
TITS, are we having a game-off?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdsQgy3m0ZQ
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no kidding eh? It's still cute after all this time.
Julie! don't go!
star schtick: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nv8SAmO7lgM&feature=related
gawd but I love the internet.
later if I'm still up Party Game with Billy Van!
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
TITS, I would raise your link, but I'm too busy laughing. Wayne and Schuster? I'm having a flashback. HAHAHAHA!!
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IG I see your link and a I raise you.
My family reunion: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rR_5h8CzRcI&feature=PlayList&p=53194E7A8E...
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
Submitted by islandgirl on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 12:59am.
Submitted by TITS on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 12:57am.
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Again with the quilts. ;P
*
if anyone wants me I'll be standing in the corner.
*slowy drags feet*
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
Submitted by islandgirl on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 12:45am.
family reunion?
I would'a had you pegged more for an accordion and fiddle type girl.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
Submitted by TITS on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 12:57am.
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Again with the quilts. ;P
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Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:54pm.
Submitted by Manimal5 on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:18pm.
I once had a dog named Nads...as in go nads go!...not really.
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I once had a human named Live...as in go live go! Not really....*licking chops*...You humans make lousy pets anyway....
*
as opposed to cats? BWAHAHAHAHA.
Here - see this lovely upholstered chair back?
Look - see the scars on my arms?
Take a look at the state of this closet that was sacrificed to contain the litter box.
Not enough?
Let go look at the tippy top shelf of the linen closet where all the heirloom quilts are kept and play spot the vomit.
DECLAWING WOULD BE TOO GOOD FOR YOU!!!
defanging would be a start though.
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
It's got the body of a spider, and the mind of a baby.
johnnysgirl... :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-e1dYIWu2ME
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It's got to be Stains, because the wee beastie made me laugh so hard I almost fell on the floor in tears. Such restraint! Even my boyfriend - who makes fun of me for reading this blog - laughed his ass off.
Stains is the ruler!
Submitted by Manimal5 on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 11:18pm.
I once had a dog named Nads...as in go nads go!...not really.
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I once had a human named Live...as in go live go! Not really....*licking chops*...You humans make lousy pets anyway....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
can MK declare the winner NOW??
STAINS! by a landslide baby!! give that dog a cupcake!
;\=__=/o
I thought it would be a tough race, as that ladyman is almost as weird as the dog and the witch is almost as weird as the ladyman, but I was wrong huh?
STAINS for the block.
I once had a dog named Nads...as in go nads go!...not really.
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I can't recall there ever being such a clear leader for HSOTM.
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 10:40pm.
Submitted by islandgirl on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 10:38pm.
I once had a dog named Glands. He was very expressive.
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Would it be inappropriate to call a dog Scrote?
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I'll ask the hub and get back to you. BWAHAHAHA--- I keed!
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Submitted by islandgirl on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 10:38pm.
I once had a dog named Glands. He was very expressive.
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Would it be inappropriate to call a dog Scrote?
Submitted by LOVE CARROTTOP on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 10:34pm.
Is Stains fixed? I want to find a dog named Skids and hook them up.
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I once had a dog named Glands. He was very expressive.
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Is Stains fixed? I want to find a dog named Skids and hook them up.
STAAAIIINNNNS BAAABY YEAH! looking at that clip never gets old - creepy/weird ass dog!
Submitted by jiggywiddit on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 10:22pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 10:02pm.
Yes, I'm jelly. I do have fab brows, though. This dentist might have to be the next ex-mr. jiggy.
Is this forever? Is this real life?
*passes hookah to Tigger*
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I didn't mean you were a Jelly h8r of Aramis's brows, I meant all the whores that is votin' for that cupcake lovin' dog. Yeah, he's cute, BUT HE AIN'T GOT THE EYEBROWS YOU WHORES IS JELLY OF!!!
*Accepting hookah*....wait is this a pipe kind a hookah or a ho' kinda hookah, cuz "I can't see anything....Is this real life...you have four eyes..."
And you will marry that hot dentist over my drugged out tiger corpse, whore! HE'S MINE!!!! I don't care if he's 5'4", 300 lbs with more hair growing out of his ears and nose than on his head and sportin' a dick a chipmunk would snicker at, that man is MINE!!! Got it????
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
I didnt vote for Tribe cause she requested me as a friend to only whore it out in my MySpace bulletin board. Her mess is not hawt enough!
...............................
¿donde está machín?
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 10:02pm.
Yes, I'm jelly. I do have fab brows, though. This dentist might have to be the next ex-mr. jiggy.
Is this forever? Is this real life?
*passes hookah to Tigger*
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I am nuclear energy.--Kanye
I am totally for people getting the meds they need. --Hekki
Submitted by jiggywiddit on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 9:52pm.
Submitted by anna_p on Tue, 02/03/2009 - 9:49pm.
all the mother's animal circus cookies in the world couldn't cheer me up right now.
..........
Maybe it's time to go to that little boy's dentist.
Hop in, I'll drive. Tiggs, ya coming with?
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Is this real life? I can't see anything....
HELL FUCKIN' YEAH I'M COMING WITH...That kid's dentist is DA MAN!!!
And all you ho's STILL jelly over Aramis's eybrow action...ADMIT IT!
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...