Granny's Got A Hoe!
A local news crew went to the Cocoa, FL home of a woman who called the police after finding out her 15-year-old daughter was working at a strip club and they were greeted by a rabid memaw with a dangerous hoe! The memaw must have been in the middle of a really good Matlock episode while sipping on a cup of Ovaltine and brandy, because she was not pleased when the reporter knocked on the door! When the memaw noticed there was a camera on her, she attacked that shit with a garden hoe! Yes, she was protecting a stripper with a hoe. This shit writes itself.
Like I've said a million times before: abuelitas are not the one! They will grab whatever is in their reach to properly show you that you are in the wrong! Unfortunately for that camera, a garden hoe happened to be the closest object. Granny will hoe a bitch up!
The West Coast has Quween on the Scene, and the East Coast has Granny Garden Hoe! They should join forces. Cameras will quiver in fear!
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haha funny stuff. go granny go!
MagnificentChichis...welcome! After years of surfing, this dude, who married a freaking pineapple, made me sign up
http://www.dlisted.com/node/28711
& Granny is protecting her family...is she rental?
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Proud love child of Oprah Winfrey & Bill Gates
After decades reading this site, I want you to know that THIS POST finally forced me to register and get an account!
I stand in awe, not just of the hoeing, but the fact that she manages to target the camera without actually gashing the cameraman's head. Do you SEE the left-handed swing she has going? This is ninja hoeing at its finest!
I used to keep a baseball bat by the bed, but now I know what should be there: a hoe!
And whoever thinks these news people don't deserve it, please! Don't come to my house. I'll be ready for you.
I spent a lot of time in Cocoa for my work. I always thought it was a quiet, boring town. Guess I was wrong.
Listen people...Trini had it right. That hoe should have been used earlier and NOT on the camera man.
I must give kadooze to the cameraman. He didn't stop filming even while being threatened with a ho. That's dedication.
We don't need a vote: Hot Slut of the Month by acclimation !
dang!!!! the irony.
puurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr,
moosh
http://www.twolia.com/blogs/teacups-and-couture/
i was born in Broward County hospital. *runs and hides due to sheer embarrassment*)
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"Honey, i am more man than you'll ever be and more woman than you'll ever get"
Carwash 1976
Isn't a 15 year old a minor? Isn't a minor's name usually protected? Why would you film and show the minor's relatives on a news report and name them by name when they made it clear they do not want to be filmed? I'll tell you why- you got a female reporterette (white) and a "Just look at these monkeys" story for the lead off that night.
rukiddingme: Well said. Really.
@snowy: Watchootalkin'bout? You tryna say I'm mean? I can't be mean! I'm an angel;)
♥ Threadkilla!
As an Evil Overlord, I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that using such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117. #15
I agree. The other day I'm sitting at Central Park North (the more ghetto part of the park) when this lady starts yelling and cursing at a bunch of teens because she thought they were laughing at her. She was threatening to beat their asses while her five year old daughter was holding her hand. I thought to myself, that poor kid does not have a chance in hell.
Submitted by rukiddingme on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 12:37pm.
Can't say as I blame her for getting pissed about a camera crew showing up on her front porch, but to have yourself filmed while committing assault is just dumb. If this is the caliber of adults this teenager came from, I can see why she's in trouble at 15. What a shame.
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That explains it. Now I know why a moderately amusing comedian got her own tv show.
ha ha angel, I started to type the same thing and then decided it was mean, LOL
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Kara DioYOUKILLEDPAULA! SCRAGS BITCHES! MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
McNuggett816
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This is the wrong thread! Just to get your facts straight! Holler:)
♥ Threadkilla!
As an Evil Overlord, I will never employ any device with a digital countdown. If I find that using such a device is absolutely unavoidable, I will set it to activate when the counter reaches 117. #15
@ madam s
.............
Grandma probably has a couple of shovels and a rake in her bedroom, and a goat.
Ted is NOT the CEO of Comcast-rather the Pres. of E! with is a Comcast owned network... just to get your facts straight! Holler.
Can't say as I blame her for getting pissed about a camera crew showing up on her front porch, but to have yourself filmed while committing assault is just dumb. If this is the caliber of adults this teenager came from, I can see why she's in trouble at 15. What a shame.
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Submitted by anony54321 on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 12:19pm.
i think that cameraman and those newspeople ...had no right to stay.
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It didn't look to me like they were hanging around waiting for Granny to come back out wielding a lawnmower.
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Bottom-feeder.
If the 15-year-old has not been in school since 7th grade, then the mother should be charged. In our area she would be arrested. I mean, she has not been in school for one, maybe two years. Letting your kid skip school for year and now knowing she was working as a stripper? Wonderful mother.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
i think that cameraman and those newspeople suck ass. she clearly didnt want them there, and they had no right to stay.
fucking motherfuckers.
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The McCanns Did It
Madder than fish grease.
i still can't get over the fact that there's a place called Cocoa.
Figures...
coco....ahahaha
Submitted by madam s. on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:56am.
Ahhaha freebird,
TeeTee! Speaking of which... I just watched a couple of episodes of the season of Reno 911 with those new guys and no Garcia or Clementine (WHY?!!!) and I can not even BELIEVE how shitty it was. I mean, I really liked the seasons of Reno with the original cast, and I have never seen a show go from pretty damn funny to one of the shittiest, seemingly written by highschool boys, obnoxious drivel as that! I was kind of shocked. They should have let it die when they let those original people go.
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Maybe why it got canceled.
Submitted by Trini on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:51am.
Submitted by Coffey on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:46am.
I LOVE your freaking avatar! Nice find. I don't mean to brag, (actually I do lol) reminds me of my beautiful lips.
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Thanks Trini. The art is by Sandra Knuyt. She does these gorgeous and sexy portraits of women smoking cigars.
Also, in response to the question about why Madea 2.0 has a hoe indoors: She probably used it to whoop the other ho's ass before bootin' her up outta the house.
"Punks jump up to get beat down!"
Ahhaha freebird,
TeeTee! Speaking of which... I just watched a couple of episodes of the season of Reno 911 with those new guys and no Garcia or Clementine (WHY?!!!) and I can not even BELIEVE how shitty it was. I mean, I really liked the seasons of Reno with the original cast, and I have never seen a show go from pretty damn funny to one of the shittiest, seemingly written by highschool boys, obnoxious drivel as that! I was kind of shocked. They should have let it die when they let those original people go.
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ASUUU MADREEE!!!!!
@Raul Duke: Jinxity Snap!
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Bottom-feeder.
Hope that bitch was slapped with aggrivated assault..Damn!
Anyone seen M.E. yet?
BTW, she did have a narstay infection in that finger and is on antibiotics.
Plecostomus OH SNAP!
Submitted by madam s. on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:51am.
Haha, that's a damn good point. And why was it readily available at the door? She probably does this shit all the time.
Submitted by madam s. on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:51am.
I want to know why that woman owns a garden hoe since there are no garden beds in her yard. Plus she keeps it inside? Curious.
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CUZ SOMEONE DONE LOST THE MUTHERFUCKIN' REMOTE!
Submitted by madam s. on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:51am.
I want to know why that woman owns a garden hoe since there are no garden beds in her yard. Plus she keeps it inside? Curious.
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Either that's how she reaches for the remote, or that's how she changes the channels.
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Bottom-feeder.
Fudgesicles....thinking about my dancing skills at the age of 15, if anyone had seen me dance then, I would have been enrolled for the Special Olympics.
Submitted by Coffey on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:46am.
I LOVE your freaking avatar! Nice find. I don't mean to brag, (actually I do lol) reminds me of my beautiful lips.
I want to know why that woman owns a garden hoe since there are no garden beds in her yard. Plus she keeps it inside? Curious.
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ASUUU MADREEE!!!!!
You go, Memaw! I feel like taking my "Swingline" to anyone that comes in my fucking cubicle.
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Cock-a-doodle-do, any cock will do!
Jack- I have always liked Ho's that are swingers! TEAM HO SWINGER'S and TEAM TIRE NECKS!
Madea 2.0 was wielding that hoe like a straight up ninja warrior... Ghost Dog game proper. The earth SHOOK when she slammed that door too.
Bet that taught those meddling reporters.
"Punks jump up to get beat down!"
Team HO SWINGERS!!!
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"I HAVE NO MORE GOTTDAMN CUPCAKES!" 08.18.09 The delicate flower that is Mrs. Bradiful Bitch
She's just mad her granddaughter isn't sharing her cash. Trust.
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"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by snowpiece on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:42am.
Raul, no I meant GREAT Grandma, little truant stripper will be preggers and a candidate for MANY repeated visits to Maury soon enough
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Jacksonville Jaguars...you ARE the father!
Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 08/26/2009 - 11:35am.
Jesus! It's hard to believe that there are people this trashy breathing the same air as the rest of us. How the fuck do you make it to middle age and still think it's ok to chase after another human being with a garden tool as a weapon? Charge this savage with assault with a deadly weapon and throw her trash ass in jail. Maybe she'll die there and save the taxpayers some money.
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HARSH!!
Okay. Well, SOMEone ain't doin' they job as the girl's momma or guardian.
Damn, that bitch ain't askeert to USE that hoe, is she?! Why don't she try that on her grandbaby whose out strippin' and shit? Regulate on that little girl's ass. Then MAYBE she won't be on a gawt damn pole. SHIT.
I feel like gardening some ***herbs***
Coma Caca!!
Raul, no I meant GREAT Grandma, little truant stripper will be preggers and a candidate for MANY repeated visits to Maury soon enough
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Kara DioYOUKILLEDPAULA! SCRAGS BITCHES! MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
At lest someone in the family HAS a job.
Snowy, that IS granny! Sluttsville, educated guess.
LOL@Snowpiece's "Necks" comment.