Go Andre Go!
Andre 3000 should change his name to Andre 3000mph (womp womp), because he was arrested in Georgia on Saturday for getting a little too excited with his gas pedal. All Hip Hop says Andre was speeding down a highway outside of Atlanta in his Porsche and he might have been trying to travel through time or some shit, because bitch was going 109mph in a 65mph zone! And no, he didn't tell the police he was rushing home to get his dick sucked ala Charles Barkley.
Andre was arrested because police said driving that fast is an accident waiting to happen. He was put in handcuffs, shuttled down to the station, booked, had his glamour shot taken and then was released on $1,200 bail.
109mph?! Don't try this at home, but when I was 16 and stupider than I am now (hard to imagine, right?), I decided to see how fast my janky ass Mitsubishi Mirage would go on the freeway. When I got to around 95mph, this little ass bitch was heaving and about to collapse. I thought the doors were going to come flying off and the tires were going to collapse. It's like my car just left rehearsals from Dancing with the Has-Beens. If I would've pulled an Andre by hitting 109mph, that car would've quit this bitch! The motor would've straight up, opened the hood up and jumped out!
And Andre gets 1 out of 10 stars for that boring ass mug shot. Give us something! Although, his mole is trying to give us a little something. It's speaking to me.
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i can say this now that i drive like grandma in the slow lane, letting anypne pass me not caring at all...
one time i got my little german car up to 140 mph on some two lane road in the middle of nowhere.
i just needed to know if it could.
it could.
the end.
now i drive the speed limit and laugh at the person who is hauling ass in front of me only to hit the same red light as i put put up right next to them in the next lane. i should wave hi.
Guys, come on. He wasn't stopped for being black. He was stopped for going over 100 mph!! I don't really think it's fair to play the race card in this situation...not when someone is actually breaking the law (AND endangering others).
Anyway, my car (95 Aspire) starts shaking as you get to 65. Shaking and making weird engine noises. I have to turn off the A/C just to merge into traffic! I call it my Hamstermobile.
Porsches are meant to go fast. He was on a highway right? Not a school crosswalk. BFD
Hahahahhaaa. "...janky ass Mitsubishi Mirage".
That is the funniest thing I have seen, heard or read all day.
Hilarious!
moooooooooole...
moley moley, moley, moooooooooole
Atlanta ain't no joke, worse drivers ever
I say this as a New Yorker...
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¿¡Por qué no te callas!?
Damn boy, 109 in a 65? For somebody going that fast they better have someone in labor in the car.
-.-
The internet, where the men are real men,
the women are real men, and the children are the FBI.
Womp womp.
Hee hee.
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The pair of moobs that makes a cameo at the 0:45 second was an interesting surprise - MK
Awww I love MK stories...there should be story time w/ MK everyday right after lunch but before nappy time.
"I decided to see how fast my janky ass Mitsubishi Mirage would go on the freeway"
Too funny.
HA! I used to drive a Mitsubishi Mirage! Janky is RIGHT. That thing was a piece of shit. I got into one little fender bender and it crumpled up like a coke can.
MK, I'm glad your little adventure ended well cuz if you'd have had an accident, you surely would have perished in that death trap and you wouldn't be here now to bring such joy to our lives.
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I should be thrown into the loony bin for posting this shit. And we can share a padded room, because you're reading it! -MK
I can't get past that giant wart near his nose.
Sorry Courtney, but this was on the south side of town and in Atlanta that is where those of color live (yeah, we are still segregated). And this is nothing! People in Atlanta drive at LEAST 20 miles over the speed limit or they get run over. Hell, I have hit 90 going home at 5:00 before, and I was still passed by others!!! Arresting him was a bit much, though. I think there was a STOOPID cop (yeah, that pretty much describes most cops in Atlanta) who wanted to brag about arresting a rap star.
120 MPH in my old Eagle Talon on I-87....cute try andre, *pinches 109 speeding ticket on cheeks*
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"You know, and we know, and you know that we know that it's nonsense"-Daniel Hannan
six months after i got my license, it got taken from me. it was then i realized i drive like a mad person.honestly who drives 65 on a highway!
My first car was a Mustang and that was probably why I racked up the speeding tickets.
Fuck the dumb shit. Sports cars are meant for putting the pedal to the medal!!!
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://www.myspace.com/triston
My first car was a Mirage too! The steering wheel would start to shake after about 65mph and it would always break down in front of the hottest guy in high school. So embarassing!
I bet he was booked for DWB (driving while black.)
Reminds me of when a tinted out Porche caught up to me on the E-way and did these little circles around me, checking my shit out. So I dropped that bitch into 3rd gear and we played E-way tag at 115 mph. It was in the middle of the night of course so no one was around.
109 in a porsche!? i had my insight up to 110....
He is cute..I would def hit that.
xoxoxoxox
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.
yeah Courtney Love, because there is nothing wrong or dangerous about driving 40 miles over the speed limit.
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All the money in the world won't buy you peace of mind
You can have it all but you still won't be satisfied
-Annie Lennox "Money Can't Buy It"
Oh such bullshit. He was arrested for being brown in the wrong part of town.
"now you all have numbers, so we're going to do this alphabetically"
I can't stop laughing at "When I got to around 95mph, this little ass bitch was heaving and about to collapse. I thought the doors were going to come flying off and the tires were going to collapse......The motor would've straight up, opened the hood up and jumped out!"
Who is this person and why should we care?
WHAT ELSE ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DO IN A PORSCHE?!? PLEASE. He was just doing what ANY and EVERY rightful Porsche owner should putting the pedal to metal, hugging to ground and DRIVING his car. Unlike all these assholes I see driving 45 on the highway in some insane 911 Twin Turbo. Shit makes me sick. If you have a Porsche and no speeding tickets then you are an embarrassment to us Porsche lovers. Sure 109mph is fast but not in a Porsche, homey was probably only in 4th gear....SICK.
Glad no one was injured and I know this is not 'safe' but those fuckin cars are meant to be driven like that.
'Suzy Screw had a partner named Sasha Thumper I remember her number like the summer.'- Outkast
He looks so damn sad.
he was just shaking it like a Polaroid picture.
i love speeding, but i do it only on the freeway. When i'm late for work.. that would be everyday.
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www.poe200th.com
Happy Birthday, in your kingdom by the sea..
When I drove, I used to get so many speeding tickets with my big ass lead feet! If I ever become famous, they are gonna pull out those old booking photos and I am just gonna die right there!
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://www.myspace.com/triston
I always thought OutKast would be the biggest hip-hop group ever, but it seems like they don't get along enough to keep putting out good music together.
An accident waiting to happen my ass! They busted his ass for driving negro! And negro driving a porsche at that!!!
That mole is whispering...
xo
Rants, Thoughts & Merde
http://rantsthoughtsmerde.blogspot.com/2009/03/jr-meyers-feast-for-king....
Submitted by EvilShoe on Tue, 03/31/2009 - 9:03am.
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OMG. That reminds me of a Carol Burnett sketch from back in the day!
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Wow, he's a superhuman moron...
I'm scared that I found that so quick. Call me Google Queen.
http://www.flowgo.com/funny/2180_heya-grandma.html
Later hookers
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Dick happens! - MK
Submitted by ISprainedMyUvula on Tue, 03/31/2009 - 8:49am.
Have you seen the video with Hey Ya with the dancing Granny with the swinging tittays? Oh my fucking gawd! I can't remember the site right now....but there are a few cartoons with her in it.
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Dick happens! - MK
The fact that this fuckery didn't happen in Florida is a sign that something wicked is about to go down. Trust this.
Meh, I'm off to go start my hectic, fucked up day. Later whores! *smooches*
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Dick happens! - MK
Weird. I was listening to his album on the way to work today!
Stupid ass bitch, crazy bitch, ol' dumbass bitch, crazy bitch....
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CROCS are made in the devil's workshop. Yes, they are!
I like OutKast.
If this is the worst he can do, good on him.
Please.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
If you guys want to hear a great cover of Hey Ya, give this a shot. It loses something in the translation toward the end but it's beautifully done otherwise.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8-8nkkOA_AM
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Wow, he's a superhuman moron...
I decided to see how fast my janky ass Mitsubishi Mirage would go on the freeway.
HAHAHAHAHA! Was it a red Mirage, MK? Black pleather interior?
Whatever happened to outkast?
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Fucka Doodle Doo!
Disappointing mug shot. He's not smiling with his eyes.
Hey Ya .. slow the fuck down.
Err...his mole is kinda distracting. Too bad it didn't have the balls to talk it's way out of the situation with the police.
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Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that who cares? He's a mile away and you've got his shoes.
-anonymous
Don't you usually just get a ticket for speeding?
I hope I can be a cinderella of someone. My friend recommend me a millionaire dating site
**** AffluentMeet.com ***
where I can meet millionaires. It's really a hot place and just for millionaires or admires.
I'm kind of disappointed that he's not rocking some hillbilly Forrest Gump getup.
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Wow, he's a superhuman moron...