Thursday, January 14th 2010
Noah Cyrus Brushes Her Teeth With A Bottle Of Jack
Noah Cyrus is back fresh from her YouTube performance of Smack That last month! This time Noah is trying to destroy our souls by lip-synching to Kesha's (a broke bitch doesn't deserve a dollar sign) Tik Tok. This will violate all your senses. Keep our tab open!
Speaking of canes, what's the status on Billy Cyrus getting caned for bringing this fuckery upon us?
via Lainey Gossip
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I thought it was cute, too. The lyrics to the song are not even half as suggestive as a lot of the music out there, she was fully clothed, and I think alot of the "moves" she as doing in the video were quite clever. If she choreographed it herself, that's awesome... it shows she does have some talent; and even if she didn't, I think it was great that he (her sibling?) took the time out to play with her. Yes, I concede that the "Smack That" vid was a bit tasteless, but, really, how many of us as a child belted out "I wanna Sex You Up", "The Humpty Dance" or even Sir-Mix-Alot's "I Like Big Butts"? And you know most of you would have recorded it if you had the means to and tried to show everyone! WHere is the video that was floating around out there of the moms that filmed a dirty dancing/ grinding contest with their 5-9 year olds? Now, THAT was shocking and outrageous!
"Small and broken..... but still good..... mostly...."
That is something that I would have done in the bathroom mirror using my brush as a microphone. Thank god there isn't a video of that shit floating around.
The only good thing about this being made public is the fact that Noah will (hopefully) die of embarrassment of it when she's in her teens...
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On Angelina Jolie... If I want something with a big shiny forehead and throbbing vein, I'll play with my pecker...
jazzfish_77
she's kinda funny looking
i dont see the big deal. i did this shit all the time with my sister when we were8.
thats kinda adorable
LOOKIT!!!! a baby cunt in the wild!!!! SHhh...you don't wanna spook it....if we're luck we may see billy goat cyrus come out and mate with it!!! Get your cameras ready!!!
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"Escandalo! Okay, I'm totally making shit up." ~ M.K. 08/31/09
You know she's gonna be knocked up by that dude by 12. And why the hell does she stick her fat tongue out every time there's an L in the song? And why does she keep STOPPING? It's like someone hit PAUSE on her head.
The kid is fug and fame hungry. But it has to be said that in 1984 I was doing the same in my bedroom to Like a Virgin by Vadge. The only thing was we had no such thing as Youtube and you know what, I think that was probably for the best.
The Cyrus family is the most classless, whorey, famehungry family in Hollywood. This was the kid that of course dressed as a ho for a Halloween party. And she is the little sister of tarty Miley.
This is what I visit DListed for. I mean, Phoebe Price is Meryl Streep compared to this. And I thought Ali Lohan was to die for she was so pathetic. I bet Noah gets to the "clinic" before Ali to have "things taken care of".
Great. A 9 year old singing about taking shots of Jack and hooking up with guys. What world class parents this one has. All the money in the world can't replace having a normal childhood with loving parents.
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AUNT HARRIET, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?? Who let my 80 year-old great-aunt get her hands on a pair of $6.99 Walgreens sunglasses and a Skype? Bastards.
God is that creepy...what is the matter with that family...so nasty and low class.
Kids will be kids and will "play". If she wants to make her own little "private" video, I don't think that is so bad. But when it gets posted online, it just comes across as creepy, in incredible bad judgment, and a reflection of terrible, neglectful parenting.
I'm awfully open-minded -- but this is too much. Put a muzzle on this kid and her parents! What in the world will she be up to in just a couple of years if this is the stuff she is online with?
Submitted by nunya_bizness on Thu, 01/14/2010 - 9:04pm.
I hate Kesha with a fiery passion. Her only redeeming factor is her hot brother.
http://gawker.com/5448068/meet-kehas-brother-investigative-journalist
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Woah, he is cute. Ke$ha isn't. Apparently her bro got all the looks. Like the Gyllenhaals.
She's hideous. Seriously, she's one of the ugliest kids I've ever seen. I don't think Miley is pretty but she isn't as fug as Noah. Yikes.
Submitted by nunya_bizness on Thu, 01/14/2010 - 9:04pm.
Would.hit.that
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"Who in the fuck is tila tequila? Is she a stripper?...That's her? Yeah, that's a stripper, son, I don't give a shit what you say." ShitMyDadSays on Facebook
I see this as Suri Cruise in the future, parents need to at least oversee their children's activities, I not one for helocopter parents but you need to know what your children are doing especially when it being posted so the world can see it!
_ Oh Sugar!_
(\/)
(O.o)
(>"<)
(_^_)
Honestly, paedophiles never had it so easy... Even with an ugly child like this one. Why is her tongue licking her upper no-lip every time the letter L is 'lip synched'?
And I bet that retard behind her is her cousin slash future husband.
I hate Kesha with a fiery passion. Her only redeeming factor is her hot brother.
http://gawker.com/5448068/meet-kehas-brother-investigative-journalist
This video makes me wanna dance in my underwear in my bedroom lol
www.myspace.com/vienna_rossi
Who is super homo behind her?
Ahh, another Jamie Lynn Spears in the making. How old is this kid? 10? Another six years and she'll be knocked up and we won't have to hear about her anymore.
I need an acid bath. Seeing that fat little underage slug tongue every time she pronounces an "L" is making me want to puke.
Little girl, start saving for your therapy with your allowance money.
I actually think this is cute. Little girl having fun with prob one of her sibs friends just goofing around. It shouldn't have been made public, however. This is a kid!
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Personally, I think Steven is just one of those natural crackheads. You know, those hos who act strung out, but aren't. They are primarily known as "Born-Again Christians." -- MK
Awwwww i thought it was cute...she's super adorable haha.
www.myspace.com/vienna_rossi
I say let's string up Billy Ray and his cousin-wife like pinatas and beat the shit out of them for this fuckery & their ugly spawn.
Just a thought.
I never forget a face, but in your case, I'll be glad to make an exception- Groucho Marx
aaarrrgh NOT CUTE!! wtf with the "HELLO" huh??! Yeah HELLO what up with you lil kid. I've always been a "I wont talk crap about the children" but this year it's gonna change that thought!
Coma Caca!
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Oh, Fuck! Lady GaGa got herself some fucking competition cause that's as high on the talent scale that this little bitch is going to get.
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Hello Kitty Ho, except it only works if you're a good-looking, talented kid. Noah Cyrus, well look at her.
Submitted by Claire_Bear on Thu, 01/14/2010 - 7:47pm.
Hard liquor and pills by 11. Coke and Sex by 12. Rehab by 13.
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AH yes, The Drew Barrymore Handbook on how to fail upwards in Hollywood.
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I'm tired, I'm wasted, I love you darling.
Hard liquor and pills by 11. Coke and Sex by 12. Rehab by 13.
Submitted by Anonymous Q on Thu, 01/14/2010 - 6:45pm.
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She did do voice acting from Ponyo. So there's that. But your theory's probably right.
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Fer sure maybe, fer sure not, fer sure eh, fer sure bomb...
Submitted by dreamhypnotique on Mon, 06/15/2009
It's like trying to put Herpes in its place, when you're syphilis.
Ugh....oh,I mean...HOW CUTE!!!
What a little toad. ZERO charasma, Dave!
The little dweeb in the background has more "it" than Lil' Mizz Cyrus.
She's like Shamie Lynn but only WORSE.
The fact that the latest fug spawn of the Cyrus' got high profile work (voice work on Ponyo) is proof positive that the Cyrus family has traded their souls to the devil. How else could you explain how Billy Ray, Miley, that ugly son of his wife Trace, could have any type of musical success.
Jack and plaque don't mix. Use it as a mouthwash and then swallow.
If Billy Ray had any decency he would lock up that young child before he has another prostitot on his hands.
WTF was that?? Two questions-
A) who is the creepy queen dancing in the background?
B) why is this brat dancing in what appears to be a basement? Is she gonna be Basement Baby #2? If so, bitch needs to pick up her game.
That nail is trying to file chris brown charges on me I hit it so hard
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"It may just be me, but I think TeriAnn is actually Maddox."
-Clarisse
http://www.crazydaysandnights.net/2010/01/reader-photos.html
@Genny18:
I think you hit the nail on the head. She's ignored so she acts out...her parents hired a nice paid pal/babysitter for her to hang out with so she'd stay out of everyone's face.
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I am not a pussy.
Does Noah even live with her parents? Why is she spending time making music videos with 20 yo dancers?
I'm gonna grow a heart for a minute, then it'll retreat back to the cold, dark, cobwebbed dungeon where it belongs.
She's what 10? She obviously gets no attention because she hasn't made any money for the Cyrus bunch. This is her only way of trying. I can't blame her for that.
First I had wondered who sang that song that I hear on the radio all the time yet the DJ's never tell who sings the songs. Second... Noah is a natural performer like her sister. My 9 yr old would never act like that but others do. What's the big deal?
Who lets their kid act like this??? Who??? Call CPS STAT!!!
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I'm countin' on Jesus at this point.
I made it to 27 seconds then I wanted to give her to a Russian orphanage. As for the original song, it sucks. I mean really sucks like a whore with three rotten teeth... really bad.
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Bitch, Don't You Ever!
I have a feeling that everyone ignores Noah and this is her way of getting some attention. Also that beard is prolly a hired gay so she can have someone to make her feel special and hang out with.
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"It may just be me, but I think TeriAnn is actually Maddox."
-Clarisse
http://www.crazydaysandnights.net/2010/01/reader-photos.html
I tried to listen to Kesha just to see what was up, she's hype like I thought;I couldn't listen to 30 seconds of that chick. Noah Cyrus will be a strung out mess before her Sweet 16, trust.
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I am not a pussy.
Who is this like 20 year old guy hanging out with her? CREEPY. WEIRD.
Submitted by Ms. Caligula on Thu, 01/14/2010 - 5:42pm.
She’s a very, um, unfortunate looking child.
Oh, fuck it. She looks like the banjo player from Deliverance
BWAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA! You NAILED it!!!
"Jesus and God really need to file a joint lawsuit against bitches for dragging their good names into unadulterated fuckery!" MK 2/15/09
If she was my kid, I would beat her. All the time. With a hairbrush. And a hanger. And a wooden spoon. Then, I would make her a PBJ sammich, put her to bed, and start it all over again the next day.
I'm more concerned with the attention-whoring douche in the background who looks much too old to be doing lip synching videos with a child Noah's age.