Saturday, July 4th 2009

From "The Fucked Up" News Desk

File this under: Why are humans the dominant species on earth?!

If this story isn't a good reason to start drinking rubbing alcohol and vodka on a Saturday afternoon, then I don't know what is....

At a park in Cambridge, Maryland on Monday, a bitch named Candy Michelle Vignari, gave birth to a baby girl....in a Port-A-Potty. Get ready to launch "Awww...Hell Naw" from the tip of your tongue, because it gets much worse. After the baby was born, Candy put her inside the caca-filled toilet, went outside and asked a construction worker for a cigarette. And we have lift-off!

The construction workers knew something in the milk wasn't clean when they noticed Candy covered in blood and womb jelly. When one of the workers tried to go into the Port-A-Potty, Candy told them not to because there was a baby in there. The police were called.

One of the workers said, "Right as the cops had pulled up I had seen her go back into the port-a-potty real quick grabbed a towel at the time I didn't know what it was and then she comes over to the cops and the cops grabbed the baby."

Candy was arrested and charged with child abuse and reckless endangerment. The baby is currently in stable condition at a local hospital.

It's too bad that the baby didn't know what was about to go down, because she could've pulled out Candy's uterus as she was sliding out so this fuckery doesn't happen again! I mean, this was unnecessary! All Candy had to do was bring the baby out and scream, "BABEH 4 SALEZ." Both St. Angelina Jolie and Vadge would've magically appeared with their checkbooks in hand.

Source (Thanks Tanya)

Posted by: Michael K


blaaaake's picture

this is why ppl need to be sterilized. there are too many ppl in this world and not enough resources. some ppl just shouldn't be allowed to reproduce.

chefcammi's picture

wtf is the that shit below?

~ <3 ~~ <3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~

Is it wrong for a man like him to have sugar baby?? you know it is an absolutely extramarital relationship, but more and more services c ome out on Internet focusing on this kind of relationship..like ~~~~~sugarscupid. c o m.. what will the world be??

eva2009's picture

I know a more interesting site ^^^^^^sugarmommamatch. c o m^^^^^It is where single women

and men come together for the mutual online dating experience.and it is for free. I

lilke the site!

Snoogle's picture

Submitted by Sensimina on Sun, 07/05/2009 - 10:12am.

She can do whatever she wants with her baby as far as I'm concerned.

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You cant be serious?! Throwing it away like a piece of garbage is okay with you? Please tell me I took your statement completely wrong.

♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥~*~♥

I just watched the MK interview and I swear to the Goddess' of Lucite and Cutlets the minute he spoke unicorn kittens followed by rainbow glitter shot out my ass!!!

chefcammi's picture

having children, knowing what a newborn looks like after birth, looking at their little faces, holding their warm little bodies to my chest and having them curl up into a ball all snuggly it makes me sick to think she could just throw away a baby like that. I could give two shits about her, but the fact that she threw this helpless little newbron into a toilet just gets to me. Looking at my son sleeping in his swing and how he is this little person with his own personality... if he wasnt sleeping so soundly I'd pick him up and just hold him.

I am happy that the baby is not dead.

~ <3 ~~ <3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~

PrettyPoison's picture

This has to be the most awful way to enter the world. I hope that this child survives, and never knows what happened. Poor baby. It is so heartbreaking.

angel_i's picture

Submitted by chefcammi on Sun, 07/05/2009 - 10:08am.

ATTENTION: AVOIDENCE OF CLEANING
AND EXCESSIVE COFFEE INTAKE LEADS TO HORRIBLE SPELLING!!
*********************************

I was all hopped up like that the other day. I'm off coffee as a habit but I have one now and then..and I was sitting there on the 'puter and when I got up I was ALL BUZZED OUT...like, my body was humming and I totally couldn't think straight. I won't drink coffee again soon, that's fersure!

ONT: There's no plan that would have helped this woman. She just wasn't all there. None of it makes sense. She puts the baby in the crapper but then walks around all bloody. She tells people not to go in there....I mean damn! It almost sounds like she thought that was her house and the toilet was a crib. She hands the baby over as soon as the cops come - obviously, they're gonna know it was in the toilet...she wasn't hiding anything. She's just THAT fucked up. And yeah - she's probably on drugs.

That has driven me crazy in a couple of places. They let crazies out cuz they're not harmful to themselves or others but they're also TOTALLY not able to care for themselves. They hit the streets and scumbags LOVE people who are not in full capacity - these people are easy to use and trick. And so these people who are already crazy start using street drugs. They just get crazier by the second after that. It's sad.

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

Tristram's picture

It'll be a golden moment when 62-year-old chain-smoking Candy shows up for her daughter's HS graduation. Wait, those two things will never happen.

Sensimina's picture

She can do whatever she wants with her baby as far as I'm concerned. The funniest part about the story is how she needed a cigarette like two seconds after pushing it out.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
http://wethinkyoushould.blogspot.com/
http://bleedingthecorgan.blogspot.com
http://myspace.com/rainbowsrule

Frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.

chefcammi's picture

ATTENTION: AVOIDENCE OF CLEANING AND EXCESSIVE COFFEE INTAKE LEADS TO HORRIBLE SPELLING!!

~ <3 ~~ <3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~

chefcammi's picture

THe whole "pregnant in school is cool" thing started right around the time I was graduating.. only knew of 3 girls- my cuz who dropped out as soon as she turned 16- got preg at around 18, so that doesnt count- some cheerleader and this likkt "yo" girl.

thats about it.

around 93 is when the chicks started thinking it was cool to get pregnant, IMO.

I live in MD. It's crazy to about this, being a mother myself.

Was she on drugs NOT to care about the baby? THis is why abortion needs to remain legal...an d maybe even free in some circumstances.. I'd rather have my tax $$ going to a womans abortion than to pay for her to loaf around raising her kids. Of course, there would be tabs on how many she had.. 3 strickes ad YOURE OUT!
Also, a few sessions of sex/self esteem counsling would help too...still cheaper in the long run.

whatever. just avoiding finishing up my kitchen right now... may be babbling- fueled my too much coffee, of course!

~ <3 ~~ <3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~~<3 ~

angel_i's picture

Submitted by Datura on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 11:12pm.

Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 7:23pm.
Submitted by Datura on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 3:15pm.

Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
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LOL! I don't think this was meant for this post but it strikes me as appropriate on so many levels. LOL!
-------------------------------------------

Hehehe. I nicked it from the thread about David Carradine's auto-erotic asphixiation bungle. Michelleb's comment made me laugh like a lunatic....
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ME too! LOL! Still! It still makes me laugh!

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

intellectualgeek's picture

Majorly fucked up, that's what this is.

Wanna bet she tried to FLUSH it down but the baby just wouldn't "GO"???

(∩_∩)(∩_∩)??~~B l a c k W h i t e l o v i n g.c O m~~___?? This is the best place for looking for sexy ladies(younge&rich) dating relationship or marriage. Now,Join us totally free!(∩_∩)(∩_∩)

Myntee's picture

Why do bitches do this?

You can hand your baby over to any hospital or police station, say you don't want it and walk away with no repurcussions and baby is safe.

Its sad to think how many other babies she may have had that have met this fate. The baby obviously slipped out pretty easy for her to squirt it out in a toilet, so how many babies have already paved the way down her vaj for this one?

Noelegy's picture

Thanks, MizRo! Ian Anderson is on my very short list of celebrities I'd actually want to meet. The high I got from meeting Neil Gaiman lasted for years...

***************
Really don't mind if you sit this one out
My words but a whisper, your deafness a shout
--Jethro Tull

Datura's picture

Submitted by angel_i on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 7:23pm.
Submitted by Datura on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 3:15pm.

Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
*******************************************

LOL! I don't think this was meant for this post but it strikes me as appropriate on so many levels. LOL!
-------------------------------------------

Hehehe. I nicked it from the thread about David Carradine's auto-erotic asphixiation bungle. Michelleb's comment made me laugh like a lunatic at work.

Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb

Sad.

Tamzin's picture

kill the bitch slowly.

**************************************************************************
My sweet baby girl born 4-15-09

Sookie's picture

i hope that stupid fucking cuntrag burns in hell

________________________________________________
"This is straight up fuckery."
His Holiness MK, 9/03/08

Mrs.Kravitz's picture

Well, fuck me sideways and twice on Sunday. I assumed Candy Michelle Vignari was a teenager. She is 44 years old!

-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Um, um, Look to the cookie Elaine. Look to the cookie.

KyLeo's picture

Public stoning is too good for this woman. She should be arrested then thrown in the holding cell with horny hungry lesbians.

angel_i's picture

OMG speakit: ignore them foolios. LOL! - Surrsly, from my end, they're just funny. They MUST have SOMETHING they should be doing for real. If you ignore them, maybe they'll go do it. You know - spend some time being accountable for themselves.

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

Reeter's picture

This bitch makes me sick!

speakit's picture

Submitted by The Audrey on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 5:25pm.

Wow, good for you! I mean that. I hope you're serious, because I would feel like an idiot otherwise. :-p

_____________________________

It's not been so good for me yet, actually. But I am serious.

angel_i's picture

Submitted by Datura on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 3:15pm.

Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb
*******************************************

LOL! I don't think this was meant for this post but it strikes me as appropriate on so many levels. LOL!

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

speakit's picture

Submitted by QuickDraw on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 3:05pm.
I try to be patient with stupidity, but not with those who are proud of it.

__________________________________________

Truer words never typed.

angel_i's picture

Submitted by Thornhill on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 7:02pm.

@AI..When I become All Glorious Emperor of the known universe, there will be no such thing as unemployment and all babies will be cared for. It's time for a real change...
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As long as you have an All Glorious Empress at your side, I'm all for it. Cuz restoring the balance is what it's all about. Just a note you might wanna take with you on your campaign trail;)

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

Thornhill's picture

@AI..When I become All Glorious Emperor of the known universe, there will be no such thing as unemployment and all babies will be cared for. It's time for a real change...

_____________________对您的和平_____________________
Do leave it out, knock it on the head, have a word and wind yer neck in you minty bastard...

Mrs.Kravitz's picture

Angel
As the (dead) songwriter wrote:

If you can't feed your baby (yeah, yeah)
Then don't have a baby (yeah, yeah)
And don't think maybe (yeah, yeah)
If you can't feed your baby (yeah, yeah)
You'll be always tryin'
To stop that child from cryin'
Hustlin', stealin', lyin'
Now baby's slowly dyin'

-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Um, um, Look to the cookie Elaine. Look to the cookie.

angel_i's picture

@Mrs. K: Werd. The one true werd is Idiocracy. That's where were headed, no doubt.

Thorny and I can speculate all day and night but the truth is that the current system seems to be creating more problems than it's solving....ANYTHING would be a welcome change.

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

Mrs.Kravitz's picture

Idiocracy.

-☮'---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮---☮-
Um, um, Look to the cookie Elaine. Look to the cookie.

Thornhill's picture

@AI...Well for starters. Everyone in the nation would be subject to DNA identification. If you fuck up you will be found and held accountable for your actions. All part of the big plan. Bad things happen to good people all the time. That's one cycle that can never be broken. But not being accountable for your actions will no longer be tolerated. It will be ones civic duty to care for their offspring if they so decide to have them, government help will be provided to those that choose to be productive in society and volunteer to help those less fortunate than themselves. I have several programs. Those that don't, face the consequences of the wall.

_____________________对您的和平_____________________
Do leave it out, knock it on the head, have a word and wind yer neck in you minty bastard...

starsign's picture

I just don't get it, why do women do this? If you don't want the baby then give it up for adoption. Simple! Don't give birth and then dump the kid in the toilet. Tell someone, anyone, that you are pregnant and you do NOT want the baby. You are full term but you do NOT want the baby.

It's 2009 and people are STILL doing this. There are people willing and able to help you. Seek their help but do NOT leave your newborn baby alone to fend for itself.

angel_i's picture

Submitted by Thornhill on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 6:15pm.

Don't worry I have plenty of plans for the partners in crime...
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And that may be where we meet. At this juncture, I think I'd be kinda happy to leave that part up to you. IF YOU CAN FIND THEM!!! LOL! Surrsly, tho - I've been looking for my baby's dad for over a year. I didn't even try the first 8.

I did receive social assistance - you see, I am one of those women who had an "accident" ...but as of last Tuesday, I've also clocked 5000 hours(they gave me a lil certificate!) of free community service.
But they didn't ask me to do that - I just did. It's part of how I was raised, I guess - that whatever you take out, you gotta put back in. And that's just the stuff that the city can keep track of...it's, likely, closer to 6000...so I do feel like I've paid, what *I* considered to be, my debt several times over (I wasn't on it long - a coupla months to get on my feet.) It would have been way harder to pay that back without the agencies that made the systems available to me to help out.

I don't think you should outright pay for them either. But I think everyone needs a leg up now and then and if your family sucks, thereby leading you to friends that suck, thereby leading you to have a sucky outlook and a sucky ability to cope well, what do you do? How do you end the cycle?

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

Hysteria,

I am sorry for being jerky on the other posts. I just get irritated with the extreme bipartisanship when no amount of legistation can ever stop the crazies. But you admitted that too.

Thornhill's picture

@AI...Not a bad idea. that's a good foundation but I believe that the mothers should be contractually obligated to serve the full term, by which I mean until the child is of working age. I can find plenty of ways for the fathers to be punished, oh excuse me, obligated to public civil duty for starters somebody has to build the stoning walls. Somebody has to break the stones down to pitch able size. Somebody has to drag the dead bodies off and burn them. Don't worry I have plenty of plans for the partners in crime...

_____________________对您的和平_____________________
Do leave it out, knock it on the head, have a word and wind yer neck in you minty bastard...

angel_i's picture

Submitted by Thornhill on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 5:54pm.

and in other news, I just heard the Steve McNair got whacked.
********************************

Ooh. I just read his wiki (bizarrely all up to date)...it sounds like a jealous wife scenario, no?

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

angel_i's picture

@Thorny:

I do have a better idea. It just takes more work than public stoning. We've been trained to think we hate work (we really don't - we hate having to OVERwork, which always seems to be the case no matter how "rich" our nations are) so the chances of anyone wanting to put their back into it....

You could create a social program, whereby women who have such 'accidents' and are not able to support themselves become the people who take care of it all.

So - you have your baby and you and your baby are housed, fed, clothed. Room and Board. In return, you are an "employee" of the state. As part of your employment you're expected to be part of the system that keeps the facility running. The facility is designed as a daycare space, primarily - those who are not fit to work with kids can work in maintenance. If they have brains and still not fit to work with kids they can work admin. All "employees" are expected to complete a certain amount of training. All "employees" are supervised by qualified staff (a lot less staff than you'd need if the clients weren't also the employees).

They can have 2 months of training and 10 months of working. After that - they're on their own. This "daycare" doubles as an orphanage. They can elect to take their babies with them or leave them but they receive no support beyond that. After that year, they've had life experiences they never would have had, training, parenting and work experience, and they have not been let off of their responsibilities - they've done their time paying back to the agency that supported them.

The kids that are left behind are put to work with the younger children at the age of 13. At 16 they are free to leave. But they are not leaving a drug-addled, violent, stupidity ridden environment. And they've spent enough time raising children that they would want to be SURE not to let that same "accident" happen to them.

Of course, that's only the bare bones and it's a LOT more complicated than stoning.

But, in my experience people who are driven into "behaving" through fear and violence are people who learn to cheat and lie to avoid punishment rather than reach out to adopt new lifestyles.

The other problem with my idea is that it only holds the women responsible. The men, as usual, get a free pass.

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

Thornhill's picture

and in other news, I just heard the Steve McNair got whacked. The grim reaper needs to take a fukken day off...RIP Stevie Mac...

_____________________对您的和平_____________________
Do leave it out, knock it on the head, have a word and wind yer neck in you minty bastard...

Thornhill's picture

I have no problem with people having kids. Just the fact that they expect me to feed them, that's a whole nother kettle of fish....

_____________________对您的和平_____________________
Do leave it out, knock it on the head, have a word and wind yer neck in you minty bastard...

angel_i's picture

Submitted by Thornhill on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 4:36pm.

And so we have our next potential victim.
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O man. I lost SO much quality posting time to parenting! Ack! See why people do the things they do?!?

♥ Threadkilla!
It's "FACEBOOK" not "ASSBOOK" ~ Bart Simpson's lines, Season 20

The Audrey's picture

Submitted by speakit on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 4:36pm.
Submitted by The Audrey on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 4:32pm.
Submitted by speakit on Sat, 07/04/2009 - 4:27pm.
@Speakit.. I do recall mentioning something about people going to the forum and getting a little more than they bargained for.

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HA! Yeah.. I fell in love with someone. That's a lot more than I bargained for.
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I don't mean to butt in here, but did you really fall in love with someone there? I'm not making fun, seriously, I'm just impressed if you did. There's obviously a lot more to the Forum than I previously thought.

________________________________________________

Oh yes ma'am. I'm head over heels in love with him. I can think of little else. It was beautiful because, it wasn't based on the physical at all.
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Wow, good for you! I mean that. I hope you're serious, because I would feel like an idiot otherwise. :-p

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♥*♥*♥*♥*♥* Why do you ride women that look like men?! Why do you ride hippos?! *♥*♥*♥*♥*♥