Hot Slut Of The Day!
The aptly named Angel, the gold-hearted golden retriever who saved an 11-year-old boy from a blood thirsty cougar! Fortunately for everyone involved, the cougar was not Sharon Stone. If it was, this would be a tragic tale since that bitch is ruthless when it comes to animals.
Young Austin Forman was collecting firewood from the yard of his family's home in Boston Bar, British Columbia (this already sounds like the making of a Hallmark Hall of Fame movie), when he noticed a cougar coming out of the darkness (or maybe a Disney movie). Austin knew that was his cue to drop the wood and take his ass inside. But the cougar was ready to rumble right then and there. Luckily, the family dog Angel (aka the second coming of Lassie AND Benji) was there and stepped in to take that pussy down. Angel and the cougar started going at it. But when the cougar tore into Angel like Kirstie Alley on a turducken, Austin screamed for help. Austin's mother, who was inside, called the police.
An officer happened to be nearby (okay, this is a Disney movie AND a Hallmark Hall of Fame special) and immediately came to Angel's rescue. The officer shot the cougar, but that didn't stop the determined pussy from tearing at Angel's neck. So the officer shot the cougar again, killing it. Angel was taken to a local caregiver where she's recuperating from her wounds.
Meanwhile, my dog just looked up at me with "DON'T YOU EVEN" eyes. If a cougar came at me, that bitch would clear out my pockets, give me the sign of the cross and then hail a cab for himself only. This is the truth.
Below is a clip from the local news of Austin and his mother telling the tale of Angel vs. Pussy. And is it just last night's party in my eyes or is that cougar giving us sexyface even in death?
(For Melissa)
• 
Ugh, Leno just did a variation on your joke, MK!
Go Angel!! Hilarious MK!!
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Proud love child of Oprah Winfrey & Bill Gates
This story is sooooo 'Where the Red Fern Grows'. I told that to the hubby and he gave me a blank look and then I had to tell him the story of Old Dan and Little Ann and of course starting crying at the end... I am such a wuss.... And now I am off to watch Milo and Otis so my heart can truly explode from dog love."
OMG! I was thinking exactly the same thing! I actually had to recount the story of 'Where the Red Fern Grows' to my co-worker who recently got two redboned coonhounds (just like Old Dan and Lil' Ann). I choked up as I recounted the
I love the abundance of Canadian accents in this clip.
When I was younger I was obsessed with Redbone hounds because of "Where the Red Fern Grows" (Next to Anne of Green Gables it was my favorite book) Who am I kidding? I still really want one....
Lane, I have been going to this high school for 7 years. I'm no dummy.
I just read somewhere that a wildlife rehab place recently released a mountain lion back into the wild in a remote area in Connecticut. wonderful.
There have been rumors in the paper for years about mountain lion sightings in my CT town (much like Bigfoot), but no one has ever gotten a photo. just reports of cougar poop and tracks, which are dubious.
I walk in the woods a lot with my chickenshit dog, and always half-wonder if one day I am going to be ambushed. That would be interesting. for about last 30 seconds.
We've got coyotes and bears here now, I've seen both on a regular basis, and never worried about it. They don't often go around attacking people.
Mountain lions are a whole nuther matter.
This "sighting", is a half-mile away from my house. Where I walk my dog.
http://newtownbee.com/Features/Features/2008%5C05-May%5C2008-05-08__13-3...
And how could you fail to comment on the vision that is the anchorwoman Lisa Laflamme in this video??
I love Angel She's such a sweet baby! That was great!
Oh hey!!! After reading down, I feel better!
*trees all around*
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Finish up them taters, I’m gonna go fondle my sweaters.
Oy! I iz fightin it, but, but, but......
Love the dog, but if the mountain lions natural habitat wasn't decimated....
*hugs tree*
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Finish up them taters, I’m gonna go fondle my sweaters.
"This story is sooooo 'Where the Red Fern Grows'. I told that to the hubby and he gave me a blank look and then I had to tell him the story of Old Dan and Little Ann and of course starting crying at the end... I am such a wuss.... And now I am off to watch Milo and Otis so my heart can truly explode from dog love."
OMG! I was thinking exactly the same thing! I actually had to recount the story of 'Where the Red Fern Grows' to my co-worker who recently got two redboned coonhounds (just like Old Dan and Lil' Ann). I choked up as I recounted the end of the book. I think he thought I was nuts.
I love the abundance of Canadian accents in this clip.
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If love had a dick I would eff with it. But it doesn't (it has a no crotch like Barbie).
Snideychick sez:
All labradors are very protective of their owners. We had a black Lab named Lucky who would give warning growls to anyone he didn't know. After a warning he'd go for a leg or hand. Many a pantleg was ripped by that pooch.
RIP Lucky!
Another brilliant post by our Michael! I laughed out loud at this one, and so appreciated the textured humor (ala Sharon Stone & her history of fur coats, Kirstie's diet travails). Like another person who commented on this story, I want to note how much I appreciate your defense of animals. You have the power to educate and influence people -- so keep scolding those celebrities who buy their dogs at pet stores.
"I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member"
"a cougar came at me, that bitch would clear out my pockets, give me the sign of the cross and then hail a cab for himself only. This is the truth."
I nearly just spit tea from my nose all over my laptop. You are too friggin much, Michael!
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Champion fist-pumper and true inventor of the friggin' pouf.
Do you see where they keep that poor dog... Outside in a crate with a single blanket! That's gratitude for ya.
Very heartwarming story!! But just for the record .. I have a "Lassie" dog, and she is the biggest chickenshit on the face of the earth. She ACTS all tough and shit, but when it comes down to brass tacks, bitch will turn tail and run from a threat every time. I've seen her do it.
Usually, it's the neighbor's cat.
If me and her are faced with a cougar in the woods, I'm pretty much on my own.
Hiccups.
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I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
Hiccups.
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I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
SpiceDong on Wed, 01/06/2010 - 10:47am
I don't want to steal Angel's thunder, she is a REAL HERO.
But I feel bad for the cougar too. It was doing what it only knew too.
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I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
Submitted by BRADIFUL BITCH on Wed, 01/06/2010 - 10:25am.
This is an awesome story.
But it is RARE that Cougars or any large predator would do this.
8====================> (_*_)
That's what happens when humans destroy and invade these creature's habitats...predators soon find themselves looking for food on someone's backyard and going after whatever they can get out of hunger...I am sorry for the dog and glad she survived, but I am also sorry for the cougar.
"I Loooove my vagina....because my vagina makes moneyyyy!" - Molly Shannon as the late Anna Nicole Smith
@DirtyWhoreMouth - You suck, please stay on your side of the border; we don't like your war-mongering kind here.
Nice choice for hot slut, MK! I think I should look into trading in my useless cat...
Common sense is the genius of humanity - Goethe
This dog is fantastic! My dumb-ass dog would have given the cougar two pieces of rye bread, swiss cheese and honey mustard for my ass.
"Jesus and God really need to file a joint lawsuit against bitches for dragging their good names into unadulterated fuckery!" MK 2/15/09
This is an awesome story.
But it is RARE that Cougars or any large predator would do this. Hope the cougar didn't have any cubs near by.
/\
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
This is an awesome story.
But it is RARE that Cougars or any large predator would do this. Hope the cougar didn't have any cubs near by.
/\
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
This is an awesome story.
But it is RARE that Cougars or any large predator would do this. Hope the cougar didn't have any cubs near by.
/\
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
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Dogs are amazing. They are so loyal. I'm sure if the police officer wasn't there to shoot the cougar, the dog Angel would've kept fighting the cougar until the very last breath to save that boy.
How dare MK make me laugh at a picture of a dead cougar. He is both vile and freakin' fantastic at the same time. Love your devilish humour MK and that you love animals, too!!
--What the What?!!!
Awww, a cat would NEVER do this...
I'm just saying!
*runs from the pussy lovahs!*
TEAM PUPPEHS!
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onetakenfreak!
Why didnt these fools living in the woods have their own gun!!! I was raised on a farm and I would have shot the damn cougar myself if it was killing my dog.
My cold heart melted a little bit after seeing this story... but only a little bit.
Man just when I thought I couldn't love (most) animals any more.
Animals 1 - Asshole Simpson, Lohan, Parasite...all other jerkoff humans 0.
"Genius may have its limitations, but stupidity is not thus handicapped"
- Elbert Hubbard
Submitted by TITS on Wed, 01/06/2010 - 9:33am.
*throws wet tissues at Sugaroo*
*splat*
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
*peels tissue off nose and flings at the cat*
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Never step into the path of a single woman and the last kielbasa sausage, it is very dangerous. That is dinner and a date all in one! - urmomma
TEAM FEAR THE PUSSY
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"poor jacko, trying to struggle thru this world with one eye and the womenz just keep fucking his shit UP!" snowpiece, The Fortune Teller 11/25/09
kewl stary! very hallmark channel! that pussy is totally giving death sexy face~ wooo! and LOL @
*****
If a cougar came at me, that bitch would clear out my pockets, give me the sign of the cross and then hail a cab for himself only. This is the truth.
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"And I went through this whole thing; am I gay?! Am I straight?! And I realized: I'm just slutty." ~Margaret Cho
"This is supposed to be about delicious booze!" ~MK
Canadian cops are hot... what with their constables and mounties. I bet they get more ass than their American counterparts, just based on the titles.
Those cougars are magnificent predators but unfortunately, mankind is encroaching into their habitat more and more, so unpleasant encounters are more likely to happen.
This story is sooooo 'Where the Red Fern Grows'. I told that to the hubby and he gave me a blank look and then I had to tell him the story of Old Dan and Little Ann and of course starting crying at the end... I am such a wuss.... And now I am off to watch Milo and Otis so my heart can truly explode from dog love.
Lane, I have been going to this high school for 7 years. I'm no dummy.
*throws wet tissues at Sugaroo*
*splat*
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
A Dlisted Public Service Announcement: http://www.paris-kim.com/potholes/munch.htm
http://bit.ly/1rcnEc
http://www.wired.co.uk/news/archive/2009-03/24/reports-of-my-death.aspx?...
Evilshoe I would've been out there with something to beat the hell out of that middle aged woman that was gnawing on my dog too. ____________________________________________
"DWM I just really hope you are 4'9" and orange , IRL or I'm going to be shattered" -
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 01/05/2010 - 3:56pm.
Austin screamed for help. Austin's mother, who was inside, called the police.
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Maybe I'm just a bitch or a massive animal lover but if my son yelled for help saying a cougar was outside and fighting the family dog, last thing I'd be doing is calling the police! I'd delegate that to someone and run my ass out there with a bat/golf club (Elin style!) or SOMETHING!
I love how the boy says "The dog" and not "My dog".
I'm with Helena, PMS sucks.
MK, your retelling of this story was pure perfection. Ha!
HSOD for tomorrow - the anchorwoman
For the next day - the mom
For the day after that - the cop
For the day after that - the cousin
For the day after that - the dad
For the day after that - whoever picked out the shirt the dad is wearing....
TITS felt something???? *writes that down and then dies in shock*
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Never step into the path of a single woman and the last kielbasa sausage, it is very dangerous. That is dinner and a date all in one! - urmomma
*sniff*
aw what a sweet... *sniff*
*crys*
.o.o.o.o.0.0.0.O.O.O.0.0.0.o.o.o.o.
A Dlisted Public Service Announcement: http://www.paris-kim.com/potholes/munch.htm
http://bit.ly/1rcnEc
http://www.wired.co.uk/news/archive/2009-03/24/reports-of-my-death.aspx?...
It's a good thing *I* didn't tell MK about this - you guys never would have known.
♥ Threadkilla!
Did you have a nice time last night, WHORE?
Also, I'd just like to say that by alerting our media to this story that this is Canada's way of warning the US -- Canada is the Cougar and the US is the Golden Retriever. They've been quiet for too long. Let's attack them.
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"DWM I just really hope you are 4'9" and orange , IRL or I'm going to be shattered" -
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 01/05/2010 - 3:56pm.
I saw this yesterday while I was getting ready for work. The Today show ruined my entire day.
I also want to know why we give a shit about Canada. I care about the dog but not the canadian boy. Bring us the dog! ____________________________________________
"DWM I just really hope you are 4'9" and orange , IRL or I'm going to be shattered" -
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 01/05/2010 - 3:56pm.
maybe they'll upgrade Angel's living conditions
*****
"Now listen - I gave you that birthday, darling. Huh. I mean, you wouldn't have that birthday if I hadn't been generous enough to uncross my legs and give you to the world." -Edina Monsoon
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
Dogs are fucking rad. Go, Angel! Thank god I wore waterproof mascara today; this shit brought me to tears. I hate PMS.
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I like boring things.
Poor baby has a fractured skull. :-(
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Never step into the path of a single woman and the last kielbasa sausage, it is very dangerous. That is dinner and a date all in one! - urmomma
one more reason why I'm a "dog person" and I give cats the side eye
*****
"Now listen - I gave you that birthday, darling. Huh. I mean, you wouldn't have that birthday if I hadn't been generous enough to uncross my legs and give you to the world." -Edina Monsoon
http://www.myspace.com/luscious_t_999
Unconditional love and incredible bravery. Angel, you more than live up to your name!
Angel is Hot Slut of the Year. We're only six days in and already have a winner.
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"Tis a fucking pity.”