Have You Filed Your Petition Yet?
Above is a screen shot of Claire Elisabeth Fields Cruise's Facebook page. Claire was filed three guardianship petitions in L.A. for all three of Michael Jackson's kids. Claire says SHE IS THE MOTHER. TMZ says that Claire is also queefing that she's married to Michael Jackson, but currently engaged to Blanket's biological father. And the lunatic frosting on the crazy cake is that Claire also swears she's the baby mama of one of Tommy Girl's kids.
I really don't need to comment on any of this since Claire's dog's face in the picture above is saying everything I need to say and more. That is the look of a dog who spends his afternoons sniffing the floor for Valium pills and trying to escape by flushing himself down the toilet. I fully co-sign and notarize his "Y ME" look.
And does Claire really want to rumble with a big ass butchie in a Three Wolf Moon t-shirt? Claire will be farting out Timberlands for months.
In other "Maury Should Get On This" news, Mark Lester (the dude from the Oliver! movie) is apparently saying that he never claimed to be Paris Jackson's biological father. Over the weekend, the esteemed journals of truths known as The News of the World ran an interview with Mark where he allegedly said he believed the jizz he donated to Michael was used to make Paris. A source close to the Jackson family told People, "They twisted his words around. He's not claiming to be the father of Paris Jackson." They OLIVER TWISTED him! I'm sorry, I'll see myself out.
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Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 08/10/2009 - 1:10pm.
OPEN POST PLEASE!
Seriously, this bitch is completely insane. How the hell is she not institutionalized?
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ditto that...
And she also wrote songs for Madonna, George Michael, Queen and gad knows who else! Or yea, Michael Jacksn too. And the Beatles catelogue used to belong to her.
You should see all her entries on Facebook - what's a ex-unofficial fiance?!!!
Crazy
And her http://twitter.com/ClaireCruise is craziest - with accusations of rape, date rape drugs against hr fiance, CEO, employee...
Agree - my hurt is hurting after trying to read http://www.myspace.com/clairecruise. How many famous men has she married, change their names for her, adore her, love her because you know - she is like the most beautifulest, glitterist, gorgeousness, sanest of any woman on planet earth and the whole solar system
This lady is seriously mentally ill. She believes that while she was an embreyo they took her eggs and gave them to other women in her family and that their children are her children. Along with Brad Pitt and it seems most of the children in the world.
Why this woman is allowed to walk the streets I have no idea. I'd be concerened if someone believed that my children were theirs. Nothings stopping her from having a complete fall out and kidnapping someones child.
I hope that the Jackson family gets a restraining order against her.
Sincerely,
Alana Smithee
I think we should all simply drink the koolaid that Jermaine Jackson sips. During his latest foray on Larry King, Jermaine stated, with a straight face, that all we have to do is look at Michael's children to know that Michael's their biological father.
Okay....and that's El Chupacabra right outside my window peering in.
I found a great dating site_____Wealthyromance .com______where you have the opportunity dreaming about dating a millionaire and make it true! u dont have to be a millionaire.but u can meet one. I thought everyone needed to meet some miracle after all the terrible stuff in the news and the economy___________________
People like this really exist? ...THE FUCK.
SHES GOT TO BE OUT HER FUKIN MIND
ok, i'm probably gonna regret it, but i sent her a friend request...in all actuality, her craziness reminds me of my mom..and we all have a soft spots for our moms, right? lol
Dayum. It seems there are a whole slew of people who might want to consider a restraining order against this nutter. I think I'll even get one, just in case.
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ASUUU MADREEE!!!!!
I'm surprised her dog hasn't commited suicide yet.
I want to poke Claire.
I want to send Claire a message.
Holy fucking WOW. I'm terribly embarrassed for this broad. Did you see her Myspace pics? She has one of 'George Carlin' who is a 'really good friend' but 'of course, she elongated his face in the pic'. My favorite is the one of Tom Cruise in disguise as her transsexual roommate. That I might believe.
did anyone check out her myspace page? she done tookeded the kanye out on that page. and her friends? should have known john mayer would be on there.
I fully support her.
The Zionist media has brainwashed you people so bad.
It's sad. You can't even receive this woman's truth without calling her 'crazy'.
Whatever.
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@ZiggyStardust:
I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!- angel_i
Submitted by loozer on Mon, 08/10/2009 - 1:26pm.
skeered of Crazy's Cattle Prod
but the name is kinda catchy, maybe we should market it?
Keep the loons away with Crazy's Cattle Prod! It can be yours with four easy payments of $19.99!
(Not legal in all areas, tax and shipping extra)
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Void in states where fraud is prohibited by law.
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"Oderint dum metuant." Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus (aka Caligula)
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Snowpiece - is that Leo/Bar/Gisele thing really from her myspace? Or did you make it up?
Because if it's from her ms - surely she is just taking the piss!
*cattle prods loozer for trying to make money of my crazy*
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"If I take a dog for a walk, apparently I`m f—king my dog!" - Gerard Butler
"Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh Crap, She's up!" -unknown
Submitted by loozer on Mon, 08/10/2009 - 1:26pm.
Bahahahaha! Love it!
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"If I take a dog for a walk, apparently I`m f—king my dog!" - Gerard Butler
"Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh Crap, She's up!" -unknown
(Pepper Sprays eyes)))))
Coma Caca!!
skeered of Crazy's Cattle Prod
but the name is kinda catchy, maybe we should market it?
Keep the loons away with Crazy's Cattle Prod! It can be yours with four easy payments of $19.99!
(Not legal in all areas, tax and shipping extra)
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Well, I had to follow you
Though you did not want me to
But that won't stop my lovin' you
I can't stay away, Blamin' it all...
Maybe we should take bets on who WON'T claim to be the parents of these kids.
Psychostrumpet is also a LIBRA! How dare she besmirch the bestest sign in the Zodiac with her insane ramblings!? You must be a Gemini to pull off that shit!
♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀
Chicago area 5K race 2009: http://rallyforautism.com/
Religion is regarded by the common people as true, by the wise as false, and by rulers as useful -- Seneca
Holy fucking hell. How many myspace pages does she have!?!?
OMG! She is insane!
Submitted by D.R. on Mon, 08/10/2009 - 1:17pm
How does she make less than 30k a year but be the CEO of all those businesses!!! Fucking nut!
@ Migraine
I gots a crotch of steel!!!!
*breaks Migraine's foot on crotch of steel*
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"If I take a dog for a walk, apparently I`m f—king my dog!" - Gerard Butler
"Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh Crap, She's up!" -unknown
Edited cuz I'm slow today and had to give props to DR for beating me to it!
"Small and broken..... but still good..... mostly...."
I just read some of her comments on her FB. What. A. fucking LOON!
Leo's girlfriend (NOT EX-girlfriend) is SOOOOO hot, too! In fact the long, lean supermodel even has booty. And you must know what that means... that's right, Bar Refaeli is yet another one of my biological daughters. Just like her brother... oh, I mean, boyfriend (NOT EX-boyfriend), Leonardo DiCaprio, who is my biological son. Leo and Bar really do look quite alike, don't you think?! Hey that's funny, Leo's former supermodel girlfriend, Gisele Bundchen (also my biological daughter), looked just like a female version of the disguise Leo wore when he went out with an unsuspecting me back in 1998... and Leo's current supermodel girlfriend (NOT EX-girlfriend), Bar, looks just like a female version of Leo. Now I understand everything: LEO CANNOT STOP DATING HIMSELF! On that note, let's check out how hot Leo would look in drag:
http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LnlvdXR1YmUuY29tL3dhdGNoP3Y9TFJISl8yaTBUbHMmZXVybD1odHRwJTNBJTJGJTJGcHJvZmlsZSUyRW15c3BhY2UlMkVjb20lMkZpbmRleCUyRWNmbSUzRmZ1c2VhY3Rpb24lM0R1c2VyJTJFdmlld3Byb2ZpbGUlMjZmcmllbmRpZCUzRDk1MzQzMjUw">
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Kara DioYOUKILLEDPAULA! SCRAGS BITCHES! MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
Here's her MySpace. It's worse.
http://www.myspace.com/clairecruise
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"Two whores don't make a right"-- M.K.
"Any guy who values stick thin and young over smarts and personality isn't worth it and has NOTHING interesting to say anyway."-- Mrs. Kravitz
*kicks CRAZY in the crotch for maiming the Dlisters*
SHE'S INSANE!
*tazes and cattle prods everyone for inappropriate using the word CRAZY*
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"If I take a dog for a walk, apparently I`m f—king my dog!" - Gerard Butler
"Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh Crap, She's up!" -unknown
Crazy- Thanks, I thought so, but thought maybe there was a way around it since I refuse to be part of the whole networking craze.
*whimpers*
I thought that I had a good financial reason to care.
*hides in burrow*
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"Oderint dum metuant." Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus (aka Caligula)
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Submitted by Race Bannon on Mon, 08/10/2009 - 1:11pm.
YES
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"If I take a dog for a walk, apparently I`m f—king my dog!" - Gerard Butler
"Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh Crap, She's up!" -unknown
Can you only get on Facebook to look at these things by signing up and becoming a Facebook member?
If you look at her pics, the crazy is dripping from her eyes!
*holds up cross*
Screw MJ. I'm the mother of Ricky Martin's kids. ¡pagúeme mi dinero, senior licker del pene!
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"F*CK OFF!" -- Harvey Yorke Price
OPEN POST PLEASE!
Seriously, this bitch is completely insane. How the hell is she not institutionalized?
It says on her Facebook profile that she likes many comedy shows and whatnot so this chick MIGHT be using facebook and myspace to write jokes. I didn't know anyone could be THIS crazy.
Check out her myspace pictures, she's claiming she's the Jolie-Pitt's real biological mother.. Pitt and Jolie included.
Anyway, this fucked up person is fugly to the bone. Sometimes she looks like a fugly woman, sometimes she looks like a fugly man.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
*Slaps forehead*
Now I understand! I was sitting here all impressed with your ability to impersonate crazy! Now...well, now, I'm just scared.
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If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh. Otherwise, they'll kill you. - Oscar Wilde
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*catlleprods Momus and tazes Raul and M.E.*
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"If I take a dog for a walk, apparently I`m f—king my dog!" - Gerard Butler
"Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh Crap, She's up!" -unknown
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 08/10/2009 - 1:04pm.
MB LOL that's from this loons myspace page
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BWAHAHAHAA!! Someone should invite her to Dlisted to be the new Comingback.
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I'm pinching yo nipples.
"I'll see myself out.." I can so picture MK walking out of the imaginary room backwards, with pulverized pun in hand...
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"I'll go unlock the kids and make us all breakfast." - Theodore Bagwell
OK, so after reading snowpieces cut and paste of her ramblings, I redact my call out to Maury and ask now for an exorcist.
It's almost 1:00 and I think I am still drunk from last night. HANG.OVER. Reading the shit Snowy copied from el psycho's myspace not only confused the shit out of me but also made me dizzy, then vomit.
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"Did you KNOW it is snowing in my room, god dammit!?"
Submitted by EastEndGirl on Mon, 08/10/2009 - 12:58pm.
Momus, first thing I thought, how do they let obviously mentally ill people waste court time?
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In California, every single civil pleading is reviewed by a court research attorney. These attorneys must review the pleading in a manner most favorable to plaintiff. Unless a person is under a conservatorship (e.g., Britney) or has been declared a vexatious litigant, a person can file a civil petition and have it taken seriously.
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"Oderint dum metuant." Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus (aka Caligula)
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MB LOL that's from this loons myspace page, I can't take credit for that trainwreck!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Kara DioYOUKILLEDPAULA! SCRAGS BITCHES! MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
I bet you this bitch wears a tin foil hat, FOR REAL!
@Snowpiece: I don't know what drugs you're taking, but you definitely got your money's worth.
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If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh. Otherwise, they'll kill you. - Oscar Wilde
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And her dog is the biological father of the octuplets.