The Next Time You Have Sex In The Middle Of A Busy Road.....

......make sure to smile a money shot smile and perk your titties up, because there's a good chance a motorist could be taking your picture! And your mother would be so upset if you were caught on camera not smiling.

The Sun says that German police want to arrest the romantic couple above for doing sexy times in the middle of a busy road in Krefeld, West Germany. One motorist said that the two bumped fupas for almost 10 minutes. A local cab driver added, "I nearly crashed my cab, it's not something you see every day in the middle of the road."

The cab driver obviously never drives by Gerard Butler's house, because this is an hourly occurrence over there.

If the police really want to find these road whores, all they need to do is check the nearest buffet or ask the local clinic if a dude with chaffed nalgas and gravel bits stuck in his asshole came in for treatment.

Posted by: Michael K

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Submitted by Noelegy on Fri, 03/05/2010 - 4:36pm.

The other night, while watching "Law Abiding Citizen," I realized that Gerard Butler bears a distinct resemblance to a younger Randy Quaid.

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Really don't mind if you sit this one out
My words but a whisper, your deafness a shout
--Jethro Tull

Submitted by TheBreakdown on Fri, 03/05/2010 - 10:03am.

And the ho stroll just got a lıttle bıt wider.

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Submitted by HoityToity on Fri, 03/05/2010 - 9:55am.

A couple of prostitution whores! But hey, more viagra power to them--you know they were on something to be that "spontaneous". On a side note--fucking on gravel has to be pretty painful. Right?

Submitted by saschaforever on Fri, 03/05/2010 - 1:30am.

I am actually from Krefeld and I got drunk yesterday... so it could have been me pounding that exotic whale with her Rapunzel-hair in the middle of the street.

But then again I am not that bald, I didn't get arrested and haven't caught any STDs (yet).:)

Submitted by Reese2029 on Fri, 03/05/2010 - 1:02am.

I'd give them a pass if they were good-looking. Since they're fugly, they need to take it indoors.

Submitted by But.Seriously.Folks on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 8:36pm.

Big 'uns need love too. Get it, you filthy beasts! I would welcome such a ridiculous display on my commute. Best excuse for being late, evah!

Ok, enough pontificating, I need some liquor.
-LOVE ANDERSON

Submitted by PinkStripes on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 8:05pm.

and make sure you take a picture of the bald spot on the back of his cranium.

Submitted by azgirl on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 6:37pm.

Ew. Streets are filthy dirty, this is yucky. I am all for spontaneous, no time to get your clothes off kinda sex, but the place needs to be somewhat clean.

Nothing says hot sex like, tar, gas, motor oil, piss, drinks that people dump out of their car window. *shutters*

Submitted by bohemeballerine on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 6:12pm.

This would make something like NASCAR a lot more interesting

Submitted by angel_i on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 6:00pm.

I saw that once on a school trip! LOL!

Seriously - we were on our way singing our songs or whatever and we stopped at a red light and some kid yells: OMG! LOOK AT THAT! And (i don't know - do you guys have "islands"...it's like a strip of grass or sidewalk or both in the middle of a busy road) right there on the island was a couple going at it looked JUST like this.

Y'all are jellus, I know:)

♥ Threadkilla!
One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.
~ Kurt Vonnegut

Submitted by Ang on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 5:10pm.

She must have knees of steel.

Submitted by yepyepyep on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 5:03pm.

I did it on the beach and my hotel balcony and jaccuzi and car and etc...............
but not in the street yet

"I will pee myself today and when someone asks, "what is that smell?", I will happily tell them Veluptuous by KK!" Urmomma

Submitted by super martian r... on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 4:55pm.

This goes to show all you sluts who thought you were being adventurous doing it on the kitchen table ain't seen nothin yet :)

Submitted by JeffreyDahmer on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 4:29pm.

Gross, FAT SEX!

Submitted by Jana on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 4:23pm.

I love sex, but absolutely not on the sidewalk or street. This is a case of prostitution.

Submitted by Little China Doll on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 4:22pm.

I'm sure someone's already said this because I'm tardy for the pussy party, but I honestly thought that was Snooki (adjusting her poof).

Submitted by hannahsatana on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 4:17pm.

Cheaper than a motel room, no fear of crabs infesting your leather seats and tons of free publicity...

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Submitted by Emeriesan on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 4:16pm.

I like how she is re-arranging her hair in the middle of it, I mean bad hair can ruin your public image.

Submitted by LisaL on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 4:03pm.

Good grief... what on earth would possess people to do shit like that? Well.... other than a ton of drugs and alcohol..... nm I think I answered my own question.

Submitted by Jill-The-Ripper on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:59pm.

What's he doing with his hand?

Submitted by Dog on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:56pm.

Evil, it's worth it! Caramel Carrot Cake!

On topic, I always heard Germans were tight-assed and prudish. Well!

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Everything I need to know is in my head.......or it isn't.

Submitted by chinchilla on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:55pm.

Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:49pm.
I must say she does look quite glamorous though. A thing of beauty, a gleaming pearl in the middle of the road.

( I don’t have the brilliance of MK but you catch my drift)

*giggles* @ gleaming pearl

A silvery hubcap adrift in a sea of mottled asphalt.

Submitted by Jana on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:53pm.

being topless on a beach anywhere in Europe is normal. Here, North America, I'd stand out if I dared. Maybe get prosecuted too.

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:51pm.

Submitted by Dog on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:45pm.

OMG! I would resort to canabalizing my own people to have a slice (meaning half the cake) of that 7-Layer Caramel praline cake!

*drooooooooools*

Submitted by Whamo on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:49pm.

I must say she does look quite glamorous though. A thing of beauty, a gleaming pearl in the middle of the road.

( I don’t have the brilliance of MK but you catch my drift)

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:47pm.

Submitted by Die gelangweilt... on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:40pm.

LOL! I totally get what your saying.

Submitted by Dog on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:45pm.

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:34pm.
*throws Dog a cheeseburger sans gross toppings*

*gulps cheeseburger and noses around for beer*

Hey, Evil! Look! A kind of a companion site to the cupcakes site I sent you! www.carolinescakes.com

*drooooooooooools*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Everything I need to know is in my head.......or it isn't.

Submitted by get serious on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:44pm.

It'd be one thing if they were great looking, naked & humping away. However, that pic (with kinda fat middle aged people boinking) is like looking at your parents going at it; it's creepy & my impulse is to immediately turn away...

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"I've never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don't like eating fish. And I know that's very popular out there in Africa." - Brit's Tits

Submitted by ILovePapaSmurf on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:41pm.

This is so fucking unsanitary, I feel like throwing up.

This is almost as gross as the time Sookie and Bill fucked after he had been buried underground for more than 24 hrs. on "True Blood."

Ew.

Ew.
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Submitted by Die gelangweilt... on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:40pm.

I knew Germany was much less prudish about nudity, which is cool, but I didn't have any idea they sent peeps out nude to get reactions. Weird.
I guess it really wouldn't be too surprising to see stuff after a while.

We have specific tv formats here which are known for showing a lot of topless girls and it's quite ridiculous to witness to what great lenghts they go to justify this. If they want to show naked boobs they do a report on women not wearing 'the right bra size' or stupid shit like that so that they can show some young girls shopping for bras and testing them i. e. putting them on/taking them off etc. And you see this every day here. Mind you, you will never see a dick on German TV cause this would be 'porn', inappropriate and unsuitable for kids but you will always see some tits for free.
So, you can imagine two drunk pieces of scum fucking on the streets at night is not a big deal here in Germany.

♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬

Rrridiaouw woo oo rrri-ou!

Submitted by Rdeadline on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:40pm.

They're lucky they didn't get hit by a car!

Submitted by trillian on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:36pm.

OK I live in Cologne which is not far from Krefeld and I have to read this on Dlisted because there was nothing in the local papers ... I guess we are used to worse shit :-)

Submitted by double booked tart on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:35pm.

It's one thing to have sex in public but it's a whole other thing to be the crazy fucker who sees them then pulls over to watch. I mean, seriously, how else would that guy know they had sex for ten minutes. I'm thinking a stopwatch isn't the only thing this random motorist pulled out.

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:34pm.

Submitted by Dog on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:32pm.
HI EVIL! HOW'S YOUR FROSTING?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's buttercream, and it's superb!

*throws Dog a cheeseburger sans gross toppings*

Submitted by Jana on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:33pm.

sorry about my poor grammar, sure you understand, i'm just busy and multitasking. :)

Submitted by Dog on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:32pm.

HI EVIL! HOW'S YOUR FROSTING?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Everything I need to know is in my head.......or it isn't.

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:32pm.

Submitted by CandyPerfumeGirl on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:26pm.
Why the fuck do people still say West Germany? There is no West Germany. There is only one Germany. The cold war and with it the wall that separated east from west Germany fell over 20 years ago. I know it is hard to think about a world that exists outside the US realm, but really, give it a try. Not everything revolves around the US, even though everyone likes us to believe that.

55555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555555

I don't know what you are so upset about. MK was repeating what The Sun said. He didn't say West Germany, The Sun reported it that way, so, your tirade= FAIL. Isn't The Sun a BRITISH publication, not U.S?

Submitted by Jana on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:32pm.

The same way ppl say West Germany and East still, is like they still call Czechoslovakia. Old habit die hard. Not that i have anything against my Czech neighbors, but communism is dead.

Submitted by Evil_Cupcake on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:28pm.

Submitted by Die gelangweilt... on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:23pm.
@Cupcake: You see so many naked girls on German TV it's not even funny anymore. They send naked or topless girls on the streets for tv shows to tape how people will react to it and then air those reports in the afternoon when kids will most likely watch it.
I haven't heard about this incident so far and Krefeld is not that far away from where I live.
People here in Germany don't care about such things and Krefeld is a very small city or not even a city. I think it's safe to say that there aren't that many people on the streets at night in Krefeld who would have witnessed something like that.

♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬

I knew Germany was much less prudish about nudity, which is cool, but I didn't have any idea they sent peeps out nude to get reactions. Weird.

I guess it really wouldn't be too surprising to see stuff after a while.

Submitted by CandyPerfumeGirl on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:26pm.

Why the fuck do people still say West Germany? There is no West Germany. There is only one Germany. The cold war and with it the wall that separated east from west Germany fell over 20 years ago. I know it is hard to think about a world that exists outside the US realm, but really, give it a try. Not everything revolves around the US, even though everyone likes us to believe that.
...

-----------"Charlie you fucking bitch, let's work it out" - High Fidelity

Submitted by Die gelangweilt... on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:23pm.

@Cupcake: You see so many naked girls on German TV it's not even funny anymore. They send naked or topless girls on the streets for tv shows to tape how people will react to it and then air those reports in the afternoon when kids will most likely watch it.
I haven't heard about this incident so far and Krefeld is not that far away from where I live.
People here in Germany don't care about such things and Krefeld is a very small city or not even a city. I think it's safe to say that there aren't that many people on the streets at night in Krefeld who would have witnessed something like that.

♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬♩♪♫♬

Rrridiaouw woo oo rrri-ou!

Submitted by JustJack on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:23pm.

That's the Breakdown whoring it up in Germany!

Submitted by warmislandsun on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:22pm.

It kinda looks like Leah Remini and Kevin James.

Submitted by Albatross on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:21pm.

I love that she's messing with her hair while she's riding him. LOL!

**********
"No escapin' when I start
Once I'm in, I own your heart"

Submitted by BBGemini on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:18pm.

I've always sung a second verse to "Why Don't We Do It In The Road".

" 'Cause you'll get gravel in your crack..."

Submitted by warmislandsun on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 3:15pm.

Submitted by kittycatastrophe on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 2:36pm.
Nasty slag, whore, bitches...what the fuck were they on? Whatever it was it kept them turned on and tuned out all at the same time
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Damn, now I want some.