Alert The CDC! Wonky Is Single Again!
If you've got a penis, hide it in a bomb shelter or stick it in holy water, because Parasite Hilton is back on the prowl! Wonky's mutant vag will be howling for fresh dick tonight, because she is no longer infecting that d-bag who used to be on The Hills. Wonky's spokeswhore told People that the herpytale romance of our time is over!
"In response to the inquiry on whether Paris Hilton has split up with Doug Reinhardt, yes, this is true they are no longer together. They remain friends and ask that you please respect their privacy."
Your genitals should have trembled after reading that, because they are scared. Hold them and tell them it's going to be alright.
As for Doug, at least he'll always have a piece of Wonky with him. When he looks down at his wart-covered wang and the nest Wonky's crotch crustaceans built in his pube bush, he will be reminded of the beautiful moments they shared together.
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TMZ have a vid of poor Wonky all upset outside the the dumping place... *sniff*
http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=5772e14e-cf1c-4489-8cd4...
Submitted by cathylulu on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 7:58pm.
Without Dlisted.com I wouldn't have found out about
===Mymuslimlove.c om===.
THANKS DLISTED!
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Without Dlisted.com I wouldn't have found this fabulous ASSHAT
THANKS DLISTED!
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"this fucker doesn't even fit!!" ~Toonkinstein
And they say it wouldn't last.... What the hell did these two have to fight about and break up over. These fucktards were always on vacation.
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My sweet baby girl born 4-15-09
Submitted by Sugaroo on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:08pm.
..."SO it was so long, bye bye, asshat."
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Didja notice MY asshat???? *smiles*
"this fucker doesn't even fit!!" ~Toonkinstein
she is heinous.
and this behavior will not be cute when she hits 40.
Well, duh! The only kinda guy you can't take your hands off is the kinda guy that turns into a complete asshole the moment you do. O yeah - then there's the whole Paris Hilton thing, too.
♥ ThreadKilla!
TwitterWhore
TwitterWhore2
.....Doug "The Accessory" Reinhardt, will be buried in Wonky's backyard in the Pet Cemetary. Donations to the CDC will be appreciated in lieu of flowers.
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"this fucker doesn't even fit!!" ~Toonkinstein
Well...he really wasn't in her league...whatever that is.
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Spiedi Credo: How do we, as uninteresting people without any visible talents or distinguishing features, get people to pay us not to do anything?
Was Paris every really relevant? She's a celebutard, but I don't think she was ever "relevant."
Everything is a deebacle around her. The MY New BFF, she's basically doing nothing now but trashing Brittany because Nicki didn't like her.
Submitted by leica on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:51pm.
I want to know who left whom. They never tell you that.
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TMZ has footage of her leaving a club in tears. They talked to people inside and found out that one of Doug's ex-girlfriends was inside and he was "flirting" with her. Paris got upset and threw ice at him and they got into a huge fight in the middle of the club. Then she left in tears.
They showed a pic of his ex; he TOTALLY downgraded to Paris.
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"Ick. Nast."
"and ask that you please respect their privacy."
This was meant as a joke, right?
Boy, she's losing relevance fast. Time to go full lesbo, Paris.
-.-
The internet, where the men are real men,
the women are real men, and the children are the FBI.
herpytale romance! lulz
EWWW !!!!!! I bet he got so many diseases from her.
LOVE ANDERSON: truer words never written.
Wouldn't it be ironic if he was dating her to stay in the public eye? If he was using HER?
Parisite has evil machinations behind everything SHE does: it would be delicious if he did too...
He will never date again. Who the hell would date Wonky's left overs? The first this he needs todo is hit the free clinic. STAT!
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"Ick. Nast."
I remember those bruises she had from Nick Carter and I lamented the fact that he throws punches like a damn girl.
Nick Carter love letters to Wonky
http://www.celebitchy.com/2792/paris_and_nick_carters_precious_love_note...
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"Why would Brad leave such a beautiful woman to hold orphans for Angelina?" - Michael Douglas
Ugh, I was hoping they'd get married and permanently fade into oblivion.
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"I DON'T NEED ANYONE TELLIN' ME 'PLAY ON WORDS' I'M A MOTHERFUCKIN' LYRICAL WORDSMITH MOTHERFUCKIN' GENIUS"
Why can't this cunt just have a really bad accident already?
I want to know who left whom. They never tell you that.
She couldn't keep a man if she tried. I think they're the ones doing the breaking up and not her. Just a few weeks ago she was talking about getting married, having kids and getting along so well with his family, and now they're dunzo? Hmm....
PS - She also always says the exact same thing to the press about every relationship. I think she has a recording of herself that she just replays for whatever magazine is doing the asking.
I work for CDC. We've already sent a team to LA.
Submitted by NOT IMPRESSED on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:36pm.
He looks like a date rapist. They're both vile. She will die alone. She went from dating Greek shipping heirs to dating z-list TV nobodies. It's pretty pathetic, actually. Next, she'll be dating some douche from Real World/Road Rules challenge. TRUST.
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Nah, Real world crew has too much class for her(sarcasm folks).
She'll net be sucking Brett Michael's equally diseased penis, IF HE LETS HER.
I want to live only till I die, no more and no less - Eddie Izzard
I read that statement but my brain interprets it as "respect their privates".
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Viper in the bosom.
You can bet the z-list boytoys like this get a pay-off and as Madeline Kahn instructed in "Young Frankenstein": "You betta keep your mouth shut!"
Unfortunately for her the families with mega-money keep their boys away from this human plague.
Submitted by cabbagehead on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:30pm.
by the look of his bottom lip, seems as if she gave him the parting gift that keeps on giving early.
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BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA!
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If a kid tells you he is going to throw up......believe it.
M.E. Paris kept the sweater on EHs advice.
Submitted by babybunny on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:30pm.
well, pretty soon this nasty skank will have to move onto women...cause most men have hopefully wisened up and stay 10000000 miles from that peice of dog shit. She is so pathetic that I really don't think even the most desperate of the desperados would get with that disease infested cockaroach (my apologies to all the cockroachs of the world)...she is getting uglier and uglier by the day...karma is real and doing its work with this skank...but why oh why can't she just be a victim of natural disaster or something...just die Parasite...please!!
- Truer words were never spoken. Wonky'll come out with the newest sex tape, and will then do as all the brainless slut actresses do & claim "I'm bisexual". Fuck her; she's a disease, and a severe beatdown is the cure...
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"I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don't like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa." - Brit's Tits
Submitted by Snarkley on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:28pm.
I would like to "respect their privacy" to the point that I never have to see or hear from either of them ever again.
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I'm witcha here.
I want to live only till I die, no more and no less - Eddie Izzard
He looks like a date rapist. They're both vile. She will die alone. She went from dating Greek shipping heirs to dating z-list TV nobodies. It's pretty pathetic, actually. Next, she'll be dating some douche from Real World/Road Rules challenge. TRUST.
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Douchechill!
Submitted by elmo533 on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:18pm.
He will never date again. Who the hell would date Wonky's left overs? The CDC needs to swoop in and quarenteen this douche.
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Indeed.
He probably broke up with her because he got tired of the general public keeping three feet clear of any contact with him while he dated her. That and the Lysol they sprayed every time he came near made him realize there was a problem.
After swimming in that skank's love cannal (a putrifying experience undoubtedly), dude needs to call in a hazmat team to purify him, even if it leaves him infertile. Face it, fucking Paris killed his testicles. Gross bitch.
Mommy and Daddy must be so proud. Bwahahahahahaha!
I want to live only till I die, no more and no less - Eddie Izzard
Oh Michael K, so rudely funny!
by the look of his bottom lip, seems as if she gave him the parting gift that keeps on giving early.
well, pretty soon this nasty skank will have to move onto women...cause most men have hopefully wisened up and stay 10000000 miles from that peice of dog shit. She is so pathetic that I really don't think even the most desperate of the desperados would get with that disease infested cockaroach (my apologies to all the cockroachs of the world)...she is getting uglier and uglier by the day...karma is real and doing its work with this skank...but why oh why can't she just be a victim of natural disaster or something...just die Parasite...please!!
I would like to "respect their privacy" to the point that I never have to see or hear from either of them ever again.
BTW~ check out the "Cokey Eyes" on Doug.....yikes~!
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"Whatever Bi-otch"
She's gotten a little extra thin there...
Submitted by kanderso on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:19pm.
I want her to get back together with Nick Carter because his love letters to her were SOLID GOLD. Does anybody remember those?
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No! LINK PLEASE!
Submitted by Am on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 5:54pm.
I hope he's enjoying his parting gift from her.
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No kidding. The gift that never stops giving!
I want her to get back together with Nick Carter because his love letters to her were SOLID GOLD. Does anybody remember those?
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"Why would Brad leave such a beautiful woman to hold orphans for Angelina?" - Michael Douglas
How long until she has a fling with Starvos, moves on to the next victim and two weeks afters she makes the following statement:
"we are best friends, we've known each other forever, he is my soulmate".. and I laugh at it?
Die WHORE, DIEEEEEE
He Dicho! caso cerrado!!
Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:05pm.
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kinda like farting.... funny and disgusting all at the same time. ;D
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It sounds like I'll need to be drunk, stoned and suffering from a minor concussion to deal with this fuckery. MK - 11/24/2008
Poor Paris, alone in her advancing years...
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"let me tell you something about my family WE ARE AS TIK AS TIEVES"
"its 1492!! Come on people!!!" provolone
Oh~ the look on her face.
Just stunning.
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"Whatever Bi-otch"
If you want privacy, don't live your life in front of the paparazzi. These people are dumbasses.
Moormarse ~ I agree. It would be hilarious to JUST ONCE see some statement that said, "we have become mortal enemies and intend to sling the shit for as much publicity as possible".
Face it. This douchebag had no money in comparison to her and that wasn't gonna fly for long. No way he could ever keep her in the lifestyle to which she is accustomed. SO it was so long, bye bye, asshat.
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If a kid tells you he is going to throw up......believe it.
Submitted by M.E. on Wed, 06/10/2009 - 6:06pm.
lmao @ FAS babies.
LET FAS BABIES BE GREAT!!!!!!
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"I've met Janeane Garofalo and she's a cunt"-Artie Lange