Friday, October 30th 2009

Hot Slut Of The Day!

Tank Jones - An Anchorage private investigator who is now working full-time as Levi Johnston's hand-holder/bodyguard/manager. First of all, his name is Tank Jones. That's some A-Team shit. Second of all, he's also Levi's dick's official spokesperson, because he's constantly keeping us updated on if the peen will show itself or not in Playgirl. Third of all, he loves alligator shoes so much that he poses next to them in pictures.

Image source

Posted by: Michael K


MrPossumsMama's picture

This guy needs his own reality show!!

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huangzhixian97's picture

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Neverevenknewhim's picture

I like him.

Tristram's picture

Submitted by Disraeli_Ears on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 9:15am.

"The Libertine" was good but depressing: you see this brilliant guy with a loving wife and kids, wealth, and position, throw it all away on booze and syphilis. Also great performances by Samantha Morton and Rosamund Pike (grrrr).

ONT: Levi: it's casual Friday.

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Bring on the Night

Disraeli_Ears's picture

Submitted by Tristram on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 9:08am.

LOL...I'll have to look that one up...nothing better than sex and scandal. ;) And I need to put "The Libertine" on my Netflix list; I never got to see it.

=================================================
And the National Rifle Association says that, "Guns don't kill people, people do,” but I think the gun helps, you know?

Tristram's picture

Submitted by Disraeli_Ears on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:58am.

hahaha. I meant I was trying to be intellectual.... It's "So Idle a Rogue," by Jeremy Lamb, about John Wilmot, 2d Earl of Rochester. Lots of drink, bisexual sexay scandal, poetry, politics.... He's the subject of the flick "The Libertine" with Johnny Depp.

ONT: Levi's gonna need to skin some beavers to keep Tank on retainer.

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Bring on the Night

Disraeli_Ears's picture

Submitted by Tristram on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:50am.

Oh? And what book is this? Hmmm...if Jessica would like it....could it be "A Toddler's Guide to Gettysburg"? lol

ONT: I think Tank (at least in this picture) looks like the unmelted version of Papa Joe Jackson.

=================================================
And the National Rifle Association says that, "Guns don't kill people, people do,” but I think the gun helps, you know?

Tristram's picture

Submitted by Disraeli_Ears on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:40am.

Mornin'! (My time.) I went with something seasonal--I'll change back tamarrah.

Hey, I have a cool history book to recommend, if you're innerested. (Jessica S would approve.)

ONT: Go Gators!
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Bring on the Night

Disraeli_Ears's picture

Submitted by Tristram on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:36am.

hahaha. Nice! Should be a fun Friday.

----------------

Good morning, Tristram...I see you changed your avvie...I liked your wolf!

No dressing up for me...one of the guys in the admin room is dressed up like "Chuck Norris," but I told him he looked like Levi Johnston! He laughed.

=================================================
And the National Rifle Association says that, "Guns don't kill people, people do,” but I think the gun helps, you know?

Tristram's picture

Submitted by RecessVillain on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:31am.
Things are fine. I wasnt the only person to dress up at the office today.

hahaha. Nice! Should be a fun Friday.

ONT: I just got Centaurious's comment about his big shoes. I think everything about Tank is big, including his appetite.

-----------------
Bring on the Night

Disraeli_Ears's picture

Submitted by mike on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:34am.

Tank, if Sarah goes after Levi, don't hold back. I cannot emphasize that enough - do not hold back.
---------------

LOL! So true!

=================================================
And the National Rifle Association says that, "Guns don't kill people, people do,” but I think the gun helps, you know?

mike's picture

Tank, if Sarah goes after Levi, don't hold back. I cannot emphasize that enough - do not hold back.

RecessVillain's picture

Submitted by Tristram on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:09am.
Submitted by RecessVillain on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:06am.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Things are fine. I wasnt the only person to dress up at the office today. whoo-hoo!!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Publicity is one hellova drug."
-RecessVillain

Centaurious's picture

The shoes are a little obvious, Tank.

Why don't you just hum a few bars of "Smell Yo Dick?"

"I never should have switched from scotch to martinis.."

Centaurious's picture

@tristram:hahahaha. Good one. No one gets to the Johnston without going through Tank.
___________________________

Ha! I heard no one gets to the Johnston without going through stank...

"I never should have switched from scotch to martinis.."

Tristram's picture

Submitted by Centaurious on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:11am.
So he's a dick dick.

hahahaha. Good one. No one gets to the Johnston without going through Tank.

-----------------
Bring on the Night

iHeartHaters's picture

Oh man that little Levi shit actually needs a bodyguard?? I guess to save him from getting the crap beat out of him lol Too bad Tank can't double as a urologist and STERILIZE that kid. No more sperm from that fucktard!

(¯`'•.¸(¯`'•.¸♥¸.•'´¯)¸.•'´¯)

2007~It was a truly magical time in Shitneyland.

"Sam put drugs in Britney's biscuits"

Centaurious's picture

So he's a dick dick.

"I never should have switched from scotch to martinis.."

Tristram's picture

Submitted by RecessVillain on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 8:06am.

Hey Recess. How are things?

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Bring on the Night

RecessVillain's picture

WTF with "DudeMall"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Publicity is one hellova drug."
-RecessVillain

RecessVillain's picture

Submitted by Tristram on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 7:49am.
I bet "Tank" is short for "Reginald."

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Bwahahaha. That's so funny because it's true.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"Publicity is one hellova drug."
-RecessVillain

Katt's picture

....The Fuck? There's no way his mama really named him "TANK". It does fit the guy tho, I must say.
Tank is way too badass to be hanging around Levi Johnston. Hell, he probably personally wrestled and killed that alligator to get those shoes...you don't fuck with TANK.
**********
"All of us are lying in the gutter but some of us are looking up at the stars."-Oscar Wilde

freebird's picture

Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 7:54am.

Submitted by freebird on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 7:50am.
LOL ESE! LEAVE A MESSAGE!

only if ya set it to vibrate!HEEHEEHEE!
***
BWAHAH! 0_o Follow my twat tweets on twitter!!!!

EveryStrangersEyes's picture

Submitted by freebird on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 7:50am.
LOL ESE! LEAVE A MESSAGE!

only if ya set it to vibrate!HEEHEEHEE!

-----------------------------
"Got up next morning and I grabbed that gun,
took a shot of cocaine and away I run,
made a good run but i run too slow,
they overtook me down in Juarez, Mexico."

Plecostomus's picture

SO this is Tank. He looks like Michael Clarke Duncan as Kingpin from Daredevil, give or take a couple hundred pizzas and Cokes.

=====================================
Bottom-feeder.

freebird's picture

LOL ESE! LEAVE A MESSAGE!

Tristram's picture

I bet "Tank" is short for "Reginald."

-----------------
Bring on the Night

Yowsa, looks like William Perry "The Refrigerator" football player. Isn't that him?

snowpiece's picture

Tank! Have you seen the peen? Howz about you show us your peen now that you are HSOTD?!?!
****************************
"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown

EveryStrangersEyes's picture

Submitted by freebird on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 7:19am.
I need an official vagina spokesperson. I'm tired of people talking directly to my vagina.

i think that's a great idea... mainly because i'm tired of being thrown right to voicemail!LOL!

-----------------------------
"Got up next morning and I grabbed that gun,
took a shot of cocaine and away I run,
made a good run but i run too slow,
they overtook me down in Juarez, Mexico."

TexnDoc's picture

Well, this clears up a lot of questions.

Submitted by freebird on Fri, 10/30/2009 - 7:19am.
I need an official vagina spokesperson. I'm tired of people talking directly to my vagina.
==============================================
I think I might be able to help you out there Freebird.

Campbell2009's picture

Welcome to Shopping →→→ http://www.dudemalls.com

Best quality, Best reputation , Best services

With our advanced manufacturing, production lines and well-organized sales networks, we can provide many products, such as apparel, shoes, caps, handbags, etc.
Our goal is "the best quality, best reputation and best services". Your satisfaction is our main pursue. You can find the best products from us, meeting your different needs.

HOT SELL Product Brand is below:
Nike Air Jordan(1-25)/Jordan Six Ring/Jordan Fusion/Nike Shox/Air Max/AF1/Dunk: $32
Polo/Ed Hardy/Lacoste/Ca/A&F ……T-shirt:
Coach /Gucci/Lv/Ed Hardy/D&G/Fendi ……Handbag:$35
Christian Louboutin/Lv/Ed Hardy/Gucci/Coach/Lacoste/ Timbland……Shoe :$35
True Religion/Coogi/Evisu/Ed Hardy/Prada ……Jeans:$30
New era/Gucci/Ed hardy ……cap : $13
Okely/Coach/D&G/Fendi/Gucci/Armani ……sunglass : $15
Nike shoes: 32 $, True Religion jeans: 30 $, Ed Hardy, t-shirts: 12 $, NFL Jersey: 20 $, Boots UGG: 50 $

http://www.dudemalls.com/productlist.asp?id=s18 (JORDAN SHOES)

http://www.dudemalls.com/productlist.asp?id=s22 (ED HARDY)

http://www.dudemalls.com/productlist.asp?id=s69 (Handbag)

http://www.dudemalls.com/productlist.asp?id=s6 (TSHIRTS)

http://www.dudemalls.com/productlist.asp?id=s76 (Jacket)

http://www.dudemalls.com/productlist.asp?id=s77 (Hoody_m)

http://www.dudemalls.com/productlist.asp?id=s1 (NHL Jersey)

http://www.dudemalls.com/productlist.asp?id=s3 (NBA Jersey)

http://dudemalls.com/productlist.asp?id=n316 (Photoshop CS4)

freebird's picture

I need an official vagina spokesperson. I'm tired of people talking directly to my vagina.

Dr. Dick's picture

Levi, your fifteen minutes were up a long time ago.