The CDC's Newest It Couple
While some of you slut whores were doing ho shit over the weekend, a brand new type of venereal disease was birthed in Hollywood when Balthazar Getty and Blohan dry fucked each other at a club. Yeah, I think your genitals grew a puss-filled wart just from thinking about it. See you at the free clinic.
People says that Blohan showed up to West Hollywood club Voyeur with the still married Balthazar at her side. Some source said the two snuck in through the club's backdoor (hopefully, the backdoor was covered with a dental dam) and only stayed for 30-minutes. During that time, they were "all over each other" at a table in the front room.
Okay, before you start farting about how Blohan is licking up Sienna Miller's sloppy seconds, think about it for a minute. Sienna Miller is a cock connoisseur, so Blohan figured Balthazar must give good dick. And for her big return to the peen, Blohan wanted to make sure she got on a dick that would make her pork loaf simmer.
And if you see a weepy dick and tortured vagina hitchhiking along the highway, they belong to Balthazar and Blohan. They're trying to get away again. Put on your masks and wave to them from afar.
These two need to be on quarantine.
that scared me enough too sleep with the lights on tonight!
Thanks Angel!!!!
Jermajesty's Secret Service
*snaps* for Vern and idiots drive me loco:)
♥ Threadkilla!
"Dear old people who run the world:
My generation would like to break up with you" ~ Jason Chan.
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wow i have to say she really looks like a full blown drug addict there... she was hiding it ok before,, i mean she was rexic and stuff but now she has the sunken eyes and the bloody looking lower lid lines... shes finally goin down
xoxox
The war isn't working.
If Mrs. Getty is putting up with his crap, she deserves what she's getting. I always had the cynical suspicion that she endured his philandering to increase the duration of their marriage before divorce (increasing her right to spousal support). Maybe there's a pre-nup with some "years of service" clause?
Gee...I guess this is her dyke-free week.
Perfect pair. Both look like a couple of 60 year old survivalists
she needs to start drinking tons of water and getting more than 20 minutes of sleep each night...
IT'S NOT HER FAULT, GUISE! SHE WAS TOTALLY HIGH ON THE DRUGS SHE INVOLUNTARILY TOOK.
♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣♣
Now we are the crow which contemplated the silence...
ahem:
worthless gigalo
stupid, spoiled coke-addled whore
bred new strain of herp
limp, tiny penis
talentless old looking whore
contribute nothing
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
Daniel Craig looks like he'd angry sex you into a coma!--astute observation by ISprainedMyUvula
I thought that was from her court appearance. Is she about to cry or still high or super hungover or something? Her eyes are awfully glazed over.
What's up with that ridiculous face Lindsey is making? I want to slap her. In fact, I saw another post full of pics of her court appearance and ALL of her facial expressions were disrespectful. She doesn't know how easy she has it. Am I a bad person for wishing she had gone to jail? This girl just seems like she thrives on being a bitch.
Dear Lord
She is turning into Judy Garland (without the talent) before our very eyes!
Blohan has so many disaeses that they've mutated into a virulent strain of "I'll do anyone with blow and love it!"
Didn't she sleep with Jude Law before and was bragging about it? I think what she really wants is Sienna Miller, and she thinks the best way to get to Sienna is by sleeping with her ex's.
"Free Clinic Shit" tag
i don't know why, but that caught me just hilarious!!
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"The shadow's fall and spread their
mystique charms in the hush of night,
while you're in my arms.
I feel your lips, so warm and tender.
My one and only love."
"sloppy seconds"
Yeah! A Sean Avery reference!
Yeah, it figures. I wondered what sort of disgusting desperate whore would be willing to have sex with this guy after he played "hide the sausage" with Sluttienna. And now we know.
Snow on Bandana
makes the meth faced whores so sad
they can't be in love.
Jermajesty's Secret Service
Well this shitfest couple actually makes sense. In a McCracky way.
LOL@Stoney!
Balthazar Getty
loves to put his penis in
skinny blonde cokeheads
♥ Threadkilla!
"Dear old people who run the world:
My generation would like to break up with you" ~ Jason Chan.
@Stoney: That was bootiful! *sniff*
==================
Bottom-feeder.
Haiku time!
Lilo needs a pipe
That is not caked with old crack
From which she can smoke
_____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Of course you know I love ALL of your poems...but Few Words almost haiku really brought a tear to my eye *dabs tear*
She needs a tat
that says
Open for Business
♥ Threadkilla!
"Dear old people who run the world:
My generation would like to break up with you" ~ Jason Chan.
so...lilo back on the snausage?
_____________________________________________
A new kitty lapping up milk trumps old pussy coughing up hair balls any day.
She needs a tat
that says
Open for Business
LOL @ snowetry!!! Why, thank you, Sluttsville, fellow poet and tortured soul. Although I must applaud jack's little couplets for their sheer simplicity deftly woven with filaments of smart-assery.
=======================================
Bottom-feeder.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Blohan is a coked out whore
that digs dicks or clams
even if they are used
Why can't all poetry be limericks?
I liked reedin', ritin' and stuff, but always dreaded ev'ry year when we be doin' the poetry. I liked reading it, but I could never grasp "Iambic Pantameter" and all that jazz. The only thing I remember is that you can sing Emily Dickinson to the tune of "Yellow Rose of Texas". (I heard a fly buzz when I died...)
*************************************************
Torn between two lovers, feelin' like a fool
Lovin' both of you is breakin' all the rules...
O - how lovely! We have a little Poet's Corner!
DListed IS fancy today, innit? :D
♥ Threadkilla!
"Dear old people who run the world:
My generation would like to break up with you" ~ Jason Chan.
Plecostomus, your avie skill is rivaled by your poetry skill. It was snowetry.
It only took me 85 years and 10 million dollars to graduate, too.
_____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Here's mine you fuckers:
Roses are red, violets are blue...
if he bought me a coke, I'd fuck him too.
*takes bow*
*opens beer*
_____________________________________________
And your friend.... your friend tried to make it with that cow... I wanna party with you cowboy.
Yep! Ah wuz an EnGlish majer, yall!
(and communications, double)
_____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
*Golf-claps Stoney, Sluttsville, and angel_i*
*Clears throat*
And now, my contribution to the Snowy Poetry Hour:
A DListed ho, once, was snowy
Snarking D-list celebrities daily
Met Brett Michaels one day
And got star-struck, oy vey!
So now poor little snowy's gone batty.
==========================================
Bottom-feeder.
stoney: you was and Englush majer to?
no wonder your poems are so well written!
****************************
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
Stoney...excellent.
Bravo angel-i. That was fabalicious!
There once was a snowy from Midtown
Who met Brett Michaels, an assclown
But he bought her a coke
snowy fell in love with the bloke
Now she points & calls us a joke.
There once was a snowy from Nantuckit,
Who saw a doo-rag and decided to fuck it,
But 'fore she could make woopie,
She needed tits that weren't droopy,
So she bought herself bolt-ons to please 'im.
_____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
My whole freshman year was the Greeks and Shakepeare. Then sophomore was Chaucer and Beowulf and other super old fucks, Junior and Senior year was 17th-19th century Brit Lit. Then I majored in that crap in college along with communications. I'm like, such a good communicator and shit. I read real good too.
_____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Stoney, every year we had to read Willie S.
Freshmen = Romeo and Juliet
Sophomore = Julius Ceasar
Junior = MacBeth
Senior = Hamlet
College = King Lear and Richard III
(why would a History major take British Lit as an elective? What a loozer)
*************************************************
Torn between two lovers, feelin' like a fool
Lovin' both of you is breakin' all the rules...
ahahahahhahaha angel that's Ho~etry, not poetry!
****************************
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
There was a girl named snowy, who lived in Nantucket
She had only a laptop, a TV and a bucket
But then she met Brett which
Made her his bottom bitch
And now she also has titties the size of Nantucket.
MOVE OVER, SHAKESPEARE!
LWTHFT
♥ Threadkilla!
"Dear old people who run the world:
My generation would like to break up with you" ~ Jason Chan.
Julius Caeser
_____________________________________________
And your friend.... your friend tried to make it with that cow... I wanna party with you cowboy.
I did that shit freshman year, back in 1832.
_____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 10/19/2009 - 11:51am.
angel, they are filming The Celeb Apprentice Downstairs
**************************************
Well...what are Brett, Darryl, and Sinbad doing there? Are they serving lunch to the celebs?
ok Shakespeare right?
_____________________________________________
"Let s/he who is without sin, cast the first Stoney."
Submitted by loozer on Mon, 10/19/2009 - 11:30am.
'Tis a common proof,
That lowliness is young ambition's ladder,
Whereto the climber-upward turns his face;
But when he once attains the upmost round,
He then unto the ladder turns his back,
Looks in the clouds, scorning the base degrees
By which he did ascend.
Et tu Snowy?
********************************
loozer, you can't be quotin' fancy talk like that; for gosh sakes it's snowy and Brett. It should be something like...
There was a girl named snowy, who lived in Nantucket.