Saturday, November 21st 2009

Seal Has A Last Name?!

Yes, Seal does have a last name, and his wife of four years Heidi Klum has officially taken it. Yesterday in Los Angeles, a commissioner (just think of Michael Chiklis) declared that Heidi Klum is officially Heidi Samuel. Yeah, Heidi Samuel doesn't make my Schnitzel tingle as much as Heidi Klum, but she's doing it for love. Love makes you do crazy things like wipe nostril diarrhea from your man's nose when he's sick and use his name on your drivers license. Go figure.

Heidi's rep would not say whether or not she plans to use her new last name professionally.

Not only does Seal have a last name, but he also has like fifty middle names. Dude's full name is Seal Henry Olusegun Olumide Adeola Samuel. If you don't have a middle name, send hate mail to Seal, because that ho hogged them all up for himself.

Source

Posted by: Michael K


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jh

GrumpyBear420's picture

he looks like beef jerky to me

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Sensimina's picture

Heidi has some true Gumbyface...bitch has a wonk eye and one of the most craziest nosejobs of all time. No one ever mentions her Michael Jackson-like nose. It's absolutely RIDICULOUS.

She does seem like a smart woman though. And you know she can be a total BITCH when she wants to be - she's German.

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Frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.

Mcatz's picture

Heidi will just always look like a black crow to me since I saw her Halloween costume lol

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We all searched for the ellusive last name of SEAL but i think it's impossible. For he has no name at all.

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Supertramp's picture

As long as they're happy that's all that matters.

i cannot figure out why in the hell this woman married him and had kids too. his name might be seal but he should probably change it to lizard. that face is scaley.
he may be a nice guy but damn- that face is just full-out fucked up. almost fubar.

you've just been violated!

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Crawford67's picture

The next time I want to make cookies I'll call Seal. He has enough grease on that forehead to cover a dozen pans.

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Not only does Seal have a last name, but he also has like fifty middle names. Dude's full name is Seal Henry Olusegun Olumide Adeola Samuel. If you don't have a middle name, send hate mail to Seal, because that ho hogged them all up for himself.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Priceless, LOL!

Seal and Heidi seem to have a happy marriage and strong family.

Good for them!

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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Niko's picture

@ happy face

Glad to help :)

------------------------
Auri sacra fames

happyface's picture

Niko, TITS-

Thanks for letting me know I haven't been taking crazy pills the whole time.

Niko's picture

Heidi is an uppity bitch. In the German version of her show she is so mean it beggars belief. Not to mention her intoleberal voice. Well back in the fatherland she has by now become the butt of every joke, has an impersonater who is close to Tina and has severly damaged her standing.

As for da holy family: I hope they are in love. But Seal seems to be seriously pussy whipped so Klum's taking his last name may be some sort of consolation. Sounds better too, because Klum in German sounds clumsy. Sort of.

------------------------
Auri sacra fames

coolforsale1204's picture

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happyface's picture

Submitted by TITS on Sat, 11/21/2009 - 10:30pm.
@happyface. Yes. Total uber cunt vibe (and not the good kind)

a little too self assured and full of herself for my liking.

no humanity.

-------------------------------------------------------

I have to find this interview I read in a mag w/ her once where she and the interviewer went to a restaurant where a newly employed waitor accidentally knocked over an expensive vase. When the restaurant owner/manager came by to look at the mess, Heidi Klum pointed at the obviously shamed waitor and said, "He did it!". She turned to the interviewer and said something like, "Well, I didn't want him to think we did it!" That solidified the bitch opinion.

TITS's picture

@happyface. Yes. Total uber cunt vibe (and not the good kind)

a little too self assured and full of herself for my liking.

no humanity.

.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
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happyface's picture

Does anyone else get a complete evil bitch vibe from Heidi? And no I'm not thinking of her supermodel status when I ask that. It's just that in every Project Runway and every interview I've ever seen/heard w/ her, she comes across as a complete uppity cunt. Just 'cause she married a man w/ a skin condition does not undo her cuntiness.
And I read some people think Seal seems like a nice guy? Well, does anyone remember how he threw a complete bitch-fit on camera for no good reason?

Seal seems like a jerk in these vids. No matter what you think of paparazzi. Nice guy? I don't see it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZCyp7BSva8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0rBEK8XyUp4

delirio's picture

Samuel? Like Michael Samuel, the character from La Femme Nikita

------
Submitted by Jill-The-Ripper on Sat, 11/21/2009 - 12:28pm.
Finally taking my ex hubby's last name after 5 years was the kiss of death for our marriage.
I should have remembered there was a reason I didn't take it from the start.
And of course I had to have all my info changed (driver's license etc) and pay $65 to take back my maiden name!
------

Over here (in Argentina) you just add your husband's surname to yours, for example "Heidi Klum de Samuel".

Tigerlilly's picture

Meh...

**********************************
Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...

kittymuffin's picture

Stop commenting on Seal's skin condition...grow the fuck up already

kittymuffin's picture

I love them, Heidi is soooo cool...best of luck to them

Seal is cool and they seem so happy together so even though Id like to sneer its hard to bitch about them...

"NOSOPD -Not our sort of person darling"

KittenKatinCanada's picture

Heidi Klum-Samuel is adorable and I love her on Project Runway. Seal seems devoted to her, and they appear very much in love. What a sweet family.

************************************************

"This is what we call the floating world . . .” (Ryoi, c.1661)

" . . . the world needs to be shut down. I mean it this time. SHUT IT DOWN". (MK, c.2009)

Centaurious's picture

Tank, horrified by the apathetic response to Levi's Playgirl pics, interviews a candidate for Levi's new Vivid Video, a remake of "Blow Out."

________________________________
"I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host."

MizRo's picture

I like this couple too: they seem to truly love and respect each other and have a wonderful sense of family and both have funny bones. They laugh and love together.

ploppsicle's picture

Apart from Seal of course :s

ploppsicle's picture

Good Nigerian names there!

Manimal5's picture

Congrats to them!

And were never 'gonna survive, unless we are a little crazy.

I survived and I'm a lot crazy, anyway my favorite Seal song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Fc67yQsPqQ

Golden's picture

Awww!

I love these two together! I wonder when they will post pics of their new baby girl?

david Letterman- Staff fucker's picture

I don't really know who the fuck he is, but she seems to be really craqzy about the dude, so he's got to be a decent guy. If they break up though, I will definitely take her to the broom closet or green room for a little fun!

She is a hot bitch, yes, she is!

Seal had some form of lupus when he was a child, that's why his face is scarred. A beautiful and loving couple!

TheBreakdown's picture

They're cute together and I approve their happiness.

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putas's picture

i have a sudden urge to go bobbing for french fries

paris herpes's picture

Seal has a sexy voice, but his face is all scarred. I think he was in a fire accident or something...they seem very happy together. *PUKE*

"When dick is rancid, you know as soon as you pull the fly down. Seriously, you can smell it right away. It's like a week-old grilled cheese sandwich lying on a hot subway seat in the middle of August."

shandi's picture

I like him. He seems like a genuinely nice guy who really loves his wife and kids. And I LOVE his voice.

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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK

zomay's picture

I hear Seal at the grocery store all the time. They have a Seal station piped in.

;)

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peaches80's picture

Submitted by xerquina on Sat, 11/21/2009 - 1:15pm.
Submitted by peaches80 on Sat, 11/21/2009 - 1:06pm.
yes peaches i waz talkin to you and i see you're just peachy.
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okay we cool !
muaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
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no idea !
http://www.flickr.com/photos/peaches2709/

xerquina's picture

Submitted by peaches80 on Sat, 11/21/2009 - 1:06pm.
yes peaches i waz talkin to you and i see you're just peachy.