Joaquin Isn't Faking It
The pictures of Joaquin Phoenix looking like a slobbery hairball coughed up by some beat down alley cat have already tortured your retinas enough, so I figured I'd post a picture of him when he was a hot piece. When he didn't look like you could find a crusted-over block of Philadelphia cream cheese under his dick. Oh, memories.
Not only has your eyes suffered burns from Joaquin's new look, but your ears also have battle scars if you listened to new his new "hip-hop" act. There was a lot of talk that his new act was just that....a fucking act. Some whore said it was all performance art. Joaquin is now swearing on his maggot-covered nutsack that his new rap career is authentic.
Joaquin told the Associated Press (via People), "There's not a hoax. Might I be ridiculous? Might my career in music be laughable? Yeah, that's possible, but that's certainly not my intention. I had a lot of dudes (MK says, 'KFed and MC Skat Kat don't count, Joaquin') come up and say, `We really respect you for doing it, putting yourself out there, and going with it. Because I think true hip-hop heads know that it's hard, it's going to be a hard transition, and people are going to be lining up just to make fun of me."
The recession is a living, breathing thing and Joaquin is pulling this shit? Well, at least he already has the crazy hobo look down when all his money dries up. Seriously, I just wish he would push his rap skills down in the basement where they belong and put on a clean, cozy straitjacket.
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He was hot! Too bad.
He's so incredibly delicious in that picture and perfect in To Die For. Oh Joaquin, why o why, you played Johnny Cash for christ sakes.
ugh oh god. i could use that bacon alarm clock now
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It's a huge hoax cooked up for a fake "documentary" film being made by Casey Affleck, but now everyone knows it's fake so the film has been defanged, as it were. My question is: who the hell does Phoenix think he is, Will Ferrell? Because Ferrell could pull this shit off, but not the massively unfunny Phoenix. Has Phoenix EVER been in any kind of comedy or satire? I mean, he was in "Parenthood" when he was 13 and still called Leaf, but he played that tortured, grim little masturbator, not anyone funny. This "now-I'm-a-rapper" thing has gone on far too long and is now just making him look like a weird freak (as if that homeless-guy beard and hairdo weren't enough).
"Might I be ridiculous? Might my career in music be laughable?"
Might I ask who in the hell talks like that?
Christian Bale needs to take his WHAT DON'T YOU FUCKIN' UNDERSTAND tour on the road, because Whack-Job 1969 Jim Morrison Wannabe here needz some lessonz in rappin'.
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Chicago area 5K race 2009: http://rallyforautism.com/
definitely some kind of PTSD ;p
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0006718/
boobxqueen - yeah its interesting you say that as he also reminds me of a male friend of mine who dated girls for years in college, including a friend of mine, but kept going in and out of the closet. Maybe we know each other...
God, I hope Xenu hasnt gotten to him! Noooooooooo
Submitted by Keane on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 10:50am.
Nah don't buy it. It's a hoax and they're just trying to keep the charade going for the sake of their dumb, self-indulgent doc. Hopefully it will never get broadcast and we'll all be spared the pain of watching it. Joaquin is one of the most precious people about his "craft" in Hollywood, he's a total arse in interviews, refusing to answer any remotely light-hearted questions. There's no way he would set himself up to be laughed at by seriously pursuing a career as a rapper!
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Yes, he is an ass..and doesnt do light-hearted, So why would someone with that kind of personality play a light hearted hoax on anyone?
Hes not the joking kinda guy. He wouldnt set himself up to be laughed at playing a prank either.
Hes gotta be on drugs on something.
He sort of has the look he had in To Die For. Sort of a "special" hot if you know what I mean. Bitch is nuts, what fuckery is this!?
"The master's tools will never dismantle the master's house." Audre Lorde
I still say there is some fucked up fuckery going on!
never though this dude was hot, but certainly this is a much more pleasant look than that nasty fur mess he rocking these days...
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we've all had our fair share of cock...it's nothing to shout about...
I always thought he was ugly. But now that we only have the Rick Rubin, Jr. version of him? Not so bad. (Which isn't to slam Rick Rubin - he's got talent to back up his look!)
Oh, and the scar is totally from corrective surgery for a cleft palatte. He just makes up a new crazy story any time anybody asks.
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Did somebody say PCP? I LOOOVES THE PEACEY P!!
Man, he was such a fucking hot piece. What happened?
I can't tell you sluts how many times I jerked it to "Quills". *fap fap fap*
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"I'm going to count to three, there will not be a four. Give me... the code." Hans Gruber, Die Hard
I need a new pair of panties just thinking about this.
Goddamn he was hot.
Joaquin is really a rappin mofo brotha from the hood, and we are just now finding out this?
Dang, I thought he was a white boy.
Didn't he learn anything from his brother, River???
He just seems to be on substances......
He's a good actor but a gum wrapper? NO!
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Madam, last I read MCSK was doing hentai:P
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2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"jim is our Dollar Store version of commingback." -christine the hoff 12/04/2008
Even MC Skat Kat was smart enough to get out of the pop/rap game and probably has a decent office job someplace now.
SO JOKEQUAIN you're saying that you MIGHT look like the UNIBOMBER if you weren't an actor???get back in the movies yuh BUM! :)heart you since Walk the Line.
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this whole drama has me walking around with a big WTF??? over my head. Hip Hop Heads? WTF?
You think that you the shit but you really just the potty
He's such a fucking LIE TELLER!
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
VOTE 4 MK http://2009.bloggies.com/
This whole situation vexes me. I'm terribly vexed!
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
When is HE gonna overdose?
I've never liked him or got him at all!
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://www.myspace.com/triston
Yes, it was very wise of Casey Affleck to attach his wagon to this loser's star.
Morbid. My dog's name is Morbid.
I'd rather look at hobo Joaquin than the picture above. He reminds me of my ex boyfriend who went homo on my ass. =[
Submitted by Chris Eccleston... on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 10:37am.
"We really respect you for doing it, putting yourself out there, and going with it."
If I hear "putting yourself out there" one more fucking time, I'm going to go all Christian Bale on a bitch.
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And furthermore, who's the asshole that's encouraging him to do this shit? Jay-Z? Diddy? Mr. Nuclear Power AKA Kanye? They deserve a bullet in the head too.
Whatever about this joker.
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"us"
Yep, he was once fairly doable. Now...meh, just nasty. Loved him in Return to Paradise, oh and Inventing the Abbotts. After that I didn't find him as hot, like in Gladiator- he bugged me. Maybe because he was a douche in it. Ah well.
Ashame that someone with good looks and pretty good acting chops went off the deep end.
HAHA MC Skat Kat ...lol
I forgot hot good he used to look. can we please go back to that? You can be a crazy methed-out rapper, but as long as you look good while doing it I won't mind.
More like a Crap Rapper.
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I almost gave two shits once, but I figured I'd better save one in case I ever gave a shit.
I have never got his "appeal"
Oh MK,can't you just let him be great?:)
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Hoax or not he will be forever lame to me.
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A place for book lovers and free thinkers.
He is cool. Actually, I'm kind of surprised he's picking up hot women online, seems "millionaire friends com".
I don't usually do this, mostly because I'm all stuck-up and uptight, but DAYUM he's fucking hot in this pic. and poser attitude aside...what I'd let him do to me would shock a day time lot lizard
*thinking this may have been tmi, but it stays*
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"We do not gnaw on our kitties"
Dr. Evil
Nah don't buy it. It's a hoax and they're just trying to keep the charade going for the sake of their dumb, self-indulgent doc. Hopefully it will never get broadcast and we'll all be spared the pain of watching it. Joaquin is one of the most precious people about his "craft" in Hollywood, he's a total arse in interviews, refusing to answer any remotely light-hearted questions. There's no way he would set himself up to be laughed at by seriously pursuing a career as a rapper!
sounds like bull$hit to me
Barf @ "When he didn't look like you could find a crusted-over block of Philadelphia cream cheese under his dick"
It can't be real. Have you guys even listened to his so-called performance?? That shit was so bad, I couldn't get past the 30 seconds mark. He can't be serious.
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"Love is in the air. And it's pooping on my head."
Submitted by No Words on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 10:38am.
He is completely off the deep end...he never had a chance with that messed up family of his, growing up in a sicko cult.
*cough* Connor and Isabella *cough*
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Please, you are making a German spectacle of yourself!
He is completely off the deep end...he never had a chance with that messed up family of his, growing up in a sicko cult.
"We really respect you for doing it, putting yourself out there, and going with it."
If I hear "putting yourself out there" one more fucking time, I'm going to go all Christian Bale on a bitch.
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Please, you are making a German spectacle of yourself!
jiggy: wills do!
have a good day, and if you need some amusement
CABIN FEVER!!!!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R6lY-EQrdA4
I wonder if Eminem is going to beat this guy down for stealing his hip hop glory story?
UGH he looks damn sexy in that picture and he was such a good actor..
clearly he's on the crack, i don't know what else could have brought this on.
Submitted by lizardbits1 on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 10:28am.
I'm jellis, liz. I'm snowed in today with nothing but this hot pic of joaquin and the spammers to entertain me.
Come back after work and keep me company, will ya?
xo :-)
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I am nuclear energy.--Kanye
I am totally for people getting the meds they need. --Hekki
Submitted by mike on Wed, 02/04/2009 - 10:26am.
it was the result of strawberries consumed during pregnancy
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or mushrooms maybe?
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I am nuclear energy.--Kanye
I am totally for people getting the meds they need. --Hekki