Thursday, March 11th 2010
Hot Slut Of The Day!
My Abuelita, a book for ninos by Tony Johnston and Yuyi Morales
Anything that has the word "abuelita" on it automatically gets the "Hot Slut" stamp. It's the way things work. The book's description is the syrup on the flan:
Abuelita's hair is the color of salt. Her face is as crinkled as a dried chile. She booms out words as wild as blossoms blooming. She stuffs her carcacha--her jalopy--with all the things she needs: a plumed snake, a castle, a skeleton, and more. Her grandson knows he has the most amazing grandmother ever--with a very important job. What does Abuelita do? With her booming voice and wonderful props, Abuelita is a storyteller. Next to being a grandmother, that may be the most important job of all.
The book's description is charming, but the real talk truth is that my abuelita would never step outside without covering her salt-colored hair with a black lace veil or a Kangol hat. Or a Kangol hat on top of a black lace veil. Everything else is pretty much on point. All abuelitas permanently have a side-eye on you at all times and they are always cracking their knuckles in preparation for battle.
P.S. - That little gay boy's eyebrows of perfection deserve a standing ovation.
(For Darcy)
• 
Abuelita looks like those dried apple "granny" dolls we used to make.
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Really don't mind if you sit this one out
My words but a whisper, your deafness a shout
--Jethro Tull
Sounds like abuelita, from the stuff in her carcacha, might be the local curandera :-D
i guess you are not receiving email because mine that i send you at michaelk@dlisted.com was returned,and I was going to correct you about the ñ or Ñ
when you type ñ or Ñ
you just use the keys in your keyboard
and hit
Alt+ 164 which it makes ñ
or
Alt+165 making Ñ
ok bye. so no more emails for you or to you , is this because of the jennifer aniston crap ?
All I can say is that I'm REALLY happy they included a definition of carcacha.
♥ Threadkilla!
One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.
~ Kurt Vonnegut
Permanent side-eye? LOL. Hear you, MK. All those who don't have an abuelita in their lives, they don't know what they're missing.
Tony Johnston is a wonderful children's author (5-7th grade, depending on reading level). He writes amazing latino characters and his books are full of food references. And, he uses words like "pinche" which really gets the spanish speaking students excited about reading!! Check out "Any Small Goodness" .........
ROTLMAO @ "That little gay boy's eyebrows of perfection deserve a standing ovation".
Good morning Dlisters. Great way to start the day off with a good hearty laugh. Thanks MK.
TEAM GEORGE LOPEZ - F*ck Erik Estrada.
wonderful props? all mine had was cigarettes and a hair net.
abuelita [ah-boo-ay-le-tah]
noun
1. Grandma, granny, grandmother. (f)
BTW. After all this time i thought abuelita was like a really tough old babysitter. Granny!
My abuelitas never slapped me around.
The book's description is charming, but the real talk truth is that my abuelita would never step outside without covering her salt-colored hair with a black lace veil or a Kangol hat. Or a Kangol hat on top of a black lace veil.
GOD! Hahahahahaha!
So this should be here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fWrtsMh79uo
Abuelita goes hard rock
and
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5sjNao5-O5U
Daddy Yankee Abuelita
BTW is niÑo, cos' nino is a name... ñ (ALT+164)
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"Quentin Tarantino makes me want to wipe my face off, because you know he spits out a saliva tsunami every time he talks" MK
What she is missing is a silver backed hairbrush along with a purple hair rinse veil and Kangol. I cant believe your Gramma used to wear a Kangol too!!! The silver backed hair brush is for spanking your bunda for reasons known only to her....like....for crying too loud in a shop, or telling her "no, I dont want to" Or "Im Bored"
"I was never bored in my day." Boredom is a modern affliction apparently. Spoilt children we all are.
I'll burn that bridge when I come to it....
Ahhh you whole life is starting to make sense M.K.