New Couple Alert?
Lindsay Lohan has accepted Richard Lugner's invitation to be his date to the Vienna Opera Ball in Austria next month. The 77-year-old socialite (I'm talking about Richard) selects a delicate flower of Hollywood to be his date to the ball every year. Richard's past escorts reads like a who's who of the CDC: Pamela Anderson, Nicollette Sheridan, Carmen Electra and Wonky McValtrex.
Richard Lugner chose LiLo this year, because IN THIS ECONOMY, she's all he could afford. LiLo also better keep a flask of the sweet nectar in her clutch, because Richard said that there will be mineral water instead of champagne in their box.
After LiLo tells everyone at the opera that it was so good she almost pissed her pants, they will go back to Richard's hotel room and feast on mineral water and strawberries. Then LiLo will excuse herself to use the bathroom. When she starts to take too long, Richard will barge in on her and find her doing something suspicious. Richard will accuse her of fucking the white bitch with her nostrils, but LiLo will start screaming about how she was just flossing the strawberry seeds out of her teeth! Wait, is that how the movie went?
via HuffPo
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I'm surprised other countries still let her inside their borders. It would take no less than a mandate from the World Health Organization before I would agree to be in a room and breathe the same air as this whore.
Is Ali too old for human trafficking? I wonder if Dina's thought of that yet?
Ick. Nast.
Oh and work has decided I should no longer have access to Dlisted. F you work.
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"I truly don't like you as a person. Can't one human being not like another human being? Can't we all just not get along?"
She is such a trashy whore. I'm supprised her pussy hasn't showed up on Yelp yet. She'd get plenty of reviews. I'd give it one star.
Old fart better lock his medicine cabinet when she comes over.
Submitted by Tigerlilly on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 6:49pm.
Lilo need to stick an Alum covered lemon wedge up her asshole before this date cuz you know no matter how much meat that old geezer was workin' with in his youth, he's got a dessicated bleached out lookin' old man Slim Jim dick, a'quiverin' from a fist full of internet Viagra to maintain his semi-erection, and God knows her snatch is about as tight as that Duggar broad's is...Yep, between the cocaine fueled grinding of her teeth and her extra lax fire cooch, the only orifices that are both semi-safe (trippled bagged and dude don't have that much longer to live, so blisters schmisters...) and possibly tight enough to get the old perv off are her artificially puckered up asshole and her ear....(we don't even need to discuss her nostrils for obvious reasons)
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EGGSACTLY what I'm talking about!
Submitted by Manimal5 on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 9:54pm.
I'm sure the kneepad leggings will come in handy for this one.
Maybe Dina can sell off Ali to some wealthy foreigner!!
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*sock monkey hugs & smooches* Hi, Manimal! Dina will sell her "young" to anybody willing to pay full price.
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
Submitted by Sock-Monkey on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 9:50pm.
Attention Whore = Willing to do a line or two off a withered dick.
I'm sure the kneepad leggings will come in handy for this one.
Maybe Dina can sell off Ali to some wealthy foreigner!!
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Submitted by Manimal5 on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 9:05pm.
Where's Roman Polanski when you need him?
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Pssht...Hohan is too old for him and her lil' siter is too old looking for him....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Attention Whore = Willing to do a line or two off a withered dick.
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That lil' lint bastid will be back within the hour snorting your Borax with a rolled up dollar bill. Trust....TigerLilly 10.24.2008
If he hasn't croaked by next year, he should invite either Aubrey O'Day, Jordan or that Jodie Marsh thing.
That should finish the old perv off.
btw Hohan will never change...she would probably steal from the babies and orphans in Haiti given the chance...she is just a coke whore, spoiled slut....with no talent and no hope because of idiots like this who want to keep her in the public eye...
hope the old geezer ups his Valtrex and antibiotic prescriptions for this "hot" date...
Submitted by SpiceDong on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 6:05pm.
@ super martian r... on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 5:33pm.
Haiti has too many problems right now...the last thing they need is some deprived crackhead nymphomaniac loose amidst their chaos stealing whatever she can get.
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Lol, didn't consider that one. Someone needs to just stick her on a deserted island then with some coconut trees that make her shit all day. And just leave her there forever. Hehe.
Where's Roman Polanski when you need him?
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That guy really has something for the skanks.
I thought it was Pauly Shore at first!
Submitted by Dr. Cornelia J.... on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 8:37pm.
At his age, an aggressive case of gonorrhea can be extremely dangerous. Is that really how he wants to die?
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Judging from his recent guest list...YES....
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
His earlier guests included Harry Belafonte, Sophia Loren, Grace Jones, and Joan Collins. He just started inviting trash recently, perhaps b/c they are the most popular nowadays?? Sad, really. :( Expect him to invite one of the KardASSians or Twatt and his Plastic Covered Twitt next year.
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At his age, an aggressive case of gonorrhea can be extremely dangerous. Is that really how he wants to die?
The stupid bitch must have thought that she was going to Vienna West Virginia. I am being nice to even mention that she knew that Vienna West Virginia even exists.
I feel sorry for the Austrians. This will be the last time Richard Lugner's is ever allowed in the Opera house.
I wonder if she will whip up a special pair of Vienna Opera Ball leggings to wear to this gala?
"Well, it is very nice to meet ya'll motherfuckers an' ho's." Shanaynay (Shane Dawson)
Lilo need to stick an Alum covered lemon wedge up her asshole before this date cuz you know no matter how much meat that old geezer was workin' with in his youth, he's got a dessicated bleached out lookin' old man Slim Jim dick, a'quiverin' from a fist full of internet Viagra to maintain his semi-erection, and God knows her snatch is about as tight as that Duggar broad's is...Yep, between the cocaine fueled grinding of her teeth and her extra lax fire cooch, the only orifices that are both semi-safe (trippled bagged and dude don't have that much longer to live, so blisters schmisters...) and possibly tight enough to get the old perv off are her artificially puckered up asshole and her ear....(we don't even need to discuss her nostrils for obvious reasons)
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Lohan as an invited guest to a ritzy Viennese bash?
Three words: "ROB me Amadeus"
I thought the only opera LiLo knew was "Fellatio".
I never forget a face, but in your case, I'll be glad to make an exception- Groucho Marx
According to Wikipedia's article on RL:
"While Lügner (with an umlaut) is a German word meaning "liar", the name of the family is Lugner (without an umlaut)."
Methinks that he dropped his umlaut on purpose.
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"I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity." E.A. Poe.
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Submitted by mike on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 5:51pm.
This is really the most pathetic of choices. He should have had the Lindsey of '08, when her slide had just begun.
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Maybe there's a clingon factor...he waits to see if they can REALLY cling to it...
♥ Threadkilla!
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them. ~ Joseph Heller
@ super martian r... on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 5:33pm.
Haiti has too many problems right now...the last thing they need is some deprived crackhead nymphomaniac loose amidst their chaos stealing whatever she can get.
8====================> (_*_)
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"Your spunk is funkyyyy!" - Samantha Jones
He cums dust and she queefs coke. A match made in heaven.
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I ALMOST threw up my grilled cheese sandwich but with Jesus in your life, you can overcome anything. - boobxqueen on Octomom's Star cover
I hope he sticks his old dick in the mashed potatoes
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"One Punch, One Punch!"
Ronnie 2, Townies 0
This guy has a history of associating with sluts & whores, so taking BLOWhan somehow seems totally appropriate...
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"I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don't like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa." - Brit's Tits
Submitted by angel_i on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 5:44pm.
To scandalize his "class" mates, of course!
8====================> (_*_)
BINGO.
The iddle rich love to make fun of trashy low-class hos...they bring the entertainment to a somewhat boring and stiffling event.
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"Your spunk is funkyyyy!" - Samantha Jones
I think the old coot just drags the worst out of Hollywood to secretly make fun of these bitches and attract publicity since this type of events benefit from whatever press they can get and LiLo still brings the paps to the yard --for the wrong reasons but still!
I just hope the wrinkly parrot (Richard) insured all his shit because LiLo will rob him blind at the very first chance she gets.
And being a paid escort for an old rich man is somewhat a step up in Lohan's current career path ...I thought that by now she'd be reduced to sell BJ's for $10 on Santa Monica Blvd.
8====================> (_*_)
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"Your spunk is funkyyyy!" - Samantha Jones
This is really the most pathetic of choices. He should have had the Lindsey of '08, when her slide had just begun.
arrrrgh DIRTY!! NASTAYYYYY
Coma Caca!
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Submitted by beakers bitch on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 5:33pm.
Why does he always pick the trashiest, cokewhoriest celebs to take to the Vienna Opera Ball.
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You know - when I think of this in a Dangerous Liaisons kinda way it almost answers itself.
To scandalize his "class" mates, of course!
♥ Threadkilla!
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them. ~ Joseph Heller
Isnt this the same affair where they threw shit at Paris Shillton? I am laughing reading how Lindsay is so changed since she was in India, yeah 'cause she was there all of what, 4-5 days? That bitch wont change.
These bitches are sooo stupid. This man always picks the biggest losers to be his "date". Lindsay Lohan is definitely a loser.
"Life is tough, but it's tougher when you're stupid." -John Wayne
"Ignorance is curable, but stupidity is forever." -Gary Cryan
U know it's bad when you're a downgrade from Wonky McV!!!
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown
I like LiLo, but how much is she getting paid for this "date"?
Submitted by beakers bitch on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 5:33pm.
I, too, wonder why the hosts of the Vienna Opera Ball allows him to bring such trash to their event.
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"I became insane with long intervals of horrible sanity." E.A. Poe.
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We should force LiLo to go live in Haiti for 6 months with no outside help and no access to any money and then see what emerges after it. She'll be a whole new person, maybe. Ain't shit else gonna save her ass until she realizes what a lucky fuck in life she really is. There are people dying in the world who have NO ONE and no money and just nothing and this bitch right here can get all the help she wants (and people do care about her regardless of what her shallow stupid vapid selfish self believes.. just because *everyone* has to have their own story) and she still rejects it. Fuck her. Let her live a real life of poverty and shit for a while and then she can see the real world, maybe.
Why does he always pick the trashiest, cokewhoriest celebs to take to the Vienna Opera Ball. Like opera aficionados are gonna wanna party with these hos and converse about....tanning and Valtrex.
Submitted by Soultonic on Wed, 01/20/2010 - 5:27pm.
Oh Lilo..I still haven't recovered from your India trip and now this.
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O - I do love clicking into stories this way...and finding THIS, no less:
Richard Lugner chose LiLo this year, because IN THIS ECONOMY, she's all he could afford.
LMAO!
♥ Threadkilla!
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them. ~ Joseph Heller
Lindsay Lohan wouldn't know opera from a rail on a mirror. Dumb whore.
better hose down the hotel room
dirty whore meets dirty old man
match made in cesspool heaven
Who's Who of the CDC! Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Oh Lilo..I still haven't recovered from your India trip and now this. You're so full of surprises Lilo; who knew you loved the opera! Figaro, figaro, fi-ga-roooo!
Yuck. I hope HE uses protection.
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Douchechill!