Jon & Kate's Shitty Marriage Is Ratings Gold
9.8 million hos spent 1 hour of their lives watching Jon & Cunty Beaverhead Plus 8 last night. This was easily TLC's most watch episode ever. Jon & Kate even beat the Lost season finale in the ratings. That has to hurt. Sadly, I was not among the 9.8 million suckahs who watched, because I went to bed at like 8 o'clock after being up for 30 hours straight (don't ask). I wanted to make sure I was fully coherent when I watched, so that I could take precise notes on how to be a bigger and better cunt. Kate is the master at this and she deserves my undivided attention. I watched a bunch of old episodes this past weekend and it really is like a master class in how to be a mega bitch. The reviews from the critics confirm this.
UsWeekly compiled a few:
On Kate saying her life in the media spotlight is so hard: "Is it really, Kate? Tell that to a family in which the breadwinner has just lost her or his job, you silly, self-absorbed fool." - Baltimore SunOn Kate saying the paparazzi following them is creepy: "What's creepy is having your children followed around by a camera crew. Any camera crew. Period. It's exploitation, whatever cutesy name you want to give it." New Jersey's Star Ledger
On Kate saying she's alone 6 times when Jon goes away for the weekend: "You just wanted to say, 'We get it! You feel you're the Wronged Woman! Aren't you savvy enough by now to know you're not winning us over?' This was especially true when she noted that 'all of a sudden, your kids are calling you your babysitter's name.' I could almost hear millions of viewers shouting, 'So stay home!'" - Entertainment Weekly
Beautiful, right? Kate probably came a million times over after reading the reviews.
Just from watching a few clips online, it looks like an episode of Faces of Death. Seriously, it's like witnessing their marriage get hit by a train in slow motion. I mean, in the clip above, you can cut the awkwardness with one of Bai Ling's razor nipples. They should be speaking to a therapist not a fucking producer.
My favorite part has to be when the producers asks them what the future holds. Kate says, "I'm here" and Jon says "I'm here....for the kids." I expected the rabid beaver on Kate's head to pounce on Jon's crotch and bite into it. Obviously, when Kate pulled his nuts out she missed some of the root, because it sounds like they are starting to grow back.
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oh, and by the way you know that now their will probably be a show with Octo-Mom!!! God Please...NOOOOOOOOO
Has anybody but me noticed that Kate demeans Jon ALOT? It's no wonder that if he had a liason I think most men would if they had to live with her. She keeps saying everything she does, she does for her kids. Give me a break, she does it for the notoriety. Her husband is fed up with it. He quit his job to take care of the kids so she could do her thing and it just gives me a bad vibe when I see her with that one bodyguard ALL the time! Even at home! Isn't it her husband who could protect her. I'm a woman but, they have tried to make her out to be some paragon of virtue! She likes the limelight whereas her husband just wishes it would all go away. I have no doubt that they love the kids but, it's costing their marrige and they don't have the respect of those kids to say, "We aren't doing the show anymore"! It seems to me the $$$ is more important than keeping the family together!!! I sympathize with the next man she gets involved with! She's lucky Jon stuck around with her as long as he did!!!
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Submitted by snideychick on Wed, 05/27/2009 - 5:18pm.
Snideychick sez:
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE producers of Jon & Kate + 8 get Dr. Phil on the show as their marriage counselor! I want to see a HUGE explosion of self-rightous crazy between Dr. Phil and Kate.
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That is a great idea! I would even watch that mess.
Snideychick sez:
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE producers of Jon & Kate + 8 get Dr. Phil on the show as their marriage counselor! I want to see a HUGE explosion of self-rightous crazy between Dr. Phil and Kate.
Scheming liars. They need to stop the cameras about 10 seconds ago and put this shit to bed. Gross. Those poor kids. They sit on the couch and bash each other and then keep yapping about "it's all for the kids!!" including the mansion, highlights, $400 dollar shoes and designer purses and first class air tickets when travelling without the kids. Scumbag heaven.
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That's exactly what I'm talking about! If they really gave a shit about the marriage or the kids, they wouldn't be doing another season. It's all about the "perks". First class air tickets - this coming from a chic who grew up in a supposed trailer park! Perfectly groomed hair, nails, tan? really? who has time for that while raising 8 children? The clothes - geez does she ever wear an outfit more than once?!!The coats, shoes, purses... the new furniture for the big ass unhappy house! Throw 2 dogs into the mix? she can't handle the 8 kids plus the husband who doesn't pull his weight but she took on two more dogs? She can't stand the dogs!! I can understand the attitude towards Jon but she's nasty to the workers around her house. Did anyone see the episode when they "went green"!? She talked to those men like they were garbage. Constantly rolling the eyes anytime they said something to her. She's a cold person. Jon's right ... this is a business and she'll milk it for every dollar.
soooooo, Jon didnt cheat.
cause this bitch would be saying it like a mantra if he did.
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Fuck 'Em If They Can't Take A Joke
a message from the Church of the SubGenius
Why does this bitch remind me of Casey Anthony?
UGH! Kate's martyr routine is getting SOOOOO old! "Well, I'm here for the kids and I'M doing everything for the kids" and BLAH BLAH BLAH! Gaw, I wanted to smack her in the smug mug! No, you are doing this because you want the MONEY and the FAME and nothing else. If you don't want the whole world to know about your crappy marriage, then GO AWAY!!!! And take that stoooopid haircut with you!
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Why in bronzer on the nutsack hell is she naked, but he's fully clothed? Take all them panties off, Zac!
I watched the last 15 min of the encore, and while I'm not a fan of it, and only really know about them from this site, what stood out to me was that it was all, I's and me's but not alot of we's or us from both of them.
I've been mistaken for a responsible adult
All the K8 hair avvies are killin me, too fuckin funny!
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2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.
"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"
"We moms know what it's like to juggle. Imagine juggling ALL THAT. You'd be a bit crazy too."
Hi all- lurker here, commenting for the first time.
LisaRose, I'm a mom too, so I know how crazy it gets and we all lose our patience. But I don't see how that excuses Kate's actions or her attitude. You can be a mother of 8 and still be kind to those around you. We're human so we cannot be that way ALL the time, but at least we can make an effort. Kate doesn't seem to do that, and the more she behaves the way, the more likely her children are going to grow up to be the same way. I cannot believe that some people try to excuse how she treats her family. Since when is this ok??
Yes being a parent is never easy, but that's no excuse and shouldn't be used as one. Be responsible for your behavior and stop blaming everything going on around you for it.
You know what...Kate may be a total cunt, but I'm getting tired of all the frigid bitch comments! You ladies out there should know better. I, for one, can totally relate to having to wear the pants in a relationship. You would be SHOCKED at how many men love this. Jon was toooootally attracted to Kate because of that factor. Jon absolutely knew what he was marrying into and loved it at the time.
THE THING IS, women get really frustrated when they have to do everything in the relationship. Jon was obviously a useless twat who seemed to not even realize that he has a million kids. Kate is a woman of rage, and I can get into that. She needs a man that can stand up to her.
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http://wethinkyoushould.blogspot.com/
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COME AT ME, BITCH!
Submitted by Sensimina on Wed, 05/27/2009 - 8:50am.
The saddest thing about all of this is that I'm starting to think Kate's hair looks good.
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You hush your face, girl! Them's fightin' words!
*wink*
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Imma have cake and Imma eat it, too... and I don' even like cake!
I have never, nor will I ever watch this travesty of a show. Even though this couple lives in the same county in PA in which I grew up (Berks County)
The only thing I know about them are the clips that Joel McHale shows on The Soup about how henpecked the husband is and what a ball busting fame whoring beyotch she is.
Kate's hair looks like a modified mullet. Business in the front, bedtime in the back.
Yeah, I said it. And I'm not taking it back.
I will admit that I watched this piece of crap show on Monday night. I won't watch it again and give Kate the satisfaction. I think she's a horrible mother for whoring out her children the way she has and I think she's a frigid bitch wife. Twenty years from now her children will all hate her for what she did to their childhoods and won't have anything to do with her. On the other hand, I think they will still have a relationship w/their father. Paybacks are a bitch Kate. Keep telling yourself that "everything I do is for my kids." Yeah right.
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The saddest thing about all of this is that I'm starting to think Kate's hair looks good.
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COME AT ME, BITCH!
I may be the only one but I don't hate Kate. I feel she became a woman in charge and she took the reins like a sargent. She DOES boss Jon around and he's sick of that but she's in CHARGE. She can't get past being in charge. Look at the car Jon drives... a two seater. Does that show that he has any care at all for his family? It shows he wants to be ALONE and he'll never be alone. They both need to get a grip of what their life is and make the best of it. Way back before anyone talked about this show I always felt Jon liked that Kate was in charge. I pictured hot steamy times for them after the camera stopped. I think the show got to be too much for him and that is all. Look who the kids gravitate toward. It's Jon they asked to come back. We moms know what it's like to juggle. Imagine juggling ALL THAT. You'd be a bit crazy too. Don't hate on Kate so much.
Just wondering....... Does anybody like that cunty self righteous bitch?
Jon needs to get out now and take the kids with him.
Oh, her crocodile tears. She clearly has a narcissistic actress's personality but she's a bad actress. Only people who have no experience with such characters couldn't tell that her sadness over her marital meltdown was fake
edited double post..
since i fucked up and hit the post button twice, i will say that I am going to the dr today to see if I have a "slow leak" and if so, if theyll take the baby tonight or tomorrow.
will keep y'all posted!
~ <3 ~~ <3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~
4D pic of my son taken 5/22/09 @ 38w4d
If youre reading this, I havent given birth yet....dammit all!!
@ tojo- THATS EXACTLY WHAT I SAW WHEN I LOOKED UP!!! OMG- and KH8 even stole the 4:20 mark too.. WHADDA BIOTCH!
~ <3 ~~ <3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~
4D pic of my son taken 5/22/09 @ 38w4d
If youre reading this, I havent given birth yet....dammit all!!
"I wanted to make sure I was fully coherent when I watched, so that I could take precise notes on how to be a bigger and better cunt."
It's sentences like that one that make me love you.
Anyhoo, that bitch is just crying for all the attention she won't be getting... now that Jon is finally walking out on her narcissistic controlling cunty ass. She hates him with a passion, but he WAS a captive audience to her crap.
Part of me hopes they stay together... 'cos I quite enjoy the way Jon needles Kate with his passive aggressive bitchfuckery. It's subtle and I admire that.
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Know why they don't play Rock / Paper / Scissors / Pussy? Because NOTHING beats pussy! -- Toom Viltrax
you can so tell he doesn't want to be there.
she is eating this up
I like when she says she appreciates the fans now.
How about the truth.
I wanted to tell all the fans Ive barked at, scowled at and basically offended...Im sorry.
Fuck you.
And not one apology for the Hair?
Her nannies hate her and want her dead. I could see it in their faces. Expecially when she expected the one to go get her coat and they sent her ass to the van to get it herself.
Again, Fuck you.
I think her PR rep was standin there with cue cards. She is an unmitigated, delusional woman. You could see Jon was he was hurting when he kissed one of his babies...at the Park. Speaking of which...why have the party at a public place so easily accessible. Why not just send the Paps and Invitation. The way she knocked the kid out of the way to spray the silly string and get camera time...and demanded the bag to sprinkle the candy all over the camera shield again...and god forbid...smack her gum wrapper against it said it ALL.
Now that she has chased away Jon, she can start ousting the kids one by one...and then..her dream will come true.
Kate minus 8
Hells bells, LORETTA!
how happy they are!
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kate cut jons balls and wears them as earrings
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"And I went through this whole thing; am I gay?! Am I straight?! And I realized: I'm just slutty." ~Margaret Cho
"This is supposed to be about delicious booze!" ~MK
Submitted by MeowMeow on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 11:16pm.
Are you fucking kidding me? This contrived piece of shit (which i watched) had more viewers than Lost's last finale???? Fuck me running.
Lost rocks. Marry me Ben Linus.
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LOLOL
Sure, he's all yours. *walks away arm in arm with Richard*
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The Gosselin Hair Video is here! (A My2cents/Sandbitch/TITS production)
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXQe-HLgHBs
look at the 4:40 mark - she totally disses jon, too. completely ignores him and it looks like he wanted to say something to her and she just walks away.
anyone else think she was acting SO FAKE during the party - laughing and acting like she's such a nice, happy person. i wanted to throw something at the tv every time she cackled. it was so apparent she wanted to come across as the good guy.
I like the way the guy from The Soup calls the show, "Jon Minus Nine"....it's over Johnny!
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Shhhhh! I'm not really here.
I know nothing about these people, but leave it to MK to make me laugh my ass off. I LOVE YOU MK! xoxx
Submitted by 2much4u2handle on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 10:58pm.
Yeah I watched some of the episodes yesterday frankly Jon been telling her since last season he wanted out of the show. If she truly wanted to salvage whats left of her marriage she should've told the producers no. She more caught up in her image now and she knows damn well she loves the cameras and attention...not in for the kids but for her 15 minutes of fame. WTFB
When you put fame and fortune before your family and loves one you end up alone.
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I honestly think if her only option was to do a porn, she'd go for it!!
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This episode of As The Babywhores Turn was brought to you by Pampers Pull-Ups, y'all.
If anyone deserves the backlash they get it's these two grifters. The sad part is those children. I think Joan Crawford will come off a saint compared to Kate Gosselin.
Are you fucking kidding me? This contrived piece of shit (which i watched) had more viewers than Lost's last finale???? Fuck me running.
Lost rocks. Marry me Ben Linus.
Yeah I watched some of the episodes yesterday frankly Jon been telling her since last season he wanted out of the show. If she truly wanted to salvage whats left of her marriage she should've told the producers no. She more caught up in her image now and she knows damn well she loves the cameras and attention...not in for the kids but for her 15 minutes of fame. WTFB
When you put fame and fortune before your family and loves one you end up alone.
What?
I would turn that Jon dude inside-out. Yeah, it's a weird fetishy-thing, wusses.
When he gives Kate the side-eye, it drives me wild with desire. So yeah.
SO.
P.S. Kate is a kunt.
Instead of "Jon and Kate" let's call them "Kon". Some other people or other do it, and I wanna be with the cool kids.
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"You can get it doggy-style or you can get it laying on your side. Those are your only choices. This is my house and I get the say."
If they truly cared about their kids they would not let a camera crew follow them around 24/7 in their home. Maybe just once showing what it is like, a one day special kind of thing, but not every damn day. They caused this drama themselves (if it is even real).
Submitted by chefcammi on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 9:16pm.
Kathy Lee and Hooda were discussing them today and I was on the phone with my mom so I had the volume down- I looked up to see a quick snip of KH8 slicing a piece of cake, turning around- where one of her daughters was waiting behind her with her hands out as in to take the plate- and KH8 completely ignores her and almost sprints away towards the back...
If I were the daughter I wouldve looked @ the camera and mouthed "what the fuck" real slow like.. HA!
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qXQe-HLgHBs
wow she really burns her daughter @4:20 hmmm...
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Oooo.. sick burn Kate.. sick burn!
i hate both of them.
Kathy Lee and Hooda were discussing them today and I was on the phone with my mom so I had the volume down- I looked up to see a quick snip of KH8 slicing a piece of cake, turning around- where one of her daughters was waiting behind her with her hands out as in to take the plate- and KH8 completely ignores her and almost sprints away towards the back...
If I were the daughter I wouldve looked @ the camera and mouthed "what the fuck" real slow like.. HA!
~ <3 ~~ <3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~
4D pic of my son taken 5/22/09 @ 38w4d
If youre reading this, I havent given birth yet....dammit all!!
Submitted by iHeartHaters on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 8:01pm.
Boy I bet Jon really wishes he had learned to tell the bitch NO a long time ago.
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I agree...also if he took a stand now, they'd just end up killing each other (hmmm, now there's an idea!) Kate does not seem the type to let ANYONE have the last word...except Kate...
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I've never watched the show, but of the few clips I've seen online, it's pretty clear that she's a shrew, but he's done nothing to dissuade me of the notion that he's a passive-aggressive cunt.
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I wish it was like the 70's and it was still ok to kick someone's ass. Damn
Jebus that was the most boring 6 minutes of my life. Why did I watch that crap? I don't even care about these people or even really know WhoTF they are.
Submitted by ricki lake on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 6:12pm.
... in related news, ricki lake just exploded.
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The Gossie Video is here!
http://www.dailymotion.com/user/fluffybunnykins666/video/x9dzac_jon-kate...
Pics: http://www.flickr.com/photos/36561337@N05/
Submitted by HotSlutOfTheDecade on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 8:00pm.
ITA. And let the world be educated that it's not a good idea to attempt to smuggle drugs in foreign countries! LOL.
yeah that Jon guy is so outta there. He may as well have sent a hologram to that back yard bbq - same effect. I bet Kate is surprised that he grew some cajones and told her to fuck the hell off.