BABY JESUS' PEEN (But Just Try To Ignore Vadge's Face)
Remember that photo shoot Vadge did for W Magazine? The one where she first met Baby Jesus and lured him into her manger? Well, this is a raw outtake from the shoot. Now you know why Vadge owns major stock in Photoshop, because without it she looks like she lives in a gingerbread house and tricks small children into coming inside so she can eat them. Instead of throwing her in the oven, we want to throw ourselves in.
But just splash some holy water at her and direct your eyes towards Jesus' penis. My abuelita is going to slap with a chankla in the mouth for that last part.
After the jump is Baby Jesus completely nekkid from the neck down (because he has no head). Jesus' dick is not something that'll cause you drop to your knees and make the sign of the cross, but it'll do. JUMP!
And let's get up close and personal. I'm sure that by now his peen is tattooed with "Property of Vadge."
If for some reason Baby Jesus' naked wang is making your genitals wail in excitement, this up close picture of the Crypt Keeper will shut them up.
It will also make me you want to run to the nearest church and beg for forgiveness. I'll meet you at the altar.