Happy Friday The 13th!
It's Friday the 13th which means your ass better stay away from the evil today. Wait, that includes this blog. I mean, stay away from dark-sidedness. Ugh. That also includes this shit. Okay, just don't cross a Jacko, an Olsen, a CHERYL BURKE, a Katherine Heigl, an UGG, a CROC or a Vadge and you should be safe. Better yet, don't even look at these pictures of Jacko trying to keep his nose in check while leaving a medical center in Beverly Hills yesterday.
You must resist the urge to slather your monitor in cocoa butter in hopes that Jacko's crocoskin will soak some of that shit up. Seriously, it's not normal that you could use his hands to sand the fuck out of a splintered wooden table. I hope he doubles up on the gloves when he holds the children.
Happy Friday the 13th everyone! If you liberally cleanse your insides with the nectar of the gods (aka vodka) today, everything will be alright!
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I want to see him in concert...even though he is odd his music is awesome.
xoxoxoxox
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
is it me, or does that pinky look a little bit like a penis?
Hee hee - reading the word "crocoskin" made me think of the ferocious...CROCOSTIMPY!
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The milk is straight up fucking filthy! -MK
no way that dude in london was mike's double. that was the real mike! the way he acted and talked...oh yeah, that was him!
He has the hands of a 75 year old white woman. What the hell happened?? This is not a healthy person...even the texture of his nails is off. And he thinks he's going to tour? In what universe?
Random KD fact of the day: I was born on a Friday the 13th.
Mwahhahahahahahaaaa
I am not superstitious, but shit always happens out of whack. One Friday the 13th, it was my birthday, I'd finished working in the garden and found out that my water had been shut off. Stinking on my birfday. *sigh*
*little sock monkey sniff* Walking corpse.
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Submitted by Miss Thang on Fri, 03/13/2009 - 12:16pm.
Some of Jackson's songs are really touching (no pun intended) like Human Nature, Man in the Mirror, and my personal favorite Gone Too Soon. He has one of the most beautiful voices ever, and was an amazing performer. I'm not gonna lie, I always got goosebumps watching him on stage. He was magical. I can't think of anyone that comes close to his level of performing. No one.
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I know. Shame hes out of his skull batshit insane now.
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
He was like, well it's hard to say, but it sounds like he's leaning towards the homo side.
Some of Jackson's songs are really touching (no pun intended) like Human Nature, Man in the Mirror, and my personal favorite Gone Too Soon. He has one of the most beautiful voices ever, and was an amazing performer. I'm not gonna lie, I always got goosebumps watching him on stage. He was magical. I can't think of anyone that comes close to his level of performing. No one.
HAVE SOME DUMBASS WATER. - Charles Manson!
That's fucking brilliant Stoney. I want him to answer one about my ex-husband.
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
Haha I totally sent MK a drunken email once. It was pretty bad, lol. I also sent him an email listing all the reasons I believe my coworker's son is gay and asked him to comment "gay" or "not gay". Oh yeah, I totally did it.
Stoney, I treasure those mails the most. "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT BITCH? SIT DOWN!"
Once a month or so the poor bastard gets a mail from my ass very late at night that starts with, "Well I haven't graced you with a drunken mail in awhile so...blahblahblah."
Snow, the horse was parked in my...?!
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
I seriously believe MJ does not have a nose.
Once I was in a doctors office and this man came out and didn't not have a nose! Just a hole there. No shit! Maybe MJ has done waaaay too much blow and it fell off. yeah that's it...
And yes he totally uses a fucking double.
Especially when he announced his tour in London the other day. That was not MJ! Fakest tour of all time. Lip synching AND a Michael double.
Hehaw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 03/13/2009 - 12:01pm.
*gives carrot gigantic wedgie*
*runs off like tard*
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Your Michael Phelps impression RULES.
Submitted by bitchette on Fri, 03/13/2009 - 11:58am.
you hors are real friends with MK?
he talks to you?
**
he replies to emails. not every time but sometimes...
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Actually, I kinda stopped emailing MK all the time because I would send him a story and he'd reply back "TWENTY WHORES ALREADY SENT THAT SHIT TO ME YOU DUMB FUCK!" and then I would feel bad for wasting his time, lol.
*gives carrot gigantic wedgie*
*runs off like tard*
whats up my lovely ho-bags?!?
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
EEG: oh sorry, when you typed GUNS I read GUYS. duh. MMMMM did he keep the hat on?
where did he park his horse?
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
MK could call me anything he wants - I wouldn't be offended.....lol
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why would you lie about something dumb like that?
why would you lie, about anything at all?
-Vampire Weekend "Oxford Comma"
Snowy, les duh?! For sexy times!
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
Stoney my darling, come enjoy a hot dog with me.
you hors are real friends with MK?
he talks to you?
*jelly*
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
Stoney-
being irish is always convient
'I'm Irish' also means 'I drink frequently"
hahhaahhaaa!! :)
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
EEG so why was he there?
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
Yes. Except not to happy with guns in my house/bedroom.
Stoney it makes me tingly when MK calls me a hobag, whore or dumb fucking bitch.
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 03/13/2009 - 11:52am.
tuesday, but parties are starting this weekend.
hmm.... i should've said that. next time.
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
CORNED BEEF AND CABBAGE BITCHES!! It's on Tuesday Stoney.
And I'm only a smuge of Irish. I think. My ancestors were such whores that basicall, take Europe but it in a blender then sprinkle some american indian on top.
I am a complete mutt.
Ok Truce.
*flips hair obnoxiously and rolls eyes*
Keeding.
Not until posting here, did I ever take being called a whore and a stupid bitch to heart.
Submitted by bitchette on Fri, 03/13/2009 - 11:49am.
You totally should have said that.
When is St. Patty's Day? I'm Irish too. When it's convenient.
EEG oh ok, dressed up like the Due South dude, LOL hot!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
ok Stoney- truce? I don't want to fight with you. I'd like to see the happier Stoney again. I sincerely hope that things improve for you.
*hugs*
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why would you lie about something dumb like that?
why would you lie, about anything at all?
-Vampire Weekend "Oxford Comma"
Yeah yeah I'm used to being the bad guy, I can take it.
You know, MK calls me a fucking idiot and a stupid whore daily, and I never take offense because I know he's joking. I guess I should specify that I'm not serious when I duh someone.
ugh.. is this why i'm feeling throwy today? maybe not throwy, more depressed. my dumbass boss asked me if i'm doing anything for St Paddy's day (which i LOVE being irish and an alchy). I'm like NO BITCH. I'm fucking broke. you know exactly how much money i'm not fucking making!
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
Snowy,
Go goggle RCMP and prepare for panty cream.
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
WTF is full serge? Is it like full on hard on? LOL
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
I agree....I am fine, and not angry at all. I am explaining in a calm way.
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why would you lie about something dumb like that?
why would you lie, about anything at all?
-Vampire Weekend "Oxford Comma"
Paris and Stoney you need to share a bong.Dlist whores spread love not hate among each other.
Jesus Ladies! Would it help if I describe the tall handsome Mountie who left my house this morning in full serge?
Mmmmmmmmm. Yum.
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Mrs. K. squeezed my ass. I can die happy.
Not at all. But we have always been decent to each other here (you and me) and today to "duh" me, was just not nice. Sorry. I didn't like it, and felt the need to respond.
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why would you lie about something dumb like that?
why would you lie, about anything at all?
-Vampire Weekend "Oxford Comma"
I didn't know this place was the be all and end all of politeness. What are you, the fucking manners popo now?
*takes out entire thread with dildo bomb*
You have no idea.
Submitted by NaNoop on Fri, 03/13/2009 - 11:27am.
i believe you the show was awsome! my sis told me the same. i was mad i didn't get to see it live.
saw many of his concerts but i'm sure seeing one live would totally blow me away.
i guess i wouldn't cry either (although i am very emotional). i'd prolly be moved just like you :)
then I suggest you take it. I understand that you are going through a hard time now, but you have been really aggressive lately. Just saying.
No. You didn't "just say it". You were rude.
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why would you lie about something dumb like that?
why would you lie, about anything at all?
-Vampire Weekend "Oxford Comma"
By the way, calling someone miserable is a good way to be the actual one starting shit.
I just pointed out the fucking obvious about the 13th. Fucking sue me.
Oh sorry, I haven't had my morning Zoloft.
Submitted by Stoney on Fri, 03/13/2009 - 11:19am.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 03/13/2009 - 10:20am.
Hard to be miserable when your head is about to explode with narcissism
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yeah ok Stoney. Go start shit with someone else. That seems to be your hobby for the past month or three.
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why would you lie about something dumb like that?
why would you lie, about anything at all?
-Vampire Weekend "Oxford Comma"