The Empress of Lucite Displays Her Magical Powers In Miami
If you were in Miami over the holiday weekend, you might have noticed extra-sparkly particles of glitter floating in the air. No, it wasn't only cocaine. It was also the lucite dust that floats off of Shauna Sand whenever she glides above the sand.
The Empress of Lucite and her purse handler (who looks like he can't believe it's not butter) spent their Memorial Day beautifying the beaches of Miami. Bette Midler would be so proud. Note to all cities: If you want your beach to make the world's most beautiful list, invite Shauna Sand. When Shauna's exquisite lucite heel starts floating above the sand, every piece of garbage will throw itself into a trash can (humans included) and seaweed will slither back into the ocean.
And every scientist on the planet should immediately travel to Miami and gather up the sand the Empress of Lucite's heel touched, because it definitely holds major healing properties now. One snort of Shauna-blessed sand will suddenly make the un-elegant....ELEGANT!
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Submitted by Who Datt on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 5:07pm.
We can comfort ourselves with the very real possibility that her children will shun the spotlight, excel in their education, choose great careers, marry decent men and become productive citizens. In other words, the opposite of dear old mom.
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here fucking here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We can talk all the shit we want about her but girl still has the most ROCKIN' body around!
That model she paid to strut around with her is gorgeous. Who is he?
It's not in...
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Homegirl needs to get another hobby besides sunbathing. Slut is darker than Obama.
Submitted by iHeartHaters on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 8:03pm.
OMFG *laughing at angel's avvie until I pass the fuck out*
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O this old thing!? This is just something I threw on! (I wanna go back to Pammy soon - she makes her own jokes;p but, actually, so does this guy really...ha!)
♥ ThreadKilla!
TwitterWhore
TwitterWhore2
OMFG *laughing at angel's avvie until I pass the fuck out* Once again, the queen of avatars rules LOL!!!!
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
she looks a lot better than Jodie Marsh
I hate this bitch! I wish the Paps would stop giving her so much attention for NOTHING, she has done nothing to deserve any attention!
I think it's awesome how the passersby are all like: O - who's THAT?! It's someone famous, yo! I gotta see that famous person!
And it's all becuz they have flies (paparazzi, literally) buzzing around them. It's like the seventh sign or some shit.
♥ ThreadKilla!
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Those boobs look like they are filled with lucite.
Oh my gosh - my Shauna has just made Miami THE Capital of the Vacation Universe! Just by stepping off a plane and putting one of her Coco-Chanel-designed-lucite-shod tootsies on the ground in Miami, she has instantly transformed it into Elegant City! What a beauty! My god, do Miami-ians realise how lucky they are to have the Goddess of Goodness deign to stay at their little beach?
That dude she's with has gotta go, however. Oh, Shauns, he looks like he was fried in a can of Crisco - and not drained! Ditch him, honey, and find a decent white dude, puh-leeze!
MK, sweety, you done hit the nail on the head - I laffed till I sneezed at this latest bon mot of yours:
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When Shauna's exquisite lucite heel starts floating above the sand, every piece of garbage will throw itself into a trash can (humans included)
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How accurate.
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"Oh, really? Did she like it?"
"I just love being a whore - you meet the most fascinating paint salesmen and curtain-rod manufacturers!"
Submitted by But.Seriously.Folks on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 1:45pm.
You are so right! Somehow I think those kid's are better off, the less time they spend with their mother. Sad.
Mark of the douchebag, he's carrying HER bag. I'm sorry, but I'd spend top dollar of a video of Shauna beefing in those shoes. I'd watch the slo-mo of the wipeout, over and over.
"JUST SMILE LIKE A NORMAL FUCKED UP PERSON."
Charles Manson
The EoL can balance herself on lucite in sand, she's a MFin hero to whores everywhere!
(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)
2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
We can comfort ourselves with the very real possibility that her children will shun the spotlight, excel in their education, choose great careers, marry decent men and become productive citizens. In other words, the opposite of dear old mom.
looks like she got another boob job.
both bodies are pretty impressive, i gotta admit. (except the horrid boob job)
faces, not so much.
how the hell does she walk on those lucite platforms on the SAND and not break an ankle? i have trouble walking on sand in my bare feet, LOL.
"...who looks like he can't believe it's not butter"
LMAOOOOOOOOOOO!
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Douchechill!
How much is she paying him? She wears those gawd awful shoes to the beach? Dingbat.
All she has is her body. Nothing's sadder than an aging "beauty".
I wonder if she thanks Lorenzo for her fake tittays, boy toys and trips to wherever on the alimony and child support he pays her? What a wreck.
Submitted by christine the hoff on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 12:48pm.
I think it's a fucking shame, if she gained ten pounds and lost the tittays she'd look so normal.
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I think looking normal would be her ultimate nightmare. She is only given attention for being a walking Barbie freakshow.
“I ejaculate boiling venom, so I’d need to wear like fifty condoms.”
No clue who this fucker is.
Also, I already know how, but I'd still like to ask:
How can she be so skeletal?
Lipo everywhere, starvation or both?
i kinda wanted to see what her tits looked like too...i bet she's got some fucked up ronis
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...so i drank one/it became four/and when i fell on the floor/i drank more..
-morrissey
Is she using child support to pay rent boys to squire her about? I mean, seriously. Who wants that for real? Lorenzo Lamas, follow the money! Your kids are home eating microwave mac n cheese while this trick tries to make people think she's desirable. Sad!
Ok, enough pontificating, I need some liquor.
-LOVE ANDERSON
I agree she is actually pretty hot from the neck down except the inflated balloon chest. & ankle tat.
Duh, sluts!
Why do you think she's IN Miami?!
Titty upgrade!!!
That being said, her transformation to human Barbie is complete.
Because I know her Ken is peen-less.
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The line between sex and society is so fine and blurred... even Amy Winehouse wouldn't snort it.
http://www.myspace.com/triston
Her tits look even bigger then they used to on her malnourished body. I guess she got an upgrade, the more birthday candles the bigger the tits I guess.
GAH! MY EYES! Nice non-matching bikini. Stay klassy, Shauna.
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"I don't believe in love. I believe in fucking." --Brian Kinney
I SWEAR these cheap-ass looking Hollywood dames want the world to know they have fake tits. It's a status symbol. "Lookit me! I can afford fake tits! My alimony paid for 'em!"
I hate when people wear mismatched bikini tops and bottoms.
P.S. to all you people:
Pam Anderson is ten more kinds of nasty than this chick.
Appearance-wise, anyways. The reality is always much different.
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"You can get it doggy-style or you can get it laying on your side. Those are your only choices. This is my house and I get the say."
@parissucksliterally: No, I have not! I am going to have to seek them out. I am inexplicably really cravin' some wimmins today and she hit me just right, I guess.
@CRAZY: You too, eh? haha.
p.s. I love Pacino too, man. (random thought, just wanted to get it out there)
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"You can get it doggy-style or you can get it laying on your side. Those are your only choices. This is my house and I get the say."
Like the new tittays.That she's able to walk on sand in those heels is almost circus like.Her mug is sad...but her body game is good from that range up to 10lbs. from that.
she's so perfect...i wanna be like her when i grow up
http://r-e-ana.livejournal.com/
He's very sexy imo, hot damn, I would be all over that one in a heartbeat....and she's is so ridiculous it's beyond, how dont her heels sink in the sand? And what's with the mixed match bikinis? Not trendy, dumb.
The tupperware bowls are boobilicious. Good idea for her to hide her face and put her best assets in the front window.
Yes, her tits look not only nasty, but newly bigger. She should just have them merge in the middle to make a uni-boob and get a job as a buoy.
"Rhoda, we're all aware that you're an adroit liar"
She has surpassed Pam Anderson in looking like a skanky whore. What a joke.
I think it's a fucking shame, if she gained ten pounds and lost the tittays she'd look so normal.
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Fucka doodle-do.
I think it's a fucking shame, if she gained ten pounds and lost the tittays she'd look so normal.
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Fucka doodle-do.
Submitted by Cindyloo on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 12:40pm.
How can you walk on sand with those *TITS*???
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"Liberache, Versace, Coocarachi"
her boytoy looks young. is that the one who beat her up not so long ago?
Is it just me or did she get her boobs done again? They look bigger and firmer. Last time we saw this skank they were getting droopy and looked much smaller.
She has no idea what a pig she really is and how everyone laughs AT her, not with her. What a fucking role model for young girls. No wonder we have Girls Gone Wild and all the other "how can I out-slut the next tramp" girls out there. Jesus Christ I feel sorry for all you Dads with little girls to raise! Lotsa luck!
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"Money is the magic wand that turns many a frog into a prince" - ChubbyWubby
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Watch out Donatella! Someone's coming after your leathery crown!
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The last guy that told me to have patience, I burned him down and bagged his ashes.
her tits look bigger. i bet she had 'em topped off to triple Fs or Gs
i think his abs are spray-on
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How can you walk on sand with those shoes???
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"Crocs: They are to your eyes what second-hand smoke is to your lungs."
Submitted by Big Bertha on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 12:27pm.
how the fuck does she walk on the beach with those hideous shoes? I can barely walk in flipflops.
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i was just asking myself the same right this minute. isn't her last name SAND?? might have something to do with her ability to walk on sand. just sayin'.
Submitted by CRAZY on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 12:17pm.
UMMM...EWWWWW!
*********** Those aren't tits, they're beach balls!
Boobs like that have to hurt. Just gross.