ESCANDALO: Gael Garcia Bernal Isn't Sure If He's The Father
Last year, adorable elf people Gael Garcia Bernal and Dolores Fonzi welcomed a baby son named Lazaro into this cruel, heartless world. You would think that a love affair between two magical elves would be filled with rainbows and empanadas, but according to TVyNovelas (via Guanabee) all is not well. Some source is saying that Gael has dumped Dolores and is accusing her of doing ho shit in the first degree.
Gael is about to summon the Maury gods, because he's not sure if baby Lazaro is his or not. Gael has been hearing that Dolores fucked around with film director Luis Ortega right before she got a case of the babies. So there's a chance that Luis' sperm made baby Lazaro.
While reading this scandalous shit, I felt like I was lying on my abuelita's bed watching one of her precious novelas. I was about to speak out, but remembered if I open my mouth during one of her favorites stories I'll get a slap in the teefs from her ring-covered hand.
And if this plays out like one of my abuelita's novelas, then Lazaro will turn out to be the switched baby of Dolores' long-lost evil twin sister who lives in a trailer at the carnival.



OOHHH love paternity dramas. Maury rules.
Good boobs:)
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Celebrity News
Her boobies aren't even all that.
Oh and we all know Gael is on the shorter side (still like him) but apparently Dolores is 5'2 1/2"...that's pretty normal. I wouldn't say she comes from the land of the elf people.
Submitted by Hekki on Mon, 02/01/2010 - 11:17pm.
Submitted by Madam Pince: "Call me biased, but I have a real problem with men who pull the "I'm not the father" trick when things go south with the mother."
That makes me CRAZY. Those are the men who are cheaters, too.
I agree with that. But let's be neutral here,sometimes women ARE the assholes in relationships. I really like Gael, but I didn't even know he was dating this chick let alone having a baby with her. So, I really don't know any details at all about this and can't make a guess as to who's likely telling the truth. The Eddie Murphy/Meleanie Brown thing was another story. From all the media exposure and her absolute willingness to have a test, it seemed (and turned out to be) that he was the kind of guy you were describing.
Now he can marry me.
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http://evolutionflashback.blogspot.com
Wasn't he in the overrated snoozefest, BABEL?
The parts I remember, in between naps, he was the one who gets stopped at the border with Pitt/Blanchett's kids. Their maid brought them down so she wouldn't miss a family member's (her daughter?) wedding w/ a reception that lasted, like, 3 days.
I don't know the chickie, but I think she's trying to kill us all with her murderous glare.
Who are these people?
oh, Gael, I will have your babies!!
so this is a recent photo? It looks like it should have circa 1973 polaroid edges.
look at these fucking hipsters.
I'm sorry, I don't know who these hos are, but the first thing that popped into my head when I saw the pic was latfh.com
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is this real life?
why is this happening to me?
is this going to be forever...
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"I'm gonna end up back in the gutter, sucking meth for cock." - drunk Naomi in Still Waiting...
he's kinda creepy in "I'm with Lucy" but it's a orgasmy-sexy-creepy. btw, it also stars Henry Thomas (E.T. boy all grown-up-ish sexy).
Submitted by Madam Pince: "Call me biased, but I have a real problem with men who pull the "I'm not the father" trick when things go south with the mother."
That makes me CRAZY. Those are the men who are cheaters, too.
Maybe they should get that loco astrology guy from the Novelas to predict if he's the father or not!!
Viva Novella!!
I love MK...I want to get arrested just so I can hear the judge charge me with doing "ho shit in the first degree!"
Call me biased, but I have a real problem with men who pull the "I'm not the father" trick when things go south with the mother.
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"Something in the pipe ain't smoky.”
I remember back when I was kid and making ANY noise during one of mom's soaps was signing your own death warrant.
Oh, and tiny cutie should call Maury for the DNA test. That would make great entertainment.
"Well, it is very nice to meet ya'll motherfuckers an' ho's." Shanaynay (Shane Dawson)
that really sucks for him.
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Let's bungle in the jungle - well, that's all right by me
I'm a tiger when I want love,
but I'm a snake if we disagree.
- Jethro Tull
Tiny people be cute and all but they like the Tiger equivolent to Chinese food for y'all...an hour later, you're hungry again...
But tiny people LURVE is cute and tiny people LURVE gone bad hurts my tiger heart....(shh, no it doesn't...I secretly think it's hilarious)...
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Sorry, Roger, you are tiger now...
Wasn't he just recently photographed sucking face with my favorite bitchcuntslut, Kate Hudson?
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Submitted by Stoney on Wed, 01/27/2010 - 5:42pm.
This site should be fun only. The petty shit fucks up my buzz.
Submitted by Mother Superior on Mon, 02/01/2010 - 6:30pm.
And what shall we all say to the babeh???
Everybody cheats.
Y tu mama tambien! :D
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Oh MS you are the best!! That made me LOL. will be giggling about it tomorrow as well.
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tu puta madre
Ughh I totally hallucinated Gael when I was young as my friend used to date him. He was much cuter back then. He is indeed short but so was my friend. Now that I think about it, she must be secretly rejoicing...
Lmao at the last paragraph
>> Submitted by Plecostomus on Mon, 02/01/2010 - 5:24pm.
Guess Bernal fell for yet another Fonzi scheme.
ba-DOOM-TSSHHHH!!! Lovesit!
I would do him six ways to Sunday. He's just my size, and just my type.
"And if this plays out like one of my abuelita's novelas, then Lazaro will turn out to be the switched baby of Dolores' long-lost evil twin sister who lives in a trailer at the carnival."
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LOL, MK! Telemundo rules. I used to watch the stories all the time and I don't even speak Spanish...you could totally figure it out!
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"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think."
And what shall we all say to the babeh???
Everybody cheats.
Y tu mama tambien! :D
who are they? never saw them before.
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The McCanns Did It
Submitted by RainbowBrite on Mon, 02/01/2010 - 6:03pm.
VENTANEANDO!!!! HAHAHAHHAAHAH OMG!!
I used to watch that, now I only get ventaneando america...have no idea when it's on. But now I don't even know who they are talking about so what's the point?
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tu puta madre
Oh look. He has Jack Palance Nose. He needs to make babies with Jennifer Lopez who has the female version.
I grew up seeing him as a kid in Telenovelas.
Never found him hot, but I saw him a couple of years ago in London and invited me and a group of my friends to see him in this play he was part of.
The play was forgettable, but he was kind of cute and funny in person.
And as for the name Lazaro, a kid in 2nd grade had that name. That's the only time I've met one with that name...in Mexico... so who knows..it's very old school. But I think they named him that to be "indie" and "cool"..ugh
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tu puta madre
provy it's way better than YTM
about dog fights and gangsters
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown
My aunt would always watch tele novelas. Even though I didn't know what the hell was going on, there's a;ways a whore, a maid (usually evil and scheming), a conniving boss (that was usually sleeping with an employee's wife, and a baby who's parentage couldn't be confirmed.
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Chris Brown needs to like, wow, take that stupid ass bow tie and shove it down his throat. It's like, wow. WOW. --MK 8/31/09
Damn, that is Escandaloso MK! I love this hot man, too bad he's a tiny human, but he is a good actor. Bwahaha, don't mess with an abuelita and her novelas or su show, Ventaniando. MK you need to add another tag for this, "chisme".
I like the name Lazaro. I find it mellifluous, even to my English-speaking tongue.
Submitted by snowpiece on Mon, 02/01/2010 - 5:51pm.
nope. never even heard of it.
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"One Shot, One Shot!"
Ronnie 2, Townies 0
Ohhhhh please TvyNovelas is such an unreliable source for gossip news... Does anyone in the latin community remember Aracely Arambula's fake pregnant pictures??????
"Canta y Encanta a tu Pueblo Tigresa"
ME you would like him he's a good actor and very sexay (if you forget how short he is)
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown
PROVY AMORES PERROS!!!!!
have u seen it?
I love this
little dude
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"This is MK. He started it" angel_i
"The Falcon and the Snowpiece?" Plecostomus
"snowpiece is officially to be known as hopiece from here on out." TheBreakdown
I really don't care. But i can't think of the name Gael w/o giggling about that HIMYM episode with GUY-ELLE.
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"I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way."
I will GLADLY have his baby!
Lazaro? for real??. Fugly FUGLY name, man. It's like that baby was born 200 years ago on a small dusty pueblito. Ugh!. And I have no clue who Dolores Fonzi is, but her name sucks too.
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-"I am not about to deal with unstable people" - HEART ANGELINA.
Submitted by Plecostomus on Mon, 02/01/2010 - 5:24pm.
Guess Bernal fell for yet another Fonzi scheme.
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you clever ho! you beat me to it. AHAHA
Whoa, that's rough. Cheating is shitty enough, but having a kid without certainty of who the father is (and telling one of them with certainty that he IS the father) is devious to the nth degree.
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FIST PUMP!!
Guess Bernal fell for yet another Fonzi scheme.
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Bottom-feeder.
Gorge your eyes on Gorgeous Georgina : http://sites.google.com/site/gorgeousgeorginashow/home
"And if this plays out like one of my abuelita's novelas, then Lazaro will turn out to be the switched baby of Dolores' long-lost evil twin sister who lives in a trailer at the carnival."
This made my day ... Mk u r fucking crazy!!!
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 02/01/2010 - 5:20pm.
Its good, its in spanish but if you don't mind subtitles I highly recommend it.
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"One Shot, One Shot!"
Ronnie 2, Townies 0
I don't get it - why all the drama? Just do the paternity test and there's your answer. Nothing to shout about.
P.S. he's gorgeous - if she cheated on him she's an idiot.
Santa Maria! Steppin out on Gael!! For shame.
He's even hotter in person...just sayin
Provy, nope.
Submitted by M.E. on Mon, 02/01/2010 - 5:18pm.
Who are these people?
You've never seen Y tu mamá también?
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"One Shot, One Shot!"
Ronnie 2, Townies 0