Keanu Just Wants To Hear The Words: "You Are NOT The Father"
A few months ago, 46-year-old Karen Sala of Barrie, Ontario filed papers in a court claiming that Keanu Reeves fathered at least one of her four kids who are all now in their 20s. Karen asked the court to order Keanu to pay her loony ass $150,000 a month for child support Yes, CRAZY is a hell of a motherfucking drug.
I hadn't heard much from Karen since May, so I figured she got lost on the way to the crackhouse or she was busy writing love letters to murderers on death row (she seems like the type). Well, Karen is baaaaaaack and she's ready for the truth to be revealed! Karen told The Spec.com that she's happier than a methhead at Wino's house, because Keanu has agreed to submit his DNA for testing. Karen said,
Yeah, a personal journey to KeanuIsNotTheFatherVille - Population: Maury and YOU.
Keanu's publicist once again said that he claims he has never ever met Karen Sala, but wants to shut the door on the crazy, so he's willing to take the test to clear his name.
I'm sure if Keanu needs helping extracting the DNA from his peen hole, some of you whores out there will be willing to help him out in the name of JUSTICE. Just make sure you take a Terrence Howard-approved baby wipe to Keanu beforehand, unless you like butter on your sausage.
If Keanu turns out to be the father, I will adopt an Axolotl Salamander and name it Karen Reeves.
And how much do you want to make a bet that when it's revealed that Keanu didn't drop one in Karen, she will start claiming that she's the true mother of Blanket Jackson. Claire Cruise better sharpen her shank, because Karen is totally going to pull that shit.
oh god this picture! i'm sorry but keanu looks like a crazy asian hobo!
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"Honey, i am more man than you'll ever be and more woman than you'll ever get"
Carwash 1976
This senario should be used to educate teenagers about the importance of contraception. Consequence being crazy fuckers stalking you twenty years later. Some guys will stick it in anything but Kenoo looks too fussy and anal to do this chick.
her name was Jen she killed herself driving fucked up home from Marilyn Mansons house all waisted after an all nighter
xoxox
The war isn't working.
this wouldnt be his first ..that dead bitch lost one of his cuz she was a junkie,.
xoxox
The war isn't working.
and this is why are justice system is a joke...
ANYONE who makes ANY TYPE of false claim should face jail time AND a hefty fine.
that is the only way to make it stop.
by the by, miss loony tune...spousal support is for post marriage.
Submitted by blueangel on Thu, 09/03/2009 - 7:55pm.
Why didn't she claim this at the time the kids were born? These kids are now adults living on their own. Isn't there a statute of limitations on child support claims? Also, why is she claiming spousal support? Did he marry her? If so, he must be perpetually stoned!
All great Qs. And why spousal support only from Nov. 2006? Even if there's any truth to her claims, she has way over-played her hand. One possibility is there's enough truth to her claims that she hopes Keanu will buy her off? Maybe she'd go away forever if K paid for her molectomy?
Why didn't she claim this at the time the kids were born? These kids are now adults living on their own. Isn't there a statute of limitations on child support claims? Also, why is she claiming spousal support? Did he marry her? If so, he must be perpetually stoned!
** Forms line to help Keanu get justice! I could never figure which team he plays for, but again, I am willing to find out.
He's so asexual, imo.
She looks like the wicked witch of the west.
damn...keanu tapped that?
http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0006718/
keanu is my kind of dirty, but i'd like to believe he wouldn't stick his peen in this thing...
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she was clumsy, stupid and mean, but I wouldn't wish that death on a opossum...
if this is true he would have what? 2 or 3 kids now?
that said, the photo (of keanu) is a fucking riot!
___________________
"Honey, i am more man than you'll ever be and more woman than you'll ever get"
Carwash 1976
I can't even imagine Keanu having sex...
I know! I know!
She looks like Viggo in a wig.
I hate it when these crazy bitches mess with my man! >:(
TEAM KEANU!
Submitted by Sluttsville on Thu, 09/03/2009 - 10:32am.
@snowy & Raul....LOL, I just logged in and the MOLE is the 1st thing I see. SJP's mole has moved to Canada, it must be on the run.
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Nah, it'll never get across the border...wait...
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2 septembre, 1989 ♥♥♥
Cinq Cent Milles Miles
My friend recommended me a very interesting place
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My friend recommended me a very interesting place
________ S e e k R i c h. C O M_________ .It is the best dating club for seeking the rich singles, beauties and even hot celebs..what's the most important is:you dont have to be a millionaire.but you can meet one. I think everyone need to meet some miracle after all the terrible stuff in the news and the economy .______TTTTTTTT_____
Keanu is either a) perpetually fucking stoned or b)has the IQ of a fucking golf ball. Personally I'm going with A and saying he has the IQ of a say a really stupid dog.
kitten 666 she looks like a manson follower ! poor keanu ..... ( i don't think he would touch that ! ) next she will acuse brad pitt .... LOL
Lord! What did this woman look like back then? I hope better.
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"Crocs: They are to your eyes what second-hand smoke is to your lungs."
I'm more concerned with the fact that Keanu has seriously lost the hot.
*wipes single tear*
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Douchechill!
*********************************I recommend you a great millionaire
dating site___________________S e e k R i c h . C O M___________It
is said Charlie Sheen found his love last year on that site.Just do
it as soon as possible!GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
*********************************I recommend you a great millionaire
dating site___________________S e e k R i c h . C O M___________It
is said Charlie Sheen found his love last year on that site.Just do
it as soon as possible!GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
*********************************I recommend you a great millionaire
dating site___________________S e e k R i c h . C O M___________It
is said Charlie Sheen found his love last year on that site.Just do
it as soon as possible!GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG
It's said that more and more celebs and rich singles have profiles and their sexy photos on ~~~~~~_____WealthySeeker.COM____~~~~~~The best dating club for seeking the rich singles, sexy beauties and even hot celebs..~~~~~~~~~~~
Poor Keanu. What a nightmare psycho obnoxious fun-killing nutjob. LEAVE KEANU ALOOOOONE!
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ASUUU MADREEE!!!!!
She's got the crazy eyes, which totally mean Keanu nailed her like a 2x4. You know he likes the dirty/crazy.
Is that a Lebrea piercing she has or a sore??
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Raul!!!! *tears* LMAO so hard!!!
Actually, I wouldn't be surprised if he slept with her back in the day. Yes, she has crazy eyes. But with her blond hair, baby blues and a pretty decent nose, I think she would have looked pretty 20+ years ago.
Homegirl probably smells like Pantene, cocoa butter and three kinds of Victoria's Secret body spray...
Damn....Debbie Rowe had Keaanooooo's baby too?
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Cock-a-doodle-do, any cock will do!
@snowy & Raul....LOL, I just logged in and the MOLE is the 1st thing I see. SJP's mole has moved to Canada, it must be on the run.
I wonder if he really had sex with her & that is why he is agreeing to the test...Weird...I am kind of torn. If he didnt have sex with her why bother? Let the crazy be crazy & blow her off.
OMG Raul LMAO stop it! ahahaha
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Kara DioYOUKILLEDPAULA! SCRAGS BITCHES! MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
GAWD DAMN MK! Can we get a new post? Hair is starting to grow out that mole!
Is that a spot on her chin?
Where is Sluttz! Call off the dawgz! We found the MOLE! The Missing Mole has been located!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
Kara DioYOUKILLEDPAULA! SCRAGS BITCHES! MK
"Wudnt nuthin strage bout yo daddy!" Al Sharpton
Submitted by Raul Duke on Thu, 09/03/2009 - 9:50am.
Somehow a trip up her Love Canal does not strike me as an Excellent Adventure.
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BWAHAHAHAHAH! Classic Raul!!!!
Well, SJP's mole has been located. It's on this crazy's chin. You know she got that shit from ebay. It's probably what whispered in her ear about Keanu being the father.
Is that SJP in the picure next to Keanu? her mole moved! It's ALIIIIIVE!
3 million a month ? how many timbits is she looking at buying ?
as hard as i try I just can't seem to care.
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'fuck you guys. i'm goin' home.'
I wonder inwhich dating site they met...
Coma Caca!!
Girl's got crazy Charlie Manson disciple look in her eyes.
Submitted by Hekki on Thu, 09/03/2009 - 10:02am.
OMG, I love Robin Byrd...I always make my friends watch it when it comes on late night...hahahahaha. She is such a crackhead. But those 70s/80s strippers are amaaaaaaaaaaaaazing!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Rock me momma like the wind and the rain, Rock me momma like a southbound train.
What happens if just one of the 4 kids is Keanu's? Mums and that kid get all the perks, and the other 3 kids remain on the dole? That's a recipe for lasting family harmony.
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C'est complètement faux, je n'ai jamais fait ça ... mais je ne juge pas celles qui l'ont fait.
It's said that more and more celebs and rich singles have profiles and their sexy photos on ~~~~~~_____WealthySeeker.COM____~~~~~~The best dating club for seeking the rich singles, sexy beauties and even hot celebs..~~~~~~~~~~~
So, is it safe to conclude Keanu doing the DNA thing is an admission the he did in fact have fucky times with her?
And, perhaps, he could very well be a father to one or more of these chirruns?
I wanna see a photo of crazy lady from 20 or so years ago and judge for myself if she was worth the secksay times for Keanu.
I am not a huge Keanu fan anyway, I am curious as to why he is actually giving some jizz up for these tests if he and his people have denied it all along.
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I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
I hope Keanu sues this insane bitch for defamation and gets everything she owns, including the kleenex boxes she wears on her feet and the tin foil hat she wears to block out the alien voices in her head coming from outer space.
Only in the name of justice would I ask him to shave, shower, and get shined.
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"How can I think I'm standing strong?
Yet feel the air beneath my feet?
How can happiness feel so wrong?
How can misery be so sweet?"
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