Jon Gosselin Is A Lame Fish
Anyone who has seen at least one episode Douche & Cunt Plus 8 knows that Kate Gosselin knows how to slowly rip Jon's nutsack from the root with her words of cuntness and master shank eye (my hero). We know this, but Jon felt the need to state the obvious during an interview with Good Morning America.
Jon cried, "I took a lot of abuse from her. I was put down. She'll call me like, almost like a lame fish. Like I wasn't going anywhere."
Is lame fish related to Gay Fish at all, because that would answer many of life's greatest douche mysteries.
Jon went on to moan like a toddler that Kate regularly left him with the child army while she went off trying to make some money, "Well, excuse me, I'm taking care of the kids. She's on book tours, she's doing all these things. You know, she's gone a week. You know, comes back. Packs up and leaves again. I'm standing there like, 'Oh, OK. Your mom's gone again.'"
While it is entertaining watching these two make complete assholes out of themselves in the media, they should really be talking to a team of trained psychiatric professionals in the comfort of a padded room for two.
It's absolutely hilarious that these twats are always whining about how the media won't leave their asses alone, yet they are always butt fucking us with interview after interview. Every time I turn around, one of them is blabbing to someone.
When are they both going to pay a little visit to the Dog Whisperer so that Cesar Milan can put a bark collar on the both of 'em.
Here's some pictures of Ed Hardy's butt buddy and his glamorous mother in Las Vegas a couple of days ago.
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Well Jon, you quit your fucking day job to sit and mooch off your children. That alone doesn't make you much of a man in my book. Especially when you are spending your children's money on unattractive 20 yr old girls and dickbag clothes. You are constantly going on TV bad mouthing the mother of your fucking children sounding like a fucking pussy tattletail because she picked on you and was a big fat meanie. If you were anything resembling a sensible man with an ounce of class, you would shut the fuck up for the sake of your children in public, even if your wife (you are still married) had cut your fucking balls off, your children are going to resent your stupid fucking ass for this. Remember that because you might need to borrow some money from them in a couple of years.
And to DARE complain about having to be with your OWN children that you CHOSE to have, you sure have some fucking nerve, asshole, acting like it's a fucking chore. Not a chore to cash those checks that Kate is out earning, is it?
WHEN ARE THEY GONNA GO THE FUCK AWAY???
"WHO ORDERED THE HAMBURGER WITH AIDS?"
So, what was this fucker's plan after he jizzed in a cup and impregnated Kate? Living off government cheese while Kate sees to the kids so he can play Guitar Hero? I know Kate is a cunt but at least she is a hard working cunt and that is what matters when the future of so many kids are at stake.
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Let me dirty up your mind.
You can tell John is sick of being a dad. He seems so easily annoyed w/ the younger kids. You can tell he prefers the older girls. Especially Cara, who enjoys the same type of outdoor stuff.
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 11:42am.
Pennyroyal: Don't underestimate the blond gene. My blue-eyed, blonde aunt married a Greek man and her kids came out blue/blonde. HER son married a Greek woman and their daughter came out blue/blonde. The kid is 3/4 full-on Greek and she looks like a Swede. My grandfather's blue/blonde genes were VERY powerful.
Also, I know a Chinese woman (of the very tall with sharp cheekbones genes, maybe upper Mongolian) and a German man who have the most EXQUISITE children ever. They have darker skin, green eyes, dusky blond hair; they
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I know from my genetics class that it is possible for the blond/blue to express itself in the child even if the parents don't both express it themselves. Both parents have to have the recessive gene and if the lottery of our makeup chooses those 2 recessive genes, people who are not blond/blue can have children who are. It's just that because those genes are recessive they are not being selected nearly as much as the dominant brown hair and eye combo. I am the only blond/blue in my family so I definitely know it's possible. I am curious to see now how children are going to look now that biracial kids are becoming a larger population. I always thought asian/white people had the most beautiful kids but not so much with some of Jon and Kates. Sorry for the genetics lesson everyone. ;-)
Both these assholes need to stfu.
To NitWitty.
Its the fold in the eyes.
My son has Down Syndrome and he is pretty cute. That being said Hannah Gosselin has always been my favorite of the kids because she looks the most like my son with DS.
My son is the best of all of us. 1 million times better than Jon Douchlin.
There are lots of episodes of the shows that he is a real jerk.
He has NO patience with the kids at all. Just watch an episode where he is home all day with them. He didn't like being with the kids all the time. Why doesnt he just say that.
Who hires a bartender/babysitter who brings her own baby to their house?
If the only help I could get from someone with another baby I believe I would pass.
And he his holding and kissing this strangers baby. Who is this person?
You all are going to love this quote.
Kate says in People Magizine that her and Jon were constantly called "Barbie & Ken" She said "if I heard it once, I heard it a million times"
Kate was attractive but Barbie? Even when he was young he was not even close to being considered a Ken.
Stop. Just stop.
*leaving and not coming back to anything remotely Goss*
Is he going shopping for pants again? He gets fatter by the day. Purdy soon he is going to look like K-Well-Fed.
Check K "Well Fed" here:
http://www.tmz.com/2009/09/01/k-fed-swimming-for-two/
Submitted by greenfinch on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 12:41pm.
you are forgetting that greeks were orginially blonde and blue eyed and it wasnt until the invasion of the turks that the dark genes were introduced..so most greek people prob still carry those recessive genes.
that being said team blonde hair blue eyes!
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That's a retarded history nazis came up with...their point more or less was that ancient Greeks had german origin....everytime someone in ancient Greece was blonde or blue-eyed they were being called the Blonde(Achlilleus)or the Blue-eyed(Athena)...we are of mediterranean origin and we have never been blonder, do you think we would use the expression blonde, blue-eyed barbarians for northern people in the ancient times if we looked like swedes? Read some Aristotle instead of nazi shit
I hate this douche, his cunt of a wife, and his meth face girlfriend. Why are they on the cover of magazines? They aren't even of worthy of being on the cover of the penny saver.
I love that picture of him. In fact, I think I have seen fish with those same lips.
It's true, though, she did abuse him, but he should have been able to put a stop to it and made her stop doing it when she started instead of taking it like a lame fish.
For a man who doesn't work he sure complains about his ex-wife making all the money. Who else would keep him in his Ed Hardy and CZ studs?
The picture of him holding the crystal money bag says it all. He probably douches his no-no with money.
Submitted by Mel on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 12:56pm.
well i dont know if thats the one they reshowed last night but watching jon dress up in womens clothes and hang out with his daugthers not my idea of entertainment.
Just heard that Monday's first run episode scored under a Million viewers. Jon and Kate's 15 minutes is nearing its end. Hope they saved some cash because word on the street is TLC is cancelling this after this season.
STFU already and run along, the short bus is about to leave without you.
if they cared about their kids as much as they both CLAIM to they wouldnt be bad mouthing each other and behaving like children publicly.
that goes for both these assholes
Now that is one sunburned douche!
Submitted by anonymous7643 on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 12:17pm
but at the same time she married him knowing what she was getting...so i dunno. you make your own bed sort of thing.ya know?
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 11:42am
you are forgetting that greeks were orginially blonde and blue eyed and it wasnt until the invasion of the turks that the dark genes were introduced..so most greek people prob still carry those recessive genes.
that being said team blonde hair blue eyes!
Submitted by Hekki on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 11:42am.
Pennyroyal: Don't underestimate the blond gene. My blue-eyed, blonde aunt married a Greek man and her kids came out blue/blonde. HER son married a Greek woman and their daughter came out blue/blonde. The kid is 3/4 full-on Greek and she looks like a Swede. My grandfather's blue/blonde genes were VERY powerful.
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In case you didn't notice Greeks, Italians, South French, and generally people in Mediterranean Europe are white so they carry the recessive blue/blonde genes.
A case of arrested development if I ever saw one. I guess this is what happens when people get married and have kids before they are ready.
If you were uncomfortable with your wife bringing home the bacon (however controversially she has done so), go out and find a fucking job. he has admitted elsewhere that were it not for kate, he would probably still be living at home with no ambitions.
"lame fish" is about as nice a term as I can think of for this boob. God, what a fucking waste of space. Lucky you, you received fifteen minutes of fame from jerking off into a plastic cup and leeching off the public. Now go away.
Jon's gonna get his when Kate reads this article. The Wrath of Cunt.
Pleco - your avie... you fucking rock!
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"I HAVE NO MORE GOTTDAMN CUPCAKES!" 08.18.09 The delicate flower that is Mrs. Bradiful Bitch
You said it PERFECT MK: Douche & Cunt - although if I were him I'd have left her years ago, there would have never been the litter of "6."
XXY! I missed you yesterday! HAI!
ONT: Whatever. Shaddap, ya lame fish!
♥ Threadkilla!
So now you try to pull the race card and it just backfires in your face hard cuz you know we don't play that black and white shit.
Bully
I still say he must be related to Tattoo from Fantasy Island.
Dear Jon,
You ARE lame. You AREN'T going anywhere.
Christ, any retard can see that. Kate was probably just trying to push him to get him to do SOMETHING, albeit she did it in a an overly-bitch way.
As for him whining about taking care of the kids while she's out making money, he needs to STFU. Money is money, and she was making it dude. Quit whining about taking care of YOUR OWN kids. Besides, wasn't Kate left with them everyday back when Jon had a computer job? Suck it up and deal with it you swollen, LAME douchebag.
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
Submitted by No Words on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 11:45am.
Uh, she called you Gay Fish...get it straight.
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Methinks she did.
She'll call me like, almost like a lame fish.
He was obviously waffling, the twatwaffle.
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Bottom-feeder.
Does lame fish mean boring fuck? B/c that would explain why she went to an outside babymaker after she had twins the natural way.
you're about as useful as a cock-flavored lollipop - Patches O'Houlihan
Holy mother of god this guy is an ugly fucking retard. I'd pluck and eat the methbrows before I'd fuck this loser.
Holy mother of god this guy is an ugly fucking retard. I'd pluck and eat the methbrows before I'd fuck this loser.
Now I know where he got his *special* looks from.
http://www.aniboom.com/animation-video/388945/Ronn--Kaytey-Plus-80/
Yay for humor!
Uh, she called you Gay Fish...get it straight. Unless Lame Fish is Gay Fish's developmentally delayed brother.
Pennyroyal: Don't underestimate the blond gene. My blue-eyed, blonde aunt married a Greek man and her kids came out blue/blonde. HER son married a Greek woman and their daughter came out blue/blonde. The kid is 3/4 full-on Greek and she looks like a Swede. My grandfather's blue/blonde genes were VERY powerful.
Also, I know a Chinese woman (of the very tall with sharp cheekbones genes, maybe upper Mongolian) and a German man who have the most EXQUISITE children ever. They have darker skin, green eyes, dusky blond hair; they're also tall and have the cheekbones. They're to die for, those kids.
It would be SO refreshing if both Kunt and Douchebag pretended to have some class and stop yapping on t.v. about how much they hate each other.
And of course it doesn't occur to either of them that someday their army of brats will be able download all of mommy and daddy's bitchy interviews on Youtube.
They both stink on ice.
My friend recommended me a very interesting place
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My friend recommended me a very interesting place
________ S e e k R i c h. C O M_________ .It is the best dating club for seeking the rich singles, beauties and even hot celebs..what's the most important is:you dont have to be a millionaire.but you can meet one. I think everyone need to meet some miracle after all the terrible stuff in the news and the economy .______TTTTTTTT_____
My friend recommended me a very interesting place
________ S e e k R i c h. C O M_________ .It is the best dating club for seeking the rich singles, beauties and even hot celebs..what's the most important is:you dont have to be a millionaire.but you can meet one. I think everyone need to meet some miracle after all the terrible stuff in the news and the economy .______TTTTTTTT_____
Hee hee. I care!!!
How could you not choose the pic of him and Mother looking through Big-Bottom jeans? 34 inch MY ass, he's got to be up in the 42-44.
Submitted by xxyxz on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 11:20am.
Farrah
*hugs* I've been in hiding! lol. Do you have a twitter account?
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you're twatting now? damn. I don't have a twitter account, beesh, i don't know of anyone who is interested in what i'm doing every 5 minutes, except for my mother and that's enough for me NOT to have a twitter account.
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www.walkms.org
do it for a fellow ho!
Submitted by fuzzyslippers on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 11:20am.
He is so fug.
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I'd like to say that he looks like he's got Down's Syndrome in this picture, but that would be an insult to the people who really are afflicted with it.
Xxy..Make a few extra boot moves and catch up on those ass taxes. You're missed :)
MC, hope you're getting a breather now and then. Know you're busier than a one armed paper hanger these days.
xoxo
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Are You A Goddess? If so...
What exactly is a lame fish?
Spineless jellyfish
i.e., someone that doesn't have a "backbone".. meaning they cant stand up for themselves.. and the "jellyfish" part means they let people walk all over them and they are a really soft person
Is it just me or is he starting to pudge out a'la Kevin Federline?
Keep up the humor, Michael. You're my best therapy. The chemo is going well, thanks to you.
I'm sorry for him that his eyes are so far apart. After that he's exhausted my sympathy.
He is so fug.