A Horsey Making An Ass Out Of Itself On Live Television
Spencer Pratt went through Brit Brit's trash can, pulled out her 2000 MTV VMAs outfit, brushed the Cheetos off, slid it over the factory-defected dildo that is Heidi Montag and pushed her out on the international stage during last night's Miss Universe pageant. He should've pushed her off the planet instead, because that was one of the biggest displays of fuckery I've every seen! This is why some people hate America!
You know, it was wrong of me to compare her to a dildo, because even used-up, ass dust-covered plastic fuck toys have more rhythm than this tranny pony!
If you took an elderly albino gorilla who was suffering from a serious case of Tourettes, got him drunk on the cheapest vodka, made him watch every episode The Hills, hit him over the head 12 times with a copper pot, spun him around 300 times while saying Spencer Pratt's name and then forced him to do this routine, he would still do a better job than Heidi Montag.
The only thing Heidi's "body language" is telling me is: FAIL.
And if you don't feel like making your brain bleed this early in the morning, just watch this video instead. It's the same thing sans Heidi's annoying ass face.
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Oh god this bitch is so fucking dumb! She can't even keep up with the backup dancers. She is so lame. And look how puffed out she is lol.
Pathetic, nasty, plastic, thick as a brick, scum sucking bitch.
HAHAHAHA i love the title of this post. and moving your hands and sprinting around is NOT a performance bitch. its just a hot mess.. this untalented hack just needs to GIVE IT UP!
in the united states alone, about 4 million cats and dogs are euthanized each year for lack of homes to adopt them. YOU can help stop this.. spay or neuter your pet. please don't breed or buy while homeless animals die! and support animal shelters<3
"This is why some people hate America!"
Can you blame them? First 8 years of Dubya, and now this shit? Forget al-queda, we'll be lucky if Canada and Mexico don't launch over this abomination.
It looked like she was counting off the "dance moves" (I use that term generously) in her head - notice at :31 seconds..1..2..3..4...plant feet, dip, try to shake the fake tits...ooops, couldn't get 'em to move...1...2...3...4.....
JIHAD...yiyiyiyiyiyi (or whatever that high pitched yelping/clucking sound the women in the beekeeper outfits always make when they're pissed off)
OMG!!! It's like a final scene of that MTV show "Made" where the awkward, rhythmless, fat girl decides she wants to be a pop star and they teach her some moves and put her in front of a paid audience that claps for encouragement. Loser.
She is like a stinking, weepy turd in a broken toilet that someone just needs to please please FLUSH!!!!
Submitted by clarketron on Mon, 08/24/2009 - 8:19pm.
4. did you notice the "WOOOO!!!!" tracks following her performance?
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you made it to the end? wow. You have a strong stomach, i give you that.
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www.walkms.org
do it for a fellow ho!
Wow! That's some ORIGINAL shit!
Submitted by Starqz on Mon, 08/24/2009 - 3:43pm.
SHe SUCKS!
I'm sure she is not even good at Sucking.... maybe if Spencer puts some sugar cubes on his dick or something.
....But that’s vulgar and gross to me: exploding assholes, exploding brains. And Christian sites are vulgar to me, too. Michael K
I don't even know where to start?
I guess my thoughts are best expressed in list format:
1. so that's how low Miss Universe's ratings have sunk, huh? they let Heidi montag "perform"
2. what the hell kind of GD outfit is she wearing?
3. when did Miss universe start having performances?
4. did you notice the "WOOOO!!!!" tracks following her performance? No one was "WOOOOO!!!"ing unless they had an open bar in the lobby
5. WTF is this world (Universe) coming to? SERIOUSLY!!!???!!! the four horsemen are about to show up
6. She's about as coordinated for dancing as a pony born 30 minutes ago
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-u4Nyf4BUlg
7. SERIOUSLY! How do we stop this?! this has to STOP!
Submitted by peaches80 on Mon, 08/24/2009 - 3:11pm.
it wasn't great , but i kind of watched till the end ......... ok i kind of like it , i feel ashamed .
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You should be ashamed!!!
Wow, that was a truly horrific performance, what is she thinking!?!
Dear Vince Clarke,
Why did you let this dumb bitch
sample your music?? why why why???
weeps
Im sick of these skanks butchering good music.
depeche mode then last week new order and now THIS! insanity
Umm, okay. Damn, she was really trying to be Britney there, wasn't she? Epic FAIL.
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“A, B, C, D, E-E-E!” --Brian Kinney
Wow, Brit looks like she's lost some weight. *eye roll*
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Kindness is in our power, even when fondness is not.
Galiléo
SHe SUCKS!
it wasn't great , but i kind of watched till the end ......... ok i kind of like it , i feel ashamed .
Submitted by D.R. on Mon, 08/24/2009 - 1:50pm.
Why did she have to use "Situation"? Why?!
THAT'S WHAT I WAS THINKING!!! That was horrendous.
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Douchechill!
They were only Yaz in the States. I forgot that too:)
♥ Threadkilla!
As an Evil Overlord, I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that using such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117. #15
Ugh-I *loved* Yaz, and I LOOOOOVED "Situation". She is ridiculous, and her moves looked even worse with those giant, dark shoes on her hooves.
"Blue eyed dressed for every situation..." Memories!
It was wicked bad, but honestly, I don't think her dancing is in less shitastic than the douchebaggery that is Mariah Hairy, KWIM?
@Tamzin
.............
Every time I see your profile photo I stop, look at it and drool.... The expression on your little babygirl's face is so precious.
Congratulations on your adorable bundle of joy!
Why did she have to use "Situation"? Why?!
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"Two whores don't make a right"-- M.K.
"Any guy who values stick thin and young over smarts and personality isn't worth it and has NOTHING interesting to say anyway."-- Mrs. Kravitz
People do exaggerate.
She is lip-synching. So is everyone else.
Britney Spears lip-synchs and barely dances any more. This is about 20 times better than anything you will find in the Circus tour.
The song is OK. She can't sing, but the dancing is nice to look at.
If people didn't know who she was, they probably wouldn't be so negative about the performance. Maybe not worthy of standing on an international stage, but definitely not terrible.
weeps for Yaz (Yazoo? wtf?) and their massacred 80s classic. :(
though I don't see much difference in her lame "dance" moves and the Cheetolera's. same cheerleader meets stripper meets white rapper choreography. poorly done, sure, but meh...
So funny - Ceiling Eyes reaction to that Blackout Video (her face says: It's stinky! - no, really, it does!)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJu9jlf8kWE&NR=1
♥ Threadkilla!
As an Evil Overlord, I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that using such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117. #15
that same routine won first place at my high school talent show. it wasn't the talent that won it was the mild downs, like tina chen on youtube. i'd rather see the russian cat circus than this porqueria!
Wow, that was the most un-original thing I have ever seen. She is trying to be Britney but she lacks even the dance talent to get by with limited singing talent.
"This is the reason some people hate America" too funny. It is true though, I've lived in Europe for several years and many people see this type of crap as being acceptable by Americans. I love my neighbors to the south, but I say BOYCOTT MONTAG!!!!!
It's the only way she's go away for good.
Common sense is the genius of humanity - Goethe
Love it! Whatever that is she's wearing on her bottom half is making her legs look shorter. How did she think that looked good? Can't believe someone actually taught her a dance routine. Ka-dooz to them. While I'm here, wasn't she flapping her vag lips that she's a christian or some b.s. like that? So ... when do christians hor themselves out on stage? Oh, wait - I forgot - Chestica started that trend. Never mind.
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O_o. Paris Hilton. Beware of my fucked up eye. It's bigger than the other.
O yeah - this shit vid:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGqSz0_L72k Ugh.
But I must say. I really need to vent about just about anything today so thanks, babe;)
♥ Threadkilla!
As an Evil Overlord, I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that using such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117. #15
@martin k.:
Hey I know you! You're MK's next boyfriend!
(just so you know I caught that:) It was a little late yesterday)
ON TOPIC! Finally! Something I can sink my teeth into!
She ripped off Yazoo! THIS IS WAY BETTER!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wPiMbg4yVWk
She has fat thighs. She needs to stop playin'
I think she forgot her dance moves. She has too much boobies for those dance moves anyway. Who does she think she is - Beyawnce?
I watched her video (for some other song cuz this one -and every other one- sucked WAY too bad but, as a bunch of nothingness, I don't mind this one too much.) Her voice is so fixed it doesn't even matter that it's her but this video is SHIT! It looks like it was made by some 15 year old boy. Did Spencer make this shit? It's like anywhore's vid on Youtube. She's so over the top and stupid looking. She doesn't even do "sexy looking" right. Nevermind "pop star". They're so fucking persistent. I hope Lauren Conrad hates herself for bringing this shit into the light.
♥ Threadkilla!
As an Evil Overlord, I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that using such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117. #15
no one sent a memo to the dancing monkeys that they should be doing what Heidi-ho was doing.
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still...TEAM VINCE BITCHES
"theenk you, theenk youuu ..."
heidi next time try imitating the voice of the track you just playbacked to !
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http://pocagentesabe.com
That performance fails on so many levels.
I'M EMBARRRASSED THAT SHE WAS REPRESENTING FOR THE U.S.
BRUTAL. Yaz must be in a serious financial hole to let this strumpet nuke their dance floor classic like this.Killed it @ the 1:00 mark.
IG, I swear! I watched just waiting for her to fall...instead I was tortured by her "dancing".
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Don't put another dime in the jukebox, I don't want to hear that song no more
parissucksliterally on Mon, 08/24/2009 - 11:20am.
I saw this on FadedYouth last night....the title was "Heidi Montag FAILS" but I read it as "FALLS". So I watched the horrible clip waiting for her to eat shit. Then I re-read the title.....oops.
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Hee hee--- wishful thinking?
MK, what did we do to you to show us that? I mean, are you mad or something? hehehe
Submitted by Miss Priss on Mon, 08/24/2009 - 9:26am.
OMG!!!
I am totally pissed off!
I hope they didn't pay her until after the fact, as this performance is worth about 5 dolla
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more like 5 pesos
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pussies going spastic usually make me feel queasy - MK
Submitted by WeHaveToGoBack on Mon, 08/24/2009 - 11:21am.
The train wreck was far more entertaining
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I completely agree! At least I could sit through that whole thing...
Even her lip-syncing sucked!
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pussies going spastic usually make me feel queasy - MK
can we all agree to change their last name to Goaway.
Heidi & Spencer Goaway.
I love the opening- she's a celebrity! HA! Thanks for reminding me...
The train wreck was far more entertaining
I saw this on FadedYouth last night....the title was "Heidi Montag FAILS" but I read it as "FALLS". So I watched the horrible clip waiting for her to eat shit. Then I re-read the title.....oops.
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Don't put another dime in the jukebox, I don't want to hear that song no more
Wow, this chick is having an epileptic seizure on national tv, and everyone's just sitting there watching... sad state of affairs right there.
"Punks jump up to get beat down!"
The 39 seconds I watched were too painful.
*stabs out eardrums*
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!
WHY?WHY?WHY?
that was like...AMERICAN IDOL but,worse!
One of the many things about this I didn't get was her choice of footwear.
Are those reeboks?
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"Who gone check me boo?"
-Crackhead cuntbitch Sheree, Real Housewives Atlanta
Was that for real?
Is she knock-kneed?
carollani.com
@carollani