The Question Everyone Has Been Asking (Not Really)
That picture of the twin messiahs! HA! If the "second coming of Jesus" job doesn't work out for them, they should really star in old timey silent-movies. They have the "SHOCK! WHA?! WHO? BAM!" face down. Mary Pickford wishes! Now on to business.
Ever since a chorus of angels carried the twin chosen ones down from heaven on a bed made from God's beard, we haven't seen much of them. I figured they were too busy finding the cure for cancer in their own saliva or writing the sequel to War & Peace. Life & Style says this isn't the case. According to some sources, Knox is bulimic and Vivi is allergic to peons. Basically.
The source said, "They’re both hypersensitive. Knox has trouble holding down his food. He spits up nearly every meal." As for Vivi, she has food and environmental allergies, "Right now, she’s on a lactose and gluten-free diet, and she’s still underweight. Because of their delicate state, Knox and Vivienne need to be kept away from anything they could possibly be allergic to. That’s a lot easier to do when they’re home and in a controlled environment.”
Yeah, some of this is hard to believe. Messiahs don't eat food. They just lick themselves for sustenance. You know, the whole "body of Christ" thing. However, I do believe that they are allergic to us "normal" people. It probably stings their holy eyes when they have to look at commoners who don't have glowing halos over their heads.
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Knox looks like Angie. Vivs looks like Brad and Shiloh. I think its odd that all the kids got Angie's giant fish lips.
Submitted by K2 on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 4:06pm.
Don't these children have their 1st birthday coming up? Well, that explains everything. Jolie is holding out for the mega bucks from People magazine (JMO)! Time to do the family photo spread showing us their growth spurt plus an interview on how they are thriving and are just the BIGGEST personalities!! lmao.
Ha ha. Sorry I missed this thread- bloody work interfering! Sorry to be mean to kids but those kids look like blue bus travelling window lickers. Vacant stares, drooling, the whole thing. Granted they were in shock to see their parents and they were stuffed the wrong way in baby carriers so we might all look a bit perplexed but damn. I've got two kids and they never looked this blank a day in their lives. You see , pumping anorexic fame whores full of drugs and planting the correct sex and number of babies in a half starved womb is NOT A GOOD THING. Being 'breast fed'- i.e. held on her hollow tits for that oh so private photo op then off to the nannies and a bottle of formula is NOT A GOOD THING. Lets face it the poor bastards were swimming in the shallow end of the gene pool anyway but the IVF was probably the last straw. Also laughing my head off at whoever said Knox looked like Mickey Rooney- he does, he really does. Viv does have a whiff of Mother Teresa about her but I think looks more like Charlie Brown.
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Morbidly obese, barren, jellus h8er, jen-hen at your service.
Well at least they have the nannys to take care of them while super mommy is out saving the world.
If they aren't already sick, they'll probably be all anemic and neurotic by the time they're in kindergarten. Super-Mom will probably raise her children on some wack-o, strictly raw food diet.
It's what all the "cool" moms are doing!
Yeah, these children have no hope in sight about growing up normal, mentally nor physically.
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"I can't help it the kid was too short to reach my dials!"
omg AMAZOMBIE WHORLIE cant stop LOLLING!!!!
Mother of the year, eh?
I can't wait for these nutjobs to be exposed to the gullible fucks who still see good in these weirdos.
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"I can't help it the kid was too short to reach my dials!"
um...The one on the left looks like Britbit's bebeh, really 'special.' Seriously, uncanny resemblance.
Nah she's just raising the bounty on their heads... She's holding off till there is enough interest to start a price war against tabs for the next twins photo shoot to be donated to "charity". Because god forbid they donate their own hard earned cash... better to sell out the kids for that kind of thing.
That's what happens when you have IVF babies they come out all gentically weird. Maybe if she hadn't been loading herself up on hormones to get preggers to please Brad, her kids wouldn't be all screwed up.
But then again we don't know what the fuck is going on with those kids, nor do I care. Can't stand the parents, don't care about them.
She could hide the kids for 10 years and I don't think I would have noticed.
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Maybe if mommy dearest wasn't off globe trekking making stupid ass popcorn flicks they wouldn't be sickly.
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"You can lead a whore to culture but you can't stop her from throwing a glass of vodka at it" DEB
Submitted by KPS on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 4:33pm
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LOL! The kicker is that when she tells the interviewer how all the kids pitch in to help feed, bathe, clothe, and play with them ... she's not really lying. It's called stretching the truth - the bottom line is that the older kids probably DO spend more time with the babies than the parents!! I'm sure they are taking care of them. Just not the way a 7,5,4,3 year old's should be!
And you're right ... one will be totally laid back like Pitt and the other is an uptight demanding infant like the mother!
Here's a thought to Skakelina and Brad Shitt:
Maybe if those kids had FULL TIME parents looking after them and a REAL home they wouldn't be sick.
K2 -
So true! And one will be "the mellow one" and the other will be "the demanding one" and all of the other fight to dress, watch, quiet, feed, play, burp, teach, and/or walk them, like good future mammas and poppas playing with dolls...
And their drool will be holy water, their poop spun from platinum and diamonds, and their first words were the meaning of life, easily oozing from them like Buddha buttah.
Who do I contact at People for my paycheck...it wrote itself.
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"You go down deeper, stay down longer, and come up dirtier than any man I've ever known"
Don't these children have their 1st birthday coming up? Well, that explains everything. Jolie is holding out for the mega bucks from People magazine (JMO)! Time to do the family photo spread showing us their growth spurt plus an interview on how they are thriving and are just the BIGGEST personalities!! lmao.
Pitt & Jolie might be obnoxious over rated assholes ... but I don't think SHE'S that dumb. She's a manipulative, calculating, PR queen ... nothing they do is without an ulterior motive!
Dammit, that's not a loon, that's just some wannabe loon.
Twosie is the looserest of the loons.
And that is just really sad.
"Going gray is like ejaculating. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock." MAH BOO!!!
WHORLIEZ NO KEELZ JUS NOMNOMZ DA ORFANZ AND BI TAKOZ TAIST LAIK CHICKHENDZ
AMAZOMBIE WHORLIE, you're killing me!
NOMNOMNOM
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She's flat and that's that!
WHORLIEZ STEALZ MENZ FROM HENDZ AN BIEZ ORFANZ AN BI FER TAKO TYMZ
LOL @ a bed made from God's beard.
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CLICK ME www.theanimalrescuesite.com
AMAZOMBIE WHORLIE= best name evar!
TOO-ZIE CMERE SO I CAN EATZ UR BRAINZ LUNIE
NOMNOMNOM
IZ EATED DA PITTZ BRAINZ AN KEAP PITTBALLZ IN MII MOUF AN ORFANZ IN DA CLOZETZ
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 3:27pm.
Damn, we're good! It's too bad words aren't water! We'd be awesome firemen! :)
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we probably get it from our "void of humanity"
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www.walkms.org
help me regain my life! as you burn calories.
Damn, we're good! It's too bad words aren't water! We'd be awesome firemen! :)
♥ Threadkilla!
Jason Jones: "So why is aged news better than...real news? "Well, I don't think this is AGED news." "Give me one thing in there that happened today." ~ Interviewing Rick Berke, ASM of the NY Times for The Daily Show.
Submitted by twosie on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 3:13pm.
Michael K,
Is your life so void of humanity that you need to insult infants?
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Is Angie's so void that she's willing to buy and manufacture them and then skip off to 14 hours of being sexy and unstoppable each day?
♥ Threadkilla!
Jason Jones: "So why is aged news better than...real news? "Well, I don't think this is AGED news." "Give me one thing in there that happened today." ~ Interviewing Rick Berke, ASM of the NY Times for The Daily Show.
Submitted by twosie on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 3:13pm.
Michael K,
Is your life so void of humanity that you need to insult infants? From just this photograph people will realize that Knox and Vivienne are perfect. I'm not shocked considering who their parents are.
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Read again, MK quoted a magazine.
None of these are his words. If you like, contact Life&Style, they would appreciate your comments.
Tickle Loris in action:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rLdQ3UhLoD4
Submitted by twosie on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 3:13pm.
Michael K,
Is your life so void of humanity that you need to insult infants? From just this photograph people will realize that Knox and Vivienne are perfect
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don't you know this is Dlisted? we don't know what humanity is!
and you must be the best Brangelooine EVAH. Shame to all of the other JJloonies.
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www.walkms.org
help me regain my life! as you burn calories.
Submitted by twosie on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 3:13pm.
You must be pretty void yourself to come here and read the site. The kids do look slow AND a bit touched. Sorry you don't like it, but that is the truth.
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Submitted by Miss Thang on Wed, 04/08/2009 - 10:17am.
I aint no psychiatrist, but I am bipolar ............
*cookoo alert*
*cookoo alert*
*cookoo alert*
*cookoo alert*
*cookoo alert*
*cookoo alert*
*cookoo alert*
Michael K,
Is your life so void of humanity that you need to insult infants? From just this photograph people will realize that Knox and Vivienne are perfect. I'm not shocked considering who their parents are.
Let me tell you... most of these IVF twin moms are f'in bitches. I went to a multiple mom group meeting, when I told them my girls are identical twins, their whole attitude changed! Turned up noses and dirty looks all around! Whatever bitches... not only can I make my own babies... I do it 2 at a time!
I wanna steal her babies.
She needs to be forcibly sterilized. There is no reason ANYBODY should EVER have that many damn kids. Especially if they're just gonna hand 'em off to nannies half the time anyway. I say if you breed, YOU take care of the little bastards or else don't have any.
Well that's what happends when your brother is the father of your twins.
:0
;)
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LOL @ MK's humorous take on the sitchee-ayshun. I thought St.Scrange has said a billion times she's gonna quit acting and "be a mom" and stuff. It sounds like they must be getting top notch care by HIRED help. She's off filming dumb movies, and it ain't like they NEED the money. If my newborns were having such struggles and special needs and I had more money than God, I wouldn't be feeling the need to have my mug on the big screen just to feed the worship of lunatics who think my shit don't stink.
Whatevs.
Dumb bitch, charity begins AT HOME. Take care of your fragile infants, asswipe.
wait, Wait, WAIT!!
Shouldn't we be CELEBRATING the fact that we have seen 2 LESS Jolie-Pitts in general!?!?!?
When they do drag them back out (since they're OBVIOUSLY being called out), then it will be countless covers on their health, appearance, custody, etc.
ENJOY THE SILENCE!!! It's the calm before the storm, man...
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"You go down deeper, stay down longer, and come up dirtier than any man I've ever known"
Submitted by aliciasm on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 12:45pm.
wait. why has no one said anything about angelina's left boobie? is it leaking?
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oh my. don't lactating moms "leak"?
I thought it was a shadow at first.
God I know he's a baby and shit, but Knox has the most blank stare I've ever seen in my entire life! Wow! That's creepier than when SPF went through his Chris Farley look-alike stage.
Oh, and Kate needs to "Protect her kids from Jon"?? Puhleeze! More like you need to keep your kids away from that obnoxious varmit on her head...
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Why in bronzer on the nutsack hell is she naked, but he's fully clothed? Take all them panties off, Zac!
All that's normal for premies. Cute kids. Pity about the parents.
Maybe they aren't hiding them...maybe they just don't know where they are in the midst of all those kids and nannies...Angie's all, "My gosh, WHERE R THE TWINS?!?!"
Heh...I do think the bebehs are cute, tho
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Why in bronzer on the nutsack hell is she naked, but he's fully clothed? Take all them panties off, Zac!
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 12:52pm.
Submitted by greenfinch on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 12:37pm
i coudl see that happening to me cause they say your hair doesnt fall out as fast when youre knocked up, so its like you dont lose any at all. so people think their hair gets thicker..well i have so muchhair to begin with. i can see it just going all wonky stupid thick curly hair...
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 12:49pm
i agree. theres just too many now. i knew one set of twins in grade school and one set in highschool..(different sets) and now they are everywhere.
i sometimes wonder what people are thinking messing with mother nature, i mean i have never been in the position of where i couldnt have children, but really its your body telling you that youre not supposed too. either that or people are just too impatient to wait..
besides i thoguth having twins was more of like a genetic mishap..not something you long for. and i thought it usually had to run at least on one side of the family to happen...wonder whos side it comes from hers or brads?
Submitted by greenfinch on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 12:37pm.
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 06/24/2009 - 12:20pm
oh for fucks sake please dont say things like that...my hair went all dry and frizzy a couple of months ago and i dont know why. are yout telling me im up the duff? lol;
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Yeah - it took me until about 6 or 7 months after birth to really get it back...so it wasn't TERRIBLE...now it's just the funny story...well, the one before I had to shave my head becuz of lice...
♥ Threadkilla!
Jason Jones: "So why is aged news better than...real news? "Well, I don't think this is AGED news." "Give me one thing in there that happened today." ~ Interviewing Rick Berke, ASM of the NY Times for The Daily Show.
Yaknow what? Ku-das to these trashy tabloid for finally asking the question!
Okay, I have not read anything prior to adding my two cents, so if this has been said before, my apologies, but yeah, it's about time people start asking these questions!
Submitted by gia: "I call total bullshit on these celebs who deny having IVF when they pop out fraternal twins like nothing...For it to happen naturally, its not THAT common."
I'm 38 and when I was growing up, of ALL the kids I went to school and camp and lessons with, I only knew TWO sets of twins.
Now I walk down the street and see at least two sets of twins daily. Toodled around in their giant double strollers by their 40 year old, perfectly fit moms in yoga gear. Or the nanny.
Well that's what you get when you do fertility treatment on an anorexic ex junkie : non-viable offspring.
I'm surprised her bony ass was even able to hold on to those eggs...
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"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity
wait. why has no one said anything about angelina's left boobie? is it leaking?
Who is now the biggest tabloid star?
Brangelina?
Jennifer Aniston?
Kate Gosselin?
I think it might be Kate!
I've been SAYING this. Where are the twins?
Angelina was rumored to be using heroin during her pregnancy.
And you KNOW Santa Angelina the Holy Madonna wasn't breastfeeding. Too much work/time being the sole source of nutrition for her babies. If they were breastfed, they would have fewer of these health issues.