Channing Tatum's Penis Looked Like This Once
Channing Tatum (or Carol O'Neal as I like to call him) now knows how every man who fucks Parasite Hilton without wrapping their penis in kryptonite first feels. Channing tells Details Magazine about the night his dick was burned by a pot of boiling water. When a penis burns, my no-no sheds a tear.
The peen burning accident occurred on the Scotland set of the movie The Eagle of the Ninth. Channing explained that it was colder than Snow Miser's dick there, so they would pour hot water into their suits to stay warm.
Channing said, "The only way to keep warm was by pouring a mix of boiling water and river water down your suit. We were finally done shooting for the day, and one of the crew guys asks if I want to warm up before I go. I'm like, Nah, I'm good. And then I thought, Why not? Thing is, he'd forgotten to dilute the kettle water. So he poured scalding water down my suit. And I was trying to pull the suit away from my body to somehow get away from the boiling water, and the more I pulled the suit away, the lower the water went. It just went straight down and pretty much burned the skin off the head of my dick."
Obviously, this crew member only gets hongray for chocha, because if it was one of our slut asses we would've calmly explained to Channing that an episode of Survivor taught us that the quickest way to heal a burn involves mouth saliva and ass juice.
And thankfully, Channing's wang no longer looks like the face of Fire Marshall Bill, "I'm good . . . now. Now my penis is fantastic! One hundred percent recovered. Put me back in the game, Coach."
• 
His looks are SO overrated. He has a nice body but a busted face. People always talk about how hot he is but I just don't see it.
well... I think Channing is actually a good actor. The voice is there, he's a little young (born 1980) so, in terms of developing his style and brand, hes not there yet. In no way am I comparing him to Pacino, but, just to make the point that even great actors turn in horrible performances. Every creative person needs to do what they do best, and sometimes, it takes a while to figure out exactly what that is.
He was great in " A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints"
A really thoughtful, sensitive movie—so, I think he'll be o.k. Unless he sells out and starts going exclusively for the money and those big empty Hollywood movies. If he does that, then he won't develop at all.
who? another day of news on nobodies
Channing Tatum (or Carol O'Neal as I like to call him)
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That wasn't not funny.
Also - if ever there is a time to utter the words: "You and me are done professionally!"....
♥ Threadkilla!
Did you have a nice time last night, WHORE?
My cousın once got hıs peen caught up ın hıs zıpper ın my bathroom when we were teenagers.
I felt hıs paın.
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http://www.myspace.com/triston
ask me how to subscribe for "Heaux Confessionals©", delivered to your inbox and other holes:
xadesmultimedia@gmail.com
Oh, thanks aquame. I was wondering just who this person is. I got G.I. Joe from Netflix and managed to watch about 20 minutes of it. Tatum is the worse actor I've seen in quite a while. He made that Wayans brother's performance look Oscar-worthy. Really pitiful!!
Also . . . he sounds kind of stupid!!
TeriAnn - this is not a Brange thread. LOL. I am sure you burned the same hole in your MAMS poster rubbing in your prives...
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1172613656
LMFAO at that nasty burned hole-in-the-hot dog main pic. in conjunction with this story.
sorry. couldn't help myself.
I guess Banana Jesus was mistaken for a plantain.
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"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think."
whaat the fuck ppl got to antarctica and survive they have hand warmers and feet warmers and 0 below jackets and shit now what the fuck were they suddenly transported to the dark ages.
Submitted by jazzfish_77 on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:45pm.
It looks like the big toe of that old guy on Discovery health.
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True story- I used to work with a guy who had blown his thumb and some fingers off with a firecracker so they amputated one of his big toes and sewed it on his hand as a thumb.
P.S. Your avie is what would happen if Joaquin Phoenix and the guy who played Stiffler procreated.
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ummm, Mug Shots? Before and After.
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Worked all week, it’s time to play
Gonna get a little bit Sideways...
Submitted by Plecostomus on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:25pm.
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:19pm.
could anyone please tell me how you can recognize a meth face?
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Just look at Lindsay Lohan.
Or this gallery of beauties:
http://www.drugfree.org/portal/drugissue/methresources/faces/photo_8.htm...
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These pictures always bugged the hell out of me. No doubt that's how you can look after doing hard drugs for a few months but those photos are obviously photoshopped! I find it hard to believe anyone said "hey let's take a before picture of you before you start meth binging and then come back in a few months so we can see how bad your face got fucked up."
Sorry, it's just this little thing that always got under my skin.
It looks like the big toe of that old guy on Discovery health. He had a blister that became gangrenous due to diabetes.
LOL @ jazzy!!!!!
See, your new avie is proof why Neil Patrick Harris should never get on that shiz.
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Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
that looks like a burnt finger with a hole with the fingernail should be. that said, i'm going to go throw up now.
Submitted by Plecostomus on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:36pm.
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:32pm.
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Yep.
Meth's a helluva drug.
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Mmmm-hmmmm!
@ GTL : Always happy to amuse! Hope things are better for you now.
:D
OnT: Soooo....why DOES Channing Tatum suddenly look so old?
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Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
@Plecy
Thanks for the hilarious googlesite. As always a masterpiece!!!
Had a dramatically "intense" weekend, only thing that brought a chuckle and smile to my face :-)
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"My heart will be unbroken, it will open up for everyone but you...
Believe me I can live without when out from under"
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:32pm.
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Yep.
Meth's a helluva drug.
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Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
Submitted by Plecostomus on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:25pm.
Holy crap, that was shocking!
Who the heck eats charbroiled franks with avocado?!?!
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"My heart will be unbroken, it will open up for everyone but you...
Believe me I can live without when out from under"
Submitted by BRADIFUL BITCH on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:06pm.
I DO NOW SUGAROO!
And ima pretty sure this is what Teri Bo Beri's tittay nipples look like after watching "Tomb Raider" for the billionth time.
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LMFAO *puts vaseline on nips*
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"poor jacko, trying to struggle thru this world with one eye and the womenz just keep fucking his shit UP!" snowpiece 11/25/09
Submitted by MickeyHolland on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:19pm.
could anyone please tell me how you can recognize a meth face?
---------------------------
Just look at Lindsay Lohan.
Or this gallery of beauties:
http://www.drugfree.org/portal/drugissue/methresources/faces/photo_8.htm...
=========================
Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
Submitted by SpiceDong on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:00pm.
Submitted by KD on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:56pm.
My theory is that if you are male, have 6pk abs and a not completely busted face, you can make it in Hollywood. I'll have to see if I can get someone to test that theory for me.
8====================> (_*_)
Your theory has been tested and confirmed over and over with almost every leading man coming out of Hollywood these days. Hot bodies with ugly or so so faces are the calling card of a leading man nowadays from Brad Pitt to Vin Diesel and beyond.
Matt Keeslar never made it big... and he was in a couple of good movies, but his looks didn't get him very far.
As undutch as this may sound: in my forty some years of living I've never done drugs, so could anyone please tell me how you can recognize a meth face?
(That picture is beyond disgusting, by the way.)
Submitted by TeriAnn on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:02pm.
I'm pretty sure that's how most of your vibrators look.
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Now, while I think TeriAnn is certifiable, I have her give her credit for a fucking funny comment!
*golf claps*
He doesn't do anything for me...hillbilly or not
"motherfucker, I lick pits for a living." Submitted by suckandfuck 12/14/2009 - 3:05pm.
No need to get so defensive!!!!
I prefer my weiners barbequed, not boiled.
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Shiitake happens...
Submitted by BRADIFUL BITCH on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:06pm.
I DO NOW SUGAROO!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
ROFLMAO! ♥
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Never step into the path of a single woman and the last kielbasa sausage, it is very dangerous. That is dinner and a date all in one! - urmomma
I DO NOW SUGAROO!
And ima pretty sure this is what Teri Bo Beri's tittay nipples look like after watching "Tomb Raider" for the billionth time.
/\
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
TeriAnn, are you a masochist? Does Bradi know you're here?
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Never step into the path of a single woman and the last kielbasa sausage, it is very dangerous. That is dinner and a date all in one! - urmomma
Submitted by TeriAnn on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 1:02pm.
What are you doing here? This isn't a Brange thread. Scram, scoot, begone!
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"I'm not an asshole. I'm just drawn that way." --BK
I'm pretty sure that's how most of your vibrators look.
Submitted by KD on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:56pm.
My theory is that if you are male, have 6pk abs and a not completely busted face, you can make it in Hollywood. I'll have to see if I can get someone to test that theory for me.
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that pretty much sums up Matthew McConaughey's career.
Submitted by KD on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:56pm.
My theory is that if you are male, have 6pk abs and a not completely busted face, you can make it in Hollywood. I'll have to see if I can get someone to test that theory for me.
8====================> (_*_)
Your theory has been tested and confirmed over and over with almost every leading man coming out of Hollywood these days. Hot bodies with ugly or so so faces are the calling card of a leading man nowadays from Brad Pitt to Vin Diesel and beyond.
"Honey, we're all lesbians when the right man is not around." - Karen Walker
Submitted by Jill-The-Ripper on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:21pm.
OMFG - eeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwww!
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"I'm not an asshole. I'm just drawn that way." --BK
oh ok , got it thanks!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown
Ugh, box of rocks.
He ruined G.I. Joe.
Now he's in a new movie by the same people who did "The Notebook", I saw a preview and conclusion, it's "The Notebook: STIIIILLLLLLL?"
/\
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you.
I don't even have a dick, and that story made me cringe. Dude's got nice muscles, but the face is meh.
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"I'm not an asshole. I'm just drawn that way." --BK
Submitted by music lover on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:51pm.
he's like the male equivalent of Megan Fox. why is he famous again?
he's not even that hot.
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My theory is that if you are male, have 6pk abs and a not completely busted face, you can make it in Hollywood. I'll have to see if I can get someone to test that theory for me.
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:51pm.
who is Carol O'Neal?
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carol channing and tatum o'neal = carol o'neal
mk is always so clever
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:51pm.
who is Carol O'Neal?
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Shhh that's the password.
(Carol) Channing Tatum (O'Neal)
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Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
Submitted by snowpiece on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:51pm.
who is Carol O'Neal?
8====================> (_*_)
Carol Channing + Tatum O'Neal
"Honey, we're all lesbians when the right man is not around." - Karen Walker
who is Carol O'Neal?
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
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Never step into the path of a single woman and the last kielbasa sausage, it is very dangerous. That is dinner and a date all in one! - urmomma
he's like the male equivalent of Megan Fox. why is he famous again?
he's not even that hot.
Submitted by KD on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:41pm.
Submitted by aquame on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:37pm.
I bet his reaction to this scalding dick incident was the ONLY time you'd ever see him show any emotion. The dude CANNOT act.
8====================> (_*_)
I totally agree...but he can dance and shake it like the best of them LOL...after all he used to be a stripper/exotic dancer...I think he is no stranger to dick but he is married to his female co-star in Step-Up now. They are trying to build him up as this action hero / romantic lead these days, but that's not really his strength despite his body. He is many many acting classes away from being convincing in any role but the thug who can dance.
"Honey, we're all lesbians when the right man is not around." - Karen Walker
Submitted by loozer on Tue, 01/12/2010 - 12:28pm.
Vintage Channing:
http://rantsthoughtsmerde.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/channing_tatum14.j...
...Wow, he's aging really badly. He's going to be the next Val Kilmer.