Vodka Tampons & Anal Beer Bongs: It's The Thing In Arizona
A while ago there was an episode of The Doctors where they showed us all how to get the sweet nectar in our system on the down low. The key words being "down low." According to the episode, teens are getting their fix by shoving vodka tampons up their snatches and sticking a beer bong up their no-nos. This brings new meaning to the term "drunk pussy."
Well, ABC15 in Arizona says that vodka tampons and anal beer bongs are all the rage with kids as young as 12, because it's a way for them to get boozed without much detection. Stephanie Siete of a substance abuse center in Arizona said, "It's quicker absorption, it's hidden and it's new. For females, they're damaging their reproductive system." Yeah, but they won't notice that their vagina cave is dying a slow death, because they will be waaaaaaasted. Paaaartay while your pussay fries!
Stephanie added that kids in Arizona are also doing it Prince Hot Ginge-style by snorting vodka from the bottle.
Kids these fucking days! When I was 12, we were soooo not hardcore. We just used to get high by freebasing DayQuil and injecting battery acid between our toes.
And yes, getting drunk by sticking a vodka tampon up my ass is tempting, but the last thing I need is another visit to the free clinic. Methinks the "wind blew it up my ass" excuse won't work on them. Besides, who the hell wants to burn up their genitals?!!!! For some whores, the pussy and asshole is their check to cash. So basically you are burning up money! No fuck no.