JNoooooo
JLo wanted to be extra sparkly for her New Year's Eve performance in NYC last night, so she slipped on an Edward Cullen sparklesuit. Unfortunately, this display of sadness was anything but sparkly. That shit made her nalgas look like two partially deflated whoopee cushions, and her crotch was so depressed that it couldn't even muster up an appetite. If you're going to wear a catsuit at least make sure your camel toe is at the top of its game. Tis a fucking pity.
And when it comes to the "Jesus on a cross" pose, Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs wins every single time. JLo tried to out-pose him, but lost miserably. Thanks for playing.
Click here for the NSFWish version of the Buffalo Bill portrait. Warning: It will give you a fever.
• 
"Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me, I'd fuck me HARD"
2010 is only a few days old but I think we have a winner for the antidote to viagra!
Submitted by putas on Sun, 01/03/2010 - 12:06pm.
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LoL.I think of that movie EVERYTIME I hear "American Girl".always.no matter what.
**** That is ME♥ ****
EvilShoe:
That ıs what I am tryıng to fınd out from you sluts.
How much to take?
My pılls are 1000mcg each and I have read to take anywhere from 1000-8000mcg a day. Your body cannot overdose on ıt because any extra ıs excreted from your body ın urıne, but someone advıse.
I only took two yesterday but I am prepared to do some Valley of the Dolls shıt!
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http://www.myspace.com/triston
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*chews fat*
So, uhm, is that her real hair or is it a weave, wig, or some dead animal? I'm guessing this is why we're discussing Biotin, too.
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Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
Let's not forget the amazing song playing while Buffalo Bill was cavorting in said cape in SOTL.. I want to look it up now. Very good tune! But it was sort of ruined for me after connecting it to that scene.. kind of like Tom Petty's 'American Girl' was ruined when it was used when the fat chick/senator's daughter was listening to it on full blast in her car right before Buffalo Bill kidnapped her ass. SOTL soundtrack!
OT: In concerts people used to hold up lighters. Now they hold up iphones.
"It seems like it was just yesterday that we were all boozing, bonging and blowjobbing in 2000."- MK
dayum JLOW how LOW WILL YOU GO??? YOu are such a no talent skank...I used to think you had some talent but it is just overwhelming ego wrapped in a plastic surgery so-so body and face...,will you please go away....YOU ARE OFFICIALLY IRRELEVANT!!
Submitted by HoityToity on Sun, 01/03/2010 - 12:44am.
http://ezinearticles.com/?Biotin-Hair-Loss---You-Should-Seriously-Look-a...
I was browsing around about it and I don't think it prevents it but its something they tell people to use once their hair starts thinning. I use it for metabolizing food it works good for me. My hair grows so fast from taking it! I read that if you take a lot of antacids it keeps your body from absorbing Biotin, I didn't know that! Biotin is a Vitamin, not an RX. I usually wait for CVS or Walgreens to have a sale on the 5000mcg pills and get them Buy 1 Get 1 Free. I did get a bottle at Winn-Dixie recently and it was like $7 for 60 pills on sale.
Good luck!
@tweak said "she looks like assy wassy the long lost sparkly teletubby" LMAO!!!!
Great link, islandgirl. Forgot about that one. Tx.
Submitted by EvilShoe on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 9:18pm.
What is Biotin prescribed for? Is it a prescription medication or can you get it over the counter? Does the hair actually grow back? How about hair that was thinning for quite a few years now? Do you know if it helps with that? Thanks in advance if you answer.
hey is that cher in the last thumbnail?
She looks like "assy wassy " the long lost sparkly teletubby
I'm just wondering how much Spanx she's wearing to fit into that glittery epic FAIL of an outfit. Not even the gays can get behind this tragedy of an outfit!
"When dick is rancid, you know as soon as you pull the fly down. Seriously, you can smell it right away. It's like a week-old grilled cheese sandwich lying on a hot subway seat in the middle of August."
Damn, that Buffalo Bill photo is going to haunt my dreams tonight, which might be an improvement actually...
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Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.
Submitted by TheBreakdown on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 3:20pm.
I take 5000 a day, my capsules are 5000 each. I used to take (5) 1000 tablets through-out the day but it was a pain-in-the-ass.
I don't take it for my hair but it does make it grow like crazy.
JLo is wearing the candidatard. She had better take some probiotics before she starts popping muffins out of that dark, dank sweatshop between her legs.
If I were JLo's manager I'd suggest she return to movıes, where she has more cover for her medıocracy.
Because when she ıs on stage ıt ıs clearly evıdent that her best days have been over sınce Bush stole that fırst electıon!
***************************************
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe for "Heaux Confessionals©", delivered to your inbox and other holes:
xadesmultimedia@gmail.com
Green Is Good:
I have read so many dıfferıng thıgns. I heard anythıng from 2000mcg to 5000mcg a day. My tablets are 1000mcg and I already took one.
Should I take two a day or three then?
***************************************
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe for "Heaux Confessionals©", delivered to your inbox and other holes:
xadesmultimedia@gmail.com
she looks like a sparkly potato
_______________________________________________
Dale Doback: Okay, here's the shot out of the cannon: Oprah, Barbara Walters, your wife. You gotta fuck one, marry one, kill one, go!
Submitted by TheBreakdown on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 10:44am.
So I got some Biotin for my haır but the question ıs how many mcg a day should I take?
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Biotin works. Period. Take 1000 to 1200 mcg daily. That's micrograms. My Dermatologist recommended it. Again IT WORKS, Triston! Good for the hair and skin. My hair was thinning and now it coming back with a vengeance.
Diana Ross does not even look thıs bad NOW.
JLo just had a heaux up or blow up moment wıth thıs fashıon mısfıre.
BLOW UP!
EPIC FAIL!
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Submitted by magdalene on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 2:39pm.
ha-- big surprise. she stole this whole look from Diana Ross who wore it in her Central Park concert in '83:
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Diana rocked the outfit! The outfit on JLo makes her look preggers or fat. Take your pick but either way she looks bad!
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"Wait until the bitch finds the family of wombats living in her chocha." - MK
ha-- big surprise. she stole this whole look from Diana Ross who wore it in her Central Park concert in '83:
http://assets.nydailynews.com/img/2008/07/04/amd_dianaross.jpg
there's no question as to who had the better catsuit ass:
http://thelifeofriley.squarespace.com/storage/dianacentralpark.jpg
first she thought she could fit into one of Jackie Kennedy's vintage dresses, now she's Diana Ross in a catsuit. this heifer is delusional.
Looking at that Buffalo Bill pic makes me wanna watch SOTL. I like how just as he's doing the tuck, when we see just the top part of him, he kinda makes a face like he's doing something difficult. I still can never watch the scene when Lecter kills the cops.
Looks like she forgot to shave down there too.
Thanks zomay, me too. The last half of 2009 sucked donkey balls, but never mind. I am a "glass is half full" kinda person. :)
MizRo on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 1:39pm.
Gracias querida, igualmente
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♥
TheBreakdown on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 1:30pm.
'Muthafucka! I supported you durıng your meth-crackery, kept treadıng you above water when no one ın Amerıca was buyıng your shıt, bore you kıds from my beauty pageant lıneage and THEN you leave me for thıs latına-lıght hussy?! Oh hell, hell, HELL to the goddamn NAW...
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Ha!
Gracias querida, igualmente.
Mizro, Island Girl,
Hope you guys have a positive 2010.
Triston: PREACH ON!
It WAS kept on the quiet but I remember everything about this loathesome strumpet.
I hope Daya Torres is happy and making bank on the cash-incentive to keep it quashed.
Submitted by zomay on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 1:26pm.
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zomay!! Happy happy things to you and yours... xoxox!!
Just imagine that bag of Marc (Mark?) bones looking down/up at you every four or five weeks, and then you have to scream at the nannies to do it right.
I couldn't do it. :P
Hi zomay - feliz 2010!
That's not enough for me but it is gross.
MizRo:
Ms. Torres should have taken her shıt to the press when ıt fırst went down cuz that was decıdely hush-hush back ın the day.
I would have been lıke thıs to Marc:
'Muthafucka! I supported you durıng your meth-crackery, kept treadıng you above water when no one ın Amerıca was buyıng your shıt, bore you kıds from my beauty pageant lıneage and THEN you leave me for thıs latına-lıght hussy?! Oh hell, hell, HELL to the goddamn NAW...
I'm goıng to Good Mornıng Amerıca and havıng a chat wıth Dıane Sawyeer, bıtch!'
***************************************
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Capt. Stottlemeyer looks like a laaadddy LOL
Love the Buffalo Bill pic. too funny!
and I find it hard to belive that JLo has any fans at all.
Her Karma is sleeping with Mark everynight!
Haaaahaaaahaaaaahaaaahaaaaaaaaaa.
Now that is a scared straight story for youngins.
Preach, Triston!
I want to see some come-uppence. Tangible pariah-status.
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 12:31pm.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvQex1RQ5G4
:)
Oh, and I forgot to add.
Karma ıs not just a bıtch.
ıt ıs a muthafucka.
Cuz she trıcked and cajoled her way to the top and then she got there I wıll admıt but not wıthout a cost.
Now she ıs mıddlıng and everyone she stepped on to get there ıs seeıng the sıde effects of fame.
Her ass aın't all that after all!
***************************************
http://www.myspace.com/triston
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xadesmultimedia@gmail.com
Seırously.
WTF was she thınkıng when she ALLOWED thıs contraptıon (because that ıs THE only word to fıt thıs sartorıal meltown) to stay on her saggy ass, knees, and tıtty balls?!
She should be beat wıthın an ınch of her lıfe for thıs.
She has not been relevant sınce the EARLY 00s.
And I am beıng generous.
***************************************
http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe for "Heaux Confessionals©", delivered to your inbox and other holes:
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Old, sad and desperate. I actually thought she'd end up better than this. I was wrong.
************
I like living this way. I like loving this way.
Her stomach doesn't look flat at all.
beaker's bitch: oddly enough, my sil just left and I hopped back in and saw your comment.
Thank you re: JHo, it came from the heart. I've seen right through her schtick since minute 1.
I don't like catty women either: she has always thought herself to be the shit and is a flea in comparison to Salma and Paltrow. Narcissistic betch.
Submitted by MizRo on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 9:53am.
Great post, MizRo. You nailed all the reasons I despise this bitch as well. The only thing I could add to that is that I hate bitches who have to be catty ass bitches in their interviews about other women. I'm talking about that interview from a long time ago that a dlister linked one time where she was up and coming and thought she was hot shit. She talked crap about Salma Hayek and Gwyneth Paltrow and someone else and how much better she was than them. Funny how they both got Oscar noms/awards after that while her career went down the shitter and is relegated to shitty rom coms. Her last interview with InStyle from a few months ago was the same. She said some crap about how Skeletor calls her 'muse' because she is the only person he ever wanted to take pictures of, unspoken dig at his ex wife. I guess she thinks she's more important than his kids, too. Disgusting human being.
Hi Mama Moore, thanks for re-reading. Just one more thing: Mickey is short for Michelle, so I'm kinda of the female persuasion.
Submitted by Bowchickawawa on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 1:49am.
@StickaCockinWoo... on Fri, 01/01/2010 - 4:31pm.
@ Bowchickawawa
I didn't see your ass on stage dancing in high heel shoes slithering around looking sexy. No a woman that can appreciate a sexy body that just pushed out kids, her age, the weather, singing and dancing. It's not an easy feat but she did it.
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Wow. Why all the hostility JLO? I was right, wasn't I? You ARE JHo posting under an alias. Read again puta, I said I thought you looked good last night. It's just your "music" I can't stand.
I posted my comment about spreading hips in response to someone's question about whether pregnancy could make someone's ass flatter and wider. It may have been a long-winded response ('tis my style unfortunately) and a bit boring but it was about pregnancy in general, not specifically your pregnancy or ass.
I posted my comment and went out for the night. I am sure you probably won't see this one because you are likely busy shooting up with Skeletor but who knows...maybe you will. Night night!
PS. Being carried around ala Britney 2008 VMA's and lip-synching DO NOT qualify as singing and dancing. If it does, I too can have a career as a pop star.
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OH SHIT!
I love your avie, Bowchika. I've eaten it. It's now on my hard drive. I eat all avies I like.
ALL YOUR AVIES ARE BELONG TO MEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!
She has a nasty ass ass.
Holy shit. I didn't see this. Thank God I didn't. It would have burned an image of this monstrosity on my TV.
Ha! Talking about Buffalo Bill. The actor who played him lived in Washington Heights (this goes back about 15 years ago) and there were a few times I waited for the train on a lonely platform on 190 st on the A train line with him sitting next to me on the bench.
I swear I was shit scared. I could not find myself talking to him. hahaha!
My Ex-husband also found himself on the train with him and said the same thing. He was scared of Buffalo Bill.
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"Let's unleash the defense lawyers." Nancy Grace.
I bet the stylist that left all the powdery stuf on Kidman's face dressed up JLo. The stylist must suffer from retinal degeneration.
Tits smashed flat against her chest, waist thickened, and looking like she has a set of falling down asses, front and back is not at all an attractive look for Mrs. Skeletor.
If she wants to see how dressing well in tight fitting outfits is done, let the bitch google some pics of Marlene Dietrich. Now that was a woman who could wear skin tight with class even when she was in her 70's!