Tuesday, May 26th 2009
An Act Of Indecency
A hurricane of fugness attacked Palm Springs this weekend when Tori Spelling decided to venture out in public in a bikini. Ring the fuck alarm! Seriously, does Tori hate humanity that much?! Okay, okay, I'll try and be nice for once in my life. Tori does have a face that only an entomologist could love. And titty balls that only a shot putter would touch. See, I can be nice sometimes!
In related news, thousands of eyeballs were seen hitchhiking along Highway 111.
If you really love feeling dry heavey, take a look at more pictures of Tori. And one of these pictures is not of Tori, her baby or her creepy husband. You are a genius with laser-sharp eyesight if you can correctly guess which one.
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We were watching a "CSI" rerun the other night and there was an actress with a strange face. I finally figured out what bothered me about her face: her face was too small for her head. Her facial features only took up a very small area of her facial area, if that makes sense. There was all this disturbing empty space surrounding her eyes, nose, and mouth.
Tori's face is too large for her head. All of her features look somehow outsized in proportion to her head. Her face looks CROWDED. This weight loss hasn't helped that effect.
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Really don't mind if you sit this one out
My words but a whisper, your deafness a shout
--Jethro Tull
WTF is wrong w/this whore?
Fat,skinny,pregnant,really skinny shes ugly no matter what,nothing new here,BTW I fell asleep during tori and dean last night fucking boring!
Submitted by starsign on Wed, 05/27/2009 - 3:16am.
Her Dad was a brilliant man but he was uglier than a hat full of hairy assholes.
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That made me giggle! haha...
Honestly, this girl cannot have a mirror! Those implants are in desperate need of replacing. How can you be so vain about your boobs to get implants, but then think they are fine when they look like that?? Then again in the grand scheme of things, boobs should be the least of her worries when we bring her anorexia & sleazoid husband into the picture. How long can she maintain that level of skinniness before her heart quits her?
No one wants to see those deformed cans. Maybe her pervert husband gets off on them. Gross.
her boobs remind me of that game we used to play where you put a ball in a stocking and whacked it on the wall....you know, you're supposed to revamp your boob job every 5 years or so, hers look all hardened and petrified
What fresh hell is this?
She should get her boobs fixed. But I totally want that bikini. No joke. What brand and style is that?
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www.youtube.com/watch?v=v0LBynlA4rM
www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Mh1TFbYoCI
The world's worst boob job. Ever.
I don't see how the husband says he misses having sex with her while she was preggo. I don't see how he can have sex with her at all!. If I had a penis, it would not rise at that unfortunate pair of what she deems as tits.
He most likely bags her with long paper bags over her head and her buxom. She's a double bagger for sure.
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Third test today, Mama Bear. Your eggo is preggo, no doubt about it. --- Rainn Wilson in Juno
Expecting my third in October.
So sad, when they have to get that skinny. Those little matchstick arms just make me want to cry.
I love how you snuck in the pic of the other lady!
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I’m just saying it’s a perception that can be perceived from it.
That is just nasty. Hopefully her kids don't inherit the ugly Spelling genes.
Gross. Really really gross.
Didnt she get her tits done years ago and wouldnt you think that with the Spelling money she could have got the best there is ??
Anyway-theres no excuse for bad tit jobs any more-she needs to get them redone..
I wanna like her but Im afraid Im on her mothers side who seems kind of cool and has a sense of humour and also if shes had any work done looks natural..
Hey,I was in Palm Springs this weekend-thank god I didnt see her because I was stuffing my face with delicious Mexican food all weekend and I wouldnt have wanted to throw that up-what a waste!
"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"
I've been watching all the seasons of 90210 (the real one) on DVD lately and I've been trying to tell myself "Hey, Tori looks cute there, even pretty!". But eventually, the angle changes, and reality comes crashing down. I really like Tori for some reason even though she seems like a spoiled cunt in her autobiography "Like OMG! My parents covered my yard in LA with snow for Christmas! It was so embarrassing! OMG, when my daddy would throw me a 300,000 birthday party, I just wished it could be at McDonald's"...but I think she's endearing because she has a lot of rage from being born rich but not so pretty.
But homegirl needs to get those things fixed....Jesus, I'd be trying to pop them myself if that was me...I'm pretty sure they can fix itm (sort of) by removing some skin and giving her implants in like a B cup or something.
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COME AT ME, BITCH!
thanks a lot! I was eating my lunch... now I'm not hungry...
Her fake boobs look horrible!
Why do these celebrities do this to themselves?
It is not attractive at all.
Gooood morning, Sluts!
She looks better without all that warpaint she usually slaps on. But the Frankenboobies are horrid.
You'd think a woman who has had dozens of surgeries would get that shit fixed.
She has the posture of Quasimodo and the face of a horse that is ready for the glue factory...
_____________________对您的和平_____________________
Plans change, Dreams never should...
ew she nasty!
Ya know I like Tori, I do, I really, really do. But by christ she is fugly. I feel so mean saying that as she really can't help being genetically fug. Her Dad was a brilliant man but he was uglier than a hat full of hairy assholes. And her Mum was fairly ugly as well. She really lost out in the gene pool lottery. And that hideously emaciated body with those god-awful bowling ball boobs! Poor, poor Tori, no amount of plastic surgey can improve on that fucking fugly mug.
And I CANNOT BELIEVE how cute her baby girl is! Thank the gods that she looks like her father! I honestly thought if Tori ever had a girl that it would be doomed to look like her. Luckily little Stella has a good looking daddy. That baby escaped looking like a chiuaua with huge googly bug eyes and pointy chubby cheeks, etc. Stella you are one lucky little bub!
I think that ugly caved-in chest and big ball-shaped implants killed her kid. Look at the poor child, he's at least in a coma. "So gros... losing consciousness..."
she is old...
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Submitted by Manimal5 on Wed, 05/27/2009 - 1:54am.
If her tits get any saggier Tori and her kid can play catch with them.
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Click Clacks.
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Just because no one understands you, doesn't mean you're an artist.
If her tits get any saggier Tori and her kid can play catch with them.
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Shhhhh! I'm not really here.
of course she eats a sandwich in front of the paparazzi. why do celebs always think everyone will believe they're not starving themselves if they eat a meal or two in front of a camera? stupid.
She seems like a nice enough person (annoying, but nice), but she is just ugly. I've tried looking at her from different angles and rationalizing why she looks like shit, but homegirl is just uglay!
Another role that Tori couldn't have pulled off. (p.s. blame this on lelu who made me go off on a wild Princess Bride tangent)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XegOczOvfXY
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Just because no one understands you, doesn't mean you're an artist.
Does Tori have any elderly Jewish relatives left that could tell her to EAT SOMETHINK ALREADY!?
Um... I don't think she looks that bad? For Tori Spelling, especially.
Her boobs don't look particularly nice, no, but they look better in the bikini top than they do in most of her dresses. I think she has the same problem as Paula Abdul does--something that looks like a very mild bit of pectus excavatum, so that their fake boobs look a bit like they're collapsing in the middle.
Her husband looks like a beached whale.
Right about now her publicist is having a clause inserted in her contract where she must be shot from behind with her boobs thrown over her shoulders.
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Just because no one understands you, doesn't mean you're an artist.
I love how you threw in the picture of that hag in Brazil...you could hardly tell the difference.
Donna Martin needs to get to Dr Rey (or some other "Doctor")STAT..seriously..that is possibly the world worst freaking boob job EVER. period. For all time. In the Universe. In the galaxy. From the beginning of time.
Thank goodness the little kids look like her husband. Even Rumpie's icy frost encrusted self melted a little at the sight of the little ones.
Money clearly CAN buy you love, but not looks or decent looking boobies.
(Here in the Hinterland, the Ladies have 2 pairs each)
♪ Tori's tittays' are too heavy and she hunches over when she's sitting. She really needs to put 10--15 lbs back on to look better. She should also cover up more, those lumpy melons look horrific!!
Nothing's worse than an Eating Disorder and Plastic Surgery....Women are afraid of aging, but doing BOTH will age one faster than if one had a FLEX COMPASSATOR aimed at Skelletorville.
Women, age gracefully:
Love life.
Laugh a lot...in spite of the absurdities of said LIFE.
Have Orgasms.
Explore other cultures and get perspecive on life.
Appreciate God and all of the Blessings.
Eat good, wonderful food and drink wonderful, good wine...with someone who gives you orgasms....and who YOU give orgasms as well....
Don't Be Selfish(!!!!).
Love is the only way...if someone is Truly Happy and Truly IN LOVE....they don't look bad.
They will always look BEAUTIFUL.
worst. boobs. ever.
For a woman her age...not that I would know... she looks like a dried up 70 yr old with prune tits.
Granny Clampit!
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Shhhhh! I'm not really here.
Man, that is Fright Night at the beach. That is one fucked up looking chick. How can that be on TV and make millions... Wow... You can be uglier than sin and still want everyone to see you. That is really fucked up.
Submitted by dulcecali on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 11:31pm.
Great posture Tori! Sit up straight, be proud of those melons!
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melons? more like squash
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Great posture Tori! Sit up straight, be proud of those melons!
Her implants were done by Earl Scheib.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Damn.Just...DAMN!(not good) Clearly hubby did'nt get the memo either: BIG TATTS ARE FOR GYM RATS.
...not doughboys.
Holy grandma tits! Karma is kicking Whori-Tori's ass isn't she?
"When I'm good I'm very good but when I'm bad I'm better." ~Mae West
Submitted by Sluttsville on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 11:08pm.
Hahahaha....there are car stories and then there are El Camino stories.
Yup, well said. I'll email in the morning after some bracing black Joe. And some coffee.
My strong craving for cantaloupe has subsided.
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If I don't do something, I'm going to end up going on the DL site every night for the rest of my life like the rest of those sad old fuckers, drinking myself to death and wondering what the hell happened.
Submitted by Sheeps on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 11:05pm.
No, it's not that good. It's more David Lynch-ish. There's a small possibility some illegal pharmaceuticals might have been involved.
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Hahahaha....there are car stories and then there are El Camino stories.
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If I don't do something, I'm going to end up going on the DL site every night for the rest of my life like the rest of those sad old fuckers, drinking myself to death and wondering what the hell happened
Submitted by Sluttsville on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 11:02pm.
Wait...does it involve me "borrowing" my step-father's El Camino, getting booted from an American Legion, and then getting caught skinny-dipping with 4 girls at a state park?
No, it's not that good. It's more David Lynch-ish. There's a small possibility some illegal pharmaceuticals might have been involved.
Submitted by parissucksliterally on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 11:02pm.
Hey Slutty, you're around more, and I love it! (Of course I am not here as much, but I like when I see you)
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Oh you! ♥♥
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If I don't do something, I'm going to end up going on the DL site every night for the rest of my life like the rest of those sad old fuckers, drinking myself to death and wondering what the hell happened.
Submitted by Sheeps on Tue, 05/26/2009 - 10:56pm.
McSlitty, I have a great El Camino story from way back. I'll email it.
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Wait...does it involve me "borrowing" my step-father's El Camino, getting booted from an American Legion, and then getting caught skinny-dipping with 4 girls at a state park?
Please email me that story, there's never too many El Camino stories.
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If I don't do something, I'm going to end up going on the DL site every night for the rest of my life like the rest of those sad old fuckers, drinking myself to death and wondering what the hell happen
I fucking cringed when I saw that picture.
Hey Slutty, you're around more, and I love it! (Of course I am not here as much, but I like when I see you)
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Submitted by EvilShoe on Sun, 05/24/2009
Well, if she is perfectly still she can claim she is not sexually active.
Seems to me that Tory should eat a little more, and her hubby, a little less.