Programming Note
Beeker's secret love child Carla from Top Chef is going to hold shit down for me while I'm away. I have to quit this bitch early so that I can get on a plane and head back to my homeland of California for my mom's birthday extravaganza. Someone really have to be there to scream, "YOU OLD!" when she blows out her candles. And that someone is me! So, I most likely won't be posting anymore shit until sometime tomorrow morning. Then it will be ho business as usual around here.
If there's any breaking news, you heard it here LAST! As usual.
Until then, you better cheer Carla on to Top Chef victory tonight! This bitch has to win, just so we can see her eyeballs bust out of her head, do cartwheels in the air and then drop it like it's hot back into her sockets!
(Thanks to Mattchew and Tiredofbeinsexy for the gif!)
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You have a feral cat in your house? Haha, we have a lot of feral cats in the neighborhood. So much so that whenever I say "feral" my dog freaks out and runs to the door because he knows what I'm talking about. He loves kitties.
I'd so blow MK. He'd think again.
Fuckin' twat. feral twat. Just dealt with it. These sleep pills can't hit me fast enough.
Unisom ain't cutting it!
I have a personal blog that I pay for. Don't accept cheese adverts, but it's a lot about DListed. Fuck, feral cat just shit in corner. I hate my life!
Speaking of cute, I was looking at MK's Myspace pics (I'm bored as fuck) and the pic of him wearing the Aretha hat is soooo adorable. Too bad he's so fond of the cock!
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Thanks. Ya know, one time I was on one of those sex sites where you can watch vids and talk to everyone in the chatrooms (How I met the BBF) and someone had the handle 'Bored2Tears'. I laugh to this day. We both do. We used to go into the chatrooms and start trouble. Especially the losers in the NYC room. Ugh! Some were cute and sharing lasagne recipes, though.
Bored2Tears, my life now!
I'm SO glad I don't watch TV anymore.
Submitted by SICKITTEN on Thu, 02/26/2009 - 12:23am.
Aww! Thank you. That's the nicest thing I've heard all week (it's been a bit of a shitty week).
Speaking of cute, I was looking at MK's Myspace pics (I'm bored as fuck) and the pic of him wearing the Aretha hat is soooo adorable. Too bad he's so fond of the cock!
Submitted by SICKITTEN on Thu, 02/26/2009 - 12:23am.
Aw thanks Sickkitten...I've been posting at really wierd times lately...change of work hours.
I haven't seen this show but Carla looks like a winner to me.
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Ok,stop puffing the magic dragon.
I have to say- maybe this is mean b/c I really like her- but doesn't she resemble beaker from the muppets?
Submitted by Manimal5 on Thu, 02/26/2009 - 12:22am.
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You're another unending favorite on here
Just want to say Happy B-day to MK's mom.
Do you think momma K ever posts on dlisted?
Did Carla win or not?
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Ok,stop puffing the magic dragon.
Submitted by barelybeagle on Thu, 02/26/2009 - 12:05am.
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between you, Momus the Sarcastic and Stinkbutt, I don't know who is cuter. Great Avie. Could look forever. You're adorable.
Submitted by Uncle Ashtray on Thu, 02/26/2009 - 12:09am.
That's why I feel dumb about being mad! =D
Submitted by barelybeagle on Thu, 02/26/2009 - 12:05am.
I know, they basically judged the whole thing on the last meal, which was utter bullshit, because Stefan blew Hosea out of the water. I can't remember Hosea doing anything even remotely memorable throughout the whole season. I don't know why I'm so pissed about this!
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Don't be pissed. It's only a TV show. Everything on TV is make-believe.
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"...Soon we'll be away from here. Step on the gas and wipe that tear away...."
Tiger, yeah Marcel was from one of the earlier seasons and had the extreme 'Robert Pattinson on a bad day' hair. I really just hated that Sam guy at the time, so I was team Marcel. He had a lot of attitude and people seemed to hate him, but I thought he was endearing for some reason.
Happy Birthday to your Mom M.K.!
Submitted by devilgirl on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:50pm.
I cannot believe what douche bags the judges were. Tom Colicchio seemed to hate Stefan for some reason. Stefan won more challenges than anyone. The overall record should have counted in the end as well. Hosea should have been kicked out 2-3 weeks ago. The stuff he made always failed until the very last two episodes. Stefan made the best food and at least he had confidence in himself. If I am not mistaken, they usually bitch when someone isn't confident with their cooking. Asshole judges.
I know, they basically judged the whole thing on the last meal, which was utter bullshit, because Stefan blew Hosea out of the water. I can't remember Hosea doing anything even remotely memorable throughout the whole season. I don't know why I'm so pissed about this!
"Submitted by lanlan on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 10:23pm."
yes she's Stains twin!
who won??
happy BDay to MKs Mom!
><)))))*>
happy bday to MKs mom! and this chick on here looks like a camel, good god. i'm in california (the bay area) and i have no idea where MK is going but i would die if i saw him lol
in the united states alone, between 3 and 4 million cats and dogs are euthanized each year for lack of homes to adopt them. YOU can help stop this.. spay or neuter your pet. please don't breed or buy while homeless animals die! support animal shelters<3
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:30pm.
Yes and if a famine did hit, who would we eat if it wasn't for the fatty fatty bo batties?
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
A false eyelash should be like a secret abortion: discrete, so as not to attract Christian rage. - Ziggy S
I liked Carla and Ariane from jump street but thought the winner would be Stefan or Fabio for sure.
*****
~in need of something clever here~
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
Submitted by barelybeagle on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:39pm.
I really thought Stefan would win. He should have. I loved that he was so cocky but he had the skills to back it up. Plus I think he's hot. =O
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I cannot believe what douche bags the judges were. Tom Colicchio seemed to hate Stefan for some reason. Stefan won more challenges than anyone. The overall record should have counted in the end as well. Hosea should have been kicked out 2-3 weeks ago. The stuff he made always failed until the very last two episodes. Stefan made the best food and at least he had confidence in himself. If I am not mistaken, they usually bitch when someone isn't confident with their cooking. Asshole judges.
Carla Was Robbed! Her "Sous Chef" Screwed Her Over! BIG TIME!
AND! I am really PISSED OFF that Hosea did not even seem to "acknowledge" her as a competitor .... rather just Stefan!
I'll Never Watch Him! Lame Ass Can't even Make a Dessert!
Ridiculous!
Submitted by Cara on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:35pm.
Marcel is my favorite Top Chef ever with Stefan being a close second. So much douchey attitude should have been unstoppable! Hosea was just so... meh. Boring. I did feel bad for Carla though. :(
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Wait, now Marcel was not that short little creepy wolf boy lookin' virgin of a girly man, right? Cuz...ewwwwww...Although creepy virgin wolf boy could could his girly man ass off, so....Yeah, I guess I could see that.
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
I really thought Stefan would win. He should have. I loved that he was so cocky but he had the skills to back it up. Plus I think he's hot. =O
I found it interesting that the one who went and repeatedly comforted Carla was the "evil" Stefan - not the guy who ran around swiping all the good food in the kitchen...
*****
~in need of something clever here~
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
Marcel is my favorite Top Chef ever with Stefan being a close second. So much douchey attitude should have been unstoppable! Hosea was just so... meh. Boring. I did feel bad for Carla though. :(
Crap. And who names their child Hosea anyway? That's just one vowel away from, well, a hose.
Happy bday to MK's mom :)
To the rest of u evening horz: good evening.This tax season has been kicking my anus: I just left my office since 9 am!!! O well: one more week and I am back to being a lazy bum @ work.
Submitted by TITS on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:13pm.
Submitted by johnnysgirl on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 10:32pm.
@ Tiger Lilly -
I am a skinny ho too, and I've had more rude-ass people give me crap about it than I care to count. RUDE!!!
*
I always liked telling those types that I wish I *could* gain weight, I was SOOOOO tired of having to eat ALL. THE. TIME. hahaha. And it's true too!
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Yep, some people do NOT understand that some peeps ain't all that into to food. Yeah, us whores like to eat (at least I do), but when we done we done, period. It's like peeps who like to get their drink on every once in a while, but when they done, they done. No one questions that. No one says to them "you don't drink enough"...When they done, they done.
I mean, being a thin ho actually has given me more compassion for overweight ho's. You are what you are. What you need to STRIVE to be is healthy, EVEN if that means doing shit you don't want to do (drinking that NASTY ASS Ensure Plus for me when I was a young whore. ugh...). Other than that, us whores are meant to be different and have all different body shapes.
Think about it. If we were all skinny whores and a famine hit, most of us wouldn't survive. On the other hand, if we were all fat whores, we'd be subject to obesity and diseases linked to it. We whores is supposed to get our whore asses on with as many skinny, fat and in between whores as we can to keep future generations a healthy balance of whoredom...
And that's your DListed Evolutionary Sexucation lesson for tonight...
Professor Tiger signing off...
*taking scholarly looking glasses off tiger face, exiting library*...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Hosea only won because he cheated on his girl back home with that other loser that couldn't cook - producers gave him a big fat thank you for the extra plotline.
reality shows are such a fix and the ones on Bravo seem to be the worst about rewarding the real talent.
*****
~in need of something clever here~
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
Submitted by TITS on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:25pm.
Was that you or the beagle?
LOL, that was me in response to the end of Top Chef. The beagle is currently asleep... he's either sleeping, eating or pooping at any given time.
wow, she actually does look like beaker... HOT
www.lowbrowsophisticate.com/category/taunting
Submitted by barelybeagle on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:17pm.
AAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!
*
Was that you or the beagle?
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
A false eyelash should be like a secret abortion: discrete, so as not to attract Christian rage. - Ziggy S
Submitted by Sorceressss on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:22pm.
I'm, fucking PISSED that Hosea won. Dammit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ME TOO! Anyone but HIM!
He sucks!
Top Chef ended the season the same way a lot of Bravo shows do. All I have to say is (Gretchen, are you listening?) girls, NEVER trust another broad!
I'm, fucking PISSED that Hosea won. Dammit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HELLLLLOOOOOOOO!
i live in nyc and just flew out to the west coast for mi mums birthday too. i'm originally from california but am currently in las vegas...woot!
happy birthday to your mum!
Submitted by Uncle Ashtray on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:17pm.
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:16pm.
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Feb. '08
Looks like you just missed it!
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Damn! I'm going to bed and pout.
Actually, I am really going to bed.
Night, d-sluts.
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
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AAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHH!
Submitted by Momus the Sarcastic on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:16pm.
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Feb. '08
Looks like you just missed it!
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"...Soon we'll be away from here. Step on the gas and wipe that tear away...."
Submitted by Uncle Ashtray on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:10pm.
Myth Busters ROCKS!!!!!
Although I'm so disappointed that "Human Spontaneous Combustion" was busted!!!! I was gonna use that as my alibi when my ex suddenly 'sploded!
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WTF! When did that happen???? I suggested that myth in March of '08!
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My avatar is my 27-pound Maine Coon furkid named Mozart. Lying next to him is a standard-sized cat.
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Submitted by johnnysgirl on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 10:32pm.
@ Tiger Lilly -
I am a skinny ho too, and I've had more rude-ass people give me crap about it than I care to count. RUDE!!!
*
I always liked telling those types that I wish I *could* gain weight, I was SOOOOO tired of having to eat ALL. THE. TIME. hahaha. And it's true too!
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
A false eyelash should be like a secret abortion: discrete, so as not to attract Christian rage. - Ziggy S
Submitted by Uncle Ashtray on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:10pm.
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Myth Busters ROCKS!!!!!
Although I'm so disappointed that "Human Spontaneous Combustion" was busted!!!! I was gonna use that as my alibi when my ex suddenly 'sploded
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AAHAHAHA!!! *hides remote*
Submitted by islandgirl on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 10:50pm.
I totally forgot about it! The hub is watching Myth Busters, and it's not worth my life to ask him to change the channel. It'll be on Bravo tomorrow though, I'm sure. I'd like to see Carla win.
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Myth Busters ROCKS!!!!!
Although I'm so disappointed that "Human Spontaneous Combustion" was busted!!!! I was gonna use that as my alibi when my ex suddenly 'sploded!
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"...Soon we'll be away from here. Step on the gas and wipe that tear away...."
Submitted by Reese on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 11:00pm.
Island girl:
Why did Carla listen to stupid Casey?
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Reese, I don't know--- I need details. And fast!! :)
Submitted by jiggywiddit on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 10:53pm.
spirit guides? are we talking about voodoo cupcakes...
Island girl:
Why did Carla listen to stupid Casey?
I'm so sad.
"It's a Kanye West!" - Kanye West
Submitted by johnnysgirl on Wed, 02/25/2009 - 10:32pm.
@ Tiger Lilly -
I am a skinny ho too, and I've had more rude-ass people give me crap about it than I care to count. RUDE!!!
The bottom line is that it's shitty to make remarks to people about their appearance. Unless you want to give a compliment, STFU. (And "I hate you because you're so skinny" is NOT A COMPLIMENT, although the world is awash with insane bitches who think it is.)
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Yeah, I hear ya. I think I've learned to accept that a) people REALLY do have different ideas on what is and is not beeyootayful...and thank god, cuz not all of us ho's is blonde haired, blue eyed and 5'9 b) some people really have no tact, they mean no harm, they are just fucking clueless and you need to treat them as such c) they's just some mean ass mother fuckers out there and that's all you need to know about them types d) the prejudice against the skinny is just as alive and and well as the prejudice against the fat, and while both have a kernel of truth (or more) to them, it's really not fair to paint the whole population with one fat or skinny brush e) Yep, I'm gonna say it JELLY H8RS do exist. Flat chested, flat assed bean pole types gonna hate on the body types of peeps look like JLo, Kim K, Drew Barrymore, ScarJo...I ain't talkin' 'bout hatin' on the celebs themselves cuz that's a must, I'm talking about they bodies...AND chunky, outta shape lumpy lumpsters gonna hate on the body types of Giselle, Nicole Ritchie, Kate Moss, Kate, Hudson.
It's about time we whores ALL us whores look at women like we look at dessert. I don't fault you for going for the lemon mergengue pie, but I'm totally going for that chocolate raspberry cheesecake, cuz that's how men see that shit. *Yeah, that skinny blonde bitch you bangin' is hot, but give me a dark curvy honey and I'm happier than a pig in shit..."
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...