Conan O'Brien Might Quit This Bitch
Yesterday morning, NBC's Chairman Jeff Gaspin fucked us all with the DUH stick by saying that Jay Leno will move his chin out of the 10pm slot on February 12th. Once the Winter Olympics finishes up, Jay will sit down in his new home at 11:35pm. Jeff went on to say that NBC is hoping Conan O'Brien will stay on as host of The Tonight Show, which will start at 12:05am (more like The Tomorrow Show). Jimmy Fallon's talk show will shoot itself up in the eyeballs with meth so it can stay awake for the 1:05am slot. However, all of this is up in the air, because Conan has yet to give the thumbs up to it.
The New York Post says that it's likely Conan will take his thumb and shove it up the peacock's ass. Last night, Conan apparently had a meeting with FOX about hosting a late-night show there. A source close to Conan said, "This level of shittiness was not expected. He's done a great job for NBC. He moved his entire staff, he moved his family to LA. And five months later, they repay him like this? Conan would be happier somewhere else."
If the Chicago Sun-Times is right, then it sounds like Conan could be much happier scratching his nalgas on his sofa while catching up on his stories. That's because if Conan decides to quit NBC and not move to another network, the peacock will have to buy him out of his contract by writing him a check for $80 million ($20 million per year for the remaining 4 years). And even if Conan does go to another network, NBC might still have to cut him a yearly check. Let's say FOX agrees to pay Conan $10 million a year, NBC will have to put another $10 million in his cleavage to fulfill the terms of his contract with them. Basically, the ginge will still be pissing liquid gold no matter what happens.
If I was Conan, I'd just move my talk show to public access for $1 a year, and air nothing but masturbating bear for a half hour. Actually, scratch that. If anybody wants to watch a bear masturbating for thirty minutes, they'd just tune into NBC at 11:35pm (STARTING THIS MARCH!!!!1!1!!1!).
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LATE NIGHT COMEDY TALK SHOWS ALL SUCK FUCKING BALLS ----- JIMMY FALLON, CARSON FUCKING DALY, JAY LENO, LETTERMAN - YEAH, I SAID IT, LETTERMAN FUCKING SUCKS A DISEASED DONKEY DICK. EVEN JON STEWART COMES ACROSS AS A PHONY ASSHOLE THESE DAYS. CONAN IS THE BEST OUT OF ALL OF THEM BUT HE NEEDS ANOTHER FORMAT. FUCK LATE NIGHT TALK.
i love you mk..best analysis of the whole thing ive read...
xoxox
The war isn't working.
Conan got SCREWED! He moved his whole family, staff, and band for what? Conan should take a break and take it to Fox. Though, Fox has no luck with late night. Leno is OLD and should be put out to pasture. I agree with the poster who said he's got pics of the NBC execs screwing goats. The pics must go back about 20 years. David Letterman is winning and laughing his ass off now. Remember, Johnny Carson screwed over Letterman. Carson knew NBC was going to go with Leno. Carson was a douche bag to Letterman the way he was to Joan Rivers. Now Letterman is getting the last laugh. Craig Fergusson is my fave, but I cannot stay up that late to watch him.
This picture was taken right after he made a sex tape with Paris Hilton.
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"I am the Devil, and I'm here to do the Devil's work"
Well on last night's Simpsons documentary, Conan said he would take a job that only paid him a dollar a year if the job relocated him to the Spanish countryside, allowed him to drink Spanish wine and his sole responsibility was to come up with sketches for C. Montgomery Burns on 'The Simpsons'. It'd be hilarious if he was able to do just that.
NBC totally bent him over and I hope he returns the favor. Fuckers. Team Conan!
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If love had a dick I would eff with it. But it doesn't (it has a no crotch like Barbie).
Coco - if you're out there, tell NBC to stick it. Take the job at FOX and be the King of Late Night. I'm not a fan of either Leno or Coco, just pissed off that he's being treated this way. He deserves better than second banana ON HIS OWN SHOW.
*disappointed*
I was actually looking forward to the Masturbating Bear Show.
*regrets clearing TiVo queue*
♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣ ♣
Memories of the year that lies behind us
Wishes for the new year yet to come
And it stands to reason that good friends in season
Make you feel that life has just begun
It would be a good move to take a vacation and watch the aftermath of this.
I mean, talk/interview shows only become headline material when this kind of shit happens.
Remember Rosie going mental couple years ago? Hasselcrack AND Rosie got a shitload of attention, just like Leno and Conan are getting now.
If Coco is smart, he will make people REALLY miss him and return to an eager public.
Final nail on the NBC coffin if Conan's show eclipses Leno and Jimmy Whatever...
bruised ego - check
fat wallet - check
do you really need anything else with a fat wallet?
Poor Conan. He waited patiently for 5 years to be handed the Tonight Show, which was his dream gig. I'm sure he would want to keep the Tonight Show status, but his ego must be bruised by NBC.
He needs to move back to NYC and go back to his underdog status. And drag Brian Stack, Brian McCann, and Kevin Dorff with him.
I think Jay Leno is a douche bag. TEAM CONAN!!!
i like leno and conan the same. i know people say leno isn't funny but i disagree. he's not drop down dead funny but i still like him. conan is cool too. i watched both at the old times but when they switched up the times i miss both for some reason. they should've just left things the way they were.
I am convinced that Jay Leno has pictures of NBC execs fucking goats or something. He should have been kicked to the curb years ago. He is not funny.
He's funny looking - too pale, the hair....
Good for Conan...he hired a good lawyer to work out all the scenarios before he took over The Tonight Show because he knew there would be some fuckery going on either way with NBC. I hope he does decide to move to Fox and not be played by the peacock suits who don't know what in the hell they're doing these days.
Hate Leno!!!
Leno wanted out of "The Tonight Show." Then he asked to come back and NBC gave him his own show. Now they're bumping Conan to please Leno - for what? Leno, because he's a fucking bitch, cost Networks millions and they want to keep him on board? Doesn't make any sense. Get that money Conan. GET IT!
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"The Count on Sesame Street is scarier and more captivating than those preening whack vamps from Twilight." DListed user Master Blaster 6/09/09 (So true!)
Follow me on Twitter @t_rex_arms
The closest I get to a late night talk show is to watch an interview segment with someone I find interesting, but still I feel compelled to say fuck Jay Leno.
This Ginge is not that funny, but he's way funnier and more charismatic than Jay Leno.
NBC is the dumbest network, I swear.
Remember when they canceled The Black Donnellys?
Remember when they canceled Kings?
And now... we'll all remember that these fuckers also pushed Conan away.
Keep it up, assholes.
Not even 30 Rock, Community or any of your reality shows will keep you alive if you keep going full retard on us.
@Centaurious
Even though Johnny wanted Letterman to succeed him, Leno did the smart thing- he courted all the affiliate stations and won them over. Thus, he pretty much left NBC with no choice but to put him on, because all of their NBC affiliates wanted Leno instead of Letterman.
Letterman was by far the better choice, but he kind of shot himself in the foot and assumed Johnny's wishes would be honored. He should have kissed some affiliate ass.
Conan is a cool guy and I know he'll be kind and considerate whatever he chooses to do but oh, my, the MONEY involved. I feel bad for both Conan and Jay.
Some NBC executive heads need to roll for this debacle.
http://www.jamaica-fact-fest.com
CBS is courting Conan as well. I hope he tell NBC to fuck off.
Submitted by Centaurious on Mon, 01/11/2010 - 10:18am.
Can anyone answer my question as to why Leno got that Carson job and not Letterman 18 years ago?
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A movie called The Late Shift was made about the situation. It was released in 2006.
They shafted Letterman after keeping him on the fence forever. Love Kathy Bates in this movie, she plays Leno’s agent.
We tried to like then Leno show. It was just boring.
"If Drinks Aren't Involved, Then Neither Am I."
Leno is awful...unfunny, pompous ass. Letterman should have had the Tonight Show years ago. Conan needs to walk. He deserves every penny of that $80 million for putting up with NBC's bullshit.
Oh Conan you poor bastard. You moved your whole family from one mansion on the east coast to another mansion on the west coast? and all for a paltry few million a year????!!! And your show isn't even that funny ..i.e. you're not doing that great of a job as your ratings indicate. And what do you get for all your "trouble"? Millions and millions for years to come if your bosses let you go. - do you know how many times this has happened to people in good ol' corporate America? Move their family across country and then get laid off. With a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of what NBC will pay you. STFU!
I remember the days when Corps kept their shit out of the media.
Coma Caca!
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Doesn't Wanda Sykes have a gig at FOX late night???
Anybody watch her?
And, Conan YOU GET THAT MONEY BITCH! But at 11pm I watch The Daily Show....
And I like Jimmy Fallon!
*runs away*
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I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
All this NBC brouhaha will be upstaged by Anderson Cooper pouting that CNN's gonna give Kathy Griffin 360.
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Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
I'm Team Chelsea as well. They need to make her show an hour and quit going to Ryan Seacrest after her show. It kills my giggles buzz.
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"I guess all you do, is lie back and think of England" Bear Grylls
Team Chelsea as well especially when she does her Dr. Lately skits. She blows them all out of the water.
I would like to see Michael K as a guest on her panel.
I don't believe in miracles. I depend on them.
Team Chelsea as well. She blows them all out of the water.
I would like to see Michael K as a guest on her panel.
I don't believe in miracles. I depend on them.
Submitted by kittycatastrophe on Mon, 01/11/2010 - 10:24am
So happy to share the link with you,can't say enough about my fur babies. They were from a wonderful no kill shelter. My kitty Kava is purring on my lap as I type this.
OT, still don't care. Bunch of rich bitches!
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Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today...
@BootsieBug : Off-topic
Thanks for the petfinder link. My mom is looking to adopt two older cats in the next few months after losing her cat of 18 years in December, I will pass it along to her.
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I am not a pussy.
Submitted by rukiddingme on Mon, 01/11/2010 - 9:43am.
If someone paid me $80 million to stay home, I'd happily do so.
www.theanimalrescuesite.com - Click everyday to help animals in shelters
www.petfinder.com - Enter your zip code & find pets available in your area for adoption.
Don't know if you are still here but I am happy to say that your siggy helped me find two fur fwends that I adore and love deeply!! So thanks to you.
OT, meh who cares.
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Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today...
Can anyone answer my question as to why Leno got that Carson job and not Letterman 18 years ago?
Thanks! :)
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"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think."
NBC is fucking with Conan, fucking bad, their execs did it with Letterman AND WITH THE SAME ASSHOLE... they didn't learn shit from that experience, and look how that worked for him.
Letterman, Craig and Kimmel, hell, even Ferenstein (who?), are pointing and laughing at NBC's failed night talkshow double out.
David Letterman must be enjoying this.
You can't blame Jay for not wanting to retire. I mean, he has to afford to keep buying $100,000+ cars.
If Leno's show is getting the ax, then shouldn't he disappear with it? Leno is royally screwing everyone. He's not even funny. I don't get it. I just don't get it!
Conan needs to compete with Leno, he needs to go ANYWHERE wheere he will be at the same time, he will crush Leno...
....But that’s vulgar and gross to me: exploding assholes, exploding brains. And Christian sites are vulgar to me, too. Michael K
What about Carson!
He TOTALLY went away, like Unibomber went away.
He didn't give Leno any shit.
Leno is a douche. Who does he think he is and why is NBC ruining their elite late night talk show history for this spade-chinned wop?
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"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think."
@Pleco and Few Words-I die-you are too funny for this early in the morning (7:12 my time)
Pleco-checked out your website-breathtakingly GORGEOUS!
"You still owe me $1200, shetbag"
Jay Leno will shit on anyone to get to the top, and always has. I would hate to have him as a friend.
Good for him for shopping around. His response sounds like he is a little full of himself. It all does depend on ratings, but I would probably have done the same thing.
So when is Jay retiring for realz? He is acting like Brett Favre!
CONAN HAS TO LEAVE!!
Conan, don't take those moth-eaten peacock crumbs!
Can you imagine how humiliating it would be for him to introduce the first night of his new 1 hour show...with Leno coming BEFORE HIM?
This is his time. He holds all the cards. His fans will follow him anywhere.
I'm seriously not watching ANYTHING on NBC again. Well, unless Conan leaves and Leno's ratings tank. Then I'll watch and laugh.
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"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think."
Team Chelsea Lately! Woot!
Chicks can rock late night too you mysogynists!!
Conan on Fox at 11pm makes total sense. His only competition at that hour is John Stewart.
So Conan and Jay are making more than 20 million a year when they get what...4-6 million viewers? While our favorite prime time shows are canceled for having 10 million viewers?
Good for him. Quit that bitch, and let Jay Leno take down the last remnants of the sinking ship that is NBC.
Conan should quit that shit in a way that gets him and his staffers the most money. They all relocated their families from NYC to L.A. only to be treated like shit by NBC when that 10PM talk show bullshit blew up in their faces as everyone predicted. Leno is to blame also, because dude made a year long show of retiring and months later un-retired to fill in the 10PM slot as a favor. Leno's ego is getting in the way of his doing the right thing and telling NBC, "I'm heading back to Retiree Villa, you idiots can sort this out without me."
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I am not a pussy.