Boner's Body Has Been Found

He was hot. Don't dig dudes with long hair though. RIP.

This is really sad I remeber Boner rest in peace dude!

Awful!

yucko> You will succeed. :) I came back to read this b/c it does really help to find out you're not as alone as you think you are.
I've tried thinking of it as just a trsin depot on the way to somewhere else. Maybe that'll help you, too. :)
A chance to regroup and rethink.

Movie,The Bridge on HULU:

http://www.hulu.com/watch/95971/the-bridge

At least his mother and father have their boy back. That would kill me, not knowing where he was.

Submitted by Anonymouse73 on Thu, 02/25/2010 - 11:37pm.
Tequilatax> I, too, get really anxious and worried b/c of my depression and it does drive people away.

I tried Zoloft at one point and all it did was give me tics and make me even more paranoid than I already am! I'm not fond of anti-depressants, but whatever works for someone...it's worth it.
My depression right now is situational, but it's still pretty bad and I think going off The Pill (no insurance) has made it worse. No job (I quit), no home of my own (parents. eek!), yeah...that'll do it.
But I have always felt a pervasive sense of depression, even in grade school.
...

But now (5 yrs later) I am back to feeling horrible. I cry constantly, am very sensitive to what people say, have some not-so-friendly thoughts about myself. I don't know how to fix it. I am NOT a fan of shrinks as I'm a v. private person.

-----

Not sure about the likelihood of you seeing this now, but I'm in a similar situation to yours.

I'm at 'home' now (my mother's house) with no job, after taking time off school because for a prolonged period I'd been having a hard time motivating myself to do the work and go to class. So now I'm here, in what is as much if not more a situational depression than chemical one. Although I think I've had a mild mental depression for a while now... I just feel like I can't do anything but fail lately. I will be happy when summer or fall rolls around and I'm hopefully reenrolled, I just hope I can bring myself to succeed (I have perpetually been a few classes short of graduating). I plan to try to see the counselor, and hopefully that helps, as long as I actually do it.

I also appreciate what people have shared about their own experiences with depression. Sometimes I don't feel entirely comfortable attributing my failures to depression--like maybe I'm just too lazy in the end.

Thank you all for your stories. You have touched me more than words can adequately express.

Whether you are a world class fashion designer, a former actor or an everyday Joe schmo, we are all just trying our best.

Submitted by freshfacestripper on Fri, 02/26/2010 - 9:52am.
rip in peace! fuk...
pray for my grama who is dying of cancer too! thanks
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I will send positive thoughts your way. (And to your grama.)
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"gobble a bowl of dicks" submitted by HOTNEY

Oh, why couldn't it have been John Mayer?!

Rest In Peace Andrew..so very sorry it had to come to this & my best wishes to his family & friends.

God Bless

Submitted by Bowchickawawa on Fri, 02/26/2010 - 10:52am.

______________

Yup agree, at the end of the day it does become cyclical or as you say the chicken or the egg. Definitely a bit of both.

I am still holding on to the belief that if I didn't experiment with mind altering substances, I wouldn't have completely gone off the deep end for a while there. I had depressive tendencies, yes, but the last thing my mental stability needed were the highs and the extreme lows that came from drug use. But yeah, if drugs only came with the highs, I would still be self medicating :)

He said that someone with schizophrenia or bi-polar disorder probably isn't going to be willing to go & testify
_________________________

This is the goddamn truth and it's pathetic.

Every single person I know with depression/anxiety/bipolar WILL NOT USE their work insurance to pay for shrinks/meds; they are afraid they'll lose their jobs. They pay on their own, and none of them are rich. Far from it.

Mental illness is still considered a character defect, not a brain disease.

Unfortunately, the legions of mentally ill people taking their meds every day, working and being productive members of society would never speak out for fear of "losing their place" so only the severely ill, "crazy" looking, sounding mentally ill represent us in American society.

Something really needs to be done about this. The American healthcare system is draconian.
________________________________
"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think."

Submitted by Centaurious on Thu, 02/25/2010 - 9:01pm.
Mental illness is terribly discriminated against, starting from the fact that physical illness and mental illness do not have parity in the American healthcare system, and unless you come from money you are SOL.

*************************************************************************

Ain't that the fuckin' truth! I was bitching to my shrink recently about how my copay to see him was higher than my copay to see any other doctor. It's usually $25, regardless of what kind of doctor it is, but for "mental health" it's $50. He said he felt that this was a form of discrimination, & that supposedly there are things going on in congress now trying to solve this problem.

He also made another good point. He said that someone with schizophrenia or bi-polar disorder probably isn't going to be willing to go & testify in front of a congressional committee, unlike someone with say, Parkinson's disease or cerebral palsy. The lawmakers know this & count on this, which is not much is done in the way of healthcare for people with mental illnesses. It actually made a lot sense.

Submitted by parkerj on Fri, 02/26/2010 - 9:09am.

Also, I think what makes things worse these days are the availability of ridiculously strong recreational drugs... I think it can do a number on sensitive people, or especially those who might have depressive tendencies. I had a sick 5 year episode of depression after college, and I'm pretty sure it was in part brought on by the partying I did.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This could be a "chicken and the egg kind" of situation though. Many people, suffering from some sort of untreated and/or undiagnosed depression, anxiety or personality disorder tend to self-medicate their symptoms. I think that a great number of recreational drug users/abusers and alcohol abusers are actually self-medicating and not "drunks and druggies" without morals or ethics. It may have appeared that your depression was brought on by partying, which maybe it was, but it may have been there all through your partying and you just didn't recognize it for what it was. I only say this because I went through it too. Everyone is different and my experience doesn't have to be yours too but give it some thought and let me know what you think.

On the subject of meds, I've been taking them for major depression & anxiety since about 2001 or so. My mother has been taking them for bi-polar disorder for years. The meds saved my life & keep my mother from losing her fucking mind. So I don't necessarily think it's always "the meds".

The thing with depression & other mental illnesses is this: people suffering from it need to be constantly keeping it in check by going to see a good psychiatrist regularly. I went through 3 of them before I finally found one I liked. I also had to go through several different medications before we finally found one combination that worked. And from time to time your meds to have to be changed or the dosage adjusted. That's just part of it.

The big mistake I often see people making is allowing their general practitioner to treat them for whatever mental disorder they have. G.P.'s aren't specifically trained to deal with this. Mental illness is just like any other disease: you need to see a specialist. If you had heart failure you would see a cardiologist. If you had cancer you would see an oncologist. If you had HIV would would see an infectious disease specialist. If you had diabetes you would see an endocrinologist, etc., etc., etc. Mental illness is no different. Seeing a psychiatrist regularly is not only good for therapy, but it also helps keep an eye on whatever meds you're taking to make sure they're working. That way, if they stop working, you & your doctor can try different combinations until you finally do find something that works. There was a point when I got so fucking depressed & suicidal in 2001 that I ended up checking myself into the psych ward in the hospital on the recommendation of my family doctor, because he knew he didn't have the tools to help me. Sometimes hospitalization is necessary, because it allows people to keep an eye on you & it also helps the psychiatrists to better observe you & see what medications are or aren't working.

The point is, I'm sick of all this "don't take your meds!" bullshit being told to people who don't even have degrees in medicine. They've only read something online or in some magazine & decide that it must be true. I also see a lot of people who don't understand how treatment for mental illness works & see someone on meds go off the deep end & suddenly think that that must mean all of the meds are bad & no one should take them, & that simply isn't the case. The wrong medication *can* be dangerous, & that's why people need to be under the care of a psychiatrist until they get the combination right. I do think anti-depressants are over-prescribed in this country, but that doesn't mean they don't help the people who need them. Like I said, they've kept me & my mother sane, & I've seen countless other people stop taking their meds thinking they don't need them only to seen it end in disaster. One lady I knew kept telling me I "didn't need all that medicine". She decided she didn't need her medicine either, & after she had been off her meds for a bit decided that she didn't need to live either & killed herself by overdosing. I've also seen other people who I thought were never going to be normal finally get on the right medications & turn into happy, productive members of society.

Bottom line, the meds didn't kill Boner. Untreated depression did.

@Evil_Cupcake: tasty!

Submitted by Green Is Good on Fri, 02/26/2010 - 9:51am.

I am always happy to share! *hands Green is Good bag of frosting*

Rest in peace, Andrew...

______________________________________________

I don't know about other gossip/news outlets, but I don't think MK has been disrespectful at all in his reporting. Even I keep referring to this dude by his one name moniker "Boner"..its sort of like Cher or Madonna. Otherwise I have no idea who Andrew Koenig is, no one would recognize that name. "Andrew Koenig's body has been found" would have been the most formal and respectful title, but I would be like WHO DAT?? Thats my opinion on the matter.

rip in peace! fuk...
pray for my grama who is dying of cancer too! thanks

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 02/25/2010 - 7:17pm.

I am so tired of bad news!

*holds frosting piping bag for comfort*

***************************************************

Don't Bogie the frosting, EC. Pass it this way. That's confort food.

Sad, I really thought they might still find him alive somewhere. And I love you MK, but can't ya have a little more respect for the guy now and call him by his real name? RIP Andrew.

I understand that most of us creative types today (including myself) border on the sociopathic and have great difficulty expressing feelings of anything other than bitchery and fuckery, but I wish people would begin to get a grasp of how serious depression and suicide are. It's a major killer today, right up there with cancer and AIDS.
Personally, I am on anti-d's and had the experience of coming home one day and discovering my roomate's dead body (suicide). Sadly, my chronic major depression is not treated with the same sympathy and concern that the more physical illnesses are.
And now, just to show you how sociopathic I can be, maybe being called BONER your whole fucking life would drive a person to it.

I knew this wouldn't turn out well. It's a shame too. He was probably chewed up and spit out by Hollywood and the depression didn't help. What a cute guy, too bad we didn't get to see him in more things other than that odious Growing Pains.

I was hoping they'd find him alive and well and I'm so sorry to hear of his passing. Once again, though, I'm touched by the sense of community and caring the members here have shown for their own as well as a man who was a stranger.

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I ALMOST threw up my grilled cheese sandwich but with Jesus in your life, you can overcome anything. - boobxqueen on Octomom's Star cover

Also, I think what makes things worse these days are the availability of ridiculously strong recreational drugs... I think it can do a number on sensitive people, or especially those who might have depressive tendencies. I had a sick 5 year episode of depression after college, and I'm pretty sure it was in part brought on by the partying I did.

MK has been kind with the boner comments. I've seen some really bad ones elsewhere.

"I am sorry about your friend, but come on, this is Dlisted. If you truly love Michal K and Dlisted like you say, then you should realize it's pretty ridiculous to expect both of them to change just because someone committed suicide. MK's comments on this matter were certainly not tasteless whatsoever, and Andrew Koenig himself is the one who agreed to forever be known as "Boner". If you don't like what you see here, click somewhere else. It's pretty simple."

Whoever wrote this is painfully stupid. You give me a headache, you vile piece of shit. He agreed to be known as Boner his entire life? Oh goodness..

Submitted by SkyBitch on Fri, 02/26/2010 - 12:06am.
***Submitted by DWF on Thu, 02/25/2010 - 11:54pm.
I love you Michael K and I love Dlisted but I have to say this as someone who lost someone very close to her to suicide. He has a name. It's Andrew Koenig. It was not "Boner." He was a real human being with serious problems and real people are devastated as a result of this.

It just bothers me that I actually saw jokes about his name this week. (Not that the headline is a joke, just, seeing it elsewhere bothered me.)
***

I am sorry about your friend, but come on, this is Dlisted. If you truly love Michal K and Dlisted like you say, then you should realize it's pretty ridiculous to expect both of them to change just because someone committed suicide. MK's comments on this matter were certainly not tasteless whatsoever, and Andrew Koenig himself is the one who agreed to forever be known as "Boner". If you don't like what you see here, click somewhere else. It's pretty simple.

777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777777

Hmm, so Andrew agreed to be known for the rest of his life as Boner, because he played a character on tv? That is interesting. I assumed that once an actor completed a role on a tv show or film, he went back to the name he was given at birth. You learn something new every day.

RIP and condonlences to his family. If you are on an anti-depressant, please don't stop them cold turkey and ask your loved ones to watch for any personality changes.

RIP Boner! May you flap your wings in heaven!
***
HILARY DUFF IS SUCKING THIS DUDE'S COCK! http://bit.ly/ar79gf

I didn't know he played the "Joker" in Batman:Dead End, why does it seem like people just die after they play that role. Well Jack N. didn't, but Heath did. ..ughh Yeah God, give us a break..geez.

can't god give us a break for one fucking day with all this death?

My condolences to bone and his family

___________________

"she is lucky to be alive, because that ugly stick almost beat her to death".

hotmess119's dad.

Why am I reading all these posts, and listening to Prince's "Controversy" it's making me feel better for some reason. This is a sad day...dayum!

I'm really surprised to see how many of you funny bitches are going through the same bad shit that I do. Although I wish no one else had to feel this way, it's nice to know I'm not alone. *group hug*

☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠☠
BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."

If anyone here is on anti-depressants and is thinking of stopping, please do as Mustang Sally said and go off them slowly. I took Zoloft two different times and the tapering off slowly went much better than cold turkey.

To everyone who feels depressed, please know you're worth getting help and you deserve a better life for yourself. I spent almost ten years utterly depressed, feeling totally hopeless, alone, lost. The only thing that kept me going were my two kids. Six years ago I divorced their father and with the help of psychologists and perseverance on my part, I'm in a much better place now.

A big virtual hug to everyone out there, especially those struggling. You're not alone and there are definitely many, many decent, intelligent, funny people here at Dlisted. And if that is what it takes to get through the day, remember us here who have been and are going through something similar.

Prayers to Andrew and his family. So very, very sad.

Nice post MK, and my condolences to Andrew's family, and everyone suffering from depression

For anyone suffering from depression-GET HELP!!! There are free clinics, non-profits, you name it. There are so many people who want to help you. It is so devastating to family and friends when someone commits suicide. The loved ones left behind are racked with guilt second guessing themselves about what they could have done differently.

On another note, I have been reading a lot of posts about being "blue" and hiding behind masks. Unfortunately, American society puts a premium on appearing "happy." We are rarely allowed to feel our emotions anymore. We don't want to burden others, or feel we are different because we are sad.

Sadness is a part of life though and deserves its place just like every other emotion. Don't feel bad, because you feel sad or depressed. I think we are a more depressed society, because we are not allowed to feel our emotions fully any more and that is a horrible shame. Part of being human is asking for help and realizing we need it. Humans are social animals and rely on each other.

Also, if a therapist is not working for you, get another. Therapy is a lot about chemistry. Not everyone clicks with everyone and it is about finding the right match.

I hope people are paying attention to this tragedy.

nono> Good! I'm so glad!

Ugh I was hoping against hope this wouldn't be how this story turned out.
Depression is a dark and cruel bitch. Such a shame. May he find his peace and may his family and friends find comfort. My heart just breaks for everyone involved.

I like how this has gotten everyone talking about their experiences with suicidal feelings or friends/family who have taken their own lives. Maybe something good can come out of this thread.
MK, you're a classy lady, drop the 'boner' talk - this isn't 4chan.

Such kind eyes. We need to stop losing the good ones!

Oh. Also. I hope this doesn't sound too facile or whatever, but honestly? What helped me, too, was to go do charity work. Of course, if you can't even get up the energy to get out of bed, that might be a difficult venture.
But if you have mild to moderate depression, working at a food pantry or something makes you feel really good. Plus you are interacting w. other people who have the same purpose in mind. It also keeps you busy and keeps the Monkey Mind (cycling thoughts)at bay.

Oh. Also. I hope this doesn't sound too facile or whatever, but honestly? What helped me, too, was to go do charity work. Of course, if you can't even get up the energy to get out of bed, that might be a difficult venture.
But if you have mild to moderate depression, working at a food pantry or something makes you feel really good. Plus you are interacting w. other people who have the same purpose in mind. It also keeps you busy and keeps the Monkey Mind (cycling thoughts)at bay.

Submitted by Mustang Sally on Fri, 02/26/2010 - 12:16am.

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Haha, you underestimate my addiction to Dlisted!

Thank you for sharing your story with me. I can see how my life and the lives of those closest to me are becoming affected by my depression and that I need to get over my fear of seeing someone b/c I am doing myself a major injustice.

I spoke to my husband tonight and shared with him for the first time really how I feel. I listed all the symptoms. I explained to him that the reason I have trouble getting out of bed is not laziness but that I wake up every morning thinking "shit, I just woke up, can I just force myself back to sleep so I don't have to face today?" The reason that I no longer seem ambitious is because nothing matters to me anymore. I explained to him that I don't want to be like that, but I have tried for years to do it on my own but I can't. He said he just wants me to be happy and to do whatever it takes. So tomorrow first thing I am going to schedule an appt. to start looking for a new approach.

Thanks everyone who replied for your help. You have all helped me do something I have been keeping myself from doing for years. Who would have thought I would get the courage to do this from Dlisted? lol

I don't understand the youth today. Maybe not everyone is like my 27yr old niece, but she just texted me, and said she saw this lady parked in her car next to her bawling her eyes out like crazy, and how sad it was. I asked her what was wrong, and she was like...I don't know. So, obviously she didn't even ask her if she was OK...Good Grief!!! I wish people would reach out to each other. If you see someone like that, please ask if they're OK, it can make all the difference in the world. Has anyone in her watched "The Bridge"? Ohh maybe it's not the time, but it just reminds of that. Some of these people were crying before they offed themselves, and no one stopped to ask them anything...SAD!!! RIP Andrew!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PnqVocIZLY

"mentally interesting"! I like it!

Yeah, I think Catholic Charities has a sliding scale mental health facility w. MSW's. I don't think that would help me. I feel SO uncomfortable letting other people inside my head. And the last shrink I had was so freaking bossy I wanted to punch her, & I quit after like 4 sessions.
But anyway, Catholic charities is there if there is anyone out there who doesn't have insurance and who needs to talk to someone. My MSW was very nice, but I didn't dig her trying hypnotherapy. Some people might be ok w. that, though.

I think my peace of mind will greatly increase once my environment changes a little. I plan on moving back to warmer climes once I get a job, buying a house so I have my own space again (and not have to live with scarily angry people anymore), all that jazz. The rest are things I can't really change: my best ex-bf getting married in June (to someone else), dad having cancer, other boyIlove blowing me off...when it rains, it pours, yeah? So...idk what the answer is. Because you *can't* change stuff like that.
And that really bothers and upsets me.

You know, as snarky as yall can be sometimes, you're good people. Just know that.

And this poor kid...he was in such inner turmoil and pain. Once you get to a certain point, it's impossible for you to consider the ramifications of your actions. Technically, I guess you could call that "selfish" in that he was only thinking of himself at the time, but...depression does bad things to your brain. It tells you that you don't matter. People don't commit suicide b/c they love themselves. Quite the opposite. They're not tring to hurt other people. They just want to stop hurting inside.

Love you all!

I've been more of a lurker than a poster lately, particularly at night, but I've been reading so many people's stories on here, & they've really touched me. I hope everyone takes Andrew's dad's words to heart. Life is not for the weak, God knows, & it's not easy. But, I think (I hope) for everyone who feels they have nobody, there is someone who'll be there for you. If you just open yourself up & give them the chance.

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"So? I'm intellectual and stuff."
"You're flunking English. That's your mother tongue, and stuff."

This is just so sad. I feel for his family. A good friend of mine that I have known since we were kids shot herself on Thanksgiving and I always find myself going over and over the last time we spoke. She seemed fine but I have this tremendous guilt that maybe I could have said something to change things even though I had no idea what was going through her mind. I have anxiety that has caused bouts of depression over the years so I know that hopeless feeling all too well. Her suicide has left me so confused and if it wasn't for my baby girl I don't know how I would be getting through this. I hope Andrew's family and friends will be able to find some kind of peace. I feel like such an idiot posting this but I really needed to say something.

***Submitted by parissucksliterally on Fri, 02/26/2010 - 12:40am.
I just got home, and this made me VERY sad. RIP Boner.***

My sentiments exactly. Scroll down a little in the comments and brace yourself for a verbal beatdown from others though. I've got your back.

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BIGGEST COMPLIMENT EVER:
"skybitch, you are one of most disgusting posters here ever. period."