Dancing With The Has-Beens: Where The Wild Things Aren't!
Last night's premiere of Dancing with the Sores was filled with your basic shit like: fake smiles, clenched nalgas, whack toupees (nod to Donny Osmond), meth mugs (nod to Aaron Carter) and limp wrists (nod to Mark Dacascos). That's until my arch rival CHERYL BURKE and her partner former house majority leader Tom DeLay took to the dancefloor. This performance should be used by the Jigsaw Killer to slowly torture his victims. Seriously, when it was done, my ass was bleeding and my hand was reaching for the phone to call 911.
The hilarious embarrassed look on Mop Head's face wasn't even enough to help me shake the image of Tom DeLay thrusting his booty hole, mugging to Bruno and popping that crotch. And the fact that Mop Head was thrusting right next to him made it all the more terrifying. How did this get past the FCC?! I'd rather be attacked by a million of Janet Jackson's pierced nipples then have to see that shit again.
Okay, okay, I'll admit that I want Mop Head and Tom DeLay to win so I can get some satisfaction out of seeing her dry up inside when he humps on her during the Samba.
AND I'll also admit that Tom DeLay really did bring the sex thanks to his "t-shirt tucked into his sweatpants" look. That'll do it.
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I'll bet his wife, mistress and girlfriend all enjoyed watching it..
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Delay's mincing behavior in some of the behind the scenes footage, was totally offensive; no shock coming from a republican whose idea of "softing up" is acting stereotypically feminine, like Jack McFarland on estrogen.
I really wanted Bruno to get up and bitch slap him.
Aaron Carter was a complete surprise. He did pretty good-he's tops right now. I suspect he's off the drugs at the present time. But I hate reality shows-its time for them to GO. Only reason to keep watching--great seeing the Backstreet Boys there. I can enjoy seeing Nick Carter anytime!
Submitted by Sensimina on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 11:49am.
I can't wait for Dancing With the Stars and American Idol to end, so I never have to lose another brain cell hearing about that shit.
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Sorry to disappoint you, but when they end, there will just be more shyt shows to take their place. I don't think they've quite scraped the bottom of the barrel yet.
Video taken down by You Tube.
Jerks.
I can't believe they have that dog fucker on DWTS so soon after he got out of jail!!!
Haha Video removed by the YouTube TOS monster again.
Michael Irvin is a sexy ass chocobear. Still, after all these years.
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"The Count on Sesame Street is scarier and more captivating than those preening whack vamps from Twilight." DListed user Master Blaster 6/09/09 (So true!)
Follow me on Twitter @t_rex_arms
Wow, did they always use that recycled Matrix stop motion shit as a way to introduce the contestants? At least Tom Delay got that one down, that was an epic jump..all of a sudden I am drawn to watching this season, coming from someone who has never given this mess of a show the time of day.
I really don't want to waste 6:23 minutes of my life on this vid, So I'll talk your word for it MK.
How did Aaron Carter do? I remember taking my daughter (7 years ago) to one of his concerts. The boy could dance then, and still sing (live, no lip synching) and not even be out of breath. Is he out of shape now?
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
This pains me to say it, but for as much as I deplore Tom DeLay, he was 100x better than Chuck Lidell. I don't watch the show, but my father-in-law called and told us to change the channel last night to watch DWTS because Lidell was such a trainwreck.
Yeah, I watched this mess last night and I'm not afraid to admit it. It was mildly amusing. Poor Aaron Carter - used to be so adorable. Now he's suffering from a bad case of methface. At least I got to see the remaining members of BSB cheer him on. That was sweet.
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"The Count on Sesame Street is scarier and more captivating than those preening whack vamps from Twilight." DListed user Master Blaster 6/09/09 (So true!)
Follow me on Twitter @t_rex_arms
Mophead must have pissed someone big time in order for to get paired with Delay. She used to get the best partners. What happened to Macy Gray? Did she dance?
Submitted by Raul Duke on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 12:02pm.
Submitted by suckandfuck on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 11:53am.
Submitted by Raul Duke on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 11:51am.
used part.
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Go on....
This guy once asked me how I liked that "used pussy" when I started bangin' his ex and I told him "it's pretty good once you git passed the used part".
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Thats the funniest sh*t I heard all day!!!!
Resistance is Futile!
Submitted by Raul Duke on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 12:02pm.
Submitted by suckandfuck on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 11:53am.
Submitted by Raul Duke on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 11:51am.
used part.
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Go on....
This guy once asked me how I liked that " used pussy " when I started bangin' his ex and I told him "it's pretty good once you git passed the used part".
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FUCK!!! I wish I would have thought of this shit!!! BWAwahahahahahaha*cough*aaaa*cough*
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KEEP FUCKIN THAT CHICKEN!
Submitted by suckandfuck on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 11:53am.
Submitted by Raul Duke on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 11:51am.
used part.
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Go on....
This guy once asked me how I liked that " used pussy " when I started bangin' his ex and I told him "it's pretty good once you git passed the used part".
I just lost 10 minutes of my life watching this keebler elf try to shuffle his way across the floor. I still can't understand why people actually watch this show, BJ and the Bear had better production value..
I only sat through this fuckery to see Micheal Irvin. He was ok, rather cocky and certainly no Emmitt Smith.
maybe this was already mentioned, but did anybody else wonder why Jermaine Jackson was sitting next to Marie Osmond? LaToya, Jermaine is stepping on your famewhore territory, girl.
Not terrible. "Vote with the republicans party with the democrats" has that been the secret moto since Clinton?
Submitted by gia
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Embarrasing and repulsive are the best words to descibe that shit. Everything about him is disgusting.
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Chris Brown needs to like, wow, take that stupid ass bow tie and shove it down his throat. It's like, wow. WOW. --MK 8/31/09
Submitted by Raul Duke on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 11:51am.
used part.
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Go on....
I think Cheryl Burke's pussy is more like the vagina of a cow in labor...somehow I can see Raul Duke and a pair of rubber gloves shoulder-deep in that shit. ;)
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http://wethinkyoushould.blogspot.com/
http://bleedingthecorgan.blogspot.com
http://myspace.com/rainbowsrule
Frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.
Too funny...that Delay dude looked like he had a depends on under those sweatpants.
I am so in the floor laughing over MK's remarks.
Submitted by suckandfuck on Tue, 09/22/2009 - 11:47am.
Does anyone else think Cheryl Burke's moppy haired pussy is REALLLLLLLY tight?
Who cares? Raul has enough dick to git passed the used part.
I couldn't get through 30 seconds of this shit...I hate Tom DeLay.
But I don't watch DWTS, so...no harm, no foul.
I can't wait for Dancing With the Stars and American Idol to end, so I never have to lose another brain cell hearing about that shit. Every week I'm trying to enjoy my tabloids about REAL CELEBRITIES and the stupid shit they're up to, and there's always like a ten-page special on DWTS or AI. It's getting so fucking old.
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http://wethinkyoushould.blogspot.com/
http://bleedingthecorgan.blogspot.com
http://myspace.com/rainbowsrule
Frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.
what a couple of phony ass douchebags.
I had to shut this off. it was making me
want to hurl.
Why is this shit even on TV?
Does anyone else think Cheryl Burke's moppy haired pussy is REALLLLLLLY tight?
Wow. I felt embarrassed for ole Tommy-boy. Especially with the t-shirt tucked in the sweatpants... WTF, what a douchenozzle.
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KEEP FUCKIN THAT CHICKEN!
Embarrassing & repulsive...I actually feel an itty bitty bit sorry for Mop Head.
Sociopath drunk mofo!! This man makes me SICK to my stomach.
Do you know what the little black specks in chickenshit are? They're shit too, just sayin'.
Am- I don't have it either!! Is it something we can install?
Tom DeLay is a fucking piece of shit.
Team Donny!
As for DeLay, One Bad Apple don't spoil the whole bunch girl.
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I get by with a little help from my friends,
Yes I get by with a little help from my friends,
With a little help from my Dlisted friends.
I don't have FlashPlayer on my Blackberry!
*throws BB across the room*
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Now, now, now, now Kim. I am a ten. I probably could go down to a size eight, but I don't feel like it. Guess why. Because I'm fuckin' hungry!!!
I don't watch this show.
In fact, even the TV commercials for it piss me off.
What's with this weird Matrix-like freeze frame of the participants in the intro?
The commercial has one bitch doing a split, looks like she is packin' large.
Raul would let Mop Head polish his shalale.
Oh how whimsical and wacky! A fucking sociopathic
criminal on DWTS! Yeah, aw. He's a real
person, JUST LIKE US!
"Tom DeLay" and "crotch" should never be used in the same sentence. Prepare for the end times.
It is obvious that someone is pretending to be Tom DeLay just like in The Naked Gun 2 1/2 when Dr. Albert S. Meinheimer was kidnapped and replaced by an impostor. Yes, that is exactly what happened with Tom DeLay.
Where's Maksim? I'm looking to jerk it at my desk in the hopes of collecting sweet unemployment.
Oh dear God.
Snowy is my goddess!!!!!!!!!
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"So? I'm intellectual and stuff."
"You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue, and stuff."
I literally got a stomach ache right as I was watching that. Must have been a coincidence.