But He'll Always Be Baby Gee-Zus To Me
Baby Jesus speaks! No, he really does. The New York Times got to hear him speak actual words for a fluffy profile piece they did on him which ran this past weekend. Cut them some shit, it was Thanksgiving weekend.
In the way-too-long article, we learn that Vadge doesn't give her Brazilian boy toy a crisp $5 bill every morning before he goes to school. Baby Jesus doesn't need it, because apparently he's some superstar DJ who makes $15,000 for a 90-minute set. We're all banging the wrong bitch.
And Baby Jesus also schooled us stupid Americans on the correct way to say his name. It's not pronounced "Gee-zus" or "Hay-soos." Jesus Luz says his full name is pronounced “Zhay-ZOOSE. Loose.” But even Vadge doesn't care about that. Shit, I doubt she knows his name. Whenever she needs him, she just rings the supper bell and opens up her legs. No names needed!
• 
like his bod and his hair. his face, not so much.
Submitted by putas on Tue, 12/01/2009 - 11:13am.
He looks like he has horrible genes. INBRED. small close set eyes...weak bone structure. This thing is a model?
He totally looks inbred. I doubt he would be getting modeling jobs if it weren't for his granny er I mean girlfriend Madge. Hopefully the modeling industry isn't going to start hiring fugtards like this buttwipe.
Rings the super bell and opens up her legs. LMAO MK! Did he put a couple of tennis balls in his underpants?
He looks like he has horrible genes. INBRED. small close set eyes...weak bone structure. This thing is a model?
NOT hot, even with Photoshop!
☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠
BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
DO NOT WANT.
♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀♀
Stars shining bright above you
Night breezes seem to whisper "I love you"
Birds singing in the sycamore tree
Dream a little dream of me
Submitted by Centaurious on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:15pm.
Isn't a pessary an old-fashioned birth control device?
---------it's old fashioned - but it is a weighted object designed to keep the uterus from falling out.
WTF? Can't get the NYT to write about my client's cancer cures, but they write about this dick? Unbelievable!!!
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"Let's unleash the defense lawyers." Nancy Grace.
WTF? Can't get the NYT to write about my client's cancer cures, but they write about this dick? Unbelievable!!!
=========
"Let's unleash the defense lawyers." Nancy Grace.
I'm gonna be controversial and say:'I don't find him that hot'
He's too young to know which way he swings, so Vadge is moving into the role of skank traffic controller.
He'll be wearing pink panties in no time!
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http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe for "Heaux Confessionals©", delivered to your inbox and other holes:
xadesmultimedia@gmail.com
Jesus appears to be a homosexual, which makes sense considering the circumstances.
Also, we will cheer when Jesus eventually takes tired oldbag sizequeen vadge to the cleaners for million$$$$$$$$$$$!
That bulge makes no fucking sense...unless he has a hemi-penis (like a reptile). FAKE!
☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠
BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."
did they stuff his underwear for thanksgiving?
ZAY-ZOOSE, that's fucking lame. I'll call his stupid ass whatever the fuck I feel like calling him.
"There are three things I'm afraid of clowns, homeless people and drag queens" - Jeff Lewis
Oh My Word!. Niceeeeeeeeee!
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"Dying is only worth it, if you have something to live for..."
nice bulge, dumbass but its actually pronounced Yeshua (Jesus in Hebrew).
Not buying the package. But nice photoshopped man teets.
thats a small package
Submitted by Manimal5 on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 10:51pm.
Somehow I don't think Madonna
loves him for his brains.
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What? He doesn't look brainy to you?
♥ Threadkilla!
"I told him to tell her to be herself. I think he did and now she's bein a whore!"
~ david Letterman - Staff Fucker
http://www.bestofthe2000s.com/media5.html
"piggy is listed and dlisted isn't! Fuckers." ~ TITS VOTE!
$15000 for a 90-minute set?! In which universe? Oh, yeah - the "Gigolo Front Universe." Boy needs to feel that he's more than a piece of meat - ZAY-ZOOSE. Bitch, please.
Somehow I don't think Madonna loves him for his brains.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 9:21pm.
Promises.. pfft... yeah, you and Lindsay Lohan too!... junky tiger!... that's alright, i wouldn't have ya any other way... psst... i need a bitch "Royed" when you get a chance... no pressure, when you get around to it... muthafucka's been askin' me to pay my power bill... the nerve!.. there's a filet of electric company worker in it for ya!... and maybe... *dangling catnip*
-----------------------------
"The sword of time will pierce our skins
It doesn't hurt when it begins
But as it works its way on in
The pain grows stronger, watch it grin"
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 9:09pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 9:06pm.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 9:01pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:51pm.
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:48pm.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:30pm.
socky come back!... i still luvs ya cashmere self!!
~~~~~~~~~
Ya said the magic word. Cashmere!
*******************************************
But if you ever wanted to change your name to reflect your true heritage, might I suggest Polly Kottun? No really, it has a nice ring to it....*rolling tiger eyes*....
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*pinches sixth nipple*.. quiet down!.. i haven't seen socky in a bit!... don't make me bring up the fact that you have an orange tiger in your background... impure whitey!!LOL!
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NOT TRUE!!! NOT TRUE!! *running to mirror to check tiger fur roots and adjust blue contacts...er, I mean...put visine in BLUE tiger eyes....*
---------------------------------
go ahead... try to cover it up... i got two words for ya... "They're Grreeaatt!"... oh yeah, i did the research!LOL!
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I-I....I never tried to hide my Frosted Flakes past...It's just when I set sights on a career in Vegas, I decided to ditch it you know? Roy was so helpful at first, but I couldn't take the pressure of preforming on stage...That's when he introduced me to catnip...Oh sure, I'd tried it as a tiger teen to look cool, but I got into it DEEP, DEEP I say...then the next thing I know, I'm strung out on stage with that old fart cream puff bonkin' my nose with the mic...Cream Puff/Frosted Flakes...In a nipped out moment, I lost my shit, proclaimed "They're GRRRRRREAT!" to the audience and Royed a bitch like Hasselhoff attacking a cheeseburger after bathing in a vat of Jim Beam....Fortunately, they got me before I could Sigfried a bitch...I went to rehab, Promises in Malibu and I'm a changed tiger now...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
he looks like a greasy boring pig
like after 20 minutes.. its like seeyah
i hate white underwear on men btw
OT: "Zhay-ZOOSE LOOSE" is what Madonna calls baby Jeezus' ass lips when they are flapping in the wind right after she crams a 10" spiked dildo up his ass.
zhayzoose won the fucking lottery
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 9:06pm.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 9:01pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:51pm.
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:48pm.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:30pm.
socky come back!... i still luvs ya cashmere self!!
~~~~~~~~~
Ya said the magic word. Cashmere!
*******************************************
But if you ever wanted to change your name to reflect your true heritage, might I suggest Polly Kottun? No really, it has a nice ring to it....*rolling tiger eyes*....
--------------------------------------
*pinches sixth nipple*.. quiet down!.. i haven't seen socky in a bit!... don't make me bring up the fact that you have an orange tiger in your background... impure whitey!!LOL!
******************************************
NOT TRUE!!! NOT TRUE!! *running to mirror to check tiger fur roots and adjust blue contacts...er, I mean...put visine in BLUE tiger eyes....*
---------------------------------
go ahead... try to cover it up... i got two words for ya... "They're Grreeaatt!"... oh yeah, i did the research!LOL!
-----------------------------
"The sword of time will pierce our skins
It doesn't hurt when it begins
But as it works its way on in
The pain grows stronger, watch it grin"
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 9:02pm
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Oh Socky, I KEED, I KEED...We all know it would be more along the lines of Polly NiLawn....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by little_rascal on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:59pm.
@ sock-monkey
You really think Jesus stuffed a sock in his tighty whities??? And all this time I was sitting glazed-eyed and staring at his splendid bulge and drooling....I was drooling over a .... rolled sock????
~~~~~~~~~~
Me knows a sock when she sees one. Trust. Me have had to testify as an expert witness for the defense! Hee! Hee!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 9:01pm.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:51pm.
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:48pm.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:30pm.
socky come back!... i still luvs ya cashmere self!!
~~~~~~~~~
Ya said the magic word. Cashmere!
*******************************************
But if you ever wanted to change your name to reflect your true heritage, might I suggest Polly Kottun? No really, it has a nice ring to it....*rolling tiger eyes*....
--------------------------------------
*pinches sixth nipple*.. quiet down!.. i haven't seen socky in a bit!... don't make me bring up the fact that you have an orange tiger in your background... impure whitey!!LOL!
******************************************
NOT TRUE!!! NOT TRUE!! *running to mirror to check tiger fur roots and adjust blue contacts...er, I mean...put visine in BLUE tiger eyes....*
**********************************
Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:51pm.
But if you ever wanted to change your name to reflect your true heritage, might I suggest Polly Kottun? No really, it has a nice ring to it....*rolling tiger eyes*....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
*walking onto thread carrying a steaming plate of tender zookeeper torso cut in strips sautéed in Cajun spices with CATNIP, peapods, mushrooms, carrots and sundried tomatoes, tossed in a light cream entrails sauce*
Guess SOMEBODY doesn't want a little din-din me prepared!
ON T: Me wonders..Does he play a musical instrument?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:51pm.
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:48pm.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:30pm.
socky come back!... i still luvs ya cashmere self!!
~~~~~~~~~
Ya said the magic word. Cashmere!
*******************************************
But if you ever wanted to change your name to reflect your true heritage, might I suggest Polly Kottun? No really, it has a nice ring to it....*rolling tiger eyes*....
--------------------------------------
*pinches sixth nipple*.. quiet down!.. i haven't seen socky in a bit!... don't make me bring up the fact that you have an orange tiger in your background... impure whitey!!LOL!
-----------------------------
"The sword of time will pierce our skins
It doesn't hurt when it begins
But as it works its way on in
The pain grows stronger, watch it grin"
Freaking funny, this guy is a so called $15 grand DJ , I wonder what planet he spins on? Never ever heard of this guy on the nightclub circuit, he wishes! Because he is Madonna's cabana boy makes him a world wide DJ now, pathetic. Madonna should drop this wannabe
@ sock-monkey
You really think Jesus stuffed a sock in his tighty whities??? And all this time I was sitting glazed-eyed and staring at his splendid bulge and drooling....I was drooling over a .... rolled sock????
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:48pm.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:30pm.
socky come back!... i still luvs ya cashmere self!!
~~~~~~~~~
Ya said the magic word. Cashmere!
-----------------------------------
i hope you know i luv ya Socky!... always have, always will!... you're one of the originals!
OT: really?!... it just doesn't seem like i would do that
-----------------------------
"The sword of time will pierce our skins
It doesn't hurt when it begins
But as it works its way on in
The pain grows stronger, watch it grin"
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:48pm.
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:30pm.
socky come back!... i still luvs ya cashmere self!!
~~~~~~~~~
Ya said the magic word. Cashmere!
*******************************************
But if you ever wanted to change your name to reflect your true heritage, might I suggest Polly Kottun? No really, it has a nice ring to it....*rolling tiger eyes*....
**********************************
Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Submitted by EveryStrangersEyes on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:30pm.
socky come back!... i still luvs ya cashmere self!!
~~~~~~~~~
Ya said the magic word. Cashmere!
ON T: Me thinking he wears a full body condom before he dives into the her Carlsbad Cavern. Bitch has her own ecosystem up in that cave.
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Oh, Puhleez. His name is pronounced Hay-soos but he wants to put an exotic spin on it in order to sound unique. This guy would be a perfect match for JLo. Oh, I mean Zhanafa Lupus. She makes her own money too . . .
Shouldn't TV be here to placate Sock Monkey?
Figures....he is off to do the devil's dirty work, when he should be here and cleaning up his own!!!!!
________________________________
"I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host."
Hi karmaskull!, @Centaurious - "Gotta make hay while the sun shine"...SO RIGHT...Madonna bangs him 'cause she can!! I would if I could too!!
_____________________
Yeah, what the hell's the big deal?
I'm in my early 40's and my goal is to bang the hottest, youngest guys I can until I hit the nursing home!
If you keep yourself in pretty decent shape and are reasonably cool, it is possible...although I will admit, Jesus is out of my league...sigh!
________________________________
"I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host."
Submitted by Manimal5 on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:32pm.
I love you Socky...but I'm going with liquid fabric softener!!!
~~~~~~~~
Manimal! *sock monkey hugs & smooches*
ON T: Ya know he stuffed his panties. Me thinking...rolled up sock! Yes, me said it! A sock! A fucking sock! *stomping off*
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Chirio, LOL Centy with her sugar walls ((dies))
___________________
Jesus is my PRINCE!!!
We are purple with passion...and hot with desire...
________________________________
"I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host."
@Centaurious - "Gotta make hay while the sun shine"...SO RIGHT...Madonna bangs him 'cause she can!! I would if I could too!!
@MichaelK - "We're all banging the wrong bitch."...Your poetry makes my day. And here I am thinking my shit don't stink 'cause banging Mr. Karmaskull lets me live in the 'burbs in a split-level...
And yeah, I don't know who wrote previously, but Zay-Loose looks dumb as a stump. But then again, he probably fucks three times a night, so who am I judge? Madonna probably eats children for her energy and can afford to have someone peel her off the ceiling after a Zsa Zsa session...
"Excuse me, do these effectively hide my thunder? "
Submitted by Clarisse on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:22pm.
*hands socky lavender vanilla softener sheet*
~~~~~~
*little sock monkey love & smooches* *deep sniff* mmmm...my favorite!
ON T: Spray on abs.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:27pm.
Submitted by ESE on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:15pm.
-------------------------------
no!... no!... THIS is the poor lil sock-monkey that TV sent out turnin' tricks that i was tellin' you about!LOL!
.. sorry to bring this all out sock... *smooch*
~~~~~~~~~~
*crossing arms* *stomping off*
I love you Socky...but I'm going with liquid fabric softener!!!
LOL Centy with her sugar walls ((dies))
Coma Caca!!
CHIRIO!!!, I thought his last name was Cristo!
__________________________
No, that's MY last name!
Jesus, c'mon into my pearly, sugar-walled, GATES, if you please!
_________________________________
"I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host."
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Mon, 11/30/2009 - 8:27pm.
socky come back!... i still luvs ya cashmere self!!
-----------------------------
"The sword of time will pierce our skins
It doesn't hurt when it begins
But as it works its way on in
The pain grows stronger, watch it grin"
ESE, Mani, if i can help some poor souls not to get hooked on the dryer sheets i've done my job!LOL!
____________________________
Well, it's too late for me.....sadly....sniff.
Every day before I leave the house I wipe a dryer sheet all over my clothing and hair so I don't get static electricity.
Am I finished?
_________________________________
"I like to have a martini,
Two at the very most.
After three I'm under the table,
after four I'm under my host."