Friday, November 27th 2009

The Butler Did It Again?

You might be wondering why Gerard Butler has a single bloody tear stuck in his eye. That's because his tortured eyeball was forced to stare at Kimbo Stewart's constipated bird face for hours at The Groucho Club in London last night. The Daily Mail says that Gerry had Thanksgiving dinner with Kimbo and Natalie Imbruglia (aka the "Torn" chick). They all left separately, but I'm sure they met up in a back alley somewhere and bumped titties under the moonlight.

It's not Gerry's period eye that I'm concerned about, it's his other eye. The eye on his dick. Gerry needs to get that shit checked out with an optometrist, if he actually got down with Kimbo. I mean, Kimbo?!

And since we're on the subject of Kimbo and it is the day after Thanksgiving, let's stare at her ex-boyfriend's (nsfl) turkey neck nuts again!

Posted by: Michael K


merryxiao15's picture

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James Haven's picture

Gerry gets more ass then a Proctologist. Just how does he do it? James Haven conjured up the nerve to ask this bloated bloke the question and here's Gerry's reply:

"James Haven all you have to do is pick an accent. Irish, Scottish, English and Australian have already been taken. Then skip showering and shaving for a few days. Get yourself a drug or alcohol addiction and then get your photo snapped with a wretchit whore in Hollywood that can't hold onto a man if she crazy glued her thighs. Now, if you can score Aniston you're in!"

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the brunette's ok ...is she a moss spice?

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the Blinding's picture

Submitted by Aunt Bea on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 10:10pm.
He's always sweaty looking, he can't act, and he has a big nose. What made Hollywood take a shine to this guy?

uh...his ass. hot, skanky, boozey bloke with a sexy accent--what else is there in life? Kim Stewart must be down with some ass-to-mouth ho shit if guys keep hanging out with her ugly ass. she's like the even more broke-down version of Paris Hilton--STD's included. could you imagine getting so drunk you black out and wake up to some skinny whore, with Rod Stewart's face, sucking on your limp dick?? I would get up and take a cab straight to Promises to dry the fuck out. now, that's ROCK BOTTOM.

Datura's picture

Natalie's coat is adorable. That's basically all I've gotten from this story because Gerard Butler is a big YAWN in my book.

*~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*~~~~~~~~~~~*
Masturbation is not a GD game of Clue, there is no reason to head to the broom closet with a rope and a lead pipe. --michelleb

He's always sweaty looking, he can't act, and he has a big nose. What made Hollywood take a shine to this guy?

parkerj's picture

He's fooling around with Kimberly Stewart? Does he have no standards?

How many diseases do you think this guy has had. Wasn't he hooking with Lindsay for a quick minute a while back?

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He's nothing more than a chubby skanky drunk. Kim Stewart is just a slut. I thought that Natalie married the lead singer of Silver Chair?

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ScarfnBarf's picture

Kimberly Stewart is over the pond because she finally took a hint Hollywood didn't want her. Plus Cisco is her ex-fiance. Jack Osborn is an ex-boyfriend. Tagline SKANK is right - when she was squeezed out of Alana's twat how could she be anything but?

salacious's picture

Butler is the new Crow / Farrel - the hot briton/aussie bad boy du jour. Hos probably get drunk every time they let him shoot a load in their mouths.

Love Natalie... I'm glad she got divorced. She's got a new album out, Mr. Fishticks co-wrote and produced some of the songs. Always liked her music, but she's too beautiful to be taken seriously as an artist. She's always been bigger outside the US.

TTFN

Sugaroo's picture

Rascal, I think he has alcohol issues. He parties WAY too much not to have.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
George W. Bush has decided to become a motivational speaker, thereby putting his money where his foot usually is.

TheBreakdown's picture

little_rascal:

He's Scottish so of course he's an alcoholic.

He was probably driving the car for Tiger.

And why bleach teeth that need to be straightened first?!

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little_rascal's picture

@ Sugaroo

He has that bloated face I find a real turn-off (maybe he's an alcoholic?), and his teeth need bleaching.

Sugaroo's picture

Can he even act?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
George W. Bush has decided to become a motivational speaker, thereby putting his money where his foot usually is.

TheBreakdown's picture

Sugaroo:

No I did not forget but I HAVE heard him speak and that is the slight 'tardation from which I speak.

And if that is the hottest export they have, they need to pack that shit up, ship it back OUT and try again!

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Disraeli_Ears's picture

He is a Scot...he also used to be a lot more attractive. See a crappy movie called "Dracula 2000" to see the "hot" version of him.

=================================================
And the National Rifle Association says that, "Guns don't kill people, people do,” but I think the gun helps, you know?

Sugaroo's picture

Breakdown, he IS fat, isn't he? Yep - 'Merican women fall for all of that but you forgot accents. We are total suckers for accents. I've never heard Butler speak, but I think I heard he's Scottish or something, right?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
George W. Bush has decided to become a motivational speaker, thereby putting his money where his foot usually is.

TheBreakdown's picture

Sugaroo:

Thank YOU!

This future fat fucka of Hollywood (a la Russel Crowe) needs to thank his PR people EVERY day for somehow getting him on lists where they consider him hot.

He is fighting the pudge just as much as Glambert. He's just 'roided up and American women will fall for anything if you slap enough stank and glitz on it.

To me, he looks borderline slapped with a touch of 'tard.
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jonnobaas_sea's picture

Natalie's not a bad singer. I was in HMV Oxford Street in April 1998 & "Torn" was playing on the sound system. I more or less threatned an employee to tell me who is was & where I could by the single. She probably thought I was the CIA from America or something because she was genuinely intimidated. If you're American you can get away w/so much in London shops because they think we all carry sawed off shotguns & will blow away the first yob who doesn do what we say!

"You cross me again Rosie & I'll make a handbag out of you."

Sugaroo's picture

At the risk of getting shanked, WTF is the attraction with this guy? Tom, he's average-looking at best and is a total manwhore.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
George W. Bush has decided to become a motivational speaker, thereby putting his money where his foot usually is.

echobunny's picture

Random.

Pearl_Necklace's picture

I thought Kimbo Stewart was relaxing at a nursing home somewhere awaiting a liver transplant; vaguely remember something about her drinking so much that happened, oh well.

Pearl_Necklace's picture

... keep it moving, nothing to see here/fuckaduck, doublepost.

angel_i's picture

Submitted by Chirio on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 2:07pm.

Submitted by angel_i on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 2:06pm.
"Other" Is ahead of Perez by 30 points!
Make it happen, people! VOTE!

------------------------------------

cool I voted yesterday
******************************
YAY!

ONT: See now that's why Brad left her. She could have rented a door to door private jet.

♥ Threadkilla!
"I told him to tell her to be herself. I think he did and now she's bein a whore!"
~ david Letterman - Staff Fucker
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Chirio's picture

Submitted by angel_i on Fri, 11/27/2009 - 2:06pm.
"Other" Is ahead of Perez by 30 points!
Make it happen, people! VOTE!

------------------------------------

cool I voted yesterday

Coma Caca!!

angel_i's picture

"Other" Is ahead of Perez by 30 points!
Make it happen, people! VOTE!

♥ Threadkilla!
"I told him to tell her to be herself. I think he did and now she's bein a whore!"
~ david Letterman - Staff Fucker
http://www.bestofthe2000s.com/media5.html
"piggy is listed and dlisted isn't! Fuckers." ~ TITS VOTE!

MrPossumsMama's picture

Cisco must have some kinda collagen disorder.

Chirio's picture

Gerard put a kotex pad on your eye! thanks.

Coma Caca!!

Submitted by carefreea on Fri, 11/27/2009 -

Is herpes really a reason behind eye issues like that? Ooh interesting....

*************

It's not the only reason but usually it only accompanies a serious autoimmune disease or herpes. Since Gerald seems healthy otherwise, herpes seems more likely.

carefreea's picture

Natalie's meant to be one of the other women in the Fishsticks/Coldplay mess.

Is herpes really a reason behind eye issues like that? Ooh interesting....

********
"In other news, the University of Color Me Surprised released a report today which states that water is indeed wet. Mind. Boggled" - Michael K, who else?

That's iritis in Gerry's eye. One of the possible causes? Herpes.

angel_i's picture

I just wish he would shave. It really REALLY bothers me.

♥ Threadkilla!
"I told him to tell her to be herself. I think he did and now she's bein a whore!"
~ david Letterman - Staff Fucker
http://www.bestofthe2000s.com/media5.html
"piggy is listed and dlisted isn't! Fuckers." ~ TITS VOTE! (wr

WTF's picture

So sad that he was hot at one time. Now? no more.

sparkys nemesis's picture

Who the mothersanimalcookies is Kimbo Stewart? Thought you meant Kimberly Stewart:)

Chirio's picture

Oh nice...way to go me for clicking on that crap! Jingle balls aight!!!

Coma Caca!!

TITS's picture

Oh dear. All that money and that kimbo person still can't find a haircut that's flattering?

.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
A Dlisted Public Service Announcement: http://www.paris-kim.com/potholes/munch.htm
http://bit.ly/1rcnEc
http://www.wired.co.uk/news/archive/2009-03/24/reports-of-my-death.aspx?...

Helloooooo balls!

Ophelias evil twin's picture

oh I love "Torn". I'm just gonna focus on that in my 'happy place'.

little_rascal's picture

Ewwwwwww!!!!! I clicked on "turkey neck balls" link and there was nekkid Cisco Adler with those shriveled balls dangling to his knees!!!!!
*barfs*

Bree's picture

Oh wow, scratch that. They got a divorce. Shows how much I pay attention. But I'd still be surprised if she joined in that mess!

Bree's picture

Natalie is married, Kimbo is a skank and so is Gerry. Yawn. Next!