Booooo!!!
A judge has taken back the Blohan's arrest warrant that was issued this past Friday after she reportedly fucked up her probation by not showing up to a booze ed class. Blohan's lawyer apparently proved to the court that her absences were excused. Her lawyer said that she will enroll in another class and show proof of it on April 3rd. Cut to Blohan sucking on the judge's genital lips. That's how "misunderstandings" get cleared up.
After all that shit, this is what we get?! Boo! Where's the Thelma & Louise-style car chase? The shoot out at her crack house of choice? Where's White Oprah parading the streets in croco-tears?! I want my money back! Foolery! You don't fuck with a bitch like that. I was promised cokey-filled drama and that's not what I got.
The judge needs to examine the picture above. Blohan has to be breaking all sorts of international laws here. I mean, that baby now has a terrible case of coke breath from breathing in Blohan-laced oxygen. Issue another warrant and throw the cokey in the chokey!
Source: TMZ
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Submitted by Team Valtrex on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 9:49pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 9:47pm.
Like, she was BUSY, ok?! With her really imporant work!
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Not showering qualifies as work? Consider her the CEO of bad hygiene.
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It does if you make a habit of letting people photograph you like that! She's, like, the voice of this generation of this, like, decade. She puts her PRIDE A-FUCKING-SIDE! Ok?!
♥ ThreadKilla!
With my super lawyer powers, I can rid our town of cats so our kids can NEVER get high again! Mr. Broflovski, South Park
A DListed Youtube Gallery
Submitted by angel_i on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 9:47pm.
Like, she was BUSY, ok?! With her really imporant work!
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Not showering qualifies as work? Consider her the CEO of bad hygiene.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Like, she was BUSY, ok?! With her really imporant work!
♥ ThreadKilla!
With my super lawyer powers, I can rid our town of cats so our kids can NEVER get high again! Mr. Broflovski, South Park
A DListed Youtube Gallery
I'm dying to know what the excuse was. I'm guessing she had food poisoning from eating a bad taco.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
The flower witled and died right after that photo was taken.
xoxoxoxox
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
Poor kid probably Od'd from Hohan's breathe right afterwards. SICK!
"The master's tools will never dismantle the master's house." Audre Lorde
Her lawyer is so good that Lindsay is now permitted to satisfy her booze ed through bartending school.
I want to know who is peeing in a cup for this girl. there is NO FUCKING WAY she is sober.
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"I think she's an ass...I think she's ugly. And I think she's a disgusting human being..."
-Anne McCourt, 81 years old, re: Paris Hilton (was filmed and is now pissed she will be on a reality show )
She may think she is getting away with it now.
Well! My daughter happened to miss her class and when she walked out of the office after re-scheduling it, they arrested her ass and let her sit in jail all weekend before "clearing up her misunderstanding". FUCK LOHAN!!! FUCK all these stuck the fuck up celeb's who get away with so much shit... and FUCK THE L.A. COUNTY JUDGE WHO LET HER GO!!!!!!!!
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It sounds like I'll need to be drunk, stoned and suffering from a minor concussion to deal with this fuckery. MK - 11/24/2008
I know, dallas!!! Supposedly they called the damn buzzer several times before Jack would let them in. Fucking cokewhores!
Tmz also reported that Lohan had a driver take her to Jack Nicholson's house last night! When the driver pulled up to the gate, he scratched the wall............It sounds as though Jack did not know she was coming and was not at all amused by the whole situation!
Allknowingone ~ AA and NA are very effective programs however, when one gets forced in to either, sometimes it does not work. Just like when someone goes to rehab............if they are forced to go then sometimes it takes more than once. Those that see that they truly have a problem and suurender to IT, get it!
alknowingone on
my neighbor confessed to me that he has a drug addiction and im avoiding him like a plague because he is a user and sick
Frankly my dear, I don't give a Damn!! "Rhett Butler"
What's really sad, in this USA of ours, is that there are no other treatment options for alcoholics and/or addicts besides the court mandated booze ed classes and the 12-step programs. Neither approach has worked, yet as a country, we keep streaming our offenders/addicts into both. Sure, there exists other programs such as SMART recovery and Rational Recovery, which are different than the 12-step approach of AA and NA but courts don't offer them as a diversion from doing time in jail like they do with AA, etc. In many states, parole and/or probation requires AA/NA attendance and I think there should be some sort of alternative to a progam that only works for less than 5% of the people who use it.
I know this post is a bit off-topic but seeing Lindsay Lohan's legal problems and post-rehab, probationary behavior just reminds me of how backwards and naive we are in this country in regards to the way we treat our addicts. If there are any non-USA peeps out there reading today, how does your country treat and educate your offending alcoholics and drug addicts? Do you force them into 12-step programs that don't work? There has got to be a better way!
Scene: Psychiatrist's couch, June 2030
This baby, now a grown-up, lies quivering on the analyst's couch.
Doctor: Well, tell me about this nightmare.
Patient: It's horrible, doctor. Like something out of Saw or Parent Trap. It's this gigantic looming face making cooing noises. And the smell! I can't get it out of my head. It's a mixutre of coke, spray tan, and Juicy Fruit gum. It's hideous. Please, doctor, make it go away! *cries*
Doctor: *writes in notebook* "Firecrotch has tainted yet another pure mind."
I'm sorry. You'll need a lobotomy to firmly erase that image.
Patient: I know who killed me! Mean girls! GAAAAAAAAAAA!
♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀
Chicago area 5K race 2009: http://rallyforautism.com/
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. —Groucho Marx
And and and, we'll all miss out on a Michael Lohan Revelation Rant.
Speakin' of, whatever happened to the illegitimate Lohan?
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
i bow to you, illustrious knight of the good wit, m.k
u so fkn funny
i bow to you, illustrious knight of the good wit, m.k
u so fkn funny
Hohan will do anything to sell her fake spray tan!
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Pick up your socks and drop your slots, we're going to a party.
She looks like Jack Nicholson with a red wig. Hey! She could become a professional Phoebe Price impersonator with those fake ass cheeks!!!
Falkor: I know, I feel sorry for her, she doesn't have any kids (I read the Mirror article) she found out about the tumor when she had a miscarriage
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:39pm.
have you heard about this?
http://news.aol.com/health/article/dying-woman-plastic-surgery/381780
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Oooohhh...
If she has kids and this is what she decides to spend her money on...shes despicable....even still, she could give it to charity or something...seems unbelievably selffish, she should go out with people remembering her good charity...not how she look a little bit like demi moore.
Then again she has brain cancer so maybe its affecting her ability to reason....
Call CPS on the mother.You just know that her tabloid addled brain somehow feels Lohan worthy of worship.If ever there was an argument for breeding certification...
i know nitty, it's some crazy sh*t!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:39pm.
have you heard about this?
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Snowy. I'm flabberghasted. To think, I'd like to leave 55 grand as some sort of legacy to the ones I loved and to others who'd benefit. Fuuuuuuuughhhhhk.
______________________________________________________
Just because no one understands you, doesn't mean you're an artist.
I'd say all this fuckery would come back to bite her in the ass but life has kicked her ass Chris Brown style for the past couple of years anyway.
-.-
The internet, where the men are real men,
the women are real men, and the children are the FBI.
have you heard about this?
http://news.aol.com/health/article/dying-woman-plastic-surgery/381780
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
I never got caught drinking in college. But I did cuss out the elderly security guard and they made me write him an apology letter and work in the campus security office for two weeks. I just tooted around on the golf cart and gave my friends rides.
Fucking bitch. Mother fuckers like her get away with this shit while anyone of us would be in jail right now with a big convict cock up our no-no holes.
Well maybe that's not so bad after all.
@falkor
they dont give you the option of jail. it was in nevada. they have 24 hr drinking but they are just OUTRAGED when someone gets a dwi. my judge got a dwi 4 months after me : )
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"gimme back that filet o fish, gimme that fish. what if it were you hanging up on this wall, if it was you in that sammich you wouldnt be laughing at alllll"
Submitted by Provolone on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:24pm.
Submitted by Falkor on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:17pm.
i had to do the booze ed class (for a dwi) once a week for 6 months. every session cost 37$, and the 68 year old guy who got 8 dwis in the 70's would ask us what we did the past week. its bullshit on top of fines that i had to pay 900$ for these 'classes'. we had to make a COLLAGE!!..nothing sadder then seeing a 40 year old man talk about his life in collage form.
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Deeyam! How much jail time do u have to do if you dont take the classes? I think I would rater go to jail for a month or two then put up with all that bullshit!
In college I didnt have to pay for the class..I just had to go or I would be kicked outta the dorms, so not having a place to live versus going to some class for an hour for a couple weeks..I choose the classes, but it didnt make the bullshit any less bullshitty!
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:22pm.
LOL just don't let it happen again!
Any mother who willingly lets her kid around Lohan should probably be investigated by CPS.
And I agree with Devilgirl - she's pure entertainment!
______________________________
Everybody sucks. Shut up.
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:19pm.
may be this bebe will bring out Blohan's maternal instincts and she can introduce the turkey baster filled with Mark Ronson's sperm to their nightly repotoire.
God forbid! Then she'll be the next White Oprah pimping out her spawn.
“You a motherfucker and ain’t all that.”
Submitted by Romai on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:24pm.
Not that I expected her to spend any real time in jail but damn, they owe us a mugshot at least!
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WORD! We were robbed, dammit!
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Just because no one understands you, doesn't mean you're an artist.
Jellis h8rz! Poor Lindsay is a tortured, misunderstood artist! If she says she hasn't been drinking or drugging, it's good enough for me. THOSE WEREN'T HER PANTS! Be adequite, y'all!
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"So? I'm intellectual and stuff."
"You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue, and stuff."
Submitted by Falkor on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:17pm.
i had to do the booze ed class (for a dwi) once a week for 6 months. every session cost 37$, and the 68 year old guy who got 8 dwis in the 70's would ask us what we did the past week. its bullshit on top of fines that i had to pay 900$ for these 'classes'. we had to make a COLLAGE!!..nothing sadder then seeing a 40 year old man talk about his life in collage form.
+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
"gimme back that filet o fish, gimme that fish. what if it were you hanging up on this wall, if it was you in that sammich you wouldnt be laughing at alllll"
Not that I expected her to spend any real time in jail but damn, they owe us a mugshot at least!
Lock her ass up and send her to a womens prison, then we wont have to see or hear her.
Boo indeed. I was hoping this slut would get shanked.
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What's happened to the American dream?
It came true. You're lookin' at it.
Submitted by Stoney on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:16pm.
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:13pm.
I know you didn't care... How could I think that atrocitty about you?
He Dicho! caso cerrado!!
What a fucking slap to the wrist. Bullshit. Send this bitch to the clink!
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Making Al Pastor Burritos for M.E.
P.S.: Fuck you, Sarah Palin:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=yFdijgMytUA
Need some "Chocolate Thunder?" Click here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MK0d2P9Hbv4
may be this bebe will bring out Blohan's maternal instincts and she can introduce the turkey baster filled with Mark Ronson's sperm to their nightly repotoire.
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"I think you will know what I mean when I say this, is that Adam Lambert makes me feel like a young girl who has just discovered gay boys, and wants more" TWOP
Booze Ed??
What more does she need to learn about Booze? ;p
I should teach there
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0006718/
is in these up to his neck
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1375754/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1107394/
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1204966/
Submitted by Provolone on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:14pm.
booze education is a farce! who the hell needs to get educated on something they've been doing everyday for years and years
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I had to take some drug education classes in college cuz i got caught with some booze in the dorms and it was laughable! i would got out right after and get high and drunk just to spite that stupidity....
Submitted by shut the smurf up on Mon, 03/16/2009 - 12:13pm.
Hey, don't get me wrong. *I* don't care. But they are supposed to, right?
You know that kid's thinking "ew.. crack ho cooch breath".
Could you imagine how fucked up that baby would be if Blohan pulled a Salma Hayek on it and gave it a taste of her 80 proof teat?
***Welcome to the Thunderdome***